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(Pix11)   NYC is looking for a director of rodent mitigation. The rat czar should be a swashbuckling person with a crafty humor, a general aura of badassery and a virulent vehemence for vermin   (pix11.com) divider line
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    More: Interesting, New York City, tongue-in-cheek job listing, new job listing, NEW YORK, director of rodent mitigation, deputy mayor, various angles, operational efficiency  
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944 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Dec 2022 at 9:20 AM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



64 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 8:42:49 AM  
I would imagine some flute proficiency is also preferred.
 
no1curr [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 8:51:20 AM  
Release 10,000 cats, rat snakes, and weasels to do the job
 
TaDu [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 8:54:28 AM  
I can't tell if this is a beginning level quest or if I've wandered into a part of the map I should be in yet.
 
Munden [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 9:10:48 AM  

TaDu: I can't tell if this is a beginning level quest or if I've wandered into a part of the map I should be in yet.


The quest "Significantly reduce rat populations in NYC" is a legendary quest line nobody has even gotten close to completing.  Most players get stuck on the seemingly intractable problem of containerizing trash due to space requirements, leaving an endless buffet for the rats which maxes out the rat regeneration rate, making all other eradication efforts pointless.
 
professionalenabler
2022-12-01 9:21:20 AM  
i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
rnatalie [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 9:21:36 AM  
Are they of unusual size.   Do you know Wallace Shawn of Princess Bride fame lives in NYC?   Perhaps he can take the job.   Inconceivable!
 
a_room_with_a_moose
2022-12-01 9:24:21 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
cefm
2022-12-01 9:24:51 AM  
i.guim.co.ukView Full Size
 
Incog_Neeto
2022-12-01 9:25:07 AM  
I know a guy
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Madman drummers bummers [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 9:25:33 AM  
The rat czar revolting.
 
Marcos P
2022-12-01 9:27:04 AM  
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Vtimlin
2022-12-01 9:27:22 AM  
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Solty Dog
2022-12-01 9:27:54 AM  
Releasing a chemical to make them sterile would work.
 
gamergirl23
2022-12-01 9:28:12 AM  
They would never give me the job, but I think I could actually excel at increasing sanitation efficiency and creatively murdering rodents. Of course, the first thing I'd do is unify the garbage collection to be city run instead of privatized, so if I managed to get the job, I imagine I would be quickly thrown in a dumpster.
 
iheartscotch
2022-12-01 9:28:25 AM  
Voila! In view humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the "vox populi" now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin, van guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.
The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.
Verily this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honour to meet you and you may call me V.
 
Two16
2022-12-01 9:29:19 AM  
64.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 
Cyber Duck
2022-12-01 9:30:28 AM  
I at first read that as rodent migration, and thought no problem.  Just load them all on a plane and fly them to Texas and Florida.  Tell them all the garbage they can eat will be waiting for them on arrival
 
nursetim
2022-12-01 9:31:54 AM  

no1curr: Release 10,000 cats, rat snakes, and weasels to do the job


New York winters are cold enough to freeze gorillas, so that would work.
 
Mad_Radhu
2022-12-01 9:32:03 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
foo monkey
2022-12-01 9:32:10 AM  
tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.comView Full Size
 
GrymRpr
2022-12-01 9:33:30 AM  

Pocket Ninja: I would imagine some flute proficiency is also preferred.


I was thinking old Ken Shabby myself
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
AthensBoy
2022-12-01 9:34:54 AM  
media.giphy.comView Full Size
 
Hinged
2022-12-01 9:38:48 AM  
When killing needs done, you always hire a cat...


Shrek 2 (2004) - Puss in Boots Scene (3/10) | Movieclips
Youtube vaJ2yQC_ktY
 
FarkMeThatsGood
2022-12-01 9:39:36 AM  
I know why it's an awful idea, but can't we just release thousands of cats into the city?
 
kendelrio
2022-12-01 9:42:21 AM  
I had heard the phrase "Rats as big as small dogs" in stories about NYC when I was a kid and thought I was being messed with.

When I moved there, I realized "big as a small dog" actually understated their size.....
 
wax_on [BareFark]
2022-12-01 9:43:01 AM  
They can hire my dog. Nothing he loves better than killing some rats. He actually hasn't killed one in a while because all the rats in our local parks have either run away or been viciously mauled by my dog.
 
dbirchall [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 9:43:46 AM  
static.wixstatic.comView Full Size
 
Algebrat [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 9:46:16 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Hi, pleasure to meet you. I'm a team player with strong management experience, and a track record of success with integrating technology to achieve outcomes.
 
gamergirl23
2022-12-01 9:48:24 AM  

FarkMeThatsGood: I know why it's an awful idea, but can't we just release thousands of cats into the city?


