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(Jalopnik)   I dropped my new iPhone. EVERYBODY PANIC   (jalopnik.com) divider line
    More: Fail, Genius Bar, Apple Store, Apple Inc., back of the phone, Apple fanboy, IPhone, App Store, Steve Jobs  
•       •       •

7672 clicks; posted to Main » and STEM » on 24 Sep 2022 at 9:05 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



62 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2022-09-24 9:09:30 PM  
This is why I use a Quad Lock case and mounting system.
 
2022-09-24 9:09:43 PM  
Farts 4 life
 
2022-09-24 9:10:09 PM  
Parents are scumbags only old idiots forgot that
 
2022-09-24 9:11:04 PM  
Thats an ad.gif
 
2022-09-24 9:15:00 PM  
So what? He could just call his family, and tell them he didn't... wait, never mind.
 
2022-09-24 9:16:00 PM  
Groovy

media2.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2022-09-24 9:18:26 PM  
I think the writer wanted me to know he has the latest phone and a Harley electric motorcycle.
Mission accomplished I suppose.
 
2022-09-24 9:18:44 PM  

HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif



i don't think so. instead i think it was just the most amazing coincidence ever that someone who rides, writes, and has a new Apple iphone14, also had an apparently really crappy phone mount on their expensive new Livewire EM.
Cause of course after shelling out for the hot new phone and hot new electric motorcycle, he was so broke he had to risk his new iphone to the cheap-o substandard brand phone mount that is so cheap it is unworthy of mentioning the brand name of.

No really what how's that not what's real here?
 
2022-09-24 9:18:54 PM  
I'm thankful for this article. Should the day ever come where I own an iphone 14 I will immediately turn off this feature
 
2022-09-24 9:20:51 PM  

HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif


It's like 6 ads.

"I love riding my 2022 Livewire One"

"My Cardo bluetooth helmet speakers announced"

"Normally, a Peak Design case is incredible in every situation"

"This iPhone 14 and Apple Watch Ultra crash detection feature is great"
 
2022-09-24 9:21:10 PM  

waxbeans: Parents are scumbags only old idiots forgot that


Huh?
 
2022-09-24 9:21:56 PM  
2022 problems.

/the year, not the number of.
 
2022-09-24 9:22:23 PM  

HeadbangerSmurf: This is why I use a Quad Lock case and mounting system.


Thanks for spamming this advertisement with another advertisement!
 
2022-09-24 9:22:46 PM  

LordOfThePings: HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif

It's like 6 ads.

"I love riding my 2022 Livewire One"

"My Cardo bluetooth helmet speakers announced"

"Normally, a Peak Design case is incredible in every situation"

"This iPhone 14 and Apple Watch Ultra crash detection feature is great"


Yo Dawg... We put an ad in your ad...
 
2022-09-24 9:23:33 PM  
That's why I put my phone in my pocket, and that's where it stays until I get to where I'm going.

Anyone calls me...that's what voicemail is for. I can always answer a text later, as well.
 
2022-09-24 9:26:57 PM  
That poor iPhone was just calling for help. Siri has a soul people, did anyone stop to think about how she fared in the mishap?
 
2022-09-24 9:27:13 PM  

maestro8: HeadbangerSmurf: This is why I use a Quad Lock case and mounting system.

Thanks for spamming this advertisement with another advertisement!


Welcome to Fark?
 
2022-09-24 9:28:38 PM  
I've got a 12

/It just sorta sits there
 
2022-09-24 9:28:45 PM  

LordOfThePings: HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif

It's like 6 ads.

"I love riding my 2022 Livewire One"

"My Cardo bluetooth helmet speakers announced"

"Normally, a Peak Design case is incredible in every situation"

"This iPhone 14 and Apple Watch Ultra crash detection feature is great"


Don't forget his tech start up that is totally viable.
 
2022-09-24 9:29:53 PM  
I made through the first two paragraphs before I wished he had crashed and stopped reading.
 
2022-09-24 9:30:57 PM  

HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif


An ad for another stupid iPhone feature?
 
2022-09-24 9:32:36 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-24 9:33:18 PM  

mcsiegs: waxbeans: Parents are scumbags only old idiots forgot that

Huh?


Don't bother.  It's not worth your time.
 
2022-09-24 9:33:49 PM  
You were going to wait in line for six hours to ibuy a new iPhone the very next time Apple released one anyhow. Just use a droid or something else that is less bougie until that happens.
 
2022-09-24 9:34:48 PM  
Was the author someone with no real pockets?
 
2022-09-24 9:35:35 PM  

Archie Goodwin: 2022 problems.

/the year, not the number of.


But a biatch ain't one.
 
2022-09-24 9:35:43 PM  

SBinRR: I think the writer wanted me to know he has the latest phone and a Harley electric motorcycle.
Mission accomplished I suppose.


I did the Harley demo days for the live wire, I'm 90% certain it has a phone  glovebox so this doesn't happen and you can charge it there...
 
2022-09-24 9:37:09 PM  
Another one that should not be green.

RED. Do it. Nuke this article and thread.
 
2022-09-24 9:39:54 PM  
I can't wait for the first person to drop their iPhone 14 into the Grand Canyon and end up kicking off a $35M search party effort.
 
2022-09-24 9:42:02 PM  

gameshowhost: I can't wait for the first person to drop their iPhone 14 into the Grand Canyon and end up kicking off a $35M search party effort.


I thought you were going to say "and then tries to catch it".
 
2022-09-24 9:49:10 PM  
I love riding motorcycles, but not as much as I love my family.

And yet you still ride a motorcycle.

/I wouldn't sweat a false alarm about the crash. iat'll be true soon enough.
 
2022-09-24 9:52:12 PM  
Could be worse. The phone could have immediately reported you dead to your employer, insurance companies, and utility providers.
 
