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(Twitter)   I'm Eric. I'm a storyteller   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, shot  
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4987 clicks; posted to Politics » on 16 Aug 2022 at 6:42 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



91 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2022-08-15 9:44:19 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-08-15 10:21:25 PM  
img-9gag-fun.9cache.comView Full Size
 
2022-08-15 10:25:14 PM  
Did they call you sir and have tears in their eyes?
 
2022-08-15 10:35:08 PM  
Typical welfare queen always seeking a handout
 
2022-08-15 11:07:09 PM  
A grammar-optional life is not worth living, Eric.
 
2022-08-15 11:24:24 PM  
Your daddy will never love you, ERIC.  You have even less of a chance than Half-Scoop.

/Are you and Lumpy scared ERIC? You should be.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-08-16 2:46:34 AM  
I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.
 
2022-08-16 2:51:11 AM  

433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.


Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-08-16 2:54:24 AM  

MrBallou: 433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.

Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.


I also think he was a terrible president, possibly the worst we've had, but I don't believe in the pee tape.
 
2022-08-16 2:56:01 AM  
Poor I'm Eric, can't even go to dinner without the entire restaurant breaking out in a brawl about who gets to pick up his check.

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2022-08-16 2:59:21 AM  
I believe that story actually. The Trump cult would deem it an honor to spend their money buying his kids dinner. The only part I don't believe is that he didn't let them.
 
2022-08-16 3:07:26 AM  

433: MrBallou: 433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.

Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.

I also think he was a terrible president, possibly the worst we've had, but I don't believe in the pee tape.


But do you believe him capable it it?

Honestly, maybe not. The perverted thrill of having somebody pee on Obama's bed seems a little too cerebral for Dumb Donnie.

Definitely the worst. None of the others have defiled the office or been overt criminals like he has.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-08-16 3:14:36 AM  

MrBallou: But do you believe him capable it it?


It's a better story to sell to people who want to believe than any actual reality, like getting sued by a woman hired for sex and then sues you and does the classic, "he's got a weird dick y'all!" move, or divorcing your wife while she's pregnant so you can marry a model.  I mean, usually, that's pretty bad.  I don't want to repeat voices who have already covered this ground, but I really don't think I want Donald Trump to run for president again.

And I think he looks weird.  It's not just me, right?
 
2022-08-16 3:37:51 AM  
But we had trouble deciding what to order so they said "then can we order ours while you think about it." And I said golly no, you just wait your turn.

b.zmtcdn.comView Full Size

It's a complicated choice.
 
2022-08-16 3:50:05 AM  

433: MrBallou: But do you believe him capable it it?

It's a better story to sell to people who want to believe than any actual reality, like getting sued by a woman hired for sex and then sues you and does the classic, "he's got a weird dick y'all!" move, or divorcing your wife while she's pregnant so you can marry a model.  I mean, usually, that's pretty bad.  I don't want to repeat voices who have already covered this ground, but I really don't think I want Donald Trump to run for president again.

And I think he looks weird.  It's not just me, right?


It's not you. He's it an admirable person.

/my previous, more to the point comment got deleted because I called the asshole something worse, in the censor's eyes, than asshole
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-08-16 4:03:01 AM  

MrBallou: It's not you. He's it an admirable person.


Oh good.  I was holding out on him, thinking he might finally pivot.  This recent turn of events really seals the deal.  I always knew there was something off about him.

Aside, there must be a word in some other language for the small amount of pity I have for the kids.  It's like in the book Quantum of Solace, not the movie.  Like you'd feel bad for Eric that he died in the fire with everyone else, but not like you'd want to hang out if he'd lived.
 
2022-08-16 4:06:53 AM  

433: MrBallou: It's not you. He's it an admirable person.

Oh good.  I was holding out on him, thinking he might finally pivot.  This recent turn of events really seals the deal.  I always knew there was something off about him.

Aside, there must be a word in some other language for the small amount of pity I have for the kids.  It's like in the book Quantum of Solace, not the movie.  Like you'd feel bad for Eric that he died in the fire with everyone else, but not like you'd want to hang out if he'd lived.


You'd feel best if he'd died in childbirth, untainted by the rest of the family.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-08-16 4:17:43 AM  

MrBallou: 433: MrBallou: It's not you. He's it an admirable person.

Oh good.  I was holding out on him, thinking he might finally pivot.  This recent turn of events really seals the deal.  I always knew there was something off about him.

Aside, there must be a word in some other language for the small amount of pity I have for the kids.  It's like in the book Quantum of Solace, not the movie.  Like you'd feel bad for Eric that he died in the fire with everyone else, but not like you'd want to hang out if he'd lived.

You'd feel best if he'd died in childbirth, untainted by the rest of the family.


Well.
 
2022-08-16 6:44:40 AM  

MrBallou: 433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.

Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.


Tiffany wants nothing to do with Two Scoops and seems to have lived a decent life
 
2022-08-16 6:47:17 AM  

anuran: MrBallou: 433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.

Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.

Tiffany wants nothing to do with Two Scoops and seems to have lived a decent life


...for a spoiled white model's daughter, anyway.
 
2022-08-16 6:48:28 AM  

anuran: Tiffany wants nothing to do with Two Scoops and seems to have lived a decent life


This isn't true at all.
 
2022-08-16 6:49:10 AM  
Any time that anyone says the phrase "tell your / my story" or something similar...it's an indicator that they are selling MLM, or similar, shiat and should not be trusted
 
2022-08-16 6:49:18 AM  

cretinbob: [img-9gag-fun.9cache.com image 460x560]


Listening to Slaughter to Prevail when I saw that, LMAO.  That's a keeper.
 
