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(Law and Crime)   Neighbor of Philadelphia man accused of cutting off his wife's head: "I'm not surprised"   (lawandcrime.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Female, Police, Man, English-language films, Home, Philadelphia Police Department, Victim, Gender  
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4485 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Dec 2022 at 12:35 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



78 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2022-12-01 12:13:31 PM  
"Police reportedly said they found the "severed head" on the kitchen floor."

*Rtfa*

Well, it wasn't like *he* was gonna clean it up, right?

\men are pigs
 
2022-12-01 12:42:03 PM  
That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."
 
2022-12-01 12:42:48 PM  
Finally, an honest opinion from a neighbor.
 
2022-12-01 12:43:07 PM  
"The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.
 
2022-12-01 12:43:39 PM  
Looks like he got ahead of himself while cleaning up...
 
2022-12-01 12:43:51 PM  
TFA: "And the man who did the decapitation, he is, I would say, the most unhinged of them all."

I'm pretty sure his victim is more unhinged.
 
2022-12-01 12:43:59 PM  
I bet she was surprised.
 
2022-12-01 12:44:37 PM  
cnet.comView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 12:45:13 PM  
She did a nice job on the lights before she was brutally murdered. farking war on Christmas.
 
2022-12-01 12:45:32 PM  
" She brought that on herself, your honor"

Case dismissed.
 
2022-12-01 12:46:21 PM  

LarrySouth: Looks like he got ahead of himself while cleaning up...


Bit of a tiff then..?
 
2022-12-01 12:46:29 PM  
Thought 1: That seems like the kind of thing you'd want to report...
Thought 2: Yes, that's pretty much the mental image of a man accused of cutting off his wife's head.
 
2022-12-01 12:47:00 PM  

Gyrfalcon: That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."


I'm glad we finally have reached this point. "We all knew he'd do a thing like this but how you gonna report him before he does something? He'd just behead US!"
 
2022-12-01 12:47:22 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


They didn't specify that it wasn't a chicken.
 
2022-12-01 12:47:29 PM  
It's that time of the year folks

But do you recaaaaaall
The most unhinged adult of all?
 
2022-12-01 12:48:56 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


It's just a little beheaded, it's still good, it's still good!

external-preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 12:51:00 PM  
Neighbor "I'm not surprised. Have you ever tasted her cooking?"
 
2022-12-01 12:51:54 PM  

The Yattering: It's that time of the year folks

But do you recaaaaaall
The most unhinged adult of all?


Ahmad the behead-spoused neighbor,
had a very shiny knife,
and if you ever met him,
You would know he'd kill his wife.
 
2022-12-01 12:52:02 PM  

Gyrfalcon: That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."


I haven't heard this in awhile, really. Whenever something like this happens now people tend to say "oh that motherfarker was weird as fark"

Like the Uvalde gunman. Every person had a bad story about him.

Maybe in the past people were less willing to speak ill of their neighbors, even if they were horrible people.
 
2022-12-01 12:54:01 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


External decapitation is one of the few limited circumstances where on-scene EMTs are allowed to declare a patient dead.  I'm sure it varies from state to state depending on their EMS protocols, but where/when I got licensed it was decapitation, head trauma that exposed and visibly destroyed brain matter, other massive trauma incompatible with life (e.g. upper torso destroyed), and a couple others I'm hazy on from how long ago it was.

Anyways, point being it literally is their training, otherwise you end up with times where the EMTs know from training and experience that the person is dead, but they legally have to go through the motions of transporting to a hospital for the declaration.
 
2022-12-01 12:54:28 PM  

TheDirtyNacho: Gyrfalcon: That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."

I haven't heard this in awhile, really. Whenever something like this happens now people tend to say "oh that motherfarker was weird as fark"

Like the Uvalde gunman. Every person had a bad story about him.

Maybe in the past people were less willing to speak ill of their neighbors, even if they were horrible people.


Nah, it's as recent as the last couple shooters. "He was real quiet, kept to himself" even if he was weird.
 
2022-12-01 12:55:07 PM  
Might I kindly suggest you not read the comments, Ray? Unless you like conservative "humor."
 
2022-12-01 12:55:11 PM  
this is Fark, so....

she was a quiet girl?
Youtube cQGl8-lJuoY
 
2022-12-01 12:55:28 PM  
If we're being honest, I think each and every one of us knows at least one person that might wind up on the news for something like this.  Hopefully they aren't part of your inner circle (or neighbor) but we know of them.

I guess the equivalent for women is knowing that acquaintance that wouldn't surprise you showing up on the news for cutting a dick off.
 
2022-12-01 12:55:41 PM  
Sounds to me like Shareef didn't like it

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 12:57:25 PM  

HotLonelyTeenageGirl: Sounds to me like Shareef didn't like it

[Fark user image image 399x303]


He really really hates it.
 
2022-12-01 1:01:13 PM  

New Rising Sun: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

External decapitation is one of the few limited circumstances where on-scene EMTs are allowed to declare a patient dead.  I'm sure it varies from state to state depending on their EMS protocols, but where/when I got licensed it was decapitation, head trauma that exposed and visibly destroyed brain matter, other massive trauma incompatible with life (e.g. upper torso destroyed), and a couple others I'm hazy on from how long ago it was.

Anyways, point being it literally is their training, otherwise you end up with times where the EMTs know from training and experience that the person is dead, but they legally have to go through the motions of transporting to a hospital for the declaration.


