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(CNBC)   4) Don't be over 45 or lie shamelessly about your age   (cnbc.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Time zone, remote jobs, exclusively remote work arrangement, work-from-anywhere job, office full-time, number of remote job openings, coming months, pandemic restrictions  
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849 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 26 Sep 2022 at 10:35 AM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



16 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-09-26 10:53:19 AM  
Git gud at SAP.
 
2022-09-26 11:02:50 AM  
Those tips really don't seem related to landing a remote-work job. They are basic skills needed to do such a job.
 
2022-09-26 12:04:48 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-26 1:23:34 PM  
Humor me:  why the age comment?
 
2022-09-26 2:02:09 PM  

Groupon boob job: Humor me:  why the age comment?


Because working from home requires someone who's tech savvy. Not a Bill Gates prodigy but someone who at least knows how to use their Smartphone, navigate the Internet, use a scanner, attach a document to an email, and doesn't use an AOL address.  Too many people who are 45 and older never learned any of that, so companies tend to avoid those ages. It's illegal and a direct violation of the Civil Rights Act but ONLY if you're caught. They can just make up any excuse as to why they didn't hire you. They didn't like your "attitude", you answered some BS question "wrong" (if you were a color, what would you be?).
 
2022-09-26 2:25:01 PM  
Don't show any white hair-----especially not in a beard

It does you no favors.

Also, chop-off anything 10 years old from your resume
 
2022-09-26 2:46:31 PM  
If I but booze or herbs I get carded. I have a white Santa Beard. effin pain in the ass, these places that card everybody.
 
2022-09-26 3:09:15 PM  
Notes from a former recruiter/headhunter:

Do not put the year you graduated college on your resume
Do not put college on your resume unless you graduated
Do not put jobs over 10 years old on your resume
Do not use a ridiculous email on your resume (emails are free.  First name.Last n­a­me­[nospam-﹫-backwards]lia­mg*com is perfectly fine)
Do not put references on your resume (only recruiters ask for references anymore and they only do that so they can pester those people for job orders)
Do not put an objective on your resume (the objective is to get hired. Nobody cares what kind of corporate-speak you use to say that.  Use that space to highlight your strong points)
Don't put your political or religious affiliation ANYWHERE
Make sure your LinkedIn profile matches your resume
Scrub your social media of ANYTHING that looks unprofessional, controversial, or political (religious stuff here is acceptable)

DO put a bullet-point or two about a major accomplishment you were responsible for (how did you save the company money, streamline a process, solved a huge problem, grew your territory or exceeded your goals, etc.)
If you see a job you like TAILOR YOUR RESUME TO FIT IT.  Don't lie (too much)--just tweak your resume to hit the skills the job is looking for.
Companies get tax breaks for hiring vets.  If you served, PUT THAT ON THERE.  And put your rank, your job title, and a bit about what that title means (I had a sergeant whose title I can't remember but it turned out he was in charge of logistics.  You'd NEVER get that from just a title and his E-5 rank he put on there.
 
2022-09-26 3:26:52 PM  

brigid_fitch: [Excellent advice]


Also:
• Don't put a picture on your resume.
• Don't mention your spouse or children on your resume.
• If you claim you know how to use particular software, make sure you spell it right, including capitalization. Even if you think you know it, verify it.
• Don't put <degree> after your name unless you've already graduated. If you're a candidate, or working on it, do <degree> candidate, rather than <degree>, place, and then in tiny type "expected 2027." In other words, don't be seen as trying to weasel something you haven't earned.
 
2022-09-26 4:20:37 PM  

brigid_fitch: Groupon boob job: Humor me:  why the age comment?

Because working from home requires someone who's tech savvy. Not a Bill Gates prodigy but someone who at least knows how to use their Smartphone, navigate the Internet, use a scanner, attach a document to an email, and doesn't use an AOL address.  Too many people who are 45 and older never learned any of that, so companies tend to avoid those ages. It's illegal and a direct violation of the Civil Rights Act but ONLY if you're caught. They can just make up any excuse as to why they didn't hire you. They didn't like your "attitude", you answered some BS question "wrong" (if you were a color, what would you be?).


That's weird because most of the people I know deploying all this stuff are older than 45 and definitely know how to use technology a shiatload better than their younger peers.

I mean, some of these youngins can barely use a command line. That's not bad per se, but seriously learning to code your equipment properly. Terrible skills.

Funny as hell watching kids deploy using web interfaces / templates being humiliated by people using their own tools / CLI.
 
2022-09-26 4:46:30 PM  

brigid_fitch: (if you were a color, what would you be?)


