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    More: Followup, Ocean, Yachting, Yacht, Luxury yacht, Netherlands, manufacturer Oceanco, Jeff Bezos, historic Rotterdam bridge  
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5964 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jul 2022 at 1:17 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-07-03 9:00:03 PM  
The yacht, currently the second-largest in the world

SECOND? There's someone out there laughing at your manhood, Jeff! Your only recourse is a murder/suicide or you'll be flaccid for the rest of your life.
 
2022-07-03 9:06:19 PM  
Have fun sailing from the yard to the bridge and back!
 
2022-07-03 9:35:32 PM  
As soon as Climate Change stops, the waters will recede and you can sail it right out.
 
2022-07-03 9:36:37 PM  
morning headline: HISTORIC BRIDGE MYSTERIOUSLY VANISHES IN DEAD OF NIGHT
 
2022-07-03 9:42:37 PM  
Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.
 
2022-07-03 9:46:35 PM  
Hubris.
 
2022-07-03 9:57:09 PM  

bloobeary: morning headline: HISTORIC BRIDGE MYSTERIOUSLY VANISHES IN DEAD OF NIGHT


..appears in two days to a buyer in Topeka.
 
2022-07-03 10:07:15 PM  
Nice to see there are a few things money can't buy.  Well, at least not the amount he was offering.  I'm sure if he sweetens the deal, they'll re-think.
 
2022-07-03 10:29:23 PM  
He can easily afford to dig a canal around the bridge.
 
2022-07-03 10:35:23 PM  
Daniel Defoe covered this in Robinson Crusoe:

This at length put me upon thinking whether it was not possible to 
make myself a canoe, or periagua, such as the natives of those 
climates make, even without tools, or, as I might say, without 
hands, of the trunk of a great tree. This I not only thought 
possible, but easy, and pleased myself extremely with the thoughts 
of making it, and with my having much more convenience for it than 
any of the negroes or Indians; but not at all considering the 
particular inconveniences which I lay under more than the Indians 
did - viz. want of hands to move it, when it was made, into the 
water - a difficulty much harder for me to surmount than all the 
consequences of want of tools could be to them; for what was it to 
me, if when I had chosen a vast tree in the woods, and with much 
trouble cut it down, if I had been able with my tools to hew and 
dub the outside into the proper shape of a boat, and burn or cut 
out the inside to make it hollow, so as to make a boat of it - if,
after all this, I must leave it just there where I found it, and 
not be able to launch it into the water?

One would have thought I could not have had the least reflection 
upon my mind of my circumstances while I was making this boat, but 
I should have immediately thought how I should get it into the sea; 
but my thoughts were so intent upon my voyage over the sea in it,
that I never once considered how I should get it off the land: and 
it was really, in its own nature, more easy for me to guide it over 
forty-five miles of sea than about forty-five fathoms of land,
where it lay, to set it afloat in the water.

I went to work upon this boat the most like a fool that ever man 
did who had any of his senses awake. I pleased myself with the 
design, without determining whether I was ever able to undertake 
it; not but that the difficulty of launching my boat came often 
into my head; but I put a stop to my inquiries into it by this 
foolish answer which I gave myself - "Let me first make it; I 
warrant I will find some way or other to get it along when it is 
done."

This was a most preposterous method; but the eagerness of my fancy 
prevailed, and to work I went. I felled a cedar-tree, and I 
question much whether Solomon ever had such a one for the building 
of the Temple of Jerusalem; it was five feet ten inches diameter at 
the lower part next the stump, and four feet eleven inches diameter 
at the end of twenty-two feet; after which it lessened for a while,
and then parted into branches. It was not without infinite labour 
that I felled this tree; I was twenty days hacking and hewing at it 
at the bottom; I was fourteen more getting the branches and limbs 
and the vast spreading head cut off, which I hacked and hewed 
through with axe and hatchet, and inexpressible labour; after this,
it cost me a month to shape it and dub it to a proportion, and to 
something like the bottom of a boat, that it might swim upright as 
it ought to do. It cost me near three months more to clear the 
inside, and work it out so as to make an exact boat of it; this I 
did, indeed, without fire, by mere mallet and chisel, and by the 
dint of hard labour, till I had brought it to be a very handsome 
periagua, and big enough to have carried six-and-twenty men, and 
consequently big enough to have carried me and all my cargo.

When I had gone through this work I was extremely delighted with 
it. The boat was really much bigger than ever I saw a canoe or 
periagua, that was made of one tree, in my life. Many a weary 
stroke it had cost, you may be sure; and had I gotten it into the 
water, I make no question, but I should have begun the maddest 
voyage, and the most unlikely to be performed, that ever was 
undertaken.

