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(MLive.com)   Michigan man charged with two felonies for trying to access data on an electronic poll book with a USB drive during the August 2 primary Speculation on his preferred flavor of derp to the right   (mlive.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Voting, Elections, Voter registration, Kent County, Michigan, Kent County election officials, Grand Rapids - Wyoming metropolitan area, Election, Gaines Township  
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1466 clicks; posted to Politics » on 05 Oct 2022 at 2:05 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



43 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-10-05 10:04:11 AM  
It's Grand Rapids, so yeah, what you think it is.
 
2022-10-05 10:10:13 AM  
Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?
 
2022-10-05 10:35:12 AM  

Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?


<laughs nervously> ... of course they are.
 
2022-10-05 10:38:15 AM  
Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).
 
2022-10-05 10:47:26 AM  

BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).


20 years.
Hard labor
 
2022-10-05 11:44:44 AM  

vudukungfu: BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).

20 years.
Hard labor


That works just fine, too.
 
2022-10-05 2:07:43 PM  
Since he's actually getting charged is he a Democrat? Dnrtfa
 
2022-10-05 2:08:25 PM  

vudukungfu: BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).

20 years.
Hard labor


20 years!?

18 months' hard labor seems fair enough.
 
2022-10-05 2:08:27 PM  

Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?


I'm a fan of the "fill the USB ports with super glue" method of access control.
 
2022-10-05 2:10:59 PM  

cretinbob: It's Grand Rapids, so yeah, what you think it is.


The first line of TFA spelled out "Republican Assclown" as clear as day: "68-year-old Grand Rapids area election worker"
 
2022-10-05 2:11:08 PM  
My guess: rubber ducky
 
2022-10-05 2:12:36 PM  

BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).


He'll be ready to cheat again when I'M ERIC runs.
 
2022-10-05 2:12:44 PM  
Every accusation is a confession with these cultist losers!
 
2022-10-05 2:13:21 PM  
I'm guessing pralines and dick flavor.
 
2022-10-05 2:13:47 PM  
What's the over/under on betting for Mike Pillow to have paid this guy to "prove" fraud?
 
2022-10-05 2:17:23 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: vudukungfu: BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).

20 years.
Hard labor

20 years!?

18 months' hard labor seems fair enough.


He is a tough on crime conservative and understand if he is found guilty the only appropriate sentence is the max. Anything less would prove he is un-American and that is not acceptable.
 
2022-10-05 2:18:26 PM  

Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?


As far as the ones in ohio, the USB ports are locked up to prevent physical access but only with a locking tag. You can tear it off no problem. I don't know what sort of software blocks are in place, but I imagine while they're in "voting mode" they'll flip out if you try to plug something into them. Can't say for sure, they don't cover that in the rover training.

/Volunteer for your local elections!
//meet new people!
///Get paid VERY little for you time.
 
2022-10-05 2:23:30 PM  

Karma Chameleon: Since he's actually getting charged is he a Democrat? Dnrtfa


They tried to hide it ("MLive is not naming the man pending his Oct. 17 arraignment.") , but looking for other outlets' versions, it turns out they guy was James Holkeboer, a delegate to the 2022 GOP convention.
 
2022-10-05 2:29:54 PM  
THE ELECTION WAS STOLEN AND FRAUDULENT!
WE KNOW, CUZ WE'RE THE ONES DOING IT1!

-MAGAts.
 
2022-10-05 2:30:14 PM  

Telephone Sanitizer Second Class: I'm guessing pralines and dick flavor.


Werthers and spooge.
 
2022-10-05 2:35:28 PM  
Kent County Clerk Lisa Posthumus-Lyons...

So not only are dead people voting, they're also working as county clerk?
 
2022-10-05 2:35:53 PM  

LoneCoon: Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?

As far as the ones in ohio, the USB ports are locked up to prevent physical access but only with a locking tag. You can tear it off no problem. I don't know what sort of software blocks are in place, but I imagine while they're in "voting mode" they'll flip out if you try to plug something into them. Can't say for sure, they don't cover that in the rover training.

/Volunteer for your local elections!
//meet new people!
///Get paid VERY little for you time.


It sounds like this wasn't the machine that collects and counts votes. It was the one they use to check voters in.
 
2022-10-05 2:39:33 PM  

LoneCoon: Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?

As far as the ones in ohio, the USB ports are locked up to prevent physical access but only with a locking tag. You can tear it off no problem. I don't know what sort of software blocks are in place, but I imagine while they're in "voting mode" they'll flip out if you try to plug something into them. Can't say for sure, they don't cover that in the rover training.


This was the Electronic Poll Book, not the actual poll machines. I'm speculating here, but based on the description, that system is air gapped from everything. I would bet that they sneakernet the data using USB to that system. Only poll workers should have physical access to the system so it supposed to be a reasonable level of risk.

This actually opens an argument that maybe air gapped systems are a problem because they can't be activity remotely monitored. In theory a modern endpoint system would log all USB activity and allow for a policy lock either by time or approved device for an multi-party access control. I'd need to spend some time on the design, but it's worth debating the air-gap requirement.
 
2022-10-05 2:41:39 PM  

X-Geek: Kent County Clerk Lisa Posthumus-Lyons...

So not only are dead people voting, they're also working as county clerk?


The West Michigan Dutch think you're the weird one if you raise an eyebrow at common surnames like Posthumus or Molesta. farking Vanderdendurs.
 
2022-10-05 2:43:31 PM  

blasterz: Karma Chameleon: Since he's actually getting charged is he a Democrat? Dnrtfa

They tried to hide it ("MLive is not naming the man pending his Oct. 17 arraignment.") , but looking for other outlets' versions, it turns out they guy was James Holkeboer, a delegate to the 2022 GOP convention.



