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(Law and Crime)   If your "financial advisor" suddenly suggests you take out a large life insurance policy payable to investment accounts you let him control? Yeah, maybe don't do that   (lawandcrime.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Fraud, Keith Todd Ashley, Police, Murder, long-beleaguered former owner, United States, Dallas, federal court  
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2143 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Oct 2022 at 12:41 AM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



20 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-10-07 12:43:05 AM  
that man looks farking nuts.

how do you look at him and think he's the one to manage your future.
 
2022-10-07 12:44:00 AM  
Is that a mugshot or a selfie? Either way he seems upset he got caught.
 
2022-10-07 12:52:00 AM  

Raider_dad: Is that a mugshot or a selfie? Either way he seems upset he got caught.


Uhhh - yeah - I see that look from someone coming at me I'm gonna assume there's attempted murder in the future with me in a starring role as the Victim #7
 
2022-10-07 1:00:12 AM  
My financial advisor has suggested that I invest heavily in Google Play Cards. Took me a couple of days to move my portfolio to them because most stores asked if I was being scammed and would only sell $1,000 worth at each convenience store I bought them from but I have been assured that my retirement plan is safe and will double next week

/ if anyone asks you to buy gift cards to pay for anything, this is a scam. Do not do this
 
2022-10-07 1:04:25 AM  
Can you type slower please? I'm trying to take notes.
 
2022-10-07 1:05:40 AM  

johnny queso: that man looks farking nuts...how do you look at him and think he's the one to manage your future.


How do you tell him he's not the one to manage your future?
 
2022-10-07 1:07:38 AM  
Ashley was indicted in Dallas County for the murder of one of his clients, 62-year-old James "Jim" Seegan, who was also a close friend, in April 2021.

Apparently not that close.
 
2022-10-07 1:11:52 AM  
I remember when my mother tried to take out multiple life insurance policies on #6.  They got divorced shortly afterwards.  She claimed she had become a lesbian in San Francisco, but nope--#7 was a pretty cool guy.  She used him up, too.  He's dead now, ostensibly from natural causes, though I suspect he was an early Covid death... cold acquired at the VA hospital, rapid decompensation ending in death about about a week later.
 
2022-10-07 1:12:21 AM  
The unsigned purported suicide note was also a bit more than odd, with the last sentence reading: "My last friend Keith Ashley will help you with 972-658-6113."

Protip: Don't leave your contact information at the crime scene
 
2022-10-07 1:23:21 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: Raider_dad: Is that a mugshot or a selfie? Either way he seems upset he got caught.

Uhhh - yeah - I see that look from someone coming at me I'm gonna assume there's attempted murder in the future with me in a starring role as the Victim #7


That's a face with a message. And the message is "Draw. Crush grip. Aim for the belt buckle. Let muzzle rise stitch him from crotch to cranium."
 
2022-10-07 2:53:34 AM  
So, in the overlap of insurance and philosophy, the topic of moral hazard comes up. In theory I could buy a policy on a stranger. But modern regulations mean I have to have a fiscal relationship with the individual. Being able to buy insurance for a group of individuals who I might murder means I have to murder more than I spent to insure.
 
2022-10-07 3:30:03 AM  

Raider_dad: Is that a mugshot or a selfie? Either way he seems upset he got caught.


It's a cropped full torso dick pic while wearing only a t-shirt and raping you with his eyes.
 
2022-10-07 3:46:15 AM  
I just tried to post a image and it said "Sh&t" and it failed, I am still surprised FARK blocks that word.

So you get this one.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-10-07 7:31:55 AM  

wildcardjack: So, in the overlap of insurance and philosophy, the topic of moral hazard comes up. In theory I could buy a policy on a stranger. But modern regulations mean I have to have a fiscal relationship with the individual. Being able to buy insurance for a group of individuals who I might murder means I have to murder more than I spent to insure.


That's what employees are for.
 
2022-10-07 7:41:01 AM  

Weatherkiss: Ashley was indicted in Dallas County for the murder of one of his clients, 62-year-old James "Jim" Seegan, who was also a close friend, in April 2021.

Apparently not that close.


You're more likely to be victimized by a relative or friend than a complete stranger, so it actually tracks
 
2022-10-07 7:41:31 AM  

TorpedoOrca: My financial advisor has suggested that I invest heavily in Google Play Cards. Took me a couple of days to move my portfolio to them because most stores asked if I was being scammed and would only sell $1,000 worth at each convenience store I bought them from but I have been assured that my retirement plan is safe and will double next week

/ if anyone asks you to buy gift cards to pay for anything, this is a scam. Do not do this


And yet still a better return than the stock market right now..

/the only one who should be paying in gift cards cards is ken paxton.. "sheets" cards i think..
 
2022-10-07 8:35:46 AM  
The long-beleaguered former owner of Nine Band Brewing, a since-shuttered boutique beer manufacturer that used the armadillo, a non-native mammal related to anteaters and sloths that has nevertheless become a major fixture in Lone Star State lore, on its logo.

"We need you to write up an article about this con artist and murderer who's on trial. Think you can stay on topic and not go off on any tangents indulging your weird vendetta against armadillos?"

"No promises."
 
2022-10-07 9:44:53 AM  

wildcardjack: So, in the overlap of insurance and philosophy, the topic of moral hazard comes up. In theory I could buy a policy on a stranger. But modern regulations mean I have to have a fiscal relationship with the individual. Being able to buy insurance for a group of individuals who I might murder means I have to murder more than I spent to insure.


In legal terms you have to have "an insurable interest" in the property or person you are buying insurance for (so I can't buy home insurance on YOUR house (because of the temptation to burn it down to cash in)  e, and large companies like Walmart can't buy life insurance for their low level employees, aka "dead peasant policies "( for obvious reasons as well)

The exception to this, is of course Wall Street, where you can 'insure" nearly anything of the derivatives market, even if you have no connection to it.   '08 was largely a result fo Goldman Sachs buying insurance on the financial health of certain companies and then using their power to essentially "burn them down" to collect on the "insurance"
 
2022-10-07 12:16:18 PM  
In my country, Texas mess with you
 
2022-10-07 1:13:14 PM  

EdgeRunner: The long-beleaguered former owner of Nine Band Brewing, a since-shuttered boutique beer manufacturer that used the armadillo, a non-native mammal related to anteaters and sloths that has nevertheless become a major fixture in Lone Star State lore, on its logo.

"We need you to write up an article about this con artist and murderer who's on trial. Think you can stay on topic and not go off on any tangents indulging your weird vendetta against armadillos?"

"No promises."


It's complicated, he was dating an armadillo for years before she left him and took the baby, he's been a bitter bastard ever since.  Sometimes she sends him pictures of his son, but he still misses that 'ittle face

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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