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(Minnesota Reformer)   Another Republican candidate caught making ads about his four combat deployments which were so classified nobody know about them   (minnesotareformer.com) divider line
    More: Fail, Military, Republican candidate Tyler Kistner, Service record, Iraq War, Military base, Combat, Military of the United States, military records  
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3243 clicks; posted to Politics » on 05 Oct 2022 at 3:05 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-10-05 12:33:44 PM  
During a January 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said he put his enemy "six feet under."
"I pushed some asshole down an open manhole."

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've been on the wrong end of a loaded weapon."
"I forgot to unload my weapon while I was cleaning it."

In an April 2020 virtual town gall with the Minnesota Young Republicans, Kistner referred to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq and said, "I've been in such conflicts."
"I've called my middle-eastern neighbour racist things because his dog shiat on my lawn.  He's probably a terrorist anyway."

During a February 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said, "I've been in fights, I've been in combat. I know exactly what it's gonna take."
"I punched my middle-eastern neighbour in the face because his dog wouldn't stop shiatting on my lawn."

In October 2020, during a Voice of India Community Town Hall, Kistner said, "As a veteran, I deployed to the front lines six months at a time, and my family was back in this country."
"I've been to the front of the line in the mess tent.  That counts, right?"

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've had guns drawn on me overseas in defense of our nation."
"Some thugs in northern Africa tried to mug me.  I told them America could kick their shiathole country's ass.  One of them drew a gun and said, 'America isn't here right now.'  I wet myself."
 
2022-10-05 12:35:55 PM  
"Even basic details could help foreign adversaries and put other service members at risk."

HAHAHAHAHAHA oh wow...

I hate him.
 
2022-10-05 1:01:40 PM  
The Congressional Leadership Fund said it shipped an "incorrect version of the ad and fixed it ourselves on the same day."

media.tenor.comView Full Size



media.tenor.comView Full Size

"incorrect version"
 
2022-10-05 1:38:04 PM  
So, an REMF decided to steal some glory after coasting his deployment behind a desk stamping paperwork?

Sounds on brand.
 
2022-10-05 2:26:56 PM  
Lie about your service
fark you
Being proud you were admin with an honorable record, yeah, I respect that

My dad got out in 63, he was basically running the PX and Slop House on Okinawa, lots of stories about Hurricane Fifths and the like.

You gonna say he wasn't a "real marine"
 
2022-10-05 2:57:02 PM  

baka-san: Lie about your service
fark you
Being proud you were admin with an honorable record, yeah, I respect that

My dad got out in 63, he was basically running the PX and Slop House on Okinawa, lots of stories about Hurricane Fifths and the like.

You gonna say he wasn't a "real marine"


When you do it for beer or to get laid... whatever... But when you do it to run for elected office or steal from people? It's the lowest form of scum.
 
2022-10-05 3:07:05 PM  
I used to fly with VQ2. If we saw combat, it's because we done f*cked up.
Fixed wing recon. We're not supposed to be seen.
 
2022-10-05 3:07:28 PM  
10% of the time it works 100% of the time.
 
2022-10-05 3:08:47 PM  
We really need to get over fetishizing military service. It's a job. It's a dangerous job, but it's still a job. Crab fishing is a dangerous job but no one is going around sucking the fishermen's dicks over it
 
2022-10-05 3:08:52 PM  

Psychopusher: During a January 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said he put his enemy "six feet under."
"I pushed some asshole down an open manhole."

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've been on the wrong end of a loaded weapon."
"I forgot to unload my weapon while I was cleaning it."

In an April 2020 virtual town gall with the Minnesota Young Republicans, Kistner referred to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq and said, "I've been in such conflicts."
"I've called my middle-eastern neighbour racist things because his dog shiat on my lawn.  He's probably a terrorist anyway."

During a February 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said, "I've been in fights, I've been in combat. I know exactly what it's gonna take."
"I punched my middle-eastern neighbour in the face because his dog wouldn't stop shiatting on my lawn."

