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(Twitter)   Tennessee congressman Tim Burchett invents the 15-minute Christmas party   (twitter.com) divider line
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4432 clicks; posted to Politics » on 10 Dec 2022 at 1:45 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-12-09 8:35:27 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-12-10 1:04:24 AM  
Refreshments will possibly be provided. Well that's encouraging. Might as well say hand jobs and gold chalices will possibly be provided. I mean there's a non-zero chance that might spontaneously happen.
 
2022-12-10 1:12:54 AM  
Can't wait for the vocal stylings of Louis Gohmert.

"Imma sing you a little song I wrote mahself called, 'If you don't want me lickin' windows, why'd you make 'em taste so good?' ... and a 1 and a 2 .... HurrrDURRRdurdurp ..."
 
2022-12-10 1:49:43 AM  
I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site. As a xennial, i say with very little hyberbole I would rather die.

So honestly a 15 minute party? Sounds great. If I'm being railroaded to attend, please by all means make it quick.
 
2022-12-10 1:58:14 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-10 1:59:52 AM  

Ringshadow: I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site. As a xennial, i say with very little hyberbole I would rather die.

So honestly a 15 minute party? Sounds great. If I'm being railroaded to attend, please by all means make it quick.


That's unfortunate. My company lets the employees pick a nice restaurant and they buy us a couple drinks. It's a really nice, laid back night. The company picks up the entire tab.  I think they budget $150 a person or something.
 
2022-12-10 2:00:42 AM  
Even they don't want to spend more than 15 minutes around themselves.
 
2022-12-10 2:03:36 AM  
Hot Cocoa sampler sips may be provided.
 
2022-12-10 2:09:18 AM  

Ringshadow: I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site.


I'll preface this by saying that I'm really fortunate in that I do really love my job (but, c'mon, who doesn't b*tch about their job?) and the company I work for is incredible, I love the people I work with...

But yeah. I'm not going to your stupid holiday party. I see enough of you people as it is. I can buy my own dinner.

Keep your chicken. I'm only here for your money.
 
2022-12-10 2:10:01 AM  
'Is everyone here?  Good, now get out!'
 
2022-12-10 2:12:55 AM  
He's not a regular piece of shiat insurrectionist light election denier,he's a piece of shiat insurrectionist light election denier that got the jokes folks!  omg sooooooo funny,you should continue to amplify and attempt to normalize elected officials that tried to stop the electoral college vote! good job subby.
 
2022-12-10 2:24:17 AM  
A fifteen minute Christmas party? What did they do, get a vinyl 45 RPM single of yakety sax and play it at 33 RPM?
 
2022-12-10 2:29:27 AM  

paulleah: That's unfortunate. My company lets the employees pick a nice restaurant and they buy us a couple drinks. It's a really nice, laid back night. The company picks up the entire tab. I think they budget $150 a person or something.


Bro I just want to go home. I just want to go home. I ride the bus to work typically and making an exception to drive in, just so I can stay late and completely fark up my routine to spend time around a bunch of people I already spend a lot of time around sounds like a Hellraiser nightmare.

Consider how many hours I'm already at work around my coworkers. Even if I like them, why the hell would I want to spend more time with them on someone else's terms? Fark that. If I like them they have my phone number and we'll make our own plans. One coworker and I are already planning on seeing Cocaine Bear together because that is absolutely going to be an experience you have to share with someone.

I mean I'm glad your company takes care of their people but its not the 1980s and this is not Nakatomi Plaza.

DannyBrandt: I'll preface this by saying that I'm really fortunate in that I do really love my job (but, c'mon, who doesn't b*tch about their job?) and the company I work for is incredible, I love the people I work with...

But yeah. I'm not going to your stupid holiday party. I see enough of you people as it is. I can buy my own dinner.

Keep your chicken. I'm only here for your money.


yes, this, all of this, I love my job, especially since I shifted facilities on site and I shifted what management I'm under, but I already spend enough time with them.

