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(Zillow)   They really should have advertised this as an awesome cave hideaway with a nice if boring house attached   (zillow.com) divider line
    More: Cool, Window, Water information, Insulated glazing, Virtual tour, Laundry Room, Glass, Double Pane Windows, Exterior features  
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5616 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Aug 2022 at 9:56 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



40 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-08-10 10:01:21 PM  
At least you have someplace cool to live in during the summer.
 
2022-08-10 10:02:11 PM  
c.tenor.comView Full Size
 
2022-08-10 10:03:55 PM  
Watch out for the creepers.
 
2022-08-10 10:05:30 PM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size


Perfect for entertaining!
 
2022-08-10 10:05:59 PM  
Yeah, but it's in Texas.
 
2022-08-10 10:06:18 PM  

Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: Yeah, but it's in Texas.


^ This
 
2022-08-10 10:07:54 PM  

Micosavo: Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: Yeah, but it's in Texas.

^ This


It's alright.  If you don't want to move to TX, all the California people will do it for you.
 
2022-08-10 10:08:18 PM  
Do architects/designers no longer get any training in proportion?

What's up with the cavernous living room with doll furniture smooshed up in all the corners?

Is that how people really use those spaces? is it nice to sit 40 feet away from a fireplace?
 
2022-08-10 10:08:44 PM  
It has a Lair? And it's only 875k? That's a steal!


Oh. It's in Texas. Pass.
 
2022-08-10 10:09:47 PM  
Cave looks perfect for some illegal abortions.
 
2022-08-10 10:10:25 PM  
Allegory of the cave update, man returns to the cave and tells everyone to stick with the shadows on the cave wall it's frigging Texas out there.
 
2022-08-10 10:10:52 PM  
What the. Damn, well I'd be worried about a sink hole taking the house in. But I guess they probably check for that sort of thing.
 
2022-08-10 10:12:35 PM  
I stalagmite buy it, but I think i am too stalactite.
 
2022-08-10 10:13:04 PM  
Live in Texas? Not even if the gave it to me.
 
2022-08-10 10:16:21 PM  

mcsiegs: I stalagmite buy it, but I think i am too stalactite.


Gneiss.
 
2022-08-10 10:20:22 PM  
It's in San Antonio?  Cave would be perfect for hosting a party with some big ole women.
 
2022-08-10 10:25:48 PM  
I farking love big cities in Texas. San Antonio is great. I also like caves. However, that's a lot of lawn to wreck the environment to keep watered, mowed, and weed-free and I'm short about $835,000
 
2022-08-10 10:38:40 PM  

Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: Yeah, but it's in Texas.


That and the house is hideous
 
2022-08-10 10:44:57 PM  
Years ago my mom was looking for a new house for us.  We looked at this place out in the boonies that said, "House, some fire damage in basement, barn, small dam".

We showed up.  The house was way too small.  The fire damage was just beams, but the house really was nearly a tear down...  I think it was 2 bedrooms, but they were both really small, 1 bath, tiny living room and kitchen.

Okay, well, we were there, so we looked.  We couldn't find the barn at first.  It was overrun by weeds.  It was this tiny little 10x10 carriage house that was absolutely something you would tear down.  Not even useful for parking a lawn tractor in.  Your shovel and rake would catch tetanus you left them out in it and if you sneeze inside, despite all the gaps in the wood, the air pressure would have knocked it down.  So, on to look at the "small dam"... I mean, we weren't completely against the idea of a tear down, and it have 3 1/4 acres or something like that.  A dam meant a creek or something.  That might be nice.

We walked out into the woods and found a 20 foot high, 30 foot long stone work dam (It would, if restored, have had another 10 feet of wood planks to control the water levels.)  Good sized pond behind it.  Water was pouring through the sluice area, or whatever that's called.  It wasn't obvious whether the mechanism to stop that was functioning or if it was just permanently in the open position.  Our best guess is that the pond behind it had once been used as an ice harvesting pond.  No gearing hooked up to the dam or anything.  Couple really nice creeks feeding into it.

On the billion dollar lottery thread the other day, I forgot to mention, if I won a billion dollars I'd dig a large basin, buy and move that dam to the middle of the basin, and have a swimming pond at one end.  I'd install a pump and all day my solar panels would pump water up, and all night I'd let it run down through a generator.  Where it was, I think there was actually probably enough natural flow to power several houses, but liability on a propper dam (that's why I'd put the whole thing in a basin) is crazy.  If it wasn't so far out (40 minutes from where I'd prefer to live) I'd even live there.

We ended up bidding on another house, that had 5 bedrooms, a large living room, large kitchen, large study, large random room, an attack that could have been finished, and a partially finished dry basement.  It was a 40x40 colonial, newly remodeled, with what could have been turned into living space on 4 floors (although a large rock took that was too big to move for the foundation took a corner out of the basement and jutted up in the front yard.)  In the end we lost out on that because they wouldn't come down from $85k to $80k and we didn't have the extra $5k and the bank wouldn't loan it to us (for you city folk... yes, at least in the early 90s you could find a house with 3200 sq. feet finished and nearly another 3200 finishable, and a 20x40 front porch for under $100k... it also had a two story 40x20 barn in pretty good shape (like many barns it would have needed some joist jacking up to deal with a little sag in the middle, but overall, in good enough shape so we could have insulated it, run plumbing out there and turned it into living space.  You just have to go out to the middle of a town in the middle of nowhere.
 