I think rigor mortis counts.  I was on a third ride once and the dude was stiff as a board and quite black.  EMTs just called the coroner.
 
2022-12-01 1:02:01 PM  

Majin_Buu: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

They didn't specify that it wasn't a chicken.


Maybe part chicken
external-content.duckduckgo.comView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 1:03:26 PM  

HailRobonia: The Yattering: It's that time of the year folks

But do you recaaaaaall
The most unhinged adult of all?

Ahmad the behead-spoused neighbor,
had a very shiny knife,
and if you ever met him,
You would know he'd kill his wife.


Nice work. I didn't have it in me
 
2022-12-01 1:05:27 PM  

Gyrfalcon: That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."


SNL did this in the 80s with the murder of Buckwheat. He was quite, kept to himself. Do you think he did it. Yep, never talked about anything else
 
2022-12-01 1:09:27 PM  

Somaticasual: Thought 1: That seems like the kind of thing you'd want to report...
Thought 2: Yes, that's pretty much the mental image of a man accused of cutting off his wife's head.


The guy kinda looks like jon k from the office.
 
2022-12-01 1:11:31 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


I mean, technically speaking, they have to declare a time. So even though it was an easy task, it still had to be done.

"Carl, what're we looking at here?"
"That's a body with its head removed, Lou. Blood everywhere Time of death, 12:56"
"Good work. Bag it."
 
2022-12-01 1:12:46 PM  
Also, I think auntie might be justified in moving the family to belaire....
 
2022-12-01 1:13:24 PM  

New Rising Sun: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

External decapitation is one of the few limited circumstances where on-scene EMTs are allowed to declare a patient dead.  I'm sure it varies from state to state depending on their EMS protocols, but where/when I got licensed it was decapitation, head trauma that exposed and visibly destroyed brain matter, other massive trauma incompatible with life (e.g. upper torso destroyed), and a couple others I'm hazy on from how long ago it was.

Anyways, point being it literally is their training, otherwise you end up with times where the EMTs know from training and experience that the person is dead, but they legally have to go through the motions of transporting to a hospital for the declaration.


I was being fatuous.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 1:13:26 PM  

Majin_Buu: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

They didn't specify that it wasn't a chicken.


Exactly. A competent witch doctor could still revive it
 
2022-12-01 1:16:58 PM  
Does this mean the Iggles are NOT going to the Super Bowl?
 
2022-12-01 1:23:09 PM  
Sounds like the neighbors of John David Stutts.
 
2022-12-01 1:28:29 PM  
The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel," officers said.

Ok. I read the other comments referring to this. But you gotta admit: the actual pronouncement was probably either really funny or really gritty.
 
2022-12-01 1:28:38 PM  
i.postimg.ccView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 1:32:01 PM  

Gyrfalcon: That's a switch from "He was such a nice, quiet man...I can't believe this..."


The one that always annoys me is "This never happens in our little town".   Ummm..it just did.
 
2022-12-01 1:44:05 PM  
Maybe she lost her ipod and decided to be an hero and troll the world at the same time.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 1:49:39 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


They have to be official about stuff like that.  Friend of mine died from a heart attack in the parking lot of a bakery (he was a delivery driver).  Died with his foot on the accelerator, and the engine revving for several minutes caught the attention of a few folks.

Ambulance called, he was taken to the ER, and that's where he was pronounced dead, a good half-hour after the folks pried his foot off the accelerator.

Some places still require a coroner to show up and make it official.
 
2022-12-01 1:50:48 PM  
 John Krasinski working a reboot of The Amityville Horror?
 
2022-12-01 1:54:20 PM  

indy_kid: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

They have to be official about stuff like that.  Friend of mine died from a heart attack in the parking lot of a bakery (he was a delivery driver).  Died with his foot on the accelerator, and the engine revving for several minutes caught the attention of a few folks.

Ambulance called, he was taken to the ER, and that's where he was pronounced dead, a good half-hour after the folks pried his foot off the accelerator.

Some places still require a coroner to show up and make it official.


I'm sorry about your friend, but that story totally reminded me of this and I hope it's not too soon for you

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 1:54:37 PM  
Was it Bill Parker, or that mother scratcher, Bill Roberts, who found the head?
 
2022-12-01 1:57:07 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 2:01:03 PM  
Heard playing in the background on repeat..

Man With The Woman Head (Live)
Youtube i80_wMxXd-w
 
2022-12-01 2:09:13 PM  

Badafuco: I bet she was surprised.


I bet she wasn't.
 
2022-12-01 2:11:21 PM  

extroverted_suicide: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.

[Fark user image 425x285]



Jan in the Pan!!
 
2022-12-01 2:19:41 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: "The victim was pronounced dead, on the scene, at 12:56 p.m., by Medic personnel,"

That's some fine medical training to recognize that the victims headless body was deceased.


Expertlaw > Lawyer Jokes > Trial Jokes > Was He Dead?
An attorney, cross-examining the local coroner, queried, "Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man's pulse?"
"No," the coroner replied.
"Well, then, did you listen for a heart beat?"
The coroner answered, "No."
"Did you check for respiration? Breathing?", asked the attorney.
Again the coroner replied, "No."
"Ah," the attorney said, "So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?"
The coroner rolled his eyes, and shot back "Counselor, at the time I signed the death certificate the man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I can see your point. For all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere."
 
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