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(ESPN)   In a battle of 2-2 AFC North teams, will it be the Bengals or the Ravens? Joe Burrow or Lamar Jackson? Would you like some orange or purple with your black? Cincinnati chili or crab cakes? The game is at 8:20 PM ET on NBC   (espn.com) divider line
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    More: Live, Miami Dolphins, National Football League, single moment, Cincinnati Bengals, joint statement, short pass, Tua Tagovailoa's apparent head injury, English-language films  
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497 clicks; posted to Discussion » and Sports » on 09 Oct 2022 at 7:45 PM (24 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



516 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | » | Newest | Show all

 
kdawg7736 [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-08 9:16:28 PM  
Don't like the Ravens, so Cincy for all except for crab cakes.
 
null [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-08 10:33:41 PM  
Team Medium Meteor
 
bluorangefyre [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 11:23:03 AM  

null: Team Medium Meteor


Team Giant Sinkhole!

/since you took my team

/Have you ever tried playing hopscotch in a spacesuit? It's quite the experience
 
puffy999 [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 4:39:01 PM  
Go tie!
 
seventypercent [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 6:04:20 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 7:33:28 PM  
Still possible to get the day thread to 2008.
 
ariseatex [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:33:58 PM  
I have two friends going to this one.  One has season tickets, his family has since the Ravens moved to Baltimore.  The other bought a solo ticket, going with no friends, but will be sitting in the stands in his Bengals jersey, likely surrounded by Ravens fans.  I'll miss him.
 
ariseatex [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:42:43 PM  
Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.
 
ariseatex [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:43:11 PM  

ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today. I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.


Might help if I actually added the farking link (now above).
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 7:44:16 PM  

ariseatex: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today. I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

Might help if I actually added the farking link (now above).


I mean, have you never seen a guy jerk off another guy? I thought I knew you.

/ready for my closeup
 
puffy999 [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 7:44:37 PM  

ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.


He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub
 
ZMugg [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 7:46:21 PM  

jaylectricity: ariseatex: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today. I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

Might help if I actually added the farking link (now above).

I mean, have you never seen a guy jerk off another guy? I thought I knew you.


Looks like a 'Dutch Rudder' to me, too.
 
Olympic Trolling Judge
2022-10-09 7:54:24 PM  
My apologies for missing the day thread, but I'm here now, you little shiats.

Should be a good game. Control of the AFC North on the line after Brissett pulled a Russell Wilson. The Ravens are only favored by 3, so there's a fair chance I'll get to exercise my WHO DEY muscles tonight.
 
phimuskapsi [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:55:23 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
ariseatex [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:57:04 PM  

jaylectricity: ariseatex: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today. I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

Might help if I actually added the farking link (now above).

I mean, have you never seen a guy jerk off another guy? I thought I knew you.


I've done it enough to know that if you're doing it overhand like he was, your arm is going to tire a long time before you get the other guy off.  Keep your upper arms by your torso, approach from the same height, you'll last a lot longer.

/game hasn't even started and I'm already giving handjob advice.  Welcome to Fark, everyone!
 
Hillbilly Jim
2022-10-09 7:57:04 PM  

jaylectricity: Still possible to get the day thread to 2008.


I did my part
 
bionicjoe [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:57:59 PM  

Olympic Trolling Judge: My apologies for missing the day thread, but I'm here now, you little shiats.

Should be a good game. Control of the AFC North on the line after Brissett pulled a Russell Wilson. The Ravens are only favored by 3, so there's a fair chance I'll get to exercise my WHO DEY muscles tonight.


May a La Rosa light shine upon the Skyline of the Queen City!
A hearty WHO DEY to you, sir!

Howdy to the rest of y'all!
 
Ethertap [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 7:58:54 PM  

puffy999: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub


It isn't, trust me.
 
bionicjoe [OhFark]
2022-10-09 7:59:33 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
phimuskapsi [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:00:03 PM  
Ariel Helwani finally makes it to a Bills Home Game, been a fan for decades:

https://twitter.com/arielhelwani/status/1579096745383821312

Cool bunch of posts on his feed.
 
Ethertap [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:00:13 PM  
With any luck this game will end in a 2-2 tie.
 
TheJoe03
2022-10-09 8:00:19 PM  
The Ravens were always my favorite team that wasn't my actual team growing up so I guess go Ravens!
 
Hillbilly Jim
2022-10-09 8:01:22 PM  

puffy999: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub


Icy hot in the jockstrap was the varsity wrestling team "initiation" when I was sophomore in high school. I put a stop to that shiat.
 
Galileo's Daughter
2022-10-09 8:03:59 PM  

bluorangefyre: null: Team Medium Meteor

Team Giant Sinkhole!

/since you took my team


Team Why Not Both?
 
OkieDookie [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:05:49 PM  

Galileo's Daughter: bluorangefyre: null: Team Medium Meteor

Team Giant Sinkhole!

/since you took my team

Team Why Not Both?


Go inexplicable tar pit?
 
TheManofPA
2022-10-09 8:07:38 PM  
Ok, this Simpsons episode watching before the games is insane. Definitely hope it continues its setup.
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:12:07 PM  
Lost every bet today.

I'm bad at this.
 
Adolf Oliver Nipples [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:13:56 PM  
Time for fake HOOKER BOOTS and goofing on Collinsworth!
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:14:10 PM  
I threw another $10 at Cincinatti winning and the over. Let's see if that gets me back close to even for the day.
 
phimuskapsi [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:14:47 PM  

jaylectricity: Lost every bet today.

I'm bad at this.


Drinking all day probably doesn't help lol. 

