Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Lifehacker)   How to half-ass Christmas breakfast   (lifehacker.com) divider line
50
    More: Fail, Almond, Cheese, Need, Want, Full breakfast, Food, Meat, Breakfast  
•       •       •

1170 clicks; posted to Food » on 09 Dec 2022 at 10:20 PM (14 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



50 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
vudukungfu [TotalFark]
2022-12-09 9:53:54 PM  
My dad would pull a huge tray of homemade sticky buns out of the freezer And let them thaw on the oven as they proofed and the oven heated. While we opened gifts.
Once everything was picked up and no more wrapping paper was lying about, it went in the oven.
 
Aussie_As
2022-12-09 10:23:53 PM  
Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.
 
Trocadero
2022-12-09 10:34:46 PM  
If you make a rib roast the lowest/slowest method, you need to start about breakfast time if you're eating it for dinner.
 
Trocadero
2022-12-09 10:40:53 PM  
Also, I'll point out that my family does Seven Fishes on Christmas Eve, which means we're doing antipasto anyway, so we'll skip similar stuff for breakfast.
 
Some Junkie Cosmonaut
2022-12-09 10:42:46 PM  

Aussie_As: Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.


It does lack a certain Clairity
 
luna1580 [TotalFark]
2022-12-09 10:47:47 PM  

Aussie_As: Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.


CLAIRE will never have "one of the better ideas on food tab" and you know it!
 
shpritz
2022-12-09 11:00:12 PM  
Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?
 
Fear the Clam
2022-12-09 11:00:46 PM  

Trocadero: Also, I'll point out that my family does Seven Fishes on Christmas Eve, which means we're doing antipasto anyway, so we'll skip similar stuff for breakfast.


That's when you do the Seven Swedish Fishes.
 
olrasputin
2022-12-09 11:01:45 PM  

shpritz: Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?


Heh I was wondering the same thing.

Maybe she only consumes olives via martini?
 
Trocadero
2022-12-09 11:04:50 PM  

shpritz: Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?


Depending on the variety, they're a little too salty to go w/ coffee.

/unlike my women, I like them salty AND bitter
 
DannyBrandt [TotalFark]
2022-12-09 11:18:22 PM  

Trocadero: shpritz: Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?

Depending on the variety, they're a little too salty to go w/ coffee.

/unlike my women, I like them salty AND bitter


I like my women like I like my coffee.

Ground up and in the freezer.
 
Vermithrax Perjorative
2022-12-09 11:42:40 PM  
It's called cereal.
 
Izo [TotalFark]
2022-12-09 11:45:08 PM  
you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
shpritz
2022-12-09 11:51:26 PM  

Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]


What's the pink stuff in the top container? That's the only thing that looks dodgy there.
 
bud jones
2022-12-09 11:53:16 PM  

Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]


ok, who tongued the deviled eggs clean?
 
Klippoklondike [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 12:15:25 AM  
Can't wait for the next 47 Claire links in the next few days, including mind blowing ideas like:

putting toppings on your hot chocolate
mixing mayonnaise with sour cream
using orange peels as air fresheners
 
Some Junkie Cosmonaut
2022-12-10 12:16:25 AM  

luna1580: Aussie_As: Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.

CLAIRE will never have "one of the better ideas on food tab" and you know it!


She might wake up one day and post, "I'm so, so sorry... no more mayonnaise!"

/I'd suggest buying a lottery ticket instead of expecting it though - better odds
 
olrasputin
2022-12-10 12:44:48 AM  

Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]


Wait--where the fark are the egg yolks?
 
DannyBrandt [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 12:48:07 AM  

olrasputin: Wait--where the fark are the egg yolks?


I take it you've never used Alabama sunscreen/ skeeter deterrent before.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 12:49:48 AM  

shpritz: Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?


Besides Popeye?
 
NINEv2
2022-12-10 1:13:23 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: Aussie_As: Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.

It does lack a certain Clairity


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
DogParkSniper
2022-12-10 1:33:33 AM  
This is too much.

We left Santa a few cookies and a bottle of Michelob.

Dad woke up for Christmas with a few crumbs and the stench of rubber band on his breath.
 
DogParkSniper
2022-12-10 1:37:38 AM  

Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]


That said about my dad's shiatty effort...

I'd dig down the 1.25" septic vent for that. I do rental-property maintenance, you see.

For me, that's any given Tuesday.
 
Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist
2022-12-10 1:58:40 AM  

bud jones: Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]

ok, who tongued the deviled eggs clean?


Thanks, ala Bama.
 
bughunter [recently expired TotalFark]
2022-12-10 3:40:50 AM  

shpritz: Izo: you could always do a regional version:  Charcuterie ala Bama
[Fark user image 850x637]

What's the pink stuff in the top container? That's the only thing that looks dodgy there.


I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess potted meat.

farm9.staticflickr.comView Full Size


Imagine a hot dog without a skin.

Prechewed.