In October 2020, during a Voice of India Community Town Hall, Kistner said, "As a veteran, I deployed to the front lines six months at a time, and my family was back in this country."
"I've been to the front of the line in the mess tent.  That counts, right?"

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've had guns drawn on me overseas in defense of our nation."
"Some thugs in northern Africa tried to mug me.  I told them America could kick their shiathole country's ass.  One of them drew a gun and said, 'America isn't here right now.'  I wet myself."


"Prolly a terrierist" was right there.
/Prolly only funny to me
 
2022-10-05 3:08:58 PM  
I never in a million years thought that the soldier humping GQP would turn on the military for their own gain.
 
2022-10-05 3:10:19 PM  
These are the same people who shiat on John Kerry's Purple Hearts and mock Pete Buttigieg for  volunteering to serve.
 
2022-10-05 3:10:41 PM  
Republicans always lie.
 
2022-10-05 3:11:25 PM  
Stolen Valor is part of the standard GQP playbook now, seemingly.

Watch the hypocrisy of who defends him, I bet.
 
2022-10-05 3:11:49 PM  
Been going on for years

Oregon Congressman Wes Cooley

Yup, R
 
2022-10-05 3:12:20 PM  

hervatski: I never in a million years thought that the soldier humping GQP would turn on the military for their own gain.


But why not? Because it's been obvious from the start who and what the Republicans have become.
None of this should surprise you.
 
2022-10-05 3:12:40 PM  
You would think Repubs, who abhor Stolen Valor and worship the military, would be slapping the shiat out of these guys, but.
 
2022-10-05 3:12:42 PM  

YakBoy42: We really need to get over fetishizing military service. It's a job. It's a dangerous job, but it's still a job. Crab fishing is a dangerous job but no one is going around sucking the fishermen's dicks over it


Must... resist... 'your.... mother'... joke
 
2022-10-05 3:12:59 PM  
Back when i was fighting in the revolutionary war we used to take fakers like this and hang them up by their toes.
 
2022-10-05 3:15:04 PM  

fiddlehead: You would think Repubs, who abhor Stolen Valor and worship the military, would be slapping the shiat out of these guys, but.


Republicans will never hold one of their own accountable. I mean... they're all defending flat out treason, espionage and insurrection. Not to mention rape, and forcing women to birth corpses.

Defending a bit of stolen valor isn't going to be a problem.
 
2022-10-05 3:16:27 PM  
Hey, don't believe the fake news media here, guys... I should know, I served with this guy back when we were soldiers in the Core. We fought to take back Gitmo from Charlie, and also helped bomb Pearl Harbor to show the krauts what for. We're true 'merikin heroes, and you are disrespecting that!
 
2022-10-05 3:16:53 PM  

hervatski: I never in a million years thought that the soldier humping GQP would turn on the military for their own gain.


I know.  They're always so consistent with their messages.  Like when they say they're fiscally responsible and give 2 trillion dollars to rich people and corporations.  Or when they say they're pro-family while cheating on the mistress they're cheating on their wife with.  Or when they say they're anti-abortion, but then they have or pay for abortions.  Or when they say they follow the teachings of Jesus Christ and then do almost anything Jesus said don't do, or don't do just about anything He said they should do.
 
2022-10-05 3:17:44 PM  

chewd: Back when i was fighting in the revolutionary war we used to take fakers like this and hang them up by their toes.


I hear what you're saying. I was the tail gunner in George Washington's bomber squadron. I'm glad TFG finally recognized our sacrifice. God Bless our Merica. Land of the feeb.
 
2022-10-05 3:17:46 PM  
Anyone who serves, she said, "is definitely someone to be admired."

LOL
 
2022-10-05 3:18:16 PM  

hubiestubert: So, an REMF decided to steal some glory after coasting his deployment behind a desk stamping paperwork?

Sounds on brand.


