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(CNN)   CNN frontpage headline "Which type of coffee protects you from heart disease and early death?". CNN article "All kinds of coffee". This. Is CNN   (cnn.com) divider line
    More: Repeat, Coffee, day of most types of coffee, decaffeinated coffee, new study, types of coffee, energy drinks, instant coffee, cardiovascular disease  
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934 clicks; posted to Main » and STEM » on 29 Sep 2022 at 2:05 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



38 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-09-29 1:42:09 PM  
scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.netView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 2:09:30 PM  
If you really want to protect yourself from injury or death, I recommend Wilkin's Coffee.

Wilkins Coffee - Wilkins and Wontkins (1957-1961, USA)
Youtube LmhIizQQol0
 
2022-09-29 2:11:13 PM  
The data changed when it came to coffee's impact on irregular heartbeat: Four to five cups a day of caffeinated ground coffee lowered risk by 17% while two to three cups a day of instant coffee reduced the likelihood of arrhythmia by 12%, the statement said.

Uh, if I try drinking 4-5 cups of coffee in a day, my heart (which already has a weird-yet-consistent beat) is going to threaten me with A-Fib. (Which I have had in the past.) Which is why I generally limit it to one in the morning and one in the afternoon.
 
2022-09-29 2:13:47 PM  

kdawg7736: [scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net image 521x720]


But, but... science says coffee naps are better than just coffee, or just naps.   What. Do. I. Do!?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 2:14:29 PM  
Coffee News Network ?


/ I don't like coffee much
// guess I'll die early
 
2022-09-29 2:15:13 PM  
Irish coffee it is, then.
 
2022-09-29 2:15:34 PM  
Actually I read always filter. Don't do French press, or Turkish.
 
2022-09-29 2:16:22 PM  

waxbeans: Actually I read always filter. Don't do French press, or Turkish.


Which means I'm going to die.
I get lazy and just toss fine grounds in water and slam it.
 
2022-09-29 2:16:38 PM  
Coffee lowers risk of heart problems and early death, study says, especially ground and caffeinated

So much for my chewing unground decaffeinated beans.
 
2022-09-29 2:18:41 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: If you really want to protect yourself from injury or death, I recommend Wilkin's Coffee.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/LmhIizQQol0?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsapi=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&widgetid=1]


So much in there that Henson did eventually made its way into Sesame Street and the Muppets.  Even smaller things like the shifty trenchcoat guy, etc.
 
2022-09-29 2:18:41 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 2:19:25 PM  

Dr. Bison: Coffee lowers risk of heart problems and early death, study says, especially ground and caffeinated

So much for my chewing unground decaffeinated beans.


This.

I mean, how else do you prepare coffee if it's not ground?
 
2022-09-29 2:19:36 PM  
The coffee that elongates my life and protects me from an early death is the coffee I bring to my girlfriend in bed in the morning.
 
2022-09-29 2:20:37 PM  

kdawg7736: [scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net image 521x720]


This is honestly how I get through work some afternoons when I'm tired. Drink a cup of coffee, immediately take a nap in my office with a timer set for 15 minutes, wake up more refreshed than from the coffee or nap separately.
 
2022-09-29 2:21:01 PM  
You had ONE job, CNNhealth!
 
2022-09-29 2:21:31 PM  

edwoodca: kdawg7736: [scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net image 521x720]

But, but... science says coffee naps are better than just coffee, or just naps.   What. Do. I. Do!?


[Fark user image 600x384]


Clearly I should have read 3 more comments before commenting myself. Maybe it's time for a coffee nap.
 
2022-09-29 2:21:38 PM  
The key is to not add copious amounts of high fat dairy.  I've had one frappuccino in the last 6 years.  Everything else has been short, hot espresso or drip with 1% milk.
 
2022-09-29 2:22:20 PM  
I don't drink coffee but I like the aroma of the coffee aisle at the grocery store.
 
2022-09-29 2:22:40 PM  

uttertosh: The coffee that elongates my life and protects me from an early death is the coffee I bring to my girlfriend in bed in the morning.


For me, it's making fresh pots of coffee from the beans I get from Peet's as a subscription because it's really good coffee my wife enjoys.
 
2022-09-29 2:23:42 PM  

bighairyguy: I don't drink coffee but I like the aroma of the coffee aisle at the grocery store.


I completely get that.  I don't smoke but love the smell of good cigar or pipe tobacco.
 