By a St. Bernard.

/carolina boy
//yes, I've eaten this
///by choice
 
RoyFokker'sGhost
2022-12-10 3:54:00 AM  
'Sorry there's no presents this year, kids. I spent the budget on jamon iberico for a proper Christmas breakfast...'
 
Jake Havechek [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 6:01:25 AM  
Biscuits and gravy.
 
fsufan
2022-12-10 6:57:08 AM  

Jake Havechek: Biscuits and gravy.


^^^Winner^^^
But to clarify.  Biscuits and sausage gravy.
 
eyeq360 [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 7:22:14 AM  
Tater tots grilled cheese and bacon waffle sandwich.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
eyeq360 [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 7:42:20 AM  

luna1580: Aussie_As: Fail tag seems a bit harsh, Subby. It's one of the better ideas on the Food tab, and there's not a single mention of mayonnaise.

CLAIRE will never have "one of the better ideas on food tab" and you know it!


I was expecting something like "Cold pizza is great for breakfast. Some people decorate ham with pineapple. So cold Hawaiian pizza should be better. Add maraschino cherries for a festive holiday touch!"
Then you end up with this.
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size

Or this, because they confused bananas with banana peppers.
preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
Richard Corinthian-Leather
2022-12-10 9:14:14 AM  
And just last night I was thinking of reworking my watermelon & jalapeno salsa as pizza topping.

Hmmmmm...
 
tigerbot hesh
2022-12-10 9:53:27 AM  
Charcuterie is a dec 24th afternoon thing when all the guests come in from all over.  Doing either bennies with a latke base or shakshouka on the morning
 
cookiedough
2022-12-10 11:08:34 AM  
My family eats meat pie- tourtierre for breakfast.
Growing up Catholic, we'd go to midnight mass, come home eat meat pie at 130am, open our presents then go to bed around 5am. No one has the stamina or religiousness for that anymore, but still meat pie before presents.
 
Deathbymeteor
2022-12-10 11:09:20 AM  
And yet, it wouldn't be the worst Xmas Day breakfast I've ever had at a family gathering.  That particular honour goes to the last one before COVID.  No leftovers in the house after Xmas Eve, and my cousin and her husband unveil their hard work making Xmas Day Brunch: a bunch of boxed appetizers that took a combined 75 minutes from out of box to serving (big oven did like 4 packages at a time).

10 people, eating boxed appetizers for Xmas morning brunch...and then my cousin and her husband saying that their cooking commitment was done and they wouldn't be helping with the actual Xmas Day dinner.

The old man and I had to sneak to a gas station to get food to eat for ourselves.
 
luna1580 [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 11:11:14 AM  
We always make stuffing then eat bowls of it on xmas morning. Sounds better to me than cold meat and cheese
 
Deathbymeteor
2022-12-10 11:11:29 AM  

cookiedough: My family eats meat pie- tourtierre for breakfast.
Growing up Catholic, we'd go to midnight mass, come home eat meat pie at 130am, open our presents then go to bed around 5am. No one has the stamina or religiousness for that anymore, but still meat pie before presents.


We do tourtierre for Xmas Eve in our immediate family.  Not because Catholic or anything, but because our Brit forebears were obvious lovers of meat pies, and Great Grandpa developed a love of tourtierre specifically after moving here with his new wife after WWI
 
Bruscar
2022-12-10 11:26:15 AM  
The last few years the kids were at home, they wanted Christmas Brunch or Lunch with Cajun/Creole. We'd have lobster tail, shrimp, sometimes scallops and/or crawdads cooked in either Etoufee or in a light, spicy creole cream sauce along with grits and biscuits. We'd soften onions, garlic, ginger, and hot peppers in sesame oil before adding our chicken broth to cook our collards. Our son liked to have our own peculiar version of Vietnamese coffee - extra weak and extra sweet with lots of milk and condensed milk and a bit of cinnamon. We finished off with the usual sweet potato pie and pecan pie. Sometimes we had a chocolate pie as well, but if we did, we just bought it from the store.
 
Anoria [BareFark]
2022-12-10 11:38:53 AM  

Deathbymeteor: cookiedough: My family eats meat pie- tourtierre for breakfast.
Growing up Catholic, we'd go to midnight mass, come home eat meat pie at 130am, open our presents then go to bed around 5am. No one has the stamina or religiousness for that anymore, but still meat pie before presents.

We do tourtierre for Xmas Eve in our immediate family.  Not because Catholic or anything, but because our Brit forebears were obvious lovers of meat pies, and Great Grandpa developed a love of tourtierre specifically after moving here with his new wife after WWI


Tourtierre is Christmas Day dinner at my parents' house, every year, in tribute to our French ancestry. I felt it was more apt than usual in 2020 when we had Christmas on the patio and ate steaming soup mugs full of meat pie in our lawn chairs in the snow.

