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(Walla Walla Union-Bulletin)   Oceans Eleven it ain't   (union-bulletin.com) divider line
    More: News, Pendleton, Oregon, Umatilla Indian Reservation, Umatilla County, Oregon, Confederated Tribes of the Umatilla Indian Reservation, Mission, Oregon, Foothills of the Blue Mountains of Washington, Indian reservation, Sheriff  
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5093 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Aug 2022 at 12:05 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



20 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-08-19 12:17:00 AM  
Wildhorse Resort & Casino is open but the food court is closed until the investigation is complete.

We won't prevent people from gambling, but we will let them go hungry!
 
2022-08-19 12:19:38 AM  
He really thought he could rob a casino by himself. I bet it was funny once reality set in. Not funny for him, as much as funny for us.
 
2022-08-19 12:24:12 AM  
All I wanna do is...

*PEW*PEW *PEW *PEW*

Eat your bullets?

/no thank you
 
2022-08-19 12:33:20 AM  
Wild Horses: Heist
Youtube 6oOzAjPxJuk
 
2022-08-19 12:37:53 AM  
Forget it Jake, it's Oregon.

/Oregonian
 
2022-08-19 12:41:03 AM  
Sucks for the bystander. Hopefully they weren't on their way out after losing this months mortgage too.
 
2022-08-19 12:56:32 AM  
Planning a Heist - Key & Peele
Youtube jgYYOUC10aM
 
2022-08-19 1:05:48 AM  
He really thought he could rob a casino by himself.

See, this is the harm of GTA. It teaches kids that you can pull off complex heists without at least a snarky drill operator and a guy named Hans
 
2022-08-19 1:09:20 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


It may not be the best plan, but Randy just shot the casino map, so it'll have to do.
 
2022-08-19 1:25:12 AM  
Of all the places I would consider robbing if I were a career thief, a casino would be pretty low on the list.
 
2022-08-19 1:30:28 AM  

Combustion: He really thought he could rob a casino by himself. I bet it was funny once reality set in. Not funny for him, as much as funny for us.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-08-19 1:41:26 AM  

ToughActinProlactin: Of all the places I would consider robbing if I were a career thief, a casino would be pretty low on the list.


When I was a teenager I was going to apply for a job at the local grocery store, my dad argued against getting a job there without explaining why. I assumed he knew the boss was a jerk or something. A few years later, I asked my dad why he didn't want me working there. It turns out, my dad had a hunch the place was overdue for an armed robbery. The place did a huge cash business on Fridays. It was a block from the intersection of two interstates, as well as a train station, so it was perfect for making a quick getaway. Apparently, my dad spent his free time casing joints for hypothetical robberies.
 
2022-08-19 3:06:23 AM  
There is an armoured car that refills several ATMs in my small town on Sunday nights around 11:00.

We need to time this with the CN rail traffic.  Need someone to hack into the switching system to ensure the train stops on the track so police can't get downtown in a hurry.  Need someone on the inside with the forest service to open and close the gate on the logging road "back way" out of town.  Need two guys good with guns but who are stable and calm enough to know when not to use them. Need a guy with an acetelyne torch.  And of course a driver.

/assembling a 6-man crew
//plot twist -- we're actually robbing the CN train.  The armoured car robbery  is a decoy.
///one last score and then I'm out
 
2022-08-19 5:30:57 AM  

Psychopompous: [Fark user image 850x566]

It may not be the best plan, but Randy just shot the casino map, so it'll have to do.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-08-19 6:08:55 AM  

Combustion: He really thought he could rob a casino by himself. I bet it was funny once reality set in. Not funny for him, as much as funny for us.


Kind of like the dumbass last week who thought he could break into a FBI building with a nail gun.
 
2022-08-19 6:38:57 AM  
Thieves is really good. It has everything. Twists, larceny, a huge plan, the scrambling for Plans B through E. Shocking alliances! Death! Sick ass-stunts! Switcharoos!

S.Korean heist films are their own thing.
 
2022-08-19 6:43:50 AM  

Psychopompous: ToughActinProlactin: Of all the places I would consider robbing if I were a career thief, a casino would be pretty low on the list.

When I was a teenager I was going to apply for a job at the local grocery store, my dad argued against getting a job there without explaining why. I assumed he knew the boss was a jerk or something. A few years later, I asked my dad why he didn't want me working there. It turns out, my dad had a hunch the place was overdue for an armed robbery. The place did a huge cash business on Fridays. It was a block from the intersection of two interstates, as well as a train station, so it was perfect for making a quick getaway. Apparently, my dad spent his free time casing joints for hypothetical robberies.


I think this is the kind of sh*t you ponder when you have kids.  They want to get a job somewhere and you immediately wonder, "Is it safe?"

Though I wouldn't know....

I worked at a hair salon, and part of my job was to do the daily deposit.  I'd walk the half block to the bank and walk back.  One day I showed up about an hour before an armed robbery went down.

When we heard about it the next day (small town) my boss forbade me from ever doing the deposit again.  I laughed and explained that I did my own banking there too!  I'm not going to be afraid to go into my own bank.  Nope.  She did it herself from then on.

My own mother could not have given a sh*t less.
 
2022-08-19 8:01:01 AM  
Ocean's Eleven't
 
2022-08-19 8:18:22 AM  
If you throw Millie Bobby Brown in the sea, you get Oceans Eleven
 
2022-08-19 11:54:49 AM  

Bill_Wick's_Friend: There is an armoured car that refills several ATMs in my small town on Sunday nights around 11:00.

We need to time this with the CN rail traffic.  Need someone to hack into the switching system to ensure the train stops on the track so police can't get downtown in a hurry.  Need someone on the inside with the forest service to open and close the gate on the logging road "back way" out of town.  Need two guys good with guns but who are stable and calm enough to know when not to use them. Need a guy with an acetelyne torch.  And of course a driver.

/assembling a 6-man crew
//plot twist -- we're actually robbing the CN train.  The armoured car robbery  is a decoy.
///one last score and then I'm out


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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