2022-09-29 2:24:54 PM  

Needlessly Complicated: Dr. Bison: Coffee lowers risk of heart problems and early death, study says, especially ground and caffeinated

So much for my chewing unground decaffeinated beans.

This.

I mean, how else do you prepare coffee if it's not ground?


Minced? I don't know, it works for beef.
 
2022-09-29 2:25:59 PM  

DoctorWhat: Maybe it's time for a coffee nap.


Anytime is a good time for a coffee nap!


/If you're one of dem vampire types that doesn't abide by the circadian/sun rhythm pattern thing.
 
2022-09-29 2:30:24 PM  
I don't believe in all this "vitamin coffee" nonsense.

That's why I alternate Jagermeister with Red Bull.
 
2022-09-29 2:30:32 PM  
If coffee prevents early death then I'm farking immortal. I drink black coffee all day like water.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 2:36:58 PM  

Dr. Bison: Coffee lowers risk of heart problems and early death, study says, especially ground and caffeinated

So much for my chewing unground decaffeinated beans.


Four words:

Chocolate covered coffee beans.

They don't come in decaf, though.
 
2022-09-29 2:37:32 PM  

stamped human bacon: Needlessly Complicated: Dr. Bison: Coffee lowers risk of heart problems and early death, study says, especially ground and caffeinated

So much for my chewing unground decaffeinated beans.

This.

I mean, how else do you prepare coffee if it's not ground?

Minced? I don't know, it works for beef.


Espresso martini?
 
2022-09-29 2:52:03 PM  
It'll be a little chilly when I go get breakfast on Saturday, so I'll probably get coffee instead of iced tea. I don't keep coffee in the house though.
 
2022-09-29 2:55:21 PM  

harleyquinnical: bighairyguy: I don't drink coffee but I like the aroma of the coffee aisle at the grocery store.

I completely get that.  I don't smoke but love the smell of good cigar or pipe tobacco.


I don't wash, but I love the smell of detergent in the laundry aisle.
 
2022-09-29 3:06:38 PM  
Dave Grohl in FRESH POTS!
Youtube fhdCslFcKFU
 
2022-09-29 3:23:21 PM  
Most days I live my mornings and early afternoons on coffee and maybe an 8oz protein shake.  So I expect to live forever.
 
2022-09-29 3:25:07 PM  

ElwoodCuse: [YouTube video: Dave Grohl in FRESH POTS!]


You've gotta grind and brew it yourself, too. He learned the hard way.

preview.redd.itView Full Size


preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 3:44:25 PM  
Well, I guess I'm immortal.

So, my new motto is:

There can be only one...
...mug in the morning and another in the afternoon.

Seriously, I drink too much coffee. I need to cut down.
 
2022-09-29 3:53:09 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 4:17:02 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-29 4:22:59 PM  

DoctorWhat: kdawg7736: [scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net image 521x720]

This is honestly how I get through work some afternoons when I'm tired. Drink a cup of coffee, immediately take a nap in my office with a timer set for 15 minutes, wake up more refreshed than from the coffee or nap separately.


I've done that and had Fitbit tell me I was actually out for 2+ hours
 
2022-09-29 7:00:06 PM  

BlazeTrailer: DoctorWhat: kdawg7736: [scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net image 521x720]

This is honestly how I get through work some afternoons when I'm tired. Drink a cup of coffee, immediately take a nap in my office with a timer set for 15 minutes, wake up more refreshed than from the coffee or nap separately.

I've done that and had Fitbit tell me I was actually out for 2+ hours


Doing it without an alarm set is a good way to lose a lot of time. Thus the timer.
 
2022-09-30 12:25:43 AM  
I drink 8 to 16 cups a day.  About to go in for numbers 9 and 10.  I do dark roast.  Can't handle light roast.  That shiat makes me jittery AF.
 
2022-09-30 5:51:43 PM  

backhand.slap.of.reason: I drink 8 to 16 cups a day.  About to go in for numbers 9 and 10.  I do dark roast.  Can't handle light roast.  That shiat makes me jittery AF.


Coffee beans expand more as they're roasted dark. The same amount of dark roast beans would produce a larger volume of grounds than light roast, but with lower density - so if you're making coffee by scooping a consistent amount of grounds into your coffeemaker, you're getting less caffeine with the dark roast.

If you weigh out the grounds instead, that would give you the same amount of caffeine regardless of the roast color. You might want to adjust the amount of water for flavor, though.
 
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