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(Lifehacker)   Depends. Either "I've been called worse by better people" or "something something, your momma, something something"   (lifehacker.com) divider line
    More: Followup, Insult, next insult, natural instinct, Amy Pritchett, tense situation, negative feedback, language organization, Dr. Neel Burton  
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305 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 06 Jul 2022 at 7:50 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



12 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-07-06 9:09:43 AM  
That's the best you can come up with? How sad.
 
2022-07-06 9:22:06 AM  
I usually just fire off a witty and biting response...12 to 18 hours later, when I'm alone.
 
2022-07-06 9:49:47 AM  
When the neighborhood 'roided out Nazi tried to pick a fight with me over the egregious crime of having my dog off leash, he insulted my hair and my glasses. Dude is bald and has a terrible beard, like most Nazis these days, so my first instinct was to respond with, "at least I have hair."

But instead, I just thanked him for his comments, and it completely flustered him to the point he threw his arms up and left.
 
2022-07-06 10:01:36 AM  
I usually plot a long and drawn out revenge scheme that involves me becoming a wealthy and titled nobleman of a small European principality.
 
2022-07-06 10:23:43 AM  
I laugh and say "That's a good one!" and walk away.  It throws people off completely.  And it really pisses people off that are trying to offend you.
 
2022-07-06 10:37:02 AM  
Roxanne-- epic joke scene
Youtube Z1nYEH6EDwM
 
2022-07-06 11:10:09 AM  

Slypork: [YouTube video: Roxanne-- epic joke scene]


I believe he actually does 24-25 better insults, instead of the required 20.:)

/really knows what she's doing
 
2022-07-06 12:34:35 PM  
" that might provoke me if I valued your opinion"
 
2022-07-06 12:34:54 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-06 12:41:08 PM  
I alway followed Jim Croce's philosophy: (paraphrasing) People can say whatever they want to say as long as they don't put their hands on me.


-----


All bets are off if they aim their bile at someone smaller and weaker than them in my presence. If it's an adult I will pause long enough to let the victim handle it their own way.
 
2022-07-06 1:11:33 PM  
Either ask with total seriousness: "How old are you??" 

Or just do this:
i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-06 2:58:18 PM  
I pee on their leg.
 
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