Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Twitter)   Ceiling cat bat is watching you masturbate, upsidedown   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, shot  
•       •       •

4354 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Nov 2022 at 9:04 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



64 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2022-11-30 7:14:20 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-11-30 7:16:47 PM  
Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?
 
2022-11-30 7:18:06 PM  

aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?


Reverse money shots are weird. Guys just vacuuming up spooge with their wangs.
 
2022-11-30 7:18:22 PM  

aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?


Yes, and if you don't do it exactly right Ozzy will bite the head off of your Willie.
 
2022-11-30 7:43:32 PM  
Hanging bats filmed upside-down look like a Goth nightclub
Youtube G9A8PFlqM4U
 
2022-11-30 7:57:48 PM  
Bats are so cute. Shame they're horrific disease vectors.
 
2022-11-30 9:07:32 PM  
They look pretty tasty.
 
2022-11-30 9:09:49 PM  
This is how we get our next cute coronavirus
 
2022-11-30 9:12:33 PM  

El_Dan: They look pretty tasty.


Well we found patient zero for the next pandemic.
 
2022-11-30 9:14:47 PM  

NateAsbestos: aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?

Reverse money shots are weird. Guys just vacuuming up spooge with their wangs.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 9:16:22 PM  
Is Twitter yet living?
 
2022-11-30 9:19:44 PM  
Contagion Ending
Youtube V1HH1-ozS_A
 
2022-11-30 9:19:52 PM  
ʞɔᴉ
 
2022-11-30 9:21:47 PM  

Exile On Beale Street: [YouTube video: Hanging bats filmed upside-down look like a Goth nightclub]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 9:22:40 PM  
I opened my back door one night and scared a bat who had decided to roost right outside it.

I must have scared it because it took off like a bat out of hell. It scared me pretty good too.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 9:23:05 PM  
Looks shopped, Albinos have those pink eyes.
 
2022-11-30 9:28:20 PM  
My wife told me these might be puppets? There is someone who makes awesome bat puppets.

I wish thats what I did. And
 
2022-11-30 9:35:15 PM  
Stay the fark away from bats. A friend of mine's 8 yo daughter was bit by a rabid bat at school in Sept. Apparently the shots are about as bad as I had always heard.

Poor kid was just a little traumatized.
 
2022-11-30 9:36:09 PM  

NateAsbestos: aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?

Reverse money shots are weird. Guys just vacuuming up spooge with their wangs.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 9:40:23 PM  
Was fap cat a bat all along? Are they using sonar on my boner?
 
2022-11-30 9:41:54 PM  

NateAsbestos: aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?

Reverse money shots are weird. Guys just vacuuming up spooge with their wangs.


Well, how does your dong work smart guy???
 
2022-11-30 9:48:10 PM  

leeksfromchichis: Bats are so cute. Shame they're horrific disease vectors.


So that's your vector, Victor?
 
2022-11-30 9:48:10 PM  

ModernPrimitive01: This is how we get our next cute coronavirus


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 9:59:19 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 10:00:47 PM  

Exile On Beale Street: [YouTube video: Hanging bats filmed upside-down look like a Goth nightclub]


i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2022-11-30 10:07:49 PM  

Vermithrax Perjorative: Stay the fark away from bats. A friend of mine's 8 yo daughter was bit by a rabid bat at school in Sept. Apparently the shots are about as bad as I had always heard.

Poor kid was just a little traumatized.


The CDC suggests that if you wake up with a bat in your room, you should treat it as an exposure because it's possible to be bitten by a bat and not notice.

So if this happens to you and you go through the process of getting the bat tested and then tell people about it, they'll all think you're crazy. Except for the state dept of health guy you call at 4am (there's an emergency number) who will tell you that it's urgent but not an emergency and to get the bat tested.

It's very, very weird to sit there for a few days, knowing that a bat probably didn't bite you and that if it did, it probably didn't have rabies, but also knowing that on the off chance that both of those things were true, you'd need lots of shots ASAP or you would almost assuredly die.
 
2022-11-30 10:19:38 PM  

IgG4: Looks shopped, Albinos have those pink eyes.


Might just be Leucism
 
2022-11-30 10:26:40 PM  

August11: Is Twitter yet living?


Birds aren't real.
 
2022-11-30 10:26:53 PM  
These folks caring for this bat is pretty inspirational
33-Year-Old Bat Loves to Curl Around His Caregiver's Arm and Fall Asleep | The Dodo
Youtube dRnlUUvCTTs
 
2022-11-30 10:32:28 PM  

Vermithrax Perjorative: Stay the fark away from bats. A friend of mine's 8 yo daughter was bit by a rabid bat at school in Sept. Apparently the shots are about as bad as I had always heard.

Poor kid was just a little traumatized.


That's terrible. In high school, I had a friend with an attic bedroom suite. It was an older house. Her windows were arched casement windows with very deep window sills. One window had a small hole in the frame near the top. She had a bat that came through that hole and slept in her room every day. It left via the same hole at night. She named the bat, talked to it, and sometimes brought it bugs. Being teenagers, we thought nothing of it. I guess she was really lucky that nothing bad ever came of the situation.
 
