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(Irish Mirror)   Hello this is your Captain speaking: We're just about out of fuel and there's no runway to land on at the airport. Terrified passengers: PANIC   (irishmirror.ie) divider line
    More: Scary, Aer Lingus, Aer Lingus flight, Irish holidaymakers, Republic of Ireland, Shannon Airport, Ireland, Dublin Airport, Irish Mirror  
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4150 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Jul 2022 at 10:20 AM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



61 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2022-07-22 8:26:05 AM  
No runway? No problem!

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2022-07-22 8:30:43 AM  
But the airline saved a bundle on unleaded.
 
2022-07-22 8:51:54 AM  
This is my fear of a plane crash. Not the crash itself.

But the god damn annoyance of so many people
 
2022-07-22 10:10:56 AM  
Found the culprit:

Fark user imageView Full Size


/"my job, my way"
 
2022-07-22 10:21:59 AM  
Cue the bouncing boobies from "Airplane".
First boobies I ever saw on the big screen.
I was like 13 and in awe.
media3.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 10:25:53 AM  
preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 10:25:57 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 10:27:41 AM  
Every day there's a FUD article about flying. I think they're being pushed by airports and airlines that are insanely understaffed right now.
 
2022-07-22 10:30:14 AM  
My favorite quote from the series: "Mayday: Airline Disaster Investigation"--some British pilot comes on and very Britishly says "This is your captain. We seem to be having a bit of a problem, we've lost power in all four engines."

Oh, yes, a bit of a problem. Just a spot of trouble, dash it all.

Then they landed the plane anyway, those damn Limeys!
 
2022-07-22 10:30:37 AM  
A.  Why didn't you have enough fuel to loiter?

B.  Why didn't you ask Dublin for priority because you were low on fuel?

C.  Why the hell is Dublin's largest runway tied up for so long at 2:00 am that it takes less fuel to divert to Shannon?
 
2022-07-22 10:32:12 AM  

Halfabee64: A.  Why didn't you have enough fuel to loiter?

B.  Why didn't you ask Dublin for priority because you were low on fuel?

C.  Why the hell is Dublin's largest runway tied up for so long at 2:00 am that it takes less fuel to divert to Shannon?


Probably because every 'fact' presented in the article was complete BS.
 
2022-07-22 10:33:48 AM  
Wait until they hear we're out of decaf...
 
2022-07-22 10:36:37 AM  
That's the last time I fly Aer Lingus. It's Cun Lingus from now on.
 
2022-07-22 10:37:05 AM  
Interesting to see an Aer Lingus headline that's not Cunning.
 
2022-07-22 10:40:47 AM  
Was on a flight over Lake Michigan when the pilot came on "This is your captain.  We have a slight problem...." (pause, pause, pause, pause) "... our coffee maker is out of order.  We apologize for the inconvenience."

I turned to the person next to me "He didn't tell us that the coffee maker is powered by the main engines."
 
2022-07-22 10:41:42 AM  

notmyjab: Was on a flight over Lake Michigan when the pilot came on "This is your captain.  We have a slight problem...." (pause, pause, pause, pause) "... our coffee maker is out of order.  We apologize for the inconvenience."

I turned to the person next to me "He didn't tell us that the coffee maker is powered by the main engines."


Everything's powered by the engines.
 
2022-07-22 10:45:26 AM  
Shannon used to be the refueling stop for trips from the US and Canada to Europe.  Greenest place on earth.
 
2022-07-22 10:48:59 AM  

Halfabee64: A.  Why didn't you have enough fuel to loiter?

B.  Why didn't you ask Dublin for priority because you were low on fuel?

C.  Why the hell is Dublin's largest runway tied up for so long at 2:00 am that it takes less fuel to divert to Shannon?


A. They had reserve fuel to loiter, but evidently not enough for the expected delay at Dublin.  About 45 minutes of extra fuel is often all you have.

B. You can ask for all the priority you want but if the runway isn't available, you can't land.

C. If a previous plane had a malfunction that dug gouges in the runway or dropped hundreds of metal parts in the middle of the night, it will take a long time to get the runway ready for air traffic again. Certainly longer than 45 minutes.
 