But all my devices to get it into the water failed me; though they 
cost me infinite labour too. It lay about one hundred yards from 
the water, and not more; but the first inconvenience was, it was up 
hill towards the creek. Well, to take away this discouragement, I 
resolved to dig into the surface of the earth, and so make a 
declivity: this I began, and it cost me a prodigious deal of pains 
(but who grudge pains who have their deliverance in view?); but 
when this was worked through, and this difficulty managed, it was 
still much the same, for I could no more stir the canoe than I 
could the other boat. Then I measured the distance of ground, and 
resolved to cut a dock or canal, to bring the water up to the 
canoe, seeing I could not bring the canoe down to the water. Well,
I began this work; and when I began to enter upon it, and calculate 
how deep it was to be dug, how broad, how the stuff was to be 
thrown out, I found that, by the number of hands I had, being none 
but my own, it must have been ten or twelve years before I could 
have gone through with it; for the shore lay so high, that at the 
upper end it must have been at least twenty feet deep; so at 
length, though with great reluctancy, I gave this attempt over 
also.

This grieved me heartily; and now I saw, though too late, the folly 
of beginning a work before we count the cost, and before we judge 
rightly of our own strength to go through with it.
 
2022-07-04 1:12:08 AM  

NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.


In the article the company said it was to much work to move tools and supplies to a different location. Apparently getting permission to disassemble the bridge before they built it was also too much work.
 
2022-07-04 1:22:33 AM  

MrBallou: He can easily afford to dig a canal around the bridge.


That depends.  I've heard Dutch rudders can get pretty large.
 
2022-07-04 1:24:53 AM  
I get the anger.  That boat represents the lifetime take-home pay of 500 human beings, more than that in poorer countries, all for one rich man's toy.  It's a farking vile waste of resources, time, and labor.
 
2022-07-04 1:25:20 AM  

Rage Against the Thorazine: NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.

In the article the company said it was to much work to move tools and supplies to a different location. Apparently getting permission to disassemble the bridge before they built it was also too much work.


They had permission.
 
2022-07-04 1:25:32 AM  
I want to see a moviesque he brings in 20, 50, 100 helicopters to pick it up and movie it, plot twist it gets dropped

Or he spends a billion or so turning it into a shield like helicarrier

Or maybe make it a transform that can divide into multiple smaller ships, possibilities should be endless
 
2022-07-04 1:27:25 AM  

WillofJ2: I want to see a moviesque he brings in 20, 50, 100 helicopters to pick it up and movie it, plot twist it gets dropped

Or he spends a billion or so turning it into a shield like helicarrier

Or maybe make it a transform that can divide into multiple smaller ships, possibilities should be endless


I'm partial to a giant trebuchet.
 
2022-07-04 1:28:10 AM  

Mugato: The yacht, currently the second-largest in the world

SECOND? There's someone out there laughing at your manhood, Jeff! Your only recourse is a murder/suicide or you'll be flaccid for the rest of your life.


We are taking about the guy with a penis rocket, after all.
 
2022-07-04 1:30:22 AM  
Hang on, I left my microscopic violin around here somewhere.
 
2022-07-04 1:30:25 AM  
When Pizarro wanted to cross the isthmus of Panama, he simply burned his ships on the Caribbean beach, sifted through the ash to salvage the metal hardware then built new ships on the pacific beach. I don't see why they can't do that here.
 
2022-07-04 1:31:37 AM  
Nice boat.
 
2022-07-04 1:33:22 AM  

Rage Against the Thorazine: NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.

In the article the company said it was to much work to move tools and supplies to a different location. Apparently getting permission to disassemble the bridge before they built it was also too much work.


As was initiating the construction it in a place where it could actually access the ocean.
 
2022-07-04 1:34:08 AM  
Prime video resurrects myth busters and they come up with ideas to move the boats best idea wins no matter what the outcome

Partial to an archimedes claw device
 
2022-07-04 1:34:37 AM  

NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning.


The planning was fine. The former bridge was renovated in 2017 to allow the middle section to be easily removed and put back to allow tall ships to pass under. I call it a "former bridge" because in 1993 it was decommissioned and permanently locked in an "up" position that makes it unusable. Picture of the bridge to show what I mean:

Fark user imageView Full Size


I have no tears to shed for Jeff Bezos and I'm sure he'll be fine. The yacht workers, who knows.
 
2022-07-04 1:35:32 AM  

BafflerMeal: Rage Against the Thorazine: NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.

In the article the company said it was to much work to move tools and supplies to a different location. Apparently getting permission to disassemble the bridge before they built it was also too much work.

They had permission.


It says they asked. Typically you'd wait to get a legally binding answer first.
 
2022-07-04 1:35:37 AM  
They could christen it SS Molly Aida and have Werner Herzog do a reboot of Fitzcarraldo.
 
2022-07-04 1:36:18 AM  
The guy is extremely rich. He can just pay to have the top of the yacht removed so it can make it under the bridge and pay to have to put on again later. And he would not even notice the cost.
 
2022-07-04 1:37:07 AM  

NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.


Yeah, I don't get this at all. How do you build a boat that you can't get to its intended waterway?
 
