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(Page Six)   "Keanu Reeves still walks among us". Normal people: 😄 Matthew Perry: 🤬   (pagesix.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, River Phoenix, Matthew Perry, Keanu Reeves, Friends, American film actors, bizarreapparent hatred of Keanu Reeves, Heath Ledger die, Viper Room  
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2661 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 25 Oct 2022 at 9:14 PM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



95 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2022-10-25 7:21:46 PM  
Thing about drugs is it amplifies your personality.


You can get sober and still be an asshole
 
2022-10-25 7:23:34 PM  
Reeves gives more money to charity than this dickweed will ever earn.
 
2022-10-25 7:43:35 PM  
Keanu wouldn't share his stash with you, Matt?
 
2022-10-25 7:54:33 PM  
Could he be more tone deaf?
 
2022-10-25 7:59:20 PM  
Been huffing some paint, Matt?  :/
 
2022-10-25 8:29:10 PM  
Keanue Reeves has been approaching Dolly Parton levels of Awesome, and Perry can't stand that?

I mean, I get it. Everyone is a villain in someone's story. There's a guy in Tibet right now cursing Tenzin Gyatso as that little bastich from Qinghai. But to be hating on Keanue is like hating Elvira.
 
2022-10-25 9:14:37 PM  
Keanu is massively more entertaining to watch than Perry ever has or will be, and makes a shiat ton more money

If not for Friends, would Mathew Perry even be a name?
 
2022-10-25 9:16:14 PM  
Matthew Perry has not aged well.
 
2022-10-25 9:18:58 PM  
Witness the birth of every Fark headline from now on announcing someone's death:

"X celebrity has died.  Keanu Reeves walks among us"

It will be amusing at first until it is played into the ground.

/Keanu Reeves asks if you want karate
 
2022-10-25 9:22:56 PM  
My guess is that Keanu banged the girl that friend-zoned Perry.
 
2022-10-25 9:23:17 PM  
Crawl back under your rock you jowly has-been.
 
2022-10-25 9:25:14 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-10-25 9:25:17 PM  

buntz: It will be amusing at first until it is played into the ground.


At which point it will be hilarious.
 
2022-10-25 9:26:43 PM  

buntz: Witness the birth of every Fark headline from now on announcing someone's death:

"X celebrity has died.  Keanu Reeves walks among us"

It will be amusing at first until it is played into the ground.

/Keanu Reeves asks if you want karate


You'll get over it.
 
2022-10-25 9:29:33 PM  
Matthew Perry take Keanu Reeves' name out of your dirty whore mouth!! You don't deserve to be on the same planet!! You were always the most annoying Friend and all of your movies sucked!!!
 
2022-10-25 9:30:46 PM  

Redh8t: buntz: Witness the birth of every Fark headline from now on announcing someone's death:

"X celebrity has died.  Keanu Reeves walks among us"

It will be amusing at first until it is played into the ground.

/Keanu Reeves asks if you want karate

You'll get over it.


Buntz wants steak
 
2022-10-25 9:31:18 PM  

BlackCloudofDespair: You were always the most annoying Friend


Have you erased Ross from your memory and if so please share how?
 
2022-10-25 9:33:19 PM  
Well, Matthew Perry, you are apparently a giant gaping asshole and I no longer have any empathy for your struggles with addiction.  If I believed in karma, I would also believe you were experiencing it.
 
2022-10-25 9:33:26 PM  

Galaxie500: Been huffing some paint, Matt?  :/


i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2022-10-25 9:34:31 PM  

WhippingBoi: My guess is that Keanu banged the girl that friend-zoned Perry.


Wait, you think Matthew Perry is straight? He's gayer than Elton John on a Sunday picnic!
...
I think Keanu turned down a sexual proposition from Matthew.
River Phoenix was known to be bisexual, "For research purposes". And Perry fell in love with him.
 
2022-10-25 9:34:57 PM  
Think about how you'd feel to find out Matthew Perry was moving in next door.  You'd feel meh, I hope he's not a loud cokehead.