2022-09-24 9:55:56 PM  
Serves you right dummy. There's no scenario here that would excuse your dumbassery
 
2022-09-24 9:56:22 PM  
That was an Ad
 
2022-09-24 9:56:42 PM  
You gotta do what you gotta doo.

video-images.vice.comView Full Size
 
2022-09-24 9:56:44 PM  

Hills-Sachs_Legion: Could be worse. The phone could have immediately reported you dead to your employer, insurance companies, and utility providers.


I mean if my life insurance policy wants to pay out to my wife based on nothing more than a text from my phone, who am I to argue. I could use a few more days off work too.
 
2022-09-24 9:57:19 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-09-24 10:00:08 PM  

genner: [Fark user image image 426x532]


Making the phone scream when in free fall is a brilliant feature. Just think of how many idiots would willingly throw their $1,000 new toy across the room to hear it scream for a laugh. If enough people do it I guarantee you'll get plenty of sales for replacement screens and new phones after they broke the old one being stupid.
 
2022-09-24 10:02:27 PM  

ISO15693: That was an Ad


Even the comments are full of brand names.

I hate this timeline so much. I'm just going to get off my Verizon FIOS internet and watch ESPN college football on my LG OLED television in Dolby Surround.
 
2022-09-24 10:05:14 PM  

Vern: gameshowhost: I can't wait for the first person to drop their iPhone 14 into the Grand Canyon and end up kicking off a $35M search party effort.

I thought you were going to say "and then tries to catch it".


Well. There are lots of things I can't wait for.
 
2022-09-24 10:15:26 PM  
I thought Harley guys had Blackberries.
 
2022-09-24 10:37:29 PM  

sirrerun: ISO15693: That was an Ad

Even the comments are full of brand names.

I hate this timeline so much. I'm just going to get off my Verizon FIOS internet and watch ESPN college football on my LG OLED television in Dolby Surround.


techcrunch.comView Full Size
 
2022-09-24 10:37:31 PM  
Electric Harley and an Apple Fan Boi.  Prime douche.
 
2022-09-24 10:40:59 PM  

Hills-Sachs_Legion: Could be worse. The phone could have immediately reported you dead to your employer, insurance companies, and utility providers.


And Social Security.
 
2022-09-24 10:55:12 PM  

HeadbangerSmurf: This is why I use a Quad Lock case and mounting system.


So the manufacturer goes to great lengths to make their device as delicate as possible for esthetic reasons, you buy it for esthetic reasons, and then wrap it in a protective exoskeleton because the product is impractically fragile.

Fark. That.  I have my nice relatively inexpensive mil-spec Android phone.  I can drop it on concrete or throw it in a lake and it'll keep on working.  Right out of the box, no extra gear required.

Of course, it's not white, paper-thin, and doesn't have an Apple logo on it.  Suckers.
 
2022-09-24 11:02:21 PM  
Had a BT helmet in 2006 and an early MC gps.

Not only were they horrible first gen, they were kinda useless until I started leaving my neighborhood.  Use an updated 2012'ish GPS on the bikes now, but no music, directions, or phone babble into my helmet.  It's worked quietly and fine on several cross country trips.

I'd forgotten that the whole idea of a bike was to feel free and unattached from everything and a good portion of the time you need to pay 110% attention or you'll get creamed by someone updating FB or IG about their recent latte purchase at *$.
 
2022-09-24 11:14:26 PM  

Unsung_Hero: Of course, it's not white, paper-thin, and doesn't have an Apple logo on it.  Suckers.


I would bet that it also has:
- An older version of android than current
- Middling to bad battery life
- No resell/trade value

I was on Android, from the beginning, ran a xv6800 with a beta build then got a Droid X all the way to a Google Pixel 6. I switched to Apple to try it out and ended up staying with it, because phones don't really differ all that much. One thing I do like is Apple is all about privacy, and Google is not.

Also, I just tested this, but my iPhone 14 Pro Max got 36.5 hours of battery life with normal use, just over the last two days. I've never had a phone go that long. Also also, "paper thin and white"? What year is this? 2010? Have you seen a 14 Pro Max? About as thick as a Samsung Note (or said otherwise, not thin). My phone is black as well.

I have this feature on my phone, I'll be turning it off for now when I ride my motorcycle though.
 
2022-09-24 11:16:17 PM  

LordOfThePings: HighlanderRPI: Thats an ad.gif

It's like 6 ads.

"I love riding my 2022 Livewire One"

"My Cardo bluetooth helmet speakers announced"

"Normally, a Peak Design case is incredible in every situation"

"This iPhone 14 and Apple Watch Ultra crash detection feature is great"


"I heartily chucckled at this comment" I had typed out on my Samsung 22 Ultra. Thanfully, at the time, I was wearing my Carhart Comfort Fit t-shirt, and my Hanes X-comfort boxers as I had kust dropped some Fritos brand Cheetos on my lap. My Laz-y-boy recliner thankfully has durabrand apholsery, so cleaning it up will be a breeze in my Dyson turbosux.
 
2022-09-24 11:19:38 PM  

phimuskapsi: I would bet that it also has:
- An older version of android than current
- Middling to bad battery life
- No resell/trade value


My previous phone did... because I used it until the battery was no longer able to last a full day.

My current phone?  Current Android, great battery life.  And resale value?  Who gives a flying fark?  It's my phone, I'm using it as long as it works, not selling it because I feel the need to blow money on the latest marketed device.

It's a phone. Stop building your identity around it.
 
2022-09-24 11:22:56 PM  
when my new iPhone 14 Pro Max erroneously texted my mom, my girlfriend, and several close friends, telling them I'd been in a terrible accident,

Translation, user error.
 
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