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(Guardian)   Police warn intruder that they may have caught fatal herpes infection from macaque   (theguardian.com) divider line
    More: Creepy, Launceston, Tasmania, Macaque, monkey enclosure, city of Launceston council, Herpesviridae, Primate, herpes virus, Influenza  
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2280 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Aug 2022 at 6:20 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



30 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-08-10 5:16:49 PM  
64.media.tumblr.comView Full Size


/couldn't find an actual youtube link of the herpes scene
 
2022-08-10 6:24:47 PM  
Next time use condom
 
2022-08-10 6:28:34 PM  

LewDux: Next time use condom


You ever trying getting macaque in a condom?

This one is great. Macaque is huge, some are saying.
 
2022-08-10 6:30:22 PM  
Don't taunt the herpes monkey?
 
2022-08-10 6:31:03 PM  
Or, maybe just pull out?

/got nuthin'
 
2022-08-10 6:31:18 PM  
time with macaque is worth it
 
2022-08-10 6:33:30 PM  
FTA -
Certain species have even developed so far to learn to live with humans - and have sometimes become invasive in some human-settled environments, such as the island of Mauritius and Silver Springs State Park in Florida.
Florida got the herp....
 
2022-08-10 6:34:03 PM  
Damn dirty apes...
 
2022-08-10 6:35:50 PM  
I'm never heard that nickname for your mom, subby
 
2022-08-10 6:38:01 PM  
Maybe it was an antivaxxer trying to get "natural immunity" to the Monkeypox?
 
2022-08-10 6:38:36 PM  
I wonder if they have a version of HIPAA.  I know we make an exception for gunshots, but I think you could make an argument that, since they could pose a health risk to others this would actually be a good place to have HIPAA style rules so the suspect seeks medical attention.
 
2022-08-10 6:41:20 PM  
Regular herpes, "herpes" herpes, or space herpes?

/asking for a friend
 
2022-08-10 6:42:45 PM  
I heard he farked an ostrich.
 
2022-08-10 6:43:58 PM  
This was a very continental monkey. His name was Jacques. He also spent some time in Germany, and was given the surname in tribute of the great David Hasselhoff, shortened to simply "Hoff" for brevity.

Jacques Macaque Hoff
 
2022-08-10 6:44:51 PM  
Not just any herpes. It's herpes simplex 12.
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2022-08-10 6:45:17 PM  

jack_o_the_hills: Regular herpes, "herpes" herpes, or space herpes?

/asking for a friend


Avian herpes.
"Chirpes"
 
2022-08-10 6:45:48 PM  
I did the same. Macaque turned a strange color
 
2022-08-10 6:49:09 PM  

EBN-OZN: Not just any herpes. It's herpes simplex 12.
[Fark user image 850x477]


Better check himself out with his physician before thing start falling off on the man.
 
2022-08-10 6:49:15 PM  
I'm just glad that they warned the intruder.
 
2022-08-10 6:51:20 PM  

jack_o_the_hills: Regular herpes, "herpes" herpes, or space herpes?

/asking for a friend


HerpagonosyphiliAIDS?
 
2022-08-10 6:53:05 PM  
This spinning rock hurtling through space sure is a crazy f*cked up place.
 
2022-08-10 6:54:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-08-10 6:56:54 PM  
That's a long way to go for a very small amount of money. Which makes me suspect it was someone who has very little or no money. Either a child or a completely destitute and desperate adult.
 
2022-08-10 7:07:44 PM  
As you can clearly see, the virus has inflamed the head of macaque

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2022-08-10 7:16:29 PM  
And then, 28 days later...

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-08-10 7:48:19 PM  

JustHereForThePics: This was a very continental monkey. His name was Jacques. He also spent some time in Germany, and was given the surname in tribute of the great David Hasselhoff, shortened to simply "Hoff" for brevity.

Jacques Macaque Hoff


monkeyrimshot.gif
 
2022-08-10 7:57:47 PM  
Hands off macaque!
 
2022-08-10 8:20:05 PM  
George Allen introduces Macaca
Youtube r90z0PMnKwI
 
2022-08-10 10:11:42 PM  

yellowjester: FTA -
Certain species have even developed so far to learn to live with humans - and have sometimes become invasive in some human-settled environments, such as the island of Mauritius and Silver Springs State Park in Florida.
Florida got the herp....


They need to all br euthanized.
 
2022-08-11 8:32:25 AM  

Vtimlin: yellowjester: FTA -
Certain species have even developed so far to learn to live with humans - and have sometimes become invasive in some human-settled environments, such as the island of Mauritius and Silver Springs State Park in Florida.
Florida got the herp....

They need to all br euthanized.


Hey now, I have friends in Mauritius.

But yeah, euthanizing Florida? It's what the world needs to do to survive. The needs of the many etc.
 
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