What's really frustrating is that the Ukraine War should have taught people about the importance of the guys serving behind the front line.  Seal Team 6 Special Green Delta Beret Forces can't do squat without a whole pile of people making sure they have food, fuel, bullets, working helicopters....

Forget that and you end up looking like Russia.

/Oh, yeah
 
2022-10-05 3:20:57 PM  

YakBoy42: Crab fishing is a dangerous job but no one is going around sucking the fishermen's dicks over it


Goddammit I have to update my Indeed profile again.
 
2022-10-05 3:22:23 PM  

eKonk: Hey, don't believe the fake news media here, guys... I should know, I served with this guy back when we were soldiers in the Core. We fought to take back Gitmo from Charlie, and also helped bomb Pearl Harbor to show the krauts what for. We're true 'merikin heroes, and you are disrespecting that!


I know several people over 50 years old who would believe everything you just typed if you said it with conviction.  Why yes, they were dumb enough to believe everything Trump, Russia, and the right-wing nutjob propaganda outlets said.
 
2022-10-05 3:22:34 PM  
More stellar modern "journalism":

VoteVets, a progressive veterans organization supporting U.S. Rep. Angie Craig, who is in a tight rematch with Kistner in the 2nd Congressional District, sent letters asking KARE, KSTP, KMSP, WCCO and multiple streaming services to take down the ad because it said Kistner served four overseas tours - not four combat deployments - in non-combat regions such as Japan and Korea.

"It"? It, as in the ad said that he served four overseas tours, or "it", as in the group said this?
 
2022-10-05 3:22:43 PM  
Semi-related: the candidate for the "Legal Marijuana Now" (aka GOP party to take votes from the DFL) in this district passed away today. Which isn't crazy by itself, but the LMN candidate in this district in 2020 also died about a month before the election.
 
2022-10-05 3:22:43 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


 This is an outrage!
 
2022-10-05 3:23:33 PM  

Aquapope: eKonk: Hey, don't believe the fake news media here, guys... I should know, I served with this guy back when we were soldiers in the Core. We fought to take back Gitmo from Charlie, and also helped bomb Pearl Harbor to show the krauts what for. We're true 'merikin heroes, and you are disrespecting that!

I know several people over 50 years old who would believe everything you just typed if you said it with conviction.  Why yes, they were dumb enough to believe everything Trump, Russia, and the right-wing nutjob propaganda outlets said.


I know several people under 50 who believe the same shiat. Stop pretending like this is all some kind of "Boomer" shiat.
 
2022-10-05 3:23:45 PM  
What is it with conservatives and lying about service?

Even Trump didn't bother lying about it, he just dodged. Though I could kind of see him claiming service...

"It was right after 9/11. I'd joined the Army Special Guys to attack Irak. Things were going badly until some guy named Schwartzkopf heard I was there and sent me a letter. It's was beautiful. A perfect letter. It said 'Please Command Leutinint Major Trump, come help me defeat Irak...' So, I went and helped. And we won. Really, it was mostly me, but he helped a little. Hardly at all really..it was all me really..."
 
2022-10-05 3:23:58 PM  

fiddlehead: You would think Repubs, who abhor Stolen Valor and worship the military, would be slapping the shiat out of these guys, but.


They don't actually.  They wave the flag, misuse/appropriate the flag for all kinds of things, say "America" constantly, etc.  But few to none of them actually have true belief.  They'll excuse this turd because he's on their "team".

Just like they excuse Head-Injury Herschel for abortions (and lying) because he's on their "team".
 
2022-10-05 3:24:38 PM  

YakBoy42: We really need to get over fetishizing military service. It's a job. It's a dangerous job, but it's still a job. Crab fishing is a dangerous job but no one is going around sucking the fishermen's dicks over it


Of course not, they have crabs.
 
2022-10-05 3:25:33 PM  
Wow...
Grant said Kistner's comment about being on the "wrong end of a loaded weapon" and having guns drawn on him "while in defense of our nation" was a reference to when he got into an argument with one of the allied military commanders, who pulled a pistol on him.

And these people are eating his shiat up, I bet...
 