2022-08-16 6:50:15 AM  
...and then everybody clapped.

Its bullshiat. He's trying to make buying him dinner a thing as a Friday because he's broke AF.
 
2022-08-16 6:52:38 AM  

markie_farkie: Did they call you sir and have tears in their eyes?


The husband was the biggest, butchest marine you could ever imagine. You could see his toned muscles rippling underneath a tailored Pal Zileri shirt. He had the kind of arms that make you beg to be enveloped by them until you feel things that are wrong but oh so right.
 
2022-08-16 6:56:43 AM  
You fools underestimate the power of chaotic stupid. You think Don Jr is the heir? Don Sr wasn't supposed to be the heir - his brother was, Fred Trump Jr., groomed to take the reigns of sleaze from his father the Klansman, son of a pimp. But Fred Jr. didn't inherit anything because he drank himself to death. Similarly Don Jr will flame out in a coke binge, snorting so much that he vibrates himself into a state of pure energy and disappears in a flash of gamma rays. It is Eric who will rise to show the world that idiocracy was a starry-eyed utopian dream of boundless optimism.

You have been warned.
 
2022-08-16 6:56:54 AM  

Alphax: cretinbob: [img-9gag-fun.9cache.com image 460x560]

Listening to Slaughter to Prevail when I saw that, LMAO.  That's a keeper.


Seriously, i did not think i would be able to actually laugh out loud this morning.
Once again, Fark proves me wrong.

/thank you cretinbob
 
2022-08-16 6:59:25 AM  
And the Constitution stood up and clapped
 
2022-08-16 7:01:34 AM  
farking teary eyed love trope.
 
2022-08-16 7:04:07 AM  

I Browse: I believe that story actually. The Trump cult would deem it an honor to spend their money buying his kids dinner. The only part I don't believe is that he didn't let them.


Most of the Trump cult - particularly of the ilk that would pay for Eric's hand-tossed Trou du Cul Frit - wouldn't be allowed in the kind of restaurant that Eric would dine in.

No shirt, no shoes, no service.

/Clown shirt, clown shoes, clown service.
 
2022-08-16 7:04:17 AM  
 
2022-08-16 7:06:36 AM  
I believe him because Trump supporters are that stupid and cult like, I can believe two of them were fighting over who paid for Eric's dinner. The whole MAGA movement is that stupid.
 
2022-08-16 7:07:29 AM  
This would be the guy caught stealing lemonade using a cup for free water, but sure, he tried to turn down a free meal.


/More likely what happened was someone told him to go eat shiat.
 
2022-08-16 7:07:39 AM  
Every story has a kernel of truth. Eric was spotted walking to a private dinning area. A MAGAit tried to by him a Bud lite lime. Eric asked that someone watch the door to the dinning area.
 
2022-08-16 7:08:52 AM  

heavymetal: Trump supporters are that stupid and cult like


I didn't know the filter replaced the n in that word with an l.
 
2022-08-16 7:12:32 AM  
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2022-08-16 7:15:40 AM  
What are the odds they went out to dinner with friends and there was brief conversation about who was getting a check?

Even if it did take place, however, such discussion does not prove your father innocent of treason.
 
2022-08-16 7:15:45 AM  
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2022-08-16 7:18:55 AM  
Do they serve "dinner" at hipster coffeeshops?
 
2022-08-16 7:20:16 AM  
I'm sure his dad will slap him upside the head for not taking the meal.
"I only like sons who don't pay for meals." DJT
 
2022-08-16 7:20:48 AM  
It's a shame someone had to pay for a meal that consisted primarily of restaurant staff spit, jizz, and ass hairs.
 
2022-08-16 7:22:31 AM  
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2022-08-16 7:27:38 AM  

433: MrBallou: 433: I sure do not like Donald Trump and his family.  Thought you guys should know.

Every turd that came from that asshole is a stinker.

I also think he was a terrible president, possibly the worst we've had, but I don't believe in the pee tape.


I can believe in the tape, but that it's Trump doing the peeing. It's metaphorically what he's done to the country for most of his life.
 
2022-08-16 7:35:40 AM  
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2022-08-16 7:40:37 AM  
Had nothing to do with Mar A Lardo. They were proud of him for making a hell of an effort with that fork. Nearly got through the entire dinner without getting pasta in his hair.

Folks used to do nice things like that for "specials" all the time.
 
2022-08-16 7:41:04 AM  

no1curr: Typical welfare queen always seeking a handout


He didn't get so rich by paying a bunch of restaurant bills!

//he got rich by being born
///like most of them do
 
2022-08-16 7:42:49 AM  

heavymetal: I believe him because Trump supporters are that stupid and cult like, I can believe two of them were fighting over who paid for Eric's dinner. The whole MAGA movement is that stupid.


A gentleman would have insisted on paying for both of their meals instead.

Instead, he probably insisted on paying the tip and then left three dollars.
 
2022-08-16 7:50:09 AM  
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2022-08-16 7:59:05 AM  
So, who's going to buy me dinner to apologize for what the Trumps have done to this country?
 
2022-08-16 8:03:20 AM  

Great_Milenko: heavymetal: I believe him because Trump supporters are that stupid and cult like, I can believe two of them were fighting over who paid for Eric's dinner. The whole MAGA movement is that stupid.

A gentleman would have insisted on paying for both of their meals instead.

Instead, he probably insisted on paying the tip and then left three dollars.


Eric was probably relieved because his credit card is nearing the limit.
 
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