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(The Sun)   "I'm ready to leave my husband for my lover. Should I tell my husband?" (possible nsfw content on page)   (thesun.co.uk) divider line
    More: Awkward, The Sun, bad guy, Newspaper, News of the World, The Times, Marriage, DEAR DEIDRE, News Corporation  
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404 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 07 Oct 2022 at 9:05 AM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



28 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-10-07 9:10:00 AM  
"It's not you, it's me".
He'll understand.
 
2022-10-07 9:12:11 AM  
I'm sure he will figure it out when you stop coming home.  Why be considerate now?
 
2022-10-07 9:20:26 AM  

debug: I'm sure he will figure it out when you stop coming home.  Why be considerate now?


Yeah.

"He seems to be under the impression he still had a wife, so..."

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2022-10-07 9:22:49 AM  
I initially thought that this could have been written by my first, cheating wife.  Then I got to the part about her commute, which probably means that the letter writer has a job.

That eliminated the possibility that it was my first wife.
 
2022-10-07 9:24:51 AM  

debug: I'm sure he will figure it out when you stop coming home.  Why be considerate now?


My thought was "I have to think he's going to notice, whether you tell him or not..."
 
2022-10-07 9:24:57 AM  
Once upon a time the person who made the graphics for Deirdre needed some Photoshop skills. Now it's a flunky who drops stock photography into pink and blue templates and tarts it up with clip art.
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"This thing needs question marks. Maybe a lipstick print and a speak-no-evil monkey at jaunty angles to fill in the trapped space. There. Now it's perfect. One down, eight hundred to go."
 
2022-10-07 10:10:05 AM  
you already made your choice. stop lying. he already knows.
 
2022-10-07 10:26:39 AM  
We ended up back at his place, with the intention of having a nightcap. sex

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2022-10-07 10:31:53 AM  
Overlapping relationships with no time between is a recipe for success!
 
2022-10-07 10:44:59 AM  
Plus, I want to give us a proper shot and he feels the same.

He'll dump you in less that a month. Won't hurt him at all, he can always find another mark on the bus, but your life will be upended.
 
2022-10-07 11:07:44 AM  
Explain to your lover you need some time apart to make a final decision.
Then talk to your husband, explain you need to relight the spark between you because you are seriously unhappy.


This will never work. She's already checked out. Nothing they do to try and rekindle their relationship is going to be as enticing as the memory/fantasy of the new guy. End it, move out, and be done with it. If you're already at the point where you flinch when he touches you, just move on
 
2022-10-07 11:12:35 AM  
I think if you just go he'll figure it out.
 
2022-10-07 11:20:39 AM  
No. Just GTFO. He'll be better off without you.
 
2022-10-07 11:39:36 AM  
Tell him you're heading to the sex store to pick up a few things and never return home
 
2022-10-07 12:56:45 PM  

NateAsbestos: debug: I'm sure he will figure it out when you stop coming home.  Why be considerate now?

My thought was "I have to think he's going to notice, whether you tell him or not..."


Dear Financial Times;

Every Tuesday my wife and I go out to dinner for date night. I was reviewing credit card statements for the last two months and they were about half of what they used to be. Any idea what changed?
 
2022-10-07 2:48:17 PM  
Yes.  He'll be so relieved that he won't have to pay alimony, you cheating homewrecker.
 
2022-10-07 3:14:47 PM  
Yes you should absolutely tell your husband that you are cheating whore.
 
2022-10-07 4:38:57 PM  

wage0048: Yes.  He'll be so relieved that he won't have to pay alimony, you cheating homewrecker.


Is that necessarily the case?
 
2022-10-07 5:17:01 PM  
Deidre is sending missed messages:

Give your marriage a chance .....

...... sending you my Thinking About Divorce support pack
 
2022-10-07 5:18:35 PM  
*mixed

/Damn you autocarrot
 
2022-10-07 6:21:43 PM  

miscreant: Explain to your lover you need some time apart to make a final decision.
Then talk to your husband, explain you need to relight the spark between you because you are seriously unhappy.

This will never work. She's already checked out. Nothing they do to try and rekindle their relationship is going to be as enticing as the memory/fantasy of the new guy. End it, move out, and be done with it. If you're already at the point where you flinch when he touches you, just move on


Well said. It is possible that she can step back but I think we are Gollum at Mount Doom level PoNR
 
2022-10-07 6:29:21 PM  

Cheron: NateAsbestos: debug: I'm sure he will figure it out when you stop coming home.  Why be considerate now?

My thought was "I have to think he's going to notice, whether you tell him or not..."

Dear Financial Times;

Every Tuesday my wife and I go out to dinner for date night. I was reviewing credit card statements for the last two months and they were about half of what they used to be. Any idea what changed?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-10-07 10:19:09 PM  
You just open the gate, Kate
Make a new plan, Fran
You don't need to be coy, Joy
Just get yourself free
 
2022-10-08 12:34:45 AM  

miscreant: Explain to your lover you need some time apart to make a final decision.
Then talk to your husband, explain you need to relight the spark between you because you are seriously unhappy.

This will never work. She's already checked out. Nothing they do to try and rekindle their relationship is going to be as enticing as the memory/fantasy of the new guy. End it, move out, and be done with it. If you're already at the point where you flinch when he touches you, just move on


Yep, in my experience when a woman is done all trying to work it out does is prolong everyone's agony.
 
2022-10-08 1:20:07 PM  

wage0048: Yes.  He'll be so relieved that he won't have to pay alimony, you cheating homewrecker.


Let's use an analogy:

You got a new job. It's you and the owner, selling art supplies. You keep chugging along, you get along, and the paychecks roll in. He keeps talking about expanding the business and giving you a raise.

Then seven years pass. None of that happened. He dumps all the work on you and just watches YouTube videos and chats with friends. No raise, no expansion. No support.

Is it unethical to get a new job?
 
2022-10-08 1:53:43 PM  

The Sophian Church: wage0048: Yes.  He'll be so relieved that he won't have to pay alimony, you cheating homewrecker.

Let's use an analogy:

You got a new job. It's you and the owner, selling art supplies. You keep chugging along, you get along, and the paychecks roll in. He keeps talking about expanding the business and giving you a raise.

Then seven years pass. None of that happened. He dumps all the work on you and just watches YouTube videos and chats with friends. No raise, no expansion. No support.

Is it unethical to get a new job?


It is unethical to be working at the new job while you're still on your old job's hours, pay, and benefits.
 
2022-10-08 6:28:23 PM  

Fano: The Sophian Church: wage0048: Yes.  He'll be so relieved that he won't have to pay alimony, you cheating homewrecker.

Let's use an analogy:

You got a new job. It's you and the owner, selling art supplies. You keep chugging along, you get along, and the paychecks roll in. He keeps talking about expanding the business and giving you a raise.

Then seven years pass. None of that happened. He dumps all the work on you and just watches YouTube videos and chats with friends. No raise, no expansion. No support.

Is it unethical to get a new job?

It is unethical to be working at the new job while you're still on your old job's hours, pay, and benefits.


That's also a good time to find out if your boss gives enough of a sh*t to fire you or if he'll improve conditions at work.
 
2022-10-08 6:58:51 PM  
Your lover is having sex with a women who then has to go home. I'm sure he'll be thrilled to pick up all the duties that you're leaving your husband for not doing.
 
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