2022-10-05 3:26:19 PM  

Mikey1969: Aquapope: eKonk: Hey, don't believe the fake news media here, guys... I should know, I served with this guy back when we were soldiers in the Core. We fought to take back Gitmo from Charlie, and also helped bomb Pearl Harbor to show the krauts what for. We're true 'merikin heroes, and you are disrespecting that!

I know several people over 50 years old who would believe everything you just typed if you said it with conviction.  Why yes, they were dumb enough to believe everything Trump, Russia, and the right-wing nutjob propaganda outlets said.

I know several people under 50 who believe the same shiat. Stop pretending like this is all some kind of "Boomer" shiat.


It's not totally (or exclusively) Boomer shiate, but it WOULD be fair to say that the percentage of Boomers who are Fake Patriots and hypocrites is pretty high.
 
2022-10-05 3:26:23 PM  
Dude looks gay as hell NTTIAWWT
 
2022-10-05 3:26:48 PM  

Glockenspiel Hero: hubiestubert: So, an REMF decided to steal some glory after coasting his deployment behind a desk stamping paperwork?

Sounds on brand.

What's really frustrating is that the Ukraine War should have taught people about the importance of the guys serving behind the front line.  Seal Team 6 Special Green Delta Beret Forces can't do squat without a whole pile of people making sure they have food, fuel, bullets, working helicopters....

Forget that and you end up looking like Russia.

/Oh, yeah


Yeah this. I think combat being the end all be all of service is not only a distortion of what the military actually does, it also does a disservice to people who serve in non-combat roles. Which, I agree with the above, are FANTASTICALLY more valuable on average than your typical trigger puller. This kind of garbage shiats all over them too.

"It dishonors those who have served," VoteVets Chair Jon Soltz said of Kistner's statements. "It is also totally disqualifying. Voters should hold Kistner responsible for misrepresenting his service and allowing this lie to perpetuate."

Also this. I hope voters see through this b.s.
 
2022-10-05 3:28:13 PM  

hubiestubert: So, an REMF decided to steal some glory after coasting his deployment behind a desk stamping paperwork?

Sounds on brand.


And he will win his seat. Barefaced lies are a sign of strength if you're a Republican politician.
 
2022-10-05 3:28:27 PM  

Ray_Finkle: Semi-related: the candidate for the "Legal Marijuana Now" (aka GOP party to take votes from the DFL) in this district passed away today. Which isn't crazy by itself, but the LMN candidate in this district in 2020 also died about a month before the election.


Were either of them named Becky?
 
2022-10-05 3:28:43 PM  

Psychopusher: During a January 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said he put his enemy "six feet under."
"I pushed some asshole down an open manhole."

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've been on the wrong end of a loaded weapon."
"I forgot to unload my weapon while I was cleaning it."

In an April 2020 virtual town gall with the Minnesota Young Republicans, Kistner referred to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq and said, "I've been in such conflicts."
"I've called my middle-eastern neighbour racist things because his dog shiat on my lawn.  He's probably a terrorist anyway."

During a February 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said, "I've been in fights, I've been in combat. I know exactly what it's gonna take."
"I punched my middle-eastern neighbour in the face because his dog wouldn't stop shiatting on my lawn."

In October 2020, during a Voice of India Community Town Hall, Kistner said, "As a veteran, I deployed to the front lines six months at a time, and my family was back in this country."
"I've been to the front of the line in the mess tent.  That counts, right?"

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've had guns drawn on me overseas in defense of our nation."
"Some thugs in northern Africa tried to mug me.  I told them America could kick their shiathole country's ass.  One of them drew a gun and said, 'America isn't here right now.'  I wet myself."


Well, you're not even that far off :-D

FTFA: Grant said Kistner's comment about being on the "wrong end of a loaded weapon" and having guns drawn on him "while in defense of our nation" was a reference to when he got into an argument with one of the allied military commanders, who pulled a pistol on him.
 