Now think about how you'd feel to find out Keanu is moving in next door.  Wahoo!  We'll have him over of BBQ and beers.  I hope he likes basketball.  And fishing.  And we could build a treehouse!  This is awesome!
 
2022-10-25 9:36:49 PM  

Redh8t: Wait, you think Matthew Perry is straight?


I don't think about him at all.
 
2022-10-25 9:39:05 PM  
I'm sorry, who is he?

Oh, right. He played Bland Guy #2 on that unfunny, repetitive, played out cash grab that only the most boring people alive watched in earnest.

I'm sure Keanu Reeves cares a lot.
 
2022-10-25 9:39:18 PM  

Nicki Minaj's Cousin's Friend's Swollen Testicle: BlackCloudofDespair: You were always the most annoying Friend

Have you erased Ross from your memory and if so please share how?


Ross at least had a character story to fit with his manic and instrusive behavior(wife leaving him, high school crush falling apart), Chandler was just a whiner.

Anyway, Perry is mad that despite giving the Prime Minister swirlies in junior high nobody wants to pay any attention to him and this is probably his way of stirring up publicity.  Not that Reeves will care, he'll be too busy feeding birds or talking wu-shu movies with some bar flies.
 
2022-10-25 9:42:16 PM  

Redh8t: Wait, you think Matthew Perry is straight?


In theory, probably not in practice much since he turned into an odious pelican holding a sour fish in his bill.

I've never heard he was gay.  But I don't care enough to remember if I had.  I'd remember if he got farked up and raped a motorcycle until he burned his junk off on the exhaust pipe.  I'd remember that forever.
 
2022-10-25 9:59:15 PM  
Colon burst because he is so full of shiat, addicts die, generally no one's fault, calling them free when they were a slave to a drug is amusing.  The reality is everytime he says Keanu he is using it for himself, probably guilt from his own continued existence when those he considered better than himself died
 
2022-10-25 10:06:04 PM  

WhippingBoi: Redh8t: Wait, you think Matthew Perry is straight?

I don't think about him at all.


You f*ckin well do!
You're in this thread ain'tcha?
 
2022-10-25 10:09:28 PM  
Gotta think there's some context missing from this, but let's just go with knee jerk reactions based on a Page Six "article."
 
2022-10-25 10:12:40 PM  
That's not a clever quip like he thinks it is, just makes him sound like an asshole.
 
2022-10-25 10:17:52 PM  

Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: Gotta think there's some context missing from this, but let's just go with knee jerk reactions based on a Page Six "article."


There was some rumors like in 2007 that they'd dated briefly. And given that Perry got friendzoned by Aniston, that could certainly have been a catalyst. Or maybe Keanu cut him off at the DMV, or he wasn't a fan of Bill and Ted's, or Freaked and Ortiz the Dog Faced Boy.
 
2022-10-25 10:19:57 PM  
If MP killed himself I'd consider it his best work.
 
2022-10-25 10:23:02 PM  

TheCubsFan: That's not a clever quip like he thinks it is, just makes him sound like an asshole.


I don't think 'sounds like' is necessary here. He's sort of in a mode where he's trying to claw back into the limelight, and negative attention is going to be OK for him. I mean, there was Keanu, Steve Buscemi, Hugh Jackman, or Tom Hanks to go after, and I think that Perry knows that he isn't in Hanks or Jackman's weight class.
 
2022-10-25 10:28:38 PM  
If it's really the tale ted that go down, it explains why Matthew Perry is still around.
 
2022-10-25 10:31:11 PM  

Porous Horace: If MP killed himself I'd consider it his best work.


He'd phone this in too and we'd end up hearing about him in a coma ad nauseum, ad infinitum.
 
2022-10-25 10:39:05 PM  

Flappyhead: Nicki Minaj's Cousin's Friend's Swollen Testicle: BlackCloudofDespair: You were always the most annoying Friend

Have you erased Ross from your memory and if so please share how?