We have a lot of stray cats in my neighborhood. We have even more rats.
 
Toxophil [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 9:49:32 AM  
pictures.abebooks.comView Full Size


/props if you know.
 
Toxophil [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 9:52:03 AM  

gamergirl23: FarkMeThatsGood: I know why it's an awful idea, but can't we just release thousands of cats into the city?

We have a lot of stray cats in my neighborhood. We have even more rats.


Because cats dont actually go after rats, they catch mice and birds. Release rat terriers.

/three farm cats
 
shinji3i
2022-12-01 9:52:22 AM  
Guys, these are NYC rats. They're big, coordinated, and probably armed to the teeth (also big teeth). They're gonna need to go with

i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
Sam's Club Sandwich
2022-12-01 9:54:36 AM  
I saw the biggest rat I've ever seen the other night. Huge. About the size of my upper arm. I'm a native NYC'er so I have seen a lot of rats over the years but this one was humongous. I guess he was the rat king. Rats are the true owners of NYC.
 
xanadian [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 9:58:03 AM  

wax_on: They can hire my dog. Nothing he loves better than killing some rats. He actually hasn't killed one in a while because all the rats in our local parks have either run away or been viciously mauled by my dog.


Terrier?

Maybe NYC should release a bunch of terriers.
 
Fano
2022-12-01 9:58:51 AM  
i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size

Vote for me
 
Madman drummers bummers [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-12-01 9:59:42 AM  

xanadian: wax_on: They can hire my dog. Nothing he loves better than killing some rats. He actually hasn't killed one in a while because all the rats in our local parks have either run away or been viciously mauled by my dog.

Terrier?

Maybe NYC should release a bunch of terriers.


They have had enough problems with terrierists.
 
MythDragon [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 10:02:18 AM  

foo monkey: [tv-fanatic-res.cloudinary.com image 630x420]


No big piece of rebar?
 
Hinged
2022-12-01 10:04:30 AM  

kendelrio: I had heard the phrase "Rats as big as small dogs" in stories about NYC when I was a kid and thought I was being messed with.

When I moved there, I realized "big as a small dog" actually understated their size.....



The Princess Bride - Rat Attack!
Youtube 1jeGpceFDHQ
 
Halfabee64
2022-12-01 10:08:44 AM  

gamergirl23: They would never give me the job, but I think I could actually excel at increasing sanitation efficiency and creatively murdering rodents. Of course, the first thing I'd do is unify the garbage collection to be city run instead of privatized, so if I managed to get the job, I imagine I would be quickly thrown in a dumpster.


Welded into a dumpster and dumped in the Gowanus Canal.
 
The Angry Mick
2022-12-01 10:15:33 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Diocletian's Last Cabbage [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 10:18:14 AM  

nursetim: no1curr: Release 10,000 cats, rat snakes, and weasels to do the job

New York winters are cold enough to freeze gorillas, so that would work.


Not anymoar.  With warmer climates come more pest infestations.
 
Diocletian's Last Cabbage [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 10:21:40 AM  

kendelrio: I had heard the phrase "Rats as big as small dogs" in stories about NYC when I was a kid and thought I was being messed with.

When I moved there, I realized "big as a small dog" actually understated their size.....


A good analogy would be the lions of the Serengeti.  The gnus and water buffalo are many times the size of lions, but a pack will take down a youngster or older prey and still keep the population under control.
 
dbrunker
2022-12-01 10:27:15 AM  
Did the article make mention of flute playing ability?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Gentlequiet
2022-12-01 10:45:55 AM  
Hüsker Dü - How to Skin a Cat
Youtube 6qii5us2lB4
 
GalFisk [TotalFark]
2022-12-01 10:53:38 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Nick Nostril
2022-12-01 11:01:18 AM  
"Mitigation". Sounds like a term Putin would use.
 
EBN-OZN
2022-12-01 11:01:47 AM  
What a rat czar might look like.
i0.wp.comView Full Size
 
BoothbyTCD
2022-12-01 11:15:43 AM  

cefm: [i.guim.co.uk image 850x850]


Cats kill mice. Rats in a group will fark a cat up. You should post a fat terrier.
 
p89tech
2022-12-01 11:15:58 AM  

no1curr: Release 10,000 cats, rat snakes, and weasels to do the job


I'll put a call into the NYS State Assembly right away.
 
avanti
2022-12-01 11:28:45 AM  
Plaster of paris mixed with oatmeal or other grain. They never learn to avoid it and it is effective.
 
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