/and honestly, I carefully control my diet for various reasons
//and ffs my one food allergen is cream cheese, a Christmas party sounds like a gastrointestinal nightmare
 
2022-12-10 2:47:03 AM  
Merry Chris...I'm sorry. Our time is up

Refreshments were provided. You missed them
 
2022-12-10 2:49:57 AM  
Back in 2005 when I was listening to 911 calls overnights , the company had a standard party. They also had a monthly pizza or dinner thing. Well, obviously my shift couldn't attend any of those , but the owner , May you Rest in Peace George Ulmer , made sure that pizzas , food , beverages , snacks, what have you ( no alcohol ) was taken to the office so we could have some. Once in a while He loaded up his car with everything and delivered it himself.
And the other side of the coin - the orchid company gave me either 5 or 10 bucks for lunch because I was on the road and wouldnt be able to eat some crap burrito that each person at the farm was getting on xmas eve day.

I hated graveyard and the stress of listening to you people complaining about kids burning blunts in the park, but damn. I miss that job
 
2022-12-10 3:03:20 AM  
I think there's more a Carhartt reference there. Working people might spare 15 minutes on a work day for a Christmas party. Unless you're one of those people who wear Carhartt because you can afford to rather than need to.
 
2022-12-10 3:09:29 AM  
The war on Christmas lasts only 15 minutes
 
2022-12-10 3:54:40 AM  
Our library Xmas party is Sunday. We're all volunteers (just regular volunteers, not proper Tennessee Volunteers...except for me) so it's a nice time to get together.

I'm making my signature peanut butter cookies, and will share the secret recipe:

1 cup peanut butter
1 cup sugar
1 egg

Bake at 375 degrees for 9 minutes. The best peanut butter cookies you will ever eat.
 
2022-12-10 3:56:29 AM  
I dunno if this is a horrible idea. I've been to a bunch of Xmas and office parties that I wish were only fifteen minutes.

I'll never forget a comment from one of my coworkers about office parties: "I spend 40 or more hours a week with these those assholes. WTF makes them think I want to spend my free time with them? That just makes them even bigger assholes."
 
2022-12-10 4:34:30 AM  

paulleah: Ringshadow: I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site. As a xennial, i say with very little hyberbole I would rather die.

So honestly a 15 minute party? Sounds great. If I'm being railroaded to attend, please by all means make it quick.

That's unfortunate. My company lets the employees pick a nice restaurant and they buy us a couple drinks. It's a really nice, laid back night. The company picks up the entire tab.  I think they budget $150 a person or something.


How about giving me $150 to save or spend my own way and letting me leave work on time instead of making me spend extra hours the company's way during a holiday season meant for friends and family?
 
2022-12-10 5:47:44 AM  
That sounds...fine, actually. I might steal this idea.
 
2022-12-10 6:12:26 AM  
To be honest, 15 minutes is about as long even a saint could tolerate Louis Gohmert.
 
2022-12-10 6:28:15 AM  

DannyBrandt: Ringshadow: I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site.

I'll preface this by saying that I'm really fortunate in that I do really love my job (but, c'mon, who doesn't b*tch about their job?) and the company I work for is incredible, I love the people I work with...

But yeah. I'm not going to your stupid holiday party. I see enough of you people as it is. I can buy my own dinner.

Keep your chicken. I'm only here for your money.


You know who gets promoted? Look 90% of it is on physical appearance and willingness to be a bootlicker, but the other is a participation score.
 
2022-12-10 6:41:13 AM  

Unscratchable_Itch: I dunno if this is a horrible idea. I've been to a bunch of Xmas and office parties that I wish were only fifteen minutes.

I'll never forget a comment from one of my coworkers about office parties: "I spend 40 or more hours a week with these those assholes. WTF makes them think I want to spend my free time with them? That just makes them even bigger assholes."


It's forced socialization.

Sometimes I work late to finish a project. Sometimes I work late to socialize.

I'm a "high performer," but that doesn't excuse me from the forced socialization. In fact, being at the Golf Outing or Volunteer Day or not being a missing face during events that seem to only exist to lick Managements' collective asses have a higher value on my reviews than the number of projects I finish in a week or how many action committees I have to support with data and insights.

It's all work. The stuff I feel matters and the stuff they do.
 
2022-12-10 6:44:02 AM  
I tend to not mind holiday events at work myself; on the graveyard shift, I have a lot of coworkers I don't get to see normally.  Potluck meals at noon, great.  Christmas events tend to be later in the day, after my bedtime.  I'll have to respectfully decline those.
 