2022-07-22 10:49:34 AM  

Russ1642: notmyjab: Was on a flight over Lake Michigan when the pilot came on "This is your captain.  We have a slight problem...." (pause, pause, pause, pause) "... our coffee maker is out of order.  We apologize for the inconvenience."

I turned to the person next to me "He didn't tell us that the coffee maker is powered by the main engines."

Everything's powered by the engines.


It wasn't a great joke, but it was a good joke. A happy little flower in the joyless, weed strewn abandoned parking lot that is life in late stage capitalism.

If no one likes a joke explainer, how do you think they feel about joke correctors?
 
2022-07-22 10:50:52 AM  

Singleballtheory: Wait until they hear we're out of decaf...


Came for this, but I thought it was just coffee, not decaf specifically.
 
2022-07-22 10:53:50 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 10:55:23 AM  

DanInKansas: Russ1642: notmyjab: Was on a flight over Lake Michigan when the pilot came on "This is your captain.  We have a slight problem...." (pause, pause, pause, pause) "... our coffee maker is out of order.  We apologize for the inconvenience."

I turned to the person next to me "He didn't tell us that the coffee maker is powered by the main engines."

Everything's powered by the engines.

It wasn't a great joke, but it was a good joke. A happy little flower in the joyless, weed strewn abandoned parking lot that is life in late stage capitalism.

If no one likes a joke explainer, how do you think they feel about joke correctors?


You were trying to be funny? Oh, well good for you. Keep trying and don't give up. Eventually you'll get there.
 
2022-07-22 11:04:09 AM  

optikeye: But the airline saved a bundle on unleaded.


Not far from the truth actually.

Don't know if this is still current, but airlines at least used to carry as little fuel as possible during routes. It takes more fuel to haul more fuel (weight), so the less you carry, you're doubly better off. The trick is then they'd declare a 'fuel emergency' in order to move themselves further ahead in the line of planes waiting to land.

Yes, airlines really did jeopardize your life in order to save a few bucks.
 
2022-07-22 11:06:22 AM  
I looked up the plane info, looks like they're (Aer Lingus) leasing it until they have their own staff to handle it.

https://www.flightradar24.com/data/aircraft/ec-mua

Same company that does the great Rwandan deportation flights!
 
2022-07-22 11:09:58 AM  
Check it, bleed. Bro... was ON! Didn't trip. But the folks was freakin', Man. Hey, and the pilots were laid to the bone, Homes.  So Blood hammered out and jammed jet ship. Tightened that bad sucker inside the runway like a mother. shiat.
 
2022-07-22 11:10:58 AM  
He's definitely a cunning Lingus pilot!
 
2022-07-22 11:14:24 AM  
Omg, how is this not the first?
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2022-07-22 11:15:44 AM  
The pilot didn't have the experience to know he should declare the "E" word?  That would have cleared the runways.

None of this story makes sense: the plane is tens of thousands of pounds lighter after the international flight.  It should have landing ability at its destination airport.

/Unless the passengers drank all the beer and the plane got heavier ;=)
 
2022-07-22 11:16:33 AM  

LouisZepher: Singleballtheory: Wait until they hear we're out of decaf...

Came for this, but I thought it was just coffee, not decaf specifically.


It's quite possible.

As an aside, it was always a bit of an uproar whenever a waitress would mistakenly top off my mom's cup of decaf with a splash of the regular. Which perhaps explains why she needed to be drinking decaf in the first place.
 
2022-07-22 11:19:28 AM  
Hey, has anyone made a joke about the name of the airline yet?
 
2022-07-22 11:25:51 AM  
Peter's Car can Fly
Youtube 3eITK8neBVI
 
2022-07-22 11:27:33 AM  
I was hoping for a heartwarming story they dump the pilots' private whiskey into the fuel tank and safely make it to their destination
 
2022-07-22 11:33:10 AM  
Shirley they can't be serious.
 