Grace Kelly feat...
Youtube 8jMPgvaOXH8
 
2022-09-26 4:49:42 PM  

Fear the Clam: brigid_fitch: [Excellent advice]

Also:
[More excellent advice]


Also:
• Signal using dog whistles that you're the "right kind" of person, like listing hobbies such as "yachting", "wine tasting", and "laughing at the poors"

/at least that's what most of the successful hires at my former firm included on their resumes...
 
2022-09-26 5:30:34 PM  

inglixthemad: brigid_fitch: Groupon boob job: Humor me:  why the age comment?

Because working from home requires someone who's tech savvy. Not a Bill Gates prodigy but someone who at least knows how to use their Smartphone, navigate the Internet, use a scanner, attach a document to an email, and doesn't use an AOL address.  Too many people who are 45 and older never learned any of that, so companies tend to avoid those ages. It's illegal and a direct violation of the Civil Rights Act but ONLY if you're caught. They can just make up any excuse as to why they didn't hire you. They didn't like your "attitude", you answered some BS question "wrong" (if you were a color, what would you be?).

That's weird because most of the people I know deploying all this stuff are older than 45 and definitely know how to use technology a shiatload better than their younger peers.

I mean, some of these youngins can barely use a command line. That's not bad per se, but seriously learning to code your equipment properly. Terrible skills.

Funny as hell watching kids deploy using web interfaces / templates being humiliated by people using their own tools / CLI.


Hell, most of the people *I* know have some kind of IT background or are tech junkies who just HAVE to have the coolest new gadgets. And most of my friends are well over 45. Like follows like--people who know computers will tend to hang with others who do or will teach them. I suspect your circle of friends is similar. But I'm speaking from 10+ years of recruiting. I've usually been the de facto IT recruiter in any office I've been in because I've been one of the few who could understand the jargon.

When we were forced to lock down for the Pandemic, it became real obvious real quick that a VERY large portion of the workforce didn't know the first thing about computers or the Internet. I was a trainer, so now had to do everything remotely. It was unfathomable the sheer number of people who couldn't fill out an online application, let alone set up a Zoom call. I had a woman who would fill out our forms by hand and scan them in because she'd fill it out, save it, and then couldn't figure out how to find it on her laptop.  The best is when they turn to me and are like, "You're expecting too much! I didn't grow up with this stuff like you did!". Then I show them my driver's license, showing I'm about 10 years older than them.
 
2022-09-26 6:09:45 PM  

brigid_fitch: "You're expecting too much! I didn't grow up with this stuff like you did!". Then I show them my driver's license, showing I'm about 10 years older than them.


My personal fave was getting the newly graduated college kids struggling with VPN not realizing I had the company install an agent on their corporate PC for end-to-end experience monitoring. No, not monitoring keystroke but literally monitoring their VPN and links to the the local / cloud servers.

"I can't get anything done, my VPN isn't working."
Your VPN is fine, but there is a UIE problem.
"UIE?"
Yeah, they're going to walk through some stuff after the team submits a correction.

UIE = User Interface Error, insert new user and try again.
 
2022-09-27 12:11:05 AM  

inglixthemad: brigid_fitch: "You're expecting too much! I didn't grow up with this stuff like you did!". Then I show them my driver's license, showing I'm about 10 years older than them.

My personal fave was getting the newly graduated college kids struggling with VPN not realizing I had the company install an agent on their corporate PC for end-to-end experience monitoring. No, not monitoring keystroke but literally monitoring their VPN and links to the the local / cloud servers.

"I can't get anything done, my VPN isn't working."
Your VPN is fine, but there is a UIE problem.
"UIE?"
Yeah, they're going to walk through some stuff after the team submits a correction.

UIE = User Interface Error, insert new user and try again.


I'm a big fan of blaming PEBKAC
 
2022-09-27 11:49:43 AM  

brigid_fitch: inglixthemad: brigid_fitch: "You're expecting too much! I didn't grow up with this stuff like you did!". Then I show them my driver's license, showing I'm about 10 years older than them.

My personal fave was getting the newly graduated college kids struggling with VPN not realizing I had the company install an agent on their corporate PC for end-to-end experience monitoring. No, not monitoring keystroke but literally monitoring their VPN and links to the the local / cloud servers.

"I can't get anything done, my VPN isn't working."
Your VPN is fine, but there is a UIE problem.
"UIE?"
Yeah, they're going to walk through some stuff after the team submits a correction.

UIE = User Interface Error, insert new user and try again.

I'm a big fan of blaming PEBKAC


Just don't go reseating the user.
 
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