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(Reader's Digest)   Did you hear about the martial artists who fought on the beach? They faced off in sand-to-sand combat. It is your Bad Joke Thursday thread, have at it   (rd.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Laughter, Pun, Joke, Comedy, English-language films, BEACH LOVER, ocean puns, Shore  
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182 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 14 Jul 2022 at 7:05 AM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-07-14 12:09:53 AM  
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye, matey!
 
2022-07-14 12:10:21 AM  
What is a pirates favorite letter?
 
2022-07-14 1:19:30 AM  
After all those Hubble and Webb side-by-side photos showing how well cameras have improved, here's one more:

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2022-07-14 1:28:25 AM  
Why wouldn't the skeleton fight the martial artist?

...

...

...

He didn't have the guts.
 
2022-07-14 3:11:01 AM  
A time traveller.

Knock knock
 
2022-07-14 6:55:40 AM  
Why is Switzerland so great
Well, the flag's a real plus
 
2022-07-14 7:38:22 AM  
What's the difference between a peeping tom and a pickpocket?

The pickpocket snatches watches.
 
2022-07-14 7:45:09 AM  
My wife and I were having an argument and I told her that it was time that she needed to embrace her mistakes. She came over and hugged me.
 
2022-07-14 7:57:46 AM  
Goldstein and O'Brian were neighbors. They were always trying to one-up each other. One day they were both packing their cars for a family vacation. O'Brian's priest shows up and starts going around the car splashing it with holy water. Goldstein asked him what was going on. O'Brian says my priest is blessing the car for our trip. Well, Goldstein ran in the house and called his rabbi and told him to come to the house right away. Goldstein then tells the rabbi about the whole blessing thing and says we can't let these catholics show us up. You've got to do something, I want some sort of blessing for my car too. The rabbi thinks for a minute, goes out to the trunk of his car and comes back with a hacksaw. He climbs under the car and cuts 2 inches off of the tailpipe.
 
2022-07-14 8:17:45 AM  
What's the best time to visit your dentist?

2:30
 
2022-07-14 8:18:16 AM  
A guy walks into a bar... Ouch!
 
2022-07-14 9:03:31 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:03:54 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:04:09 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:05:05 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:05:27 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:05:48 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:06:14 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:30:03 AM  
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2022-07-14 9:32:02 AM  
Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.

After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, "Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.

The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.

As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His brother said, "Ya know, I'd heerd of that there Hind Lick Maneuver but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!"
 
2022-07-14 9:32:44 AM  
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