2022-12-10 6:52:18 AM  

goatharper: Our library Xmas party is Sunday. We're all volunteers (just regular volunteers, not proper Tennessee Volunteers...except for me) so it's a nice time to get together.

I'm making my signature peanut butter cookies, and will share the secret recipe:

1 cup peanut butter
1 cup sugar
1 egg

Bake at 375 degrees for 9 minutes. The best peanut butter cookies you will ever eat.


I make similar cookies for a friend who has celiac/wheat issues.

2 cups crunchy peanut butter
1 cup sugar
1 cup brown sugar
4 eggs (beaten)
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

Bake 350 for 10-12 minutes. Let them cool a bit before removing them from the baking sheet as they are very soft.
 
2022-12-10 6:54:57 AM  
This is exactly how long every party should last.

/introvert
 
2022-12-10 7:02:01 AM  
Y'all get office holiday parties? Well la di da, aren't you fancy. We're lucky execs have pretty much checked out for the year so there's unlikely to be another round of layoffs before 2023.
 
2022-12-10 7:21:58 AM  
I would put money down 100% that this has to do with being on unpaid break time.

Two fifteens and a half per eight hour shift? They can kiss my ass if they think I'm spending my break doing anything other than whatever I want besides this.
 
2022-12-10 7:45:42 AM  
15 minutes is an eternity. 15 attoseconds is still too long.
 
2022-12-10 7:47:38 AM  

Ringshadow: I'm getting multiple emalis a day at work trying to convince me to come to the department Christmas party, after work hours and off site. As a xennial, i say with very little hyberbole I would rather die.

So honestly a 15 minute party? Sounds great. If I'm being railroaded to attend, please by all means make it quick.


I have a friend whose holiday party is during work hours, but not billable as work. He's gotta work late other days or take PTO.
 
2022-12-10 8:00:30 AM  

Ghastly: Refreshments will possibly be provided. Well that's encouraging. Might as well say hand jobs and gold chalices will possibly be provided. I mean there's a non-zero chance that might spontaneously happen.


Never tell me the odds
 
2022-12-10 8:03:55 AM  
I used to work at a Rigging company. It was me, the only girl, and 20-25 men.

The first xmas being there was coming up and the bosses wanted to know what they could do different because every year before they'd take everyone out to dinner and ask they would do is get plastered and never eat the food.

I suggested a half day on Xmas eve, but with full day pay, and a bunch of pizzas. Everyone loved it. Our Xmas bonus was an extra week of pay. Since I did payroll in house, by the end of December, and since I knew I had already paid all my taxes for the year, I'd leave out paying fed w/h, just pay SS, Medicare & state tax on that extra pay. That check was huge for me to have at the end of the year. And when one of the guys and me got together, bought a house etc, I'd do both our bonus checks that way. Bosses loved it to cause they don't have to match our w/h.

Accountant told me all was good. It was. I miss those bonuses.
 
2022-12-10 8:09:23 AM  
no seconds!

eatlikenoone.comView Full Size
 
2022-12-10 8:11:04 AM  

Kirkenhegelstein: Can't wait for the vocal stylings of Louis Gohmert.

"Imma sing you a little song I wrote mahself called, 'If you don't want me lickin' windows, why'd you make 'em taste so good?' ... and a 1 and a 2 .... HurrrDURRRdurdurp ..."


I've heard Louie's rendition of In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida just fits into 15 minutes.
 
2022-12-10 8:17:31 AM  
It was ten minutes too long, but I waited around for the possible refreshments.
 
2022-12-10 8:19:57 AM  
Good.  Office parties suck.

Every year we get to comment on what we want and every year I make the same comment: "why not have a lunch on a Friday and then after lunch everyone gets to go home".

There are three farking Fridays in December before Christmas, I don't need to spend one of those nights pretending to like my co-workers.

GTFO.

Of course I get voted down every year for some fancy shindig because apparently everyone else wants to socialize with co-workers outside of the office.

/get off my farking lawn
 
2022-12-10 8:23:56 AM  
Sounds about right.  Time for a good photo op, then GTFO.
 