2022-07-22 11:34:41 AM  

Singleballtheory: That's the last time I fly Aer Lingus. It's Cun Lingus from now on.


Every time I hear about that airline I think it should be "Air Dingus".
 
2022-07-22 11:36:27 AM  
Just switch to the spare fuel tank, like John Denver did.
 
2022-07-22 11:52:27 AM  

Singleballtheory: That's the last time I fly Aer Lingus. It's Cun Lingus from now on.


My aunt's late husband from Ireland liked to refer to Aer Lingus as Aer Fungus.
 
2022-07-22 11:55:55 AM  
A capitol airport with one runway and limits on nighttime use for noise issues because they built it too close to the city.
 
2022-07-22 12:00:54 PM  

wildcardjack: A capitol airport with one runway and limits on nighttime use for noise issues because they built it too close to the city.


Well, if you're going to crash in a fireball at least do it quietly, Baby's sleeping.
 
2022-07-22 12:08:19 PM  

Omnivorous: The pilot didn't have the experience to know he should declare the "E" word?  That would have cleared the runways.

None of this story makes sense: the plane is tens of thousands of pounds lighter after the international flight.  It should have landing ability at its destination airport.

/Unless the passengers drank all the beer and the plane got heavier ;=)


Clearly he had enough fuel to divert, so it doesn't seem like it constituted an emergency.
 
2022-07-22 12:14:29 PM  
When I read "Aer Lingus" I think "Cunni Reiki"
 
2022-07-22 12:26:44 PM  

DRTFA: Halfabee64: A.  Why didn't you have enough fuel to loiter?

B.  Why didn't you ask Dublin for priority because you were low on fuel?

C.  Why the hell is Dublin's largest runway tied up for so long at 2:00 am that it takes less fuel to divert to Shannon?

A. They had reserve fuel to loiter, but evidently not enough for the expected delay at Dublin.  About 45 minutes of extra fuel is often all you have.

B. You can ask for all the priority you want but if the runway isn't available, you can't land.

C. If a previous plane had a malfunction that dug gouges in the runway or dropped hundreds of metal parts in the middle of the night, it will take a long time to get the runway ready for air traffic again. Certainly longer than 45 minutes.


Sounds like good information to be notifying incoming planes about before they try to land. Maybe the airport is not able to contact them until they speak first?
 
2022-07-22 12:35:52 PM  

steklo: [Fark user image image 800x445]


I would like more information about this, please:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 12:39:54 PM  

johnny_vegas: steklo: [Fark user image image 800x445]

I would like more information about this, please:

[Fark user image 290x315]


Fark is not your personal erotica site
 
2022-07-22 12:56:47 PM  

johnny_vegas: steklo: [Fark user image image 800x445]

I would like more information about this, please:

[Fark user image 290x315]


It looks like a Annie Leibovitz photo.

Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-22 1:07:07 PM  

optikeye: wildcardjack: A capitol airport with one runway and limits on nighttime use for noise issues because they built it too close to the city.

Well, if you're going to crash in a fireball at least do it quietly, Baby's sleeping.


No fuel, no fire. But still high G deceleration and lots of jagged metal bits.
 
2022-07-22 1:16:00 PM  

Tentacle: optikeye: wildcardjack: A capitol airport with one runway and limits on nighttime use for noise issues because they built it too close to the city.

Well, if you're going to crash in a fireball at least do it quietly, Baby's sleeping.

No fuel, no fire. But still high G deceleration and lots of jagged metal bits.


Yeah, sure if you run out of gas and want to be sure it's empty. Just take a match and give it a look.
 
2022-07-22 1:19:41 PM  
th.bing.comView Full Size

They had just enough to make it to the scene of the crash.
 
2022-07-22 1:29:14 PM  
Just think: aircraft are more fuel efficient carrying less fuel. So they try to carry minimum fuel.
 
2022-07-22 1:48:45 PM  
Shoehorn with Teeth
Youtube YBBu5FLGquE
 
2022-07-22 1:55:40 PM  
Wonder if they confused pounds of fuel for kilograms of fuel, like the Gimli Glider.
 
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