Here's my surprised face:

Fark user imageView Full Size


Gaines Twp is south west of Grand Rapids and most of it is firmly in Trumplandia including the 8th which is were the incident happened.
 
2022-10-05 2:43:42 PM  

blasterz: Karma Chameleon: Since he's actually getting charged is he a Democrat? Dnrtfa

They tried to hide it ("MLive is not naming the man pending his Oct. 17 arraignment.") , but looking for other outlets' versions, it turns out they guy was James Holkeboer, a delegate to the 2022 GOP convention.


Wow. Pleasantly surprised
 
2022-10-05 2:46:17 PM  

hackalope: LoneCoon: Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?

As far as the ones in ohio, the USB ports are locked up to prevent physical access but only with a locking tag. You can tear it off no problem. I don't know what sort of software blocks are in place, but I imagine while they're in "voting mode" they'll flip out if you try to plug something into them. Can't say for sure, they don't cover that in the rover training.

This was the Electronic Poll Book, not the actual poll machines. I'm speculating here, but based on the description, that system is air gapped from everything. I would bet that they sneakernet the data using USB to that system. Only poll workers should have physical access to the system so it supposed to be a reasonable level of risk.

This actually opens an argument that maybe air gapped systems are a problem because they can't be activity remotely monitored. In theory a modern endpoint system would log all USB activity and allow for a policy lock either by time or approved device for an multi-party access control. I'd need to spend some time on the design, but it's worth debating the air-gap requirement.


Keep in mind that while actual security is paramount, perceived security also is pretty important. Can not be accessed through the internet is easier to explain than, we monitor and control all access remotely.
 
2022-10-05 2:47:50 PM  
Is it really worth going to federal prison for 5 years just to get Trump elected?  Wait another two years and someone waaaaay more obnoxious, bombastic and authoritarian is going on the presidential ballot.
 
2022-10-05 2:48:21 PM  

BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).


Banned from voting ever again. I believe we should allow former felons to vote and make that an easy process, however, if you're guilty of any sort of election crime you lose that right FOREVER.
 
2022-10-05 2:54:21 PM  
Fark user image
 
2022-10-05 3:16:28 PM  

X-Geek: Kent County Clerk Lisa Posthumus-Lyons...


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-10-05 3:46:57 PM  
FTFA: "Following the election, (suspect) admitted to inserting personal USB drive into the Electronic Poll Book computer in an attempt to obtain copies of the election reports for unauthorized, personal use," according to the affidavit. Police did not go into further detail about the worker's motives.

I don't think they need to. It seems pretty clear. We can probably assume it wasn't so he could send a thank you card to everyone who voted.
 
db2
2022-10-05 3:55:20 PM  
I grew up in Gaines Township, so I have a fair guess.
 
2022-10-05 5:25:06 PM  
I live in Gaines Township. I guarantee he is exactly what you think he is.
 
2022-10-05 5:29:22 PM  

db2: I grew up in Gaines Township, so I have a fair guess.


Congratulations on getting out. I moved here (should have done my research). 76th/Eastern.
 
2022-10-05 5:29:42 PM  

Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?


well, I mean, you can disable the ability to mount drives/attach drives via USB or any other method, and include tattles for people who do.  That's easy to do and we do it all the time for employee machines for security.

That doesn't physically block the port, though, so people can still *try*.
 
2022-10-05 5:33:33 PM  
He's such a POS I bet his favorite flavor is Canada Dry ginger ale.
YEAH I SAID IT
 
2022-10-05 5:54:02 PM  

Kit Fister: Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?

well, I mean, you can disable the ability to mount drives/attach drives via USB or any other method, and include tattles for people who do.  That's easy to do and we do it all the time for employee machines for security.

That doesn't physically block the port, though, so people can still *try*.


Right, I know you can still plug the drive in, I'm questioning if they did the stuff to prevent the drive from being mounted.
 
2022-10-05 6:04:45 PM  

Bootleg: Kit Fister: Bootleg: Those ports are locked down, right?

/They aren't, are they?

well, I mean, you can disable the ability to mount drives/attach drives via USB or any other method, and include tattles for people who do.  That's easy to do and we do it all the time for employee machines for security.

That doesn't physically block the port, though, so people can still *try*.

Right, I know you can still plug the drive in, I'm questioning if they did the stuff to prevent the drive from being mounted.


Fair. I'm bettting the guy tried to attached a USB disk to the machine and it sent an alarm/notice saying it detected an attempt to mount the disk. Hence he got arrested for *attempting* to access it.
 
2022-10-05 7:14:29 PM  

vudukungfu: BenSaw2: Also - 5 years seems about right - if he's given the full sentence.

/ that bring you definitely past the next election (or 2).

20 years.
Hard labor


Seriously, farking with elections should be up there with rape and murder for severity when it comes to punishment.  That's messing with the foundations of how our whole system of governance works.  That's a huge deal, as we've seen recently.  The punishment should be so severe nobody even thinks seriously about doing it.
 
2022-10-05 7:45:37 PM  

Bovine Diarrhea Virus: Is it really worth going to federal prison for 5 years just to get Trump elected?  Wait another two years and someone waaaaay more obnoxious, bombastic and authoritarian is going on the presidential ballot.


I mean, I think you misspelled time served and few weeks of probation, but I also assume he was planning on being the hero who got Trump back into office & pardoned if necessary. Could still happen, at least the pardon bit.
 
2022-10-05 8:17:40 PM  

Yakk: [Fark user image image 54x12]


We're the Florida of the north
 
db2
2022-10-05 8:25:02 PM  

msrbley: db2: I grew up in Gaines Township, so I have a fair guess.

Congratulations on getting out. I moved here (should have done my research). 76th/Eastern.


I didn't make it very far though. I'm just inside Barry County (which isn't much better).
 
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