2022-11-30 10:34:16 PM  

natazha: IgG4: Looks shopped, Albinos have those pink eyes.

Might just be Leucism


Yup. We have leucistic squirrels around here and none have pink eyes. To make it more fun, we also have melanistic squirrels.
 
2022-11-30 10:36:04 PM  
Are they albino? I thought pinkish eyes came with the albino thing.
 
2022-11-30 10:41:07 PM  
I love having bats around.

They eat a shiat ton of mosquitoes.
 
2022-11-30 10:44:30 PM  

aleister_greynight: Wait, does that mean I have to jerk off backwards?


Well, no one is saying you *have* to...
 
2022-11-30 10:46:40 PM  
And this is where Pastel Goth comes from
 
2022-11-30 10:52:57 PM  

Dafatone: The CDC suggests that if you wake up with a bat in your room, you should treat it as an exposure


Oops. I did not do...that.

I went and got my thick leather work gloves, and once it got tired of flying around and crawled behind the soundbar, I grabbed it and threw it out the window.

Poor little guy.

Or gal.
 
2022-11-30 10:58:33 PM  
I build 4 new bat houses every winter and out them up on the property
 
2022-11-30 11:06:18 PM  

Holy Carp: I love having bats around.

They eat a shiat ton of mosquitoes.


Bats and possums are nature's S-tier exterminators for parasites.
 
2022-11-30 11:12:43 PM  
I did it like this, I did it like that,
I did it with a ceiling cat bat!
 
2022-11-30 11:22:59 PM  

tekmo: Dafatone: The CDC suggests that if you wake up with a bat in your room, you should treat it as an exposure

Oops. I did not do...that.

I went and got my thick leather work gloves, and once it got tired of flying around and crawled behind the soundbar, I grabbed it and threw it out the window.

Poor little guy.

Or gal.


The odds are absurdly low, for what that is worth. Canada says not to bother.
 
2022-11-30 11:39:06 PM  

Exile On Beale Street: [YouTube video: Hanging bats filmed upside-down look like a Goth nightclub]


Game over, you win the internet for today.
 
2022-11-30 11:49:32 PM  
They are hand crafted plushies.
https://www.reddit.com/r/crafts/comments/plnt2t/here_are_the_needle_felted_miniatures_of_the_bat/
Here are the needle felted miniatures of the bat and a ferret :)
Sep 10, 2021

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 12:05:33 AM  

HairBolus: They are hand crafted plushies.
https://www.reddit.com/r/crafts/comments/plnt2t/here_are_the_needle_felted_miniatures_of_the_bat/
Here are the needle felted miniatures of the bat and a ferret :)
Sep 10, 2021


https://www.google.com/search?q=y_fedorova+bats&tbm=isch
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-12-01 12:43:00 AM  
So everytime you masturbate, a kitten gets his wings?
 
2022-12-01 1:25:42 AM  

leeksfromchichis: Bats are so cute. Shame they're horrific disease vectors.


You're supposed to cook them first.
 
2022-12-01 2:33:11 AM  

leeksfromchichis: Bats are so cute. Shame they're horrific disease vectors.


So are people, genius.
 
2022-12-01 3:29:07 AM  

Trik: These folks caring for this bat is pretty inspirational
[YouTube video: 33-Year-Old Bat Loves to Curl Around His Caregiver's Arm and Fall Asleep | The Dodo]


Thank you. I think that is one of the most wonderful things I've ever seen.
 
2022-12-01 3:59:25 AM  

BoneSmuggler: Trik: These folks caring for this bat is pretty inspirational
[YouTube video: 33-Year-Old Bat Loves to Curl Around His Caregiver's Arm and Fall Asleep | The Dodo]

Thank you. I think that is one of the most wonderful things I've ever seen.


You're welcome.

The flying part gets me every time I watch it.
The bat's face looks like he's having a rapture.
And like it says in the video, reliving / remembering his youth.
And then she take him to the fruit bowl for a treat.
 
2022-12-01 4:04:30 AM  

Dafatone: Vermithrax Perjorative: Stay the fark away from bats. A friend of mine's 8 yo daughter was bit by a rabid bat at school in Sept. Apparently the shots are about as bad as I had always heard.

Poor kid was just a little traumatized.

The CDC suggests that if you wake up with a bat in your room, you should treat it as an exposure because it's possible to be bitten by a bat and not notice.

So if this happens to you and you go through the process of getting the bat tested and then tell people about it, they'll all think you're crazy. Except for the state dept of health guy you call at 4am (there's an emergency number) who will tell you that it's urgent but not an emergency and to get the bat tested.

It's very, very weird to sit there for a few days, knowing that a bat probably didn't bite you and that if it did, it probably didn't have rabies, but also knowing that on the off chance that both of those things were true, you'd need lots of shots ASAP or you would almost assuredly die.


But what about the bat?  Can't we harvest your organs to save the bat?
 
2022-12-01 4:09:20 AM  

vudukungfu: I build 4 new bat houses every winter and out them up on the property


How do you get the bats alternative lifestyles?
 
Displayed 50 of 64 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.