2022-12-10 8:25:20 AM  
I've only ever had about 15 minutes of fun at any work Christmas party I've ever attended, so this makes a lot of sense to me
 
2022-12-10 8:33:56 AM  
I went to high school with Tim Burchett and was a grade behind him. In fact, my friend and I went on a double date with him once (she was his date, I went with another guy friend). He was a genuinely good guy. He was even a good sport when everyone deliberately mispronounced his last name as Birdshiat. Even when he was first elected to Congress he seemed perfectly reasonable for a conservative.

Then he drank the Trump Kool-Aid.

In the past few years he has become completely unrecognizable. He's bought into the brainwashing and thrown in his lot with the most unhinged wing of the GOP (which is basically all of them at this point). I find it astounding and sad what those extremists have done to our country. I doubt we'll recover from it in my lifetime.
 
2022-12-10 8:52:58 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-10 8:57:20 AM  
Our Christmas party is going to be during the day and paid.  It's going to be a pretty big shindig.  The woman organizing it is not getting any credit, not getting paid and still has to do the same amount of work otherwise.  But of course a bad party will negatively reflect on her.  Anyone who gets too grinchy about it can fark right off.
 
2022-12-10 9:28:53 AM  
This year's Christmas party the org VP scheduled it at some buffet and told us we were buying our own due to "current economic conditions". I stayed at work, finished my testing and went home.  Pass, I'm not paying to go have some buffet with coworkers even if I like them.  It's not like I can eat $18 worth of buffet food...anymore.
Luckily I have the best manager ever, seriously love the lady.  She doesn't bug unless it's something big and even then she's right in the middle of it helping.  She took our team to a very nice lunch last week and "ordered" us to go home after and spend time with our families.  As a team we'd do anything for her.
 
2022-12-10 9:30:05 AM  
My wife's workplace is planning a holiday party in January, probably so they can get better deals. The last office party, there was a "mixer" game that ran over by two hours while the food got cold. She has zero intention of going to the next one.

I was in IT my whole career and there were very few office parties regardless of the company. We liked it that way.
 
2022-12-10 9:45:08 AM  
I'd bet dollars to donuts that, as a singer, Louie Gohmert is no John Ashcroft.

/let the eeeeeeeeeeeagle sooooooooooar.....
 
2022-12-10 9:50:28 AM  

baronbloodbath: [Fark user image 425x192]


I wonder if he's like Gomer Pyle, who had such an amazing singing voice, disguised by the thick hillbilly drawl...  Maybe Louie Gohmert is like a Gomer Pavarotti

Nah, I doubt it
 
2022-12-10 9:56:10 AM  
My company dropped the ball hard this year as far as holiday festivities. We have a cookie contest during lunch Monday combined with an ugly sweater contest... and that's IT.
 
2022-12-10 10:01:45 AM  

kittenfoo: I went to high school with Tim Burchett and was a grade behind him. In fact, my friend and I went on a double date with him once (she was his date, I went with another guy friend). He was a genuinely good guy. He was even a good sport when everyone deliberately mispronounced his last name as Birdshiat. Even when he was first elected to Congress he seemed perfectly reasonable for a conservative.

Then he drank the Trump Kool-Aid.

In the past few years he has become completely unrecognizable. He's bought into the brainwashing and thrown in his lot with the most unhinged wing of the GOP (which is basically all of them at this point). I find it astounding and sad what those extremists have done to our country. I doubt we'll recover from it in my lifetime.


He didn't drink the Kool Aid, he got permission to be his true self out loud. You just never saw that part because he politely kept it hidden as a reasonable society should. Putting that horror back in the box will cause it to rot and fester until it boils into violence, so, Yes, this country is indeed screwed for many years to come. Nevertheless, we must start now and keep moving.
 
2022-12-10 10:25:33 AM  
Refreshments may be provided?
I can't get people to show up to the Xmas party unless it's an open bar!
 
2022-12-10 10:31:47 AM  
Yeah, blow me.

My office does a Christmas party every year. It's always an hour, best management can be asked to do is get a few boxes of premade cookies from Meijer and set them out with a couple bottles of generic cola. It's the saddest and most pathetic Christmas party ever, and every year I just leave. One year I got some pushback from management for leaving, and my response was simply "where were you? ". The answer was that they were leaving for a cruise that evening, as they always do. So they can afford a $10,000 3 week cruise but they spend maybe $10 thanking people for their service at the holidays.

I would rather be sitting in traffic on my way home.
 
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