Ross at least had a character story to fit with his manic and instrusive behavior(wife leaving him, high school crush falling apart), Chandler was just a whiner.

Anyway, Perry is mad that despite giving the Prime Minister swirlies in junior high nobody wants to pay any attention to him and this is probably his way of stirring up publicity.  Not that Reeves will care, he'll be too busy feeding birds or talking wu-shu movies with some bar flies.


My problem with Friends is that Joey and Chandler's apartment should constantly be occupied by one or another hot actress-wanna-be that Joey is banging.  He had so few woman around him he had to be closeted.
 
2022-10-25 11:21:24 PM  

hubiestubert: But to be hating on Keanue is like hating Elvira.


Heh, do I have terrible news for you...
https://www.queerty.com/cassandra-peterson-reveals-lost-demographic-coming-20220106
 
2022-10-25 11:45:13 PM  
Friends always sucked
 
2022-10-26 12:03:31 AM  

king of vegas: Matthew Perry has not aged well.


He didn't young well either.
 
2022-10-26 12:04:37 AM  

Porous Horace: If MP killed himself I'd consider it his best work.


He tried with 55 Vicodin a day and still failed.
 
2022-10-26 12:15:51 AM  

fredirc: hubiestubert: But to be hating on Keanue is like hating Elvira.

Heh, do I have terrible news for you...
https://www.queerty.com/cassandra-peterson-reveals-lost-demographic-coming-20220106


So bigots hate Keanu?  Not seeing the problem.
 
2022-10-26 12:24:01 AM  
If true, this article just makes Matthew Perry sound like a bitter, total piece of shiat.

I mean, he probably is. He's famous for one character, and nobody really cares if they see him in anything ever again. But he sounds like it too.
 
2022-10-26 12:24:34 AM  
What a strange & sad grudge to bear
 
2022-10-26 12:26:16 AM  

king of vegas: Matthew Perry has not aged well.


he is one chinless motherfarker.

is it possible to have negative chin?
 
2022-10-26 12:38:11 AM  
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Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-10-26 12:43:44 AM  
This is a tabloid writing tabloid shiat calling up bullshiat that Perry wrote when he was in his most drug addled and most miserable self after a friend died. Don't buy into the clickbait.
 
2022-10-26 1:09:38 AM  

The Exit Stencilist: Keanu is massively more entertaining to watch than Perry ever has or will be, and makes a shiat ton more money

If not for Friends, would Mathew Perry even be a name?


Well, I'm not so sure about that last part.  The residuals they all still get from streaming and syndication of Friends is farking insane.  But Keanu is and will be remembered for a bunch of different roles in a career that has spanned three decades and counting.  Perry will only ever be remembered as Chandler.

And yeah, I get it, Keanu has never been the best actor.  He's good at playing particular roles but his range is limited.  You want to insult his acting or his movies, that's fair game.  But to imply it's some sort of injustice that he's still alive?  That's really farking harsh even if you don't know someone personally, but by pretty much all accounts Keanu is a genuinely good person.  And he thinks it's unfair that this good person is still walking around being a good person after his friend died of a drug overdose?  fark you.
 
2022-10-26 1:10:29 AM  
Yo Courtney, is this Matt guy bothering you?
 
2022-10-26 1:22:48 AM  

Jake Havechek: Reeves gives more money to charity than this dickweed will ever earn.


He's out of line of course. And I wouldn't doubt Keanu has more money. But this dude is fark you rich and he probably will be forever.
 
2022-10-26 1:24:26 AM  

Redh8t: WhippingBoi: Redh8t: Wait, you think Matthew Perry is straight?

I don't think about him at all.

You f*ckin well do!
You're in this thread ain'tcha?


I imagine he's like all the rest of us, "I don't think about him at all...until I saw his name just now then, of course, I'll think of him.". Do you often randomly think about Matthew Perry? Like a lot? Are YOU Matthew Perry?
 
2022-10-26 1:27:33 AM  
"original thinkers"...?

Go back to rehab, man.
 
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