I won 2. One for $28 and one for $215, but I hadn't won for a couple weekends. If I get streaky losses I take time off.
 
OkieDookie [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:14:52 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Time for fake HOOKER BOOTS and goofing on Collinsworth!


Fark user imageView Full Size
Cris Collinsworth.
 
puffy999 [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:15:57 PM  

jaylectricity: Lost every bet today.

I'm bad at this.


But are you as bad as Russell Wilson is at everything right now?
 
Olympic Trolling Judge
2022-10-09 8:16:00 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Time for fake HOOKER BOOTS and goofing on Collinsworth!


Hey man. How you holdin' up?
 
Adolf Oliver Nipples [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:16:01 PM  

Hillbilly Jim: puffy999: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub

Icy hot in the jockstrap was the varsity wrestling team "initiation" when I was sophomore in high school. I put a stop to that shiat.


One of the myriad crimes displayed in Revenge of the Nerds. Seriously, if any of that movie were real everyone in it would be just now getting paroled if they hadn't received a life sentence.
 
seventypercent [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:16:12 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
Hillbilly Jim
2022-10-09 8:16:42 PM  

jaylectricity: I threw another $10 at Cincinatti winning and the over. Let's see if that gets me back close to even for the day.


First half over, it's 23.5
 
ariseatex [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:16:56 PM  
Cris Collinsworth Drunk-O-Meter: 9 (out of 10)

He's back to form, folks!
 
Bunny Deville [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:17:09 PM  
Go Cincy! Cat team brotherhood!
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:17:14 PM  

phimuskapsi: jaylectricity: Lost every bet today.

I'm bad at this.

Drinking all day probably doesn't help lol. 

I won 2. One for $28 and one for $215, but I hadn't won for a couple weekends. If I get streaky losses I take time off.


I think I made the bets before drinking all day. But I woke up almost drunk. So whatever.
 
Galileo's Daughter
2022-10-09 8:18:30 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: One of the myriad crimes displayed in Revenge of the Nerds. Seriously, if any of that movie were real everyone in it would be just now getting paroled if they hadn't received a life sentence.


Legal Eagle did an episode about that movie, which was funny when it came out, but it's aged like milk.
 
puffy999 [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:18:43 PM  
Watching that Arizona kick near the end of the Eagles game:

reactiongifs.meView Full Size
 
phimuskapsi [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:18:52 PM  
By the way, Josh's second pass to Davis for a TD?

65-air yards.

https://twitter.com/JohnnySaigon/status/1579230379965583360

Longest in the league last couple years is in that ball park.
 
Recoil Therapy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:19:11 PM  

puffy999: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub


You know how they break capsules of ammonia under their noses?  This is similar, it helps you wake up and focus.

/perhaps not focusing on the game, but you 'will' be focused...
 
Hillbilly Jim
2022-10-09 8:19:46 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Hillbilly Jim: puffy999: ariseatex: Okay, kinda NSFW, so I'll just link it, but...

I've seen this almost a hundred times today.  I keep trying to figure out what he's actually doing.  I keep looking for an explanation for what he's actually doing.  I can't find ANY explanation.

The only things I can think of that would resemble that movement in any way would not require Holmes to have his ass hanging out.

I know I should just laugh and move on, but...I can't.  I gotta know what really happened now.

He's rubbing a quad or thigh I think, maybe with a topical pain reliever.

/or his dick, I dunno, but I doubt icy hot is a good dick rub

Icy hot in the jockstrap was the varsity wrestling team "initiation" when I was sophomore in high school. I put a stop to that shiat.

One of the myriad crimes displayed in Revenge of the Nerds. Seriously, if any of that movie were real everyone in it would be just now getting paroled if they hadn't received a life sentence.


A broken nose stopped it when they went after a 95 lb freshmen. Coach came in because of the scrum and just nodded, never said a word.
 
OkieDookie [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:20:13 PM  

ariseatex: Cris Collinsworth Drunk-O-Meter: 9 (out of 10)

He's back to form, folks!


The striped helmets bring back bad memories for him.
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:20:53 PM  

phimuskapsi: air yards


I pointed out this phrase earlier. Trust me, everybody is going to hear that phrase every week now.
 
Adolf Oliver Nipples [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:22:05 PM  

Olympic Trolling Judge: Adolf Oliver Nipples: Time for fake HOOKER BOOTS and goofing on Collinsworth!

Hey man. How you holdin' up?


Between today and work I'm utterly miserable. One of my employees/coworkers sent me a text this afternoon saying that she would no longer work weekends because it's "too chaotic" for her. Well, as the scheduler, I have three options: first, tell her that's too bad and schedule her anyway, which risks her quitting or simply not showing up, second, I can ruin what little remains of my life and do it myself, or third, I can tell the boss what's up and he can rage at me because somehow it will be my fault. I have enough trouble filling weekends without this bullshiat. Everybody makes it my problem. It's exhausting.

All I do for fun anymore is football. Three hours a week. That's all I ask. Today was no fun at all.

So now I get to do the schedule. And then hang myself.
 
Quivering Moist
2022-10-09 8:22:47 PM  
Hey all y'alls!

media1.giphy.comView Full Size
 
jaylectricity [TotalFark]
2022-10-09 8:22:51 PM  
Oh yeah, sure...the Ravens will suddenly not blow leads.
 
phimuskapsi [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-10-09 8:23:45 PM  

jaylectricity: phimuskapsi: air yards

I pointed out this phrase earlier. Trust me, everybody is going to hear that phrase every week now.


Well, it's the way to describe the pass. Another way of putting it is that Josh had a 75 yard pass TD with 10 yards YAC.
 
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