2022-10-05 3:29:36 PM  
Not to mention his tours in Vietnam taking on General Tso at La Choy and Dim Sum.
 
2022-10-05 3:30:20 PM  
Imagine thinking participation in a losing war is a selling point.
 
2022-10-05 3:33:52 PM  

anuran: hubiestubert: So, an REMF decided to steal some glory after coasting his deployment behind a desk stamping paperwork?

Sounds on brand.

And he will win his seat. Barefaced lies are a sign of strength if you're a Republican politician.


Especially if it helps you "own some Libs".
 
2022-10-05 3:34:57 PM  

Kris_Romm: Mikey1969: Aquapope: eKonk: Hey, don't believe the fake news media here, guys... I should know, I served with this guy back when we were soldiers in the Core. We fought to take back Gitmo from Charlie, and also helped bomb Pearl Harbor to show the krauts what for. We're true 'merikin heroes, and you are disrespecting that!

I know several people over 50 years old who would believe everything you just typed if you said it with conviction.  Why yes, they were dumb enough to believe everything Trump, Russia, and the right-wing nutjob propaganda outlets said.

I know several people under 50 who believe the same shiat. Stop pretending like this is all some kind of "Boomer" shiat.

It's not totally (or exclusively) Boomer shiate, but it WOULD be fair to say that the percentage of Boomers who are Fake Patriots and hypocrites is pretty high.


Sure, but to make it sound like it's exclusive? That's just stupid.
 
2022-10-05 3:35:02 PM  
Something, something, "Respect the Troops TM"
 
2022-10-05 3:35:19 PM  

danny_kay: Psychopusher: During a January 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said he put his enemy "six feet under."
"I pushed some asshole down an open manhole."

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've been on the wrong end of a loaded weapon."
"I forgot to unload my weapon while I was cleaning it."

In an April 2020 virtual town gall with the Minnesota Young Republicans, Kistner referred to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq and said, "I've been in such conflicts."
"I've called my middle-eastern neighbour racist things because his dog shiat on my lawn.  He's probably a terrorist anyway."

During a February 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said, "I've been in fights, I've been in combat. I know exactly what it's gonna take."
"I punched my middle-eastern neighbour in the face because his dog wouldn't stop shiatting on my lawn."

In October 2020, during a Voice of India Community Town Hall, Kistner said, "As a veteran, I deployed to the front lines six months at a time, and my family was back in this country."
"I've been to the front of the line in the mess tent.  That counts, right?"

In a March 2020 candidate forum, Kistner said "I've had guns drawn on me overseas in defense of our nation."
"Some thugs in northern Africa tried to mug me.  I told them America could kick their shiathole country's ass.  One of them drew a gun and said, 'America isn't here right now.'  I wet myself."

Well, you're not even that far off :-D

FTFA: Grant said Kistner's comment about being on the "wrong end of a loaded weapon" and having guns drawn on him "while in defense of our nation" was a reference to when he got into an argument with one of the allied military commanders, who pulled a pistol on him.


I was gonna post and ask the same question, What in the fark did he do to have that happen?
 
2022-10-05 3:35:53 PM  

Mikey1969: Wow...
Grant said Kistner's comment about being on the "wrong end of a loaded weapon" and having guns drawn on him "while in defense of our nation" was a reference to when he got into an argument with one of the allied military commanders, who pulled a pistol on him.

And these people are eating his shiat up, I bet...


As a veteran who saw absolutely nothing resembling actual combat... this tells me everything I need to know about Kistner and his deployment behavior.
 
2022-10-05 3:40:11 PM  

YakBoy42: We really need to get over fetishizing military service. It's a job. It's a dangerous job, but it's still a job. Crab fishing is a dangerous job but no one is going around sucking the fishermen's dicks over it


It's unfair to compare the two. Crab fishers do useful work that benefits people who don't own arms or oil companies.
 
2022-10-05 3:40:20 PM  
Real veterans are (rightly) quite touchy about this, regardless of your political affiliation.  FOFA
 
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