2022-08-10 10:51:20 PM  

HighZoolander: Do architects/designers no longer get any training in proportion?

What's up with the cavernous living room with doll furniture smooshed up in all the corners?

Is that how people really use those spaces? is it nice to sit 40 feet away from a fireplace?


It's probably just staged by the RE agent after the owners have moved out.  Honestly, some of the recent zillow fark postings for homes that were...maybe not 'nice', but not meth shacks...have had some weird photo stuff going on.  I can't tell if it's the lighting or lens used or post-processing by someone messing with the levels to brighten stuff, but it almost looks rendered sometimes...like the angles of furniture edges or pictures on the walls or whatever look slightly off.  Maybe it is rendered?  I dunno, but whatever the case is, however the room is being presented probably isn't the work of a designer and more the work of a RE agent doing the minimum needed to display it for sale.
 
2022-08-10 11:18:21 PM  
I'd like to think they would use the cave as a cooling system for the house....But seeing as that
didn't burn copious amounts of  fossil fuel to do, they wouldn't opt for that...Seriously though..A
solar powered blower drawing cool air from the cave would save a FORTUNE...
 
2022-08-10 11:26:24 PM  
no one going to mention that it's also in HOA territory? double pass, despite the cool factors
 
2022-08-10 11:26:31 PM  
It's still in Texas. No thanks.
 
2022-08-10 11:29:54 PM  

Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: Yeah, but it's in Texas.


With a $400 per year HOA fee.

Texas and an HOA?  I'll pass.
 
2022-08-10 11:45:12 PM  

little big man: At least you have someplace cool to live in during the summer.


That cave is sweaty hot guaranteed. There are caves nearby I toured that by the time I was done my goonch had a natural sous vide like I've never experienced.
 
2022-08-10 11:46:51 PM  
Sinkhole: The property!
 
2022-08-11 12:09:44 AM  
You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
 
2022-08-11 12:19:06 AM  

HighZoolander: Do architects/designers no longer get any training in proportion?

What's up with the cavernous living room with doll furniture smooshed up in all the corners?

Is that how people really use those spaces? is it nice to sit 40 feet away from a fireplace?


While it is large, keep in mind that every single one of those photographs was taken with a fish eye lens. Everything outside of the center of the picture stretches more the closer you get to the edge.
 
2022-08-11 12:22:25 AM  

Mr. Shabooboo: I'd like to think they would use the cave as a cooling system for the house....But seeing as that
didn't burn copious amounts of  fossil fuel to do, they wouldn't opt for that...Seriously though..A
solar powered blower drawing cool air from the cave would save a FORTUNE...


Yeah but you'd still need a hell of a dehumidifier, and at that point you're basically back at a/c.
 
2022-08-11 12:27:21 AM  

bluenovaman: little big man: At least you have someplace cool to live in during the summer.

That cave is sweaty hot guaranteed. There are caves nearby I toured that by the time I was done my goonch had a natural sous vide like I've never experienced.


I went to Ruby Falls in Tennessee a few years ago.  Beautiful place, though Chattanooga in the summer is a biatch like the rest of the south...the tour guide said the cave stays 58 degrees year round, you best believe my big ass was happy!

Turns out, 58 degrees with 95% humidity and dead still air is a biatch, too. Came out looking like I'd been swimming.

Still worth it though.
 
2022-08-11 12:36:10 AM  

deadsanta: Sinkhole: The property!


Isn't there a lot of fracking that goes on in Texas? Or am I thinking of somewhere else?
 
2022-08-11 3:49:25 AM  
Almost a million? I'll just keep saving until I can afford this: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Predjama_Castle
 
2022-08-11 4:22:40 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Looking for a lair.
 
2022-08-11 6:46:00 AM  

bluenovaman: little big man: At least you have someplace cool to live in during the summer.

That cave is sweaty hot guaranteed. There are caves nearby I toured that by the time I was done my goonch had a natural sous vide like I've never experienced.


I've done a fair amount of caving n the Texas Hill Country.  If it's a very small cave, you could be right but it looks large enough to be that it will be cool.
 
2022-08-11 7:18:55 AM  
The fark?
 
2022-08-11 7:58:36 AM  

mcsiegs: I stalagmite buy it, but I think i am too stalactite.


I'd spelunk a few dollars on it.
 
2022-08-11 8:18:05 AM  

Mr. Shabooboo: I'd like to think they would use the cave as a cooling system for the house....But seeing as that
didn't burn copious amounts of  fossil fuel to do, they wouldn't opt for that...Seriously though..A
solar powered blower drawing cool air from the cave would save a FORTUNE...


MMM. Nice refreshing cave air blowing into your house. In San Antonio.
 
2022-08-11 8:51:52 AM  
That house:

"Give me the lowest-end builder-spec special, please"
 
2022-08-11 10:15:52 AM  
Cave party??? CAVE PARTY!!!!
 
2022-08-11 12:00:17 PM  
Someone trapped down there could scream and scream and never be heard.
 
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