Christmas breakfast is usually individual grazing on leftovers, cookies, and whatever snacks people gave you on Christmas Eve. There's no need to organize anything until at least lunchtime.
 
Deathbymeteor
2022-12-10 11:42:37 AM  

Anoria: Deathbymeteor: cookiedough: My family eats meat pie- tourtierre for breakfast.
Growing up Catholic, we'd go to midnight mass, come home eat meat pie at 130am, open our presents then go to bed around 5am. No one has the stamina or religiousness for that anymore, but still meat pie before presents.

We do tourtierre for Xmas Eve in our immediate family.  Not because Catholic or anything, but because our Brit forebears were obvious lovers of meat pies, and Great Grandpa developed a love of tourtierre specifically after moving here with his new wife after WWI

Tourtierre is Christmas Day dinner at my parents' house, every year, in tribute to our French ancestry. I felt it was more apt than usual in 2020 when we had Christmas on the patio and ate steaming soup mugs full of meat pie in our lawn chairs in the snow.

Christmas breakfast is usually individual grazing on leftovers, cookies, and whatever snacks people gave you on Christmas Eve. There's no need to organize anything until at least lunchtime.


We did the same normally for Xmas Day breakfast, but that one year we were in a house that is morally opposed to leftovers.  Like, they buy basically enough for the meal, and that's it, which, when cooking for 10, is both impressive and annoying.

Great Grandpa just loved tourtierre after moving to Canada, and after having served with French troops, knew they were on to something when he tried it the first time.
 
wildcardjack
2022-12-10 12:25:14 PM  
Nope, you're all doing Christmas breakfast wrong. It should be in a casino buffet with mimosas. Actually, Christmas breakfast should be mimosas for everyone, even the kids. Heck, especially the kids. Over wound for presents they don't see the irrelevance of, give them a headache and maybe they'll stop asking for toys they associate with headaches.
 
hlehmann
2022-12-10 1:05:04 PM  
A recipe I got from a coworker many years ago.  A casserole of browned ground sausage, eggs, cheddar cheese, a bit of yellow mustard, and a lot of white bread.  Yeah, it's pretty white trashy, but it's what I've made for every Christmas morning, and only Christmas morning, for the past 20 years or so.  I'm not about to go against tradition now.
 
ski9600 [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 2:48:16 PM  
JFC, the meats aren't even folded in the picture!  I am outrage!
 
ski9600 [TotalFark]
2022-12-10 2:55:31 PM  

eyeq360: Tater tots grilled cheese and bacon waffle sandwich.
[Fark user image 480x480] [View Full Size image _x_]


wow, I might have to search the re-gifting stores for a waffle maker.  I lurv tater tots.
 
apoptotic
2022-12-10 3:47:57 PM  
Charcuterie strikes me as entirely too much salt for breakfast, or anytime really, but that's none of my business.

I assume my Christmas breakfast will be a cup of coffee and maybe an orange, because despite my repeatedly offering to make a frittata, 'tradition' dictates that we all sit down to gush effusively over a platter of piping hot homemade cinnamon buns that, for varying reasons, literally none of us present can actually eat.
 
I Swear I'll Jump
2022-12-10 4:06:21 PM  

shpritz: Do people actually have an issue wirh eating olives in the morning?


Well, some prefer an onion in their martini.
 
Space Station Wagon
2022-12-10 8:55:48 PM  
Pie is what's for breakfast
 
yakmans_dad
2022-12-10 9:41:19 PM  
I have made 1 chocolate babka. For Christmas breakfast last year. As an example of the perfect babka it was terrible. As something to eat it was fantastic. I'll give it another try this year. Fingers crossed. But I suspect that it's an example of the kind of thing, like sex, that's all good.
 
Some Junkie Cosmonaut
2022-12-10 9:52:05 PM  

yakmans_dad: I have made 1 chocolate babka. For Christmas breakfast last year. As an example of the perfect babka it was terrible. As something to eat it was fantastic. I'll give it another try this year. Fingers crossed. But I suspect that it's an example of the kind of thing, like sex, that's all good.


It's babka, unless you do pretty unspeakable things to fark it up it's gonna be tasty

/let's not even talk about gluten free
 
Ken VeryBigLiar
2022-12-10 11:09:13 PM  
Liqueur in your coffee? Maybe it's my Wisconsin showing but Four Roses, Wild Turkey or Jameson are tastier to me. Although I will say good things about this for something sweeter:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
NINEv2
2022-12-10 11:13:40 PM  

Fear the Clam: Trocadero: Also, I'll point out that my family does Seven Fishes on Christmas Eve, which means we're doing antipasto anyway, so we'll skip similar stuff for breakfast.

That's when you do the Seven Swedish Fishes.


In a row?
 
Displayed 50 of 50 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh comments
This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

If you like these links, you'll love

TotalFark

Total access
Total knowledge
Total Fark

learn more | sign up
On Twitter

  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.