2022-07-04 1:40:06 AM  
Just get this guy to pick it up over the bridge, and then set it down like a baby on the other side. 

i0.wp.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-04 1:42:52 AM  
What's the big deal? He asked, they said no. End of story. This is kind of a non story.
 
2022-07-04 1:44:14 AM  

MrBallou: Daniel Defoe covered this in Robinson Crusoe:

This at length put me upon thinking whether it was not possible to 
make myself a canoe, or periagua, such as the natives of those 
climates make, even without tools, or, as I might say, without 
hands, of the trunk of a great tree. This I not only thought 
possible, but easy, and pleased myself extremely with the thoughts 
of making it, and with my having much more convenience for it than 
any of the negroes or Indians; but not at all considering the 
particular inconveniences which I lay under more than the Indians 
did - viz. want of hands to move it, when it was made, into the 
water - a difficulty much harder for me to surmount than all the 
consequences of want of tools could be to them; for what was it to 
me, if when I had chosen a vast tree in the woods, and with much 
trouble cut it down, if I had been able with my tools to hew and 
dub the outside into the proper shape of a boat, and burn or cut 
out the inside to make it hollow, so as to make a boat of it - if,
after all this, I must leave it just there where I found it, and 
not be able to launch it into the water?

One would have thought I could not have had the least reflection 
upon my mind of my circumstances while I was making this boat, but 
I should have immediately thought how I should get it into the sea; 
but my thoughts were so intent upon my voyage over the sea in it,
that I never once considered how I should get it off the land: and 
it was really, in its own nature, more easy for me to guide it over 
forty-five miles of sea than about forty-five fathoms of land,
where it lay, to set it afloat in the water.

I went to work upon this boat the most like a fool that ever man 
did who had any of his senses awake. I pleased myself with the 
design, without determining whether I was ever able to undertake 
it; not but that the difficulty of launching my boat came often 
into my head; but I put a stop to my inquiries into it by this 
foolish answer which I gave myself - "Let me first make it; I 
warrant I will find some way or other to get it along when it is 
done."

This was a most preposterous method; but the eagerness of my fancy 
prevailed, and to work I went. I felled a cedar-tree, and I 
question much whether Solomon ever had such a one for the building 
of the Temple of Jerusalem; it was five feet ten inches diameter at 
the lower part next the stump, and four feet eleven inches diameter 
at the end of twenty-two feet; after which it lessened for a while,
and then parted into branches. It was not without infinite labour 
that I felled this tree; I was twenty days hacking and hewing at it 
at the bottom; I was fourteen more getting the branches and limbs 
and the vast spreading head cut off, which I hacked and hewed 
through with axe and hatchet, and inexpressible labour; after this,
it cost me a month to shape it and dub it to a proportion, and to 
something like the bottom of a boat, that it might swim upright as 
it ought to do. It cost me near three months more to clear the 
inside, and work it out so as to make an exact boat of it; this I 
did, indeed, without fire, by mere mallet and chisel, and by the 
dint of hard labour, till I had brought it to be a very handsome 
periagua, and big enough to have carried six-and-twenty men, and 
consequently big enough to have carried me and all my cargo.

When I had gone through this work I was extremely delighted with 
it. The boat was really much bigger than ever I saw a canoe or 
periagua, that was made of one tree, in my life. Many a weary 
stroke it had cost, you may be sure; and had I gotten it into the 
water, I make no question, but I should have begun the maddest 
voyage, and the most unlikely to be performed, that ever was 
undertaken.

But all my devices to get it into the water failed me; though they 
cost me infinite labour too. It lay about one hundred yards from 
the water, and not more; but the first inconvenience was, it was up 
hill towards the creek. Well, to take away this discouragement, I 
resolved to dig into the surface of the earth, and so make a 
declivity: this I began, and it cost me a prodigious deal of pains 
(but who grudge pains who have their deliverance in view?); but 
when this was worked through, and this difficulty managed, it was 
still much the same, for I could no more stir the canoe than I 
could the other boat. Then I measured the distance of ground, and 
resolved to cut a dock or canal, to bring the water up to the 
canoe, seeing I could not bring the canoe down to the water. Well,
I began this work; and when I began to enter upon it, and calculate 
how deep it was to be dug, how broad, how the stuff was to be 
thrown out, I found that, by the number of hands I had, being none 
but my own, it must have been ten or twelve years before I could 
have gone through with it; for the shore lay so high, that at the 
upper end it must have been at least twenty feet deep; so at 
length, though with great reluctancy, I gave this attempt over 
also.

This grieved me heartily; and now I saw, though too late, the folly 
of beginning a work before we count the cost, and before we judge 
rightly of our own strength to go through with it.


Tldr.
 
2022-07-04 1:45:49 AM  
just deflate the tires, then it will fit under the bridge
 
2022-07-04 1:47:28 AM  

jsmilky: just deflate the tires, then it will fit under the bridge


Convert it to a submarine.
 
2022-07-04 1:49:19 AM  

daffy: What's the big deal? He asked, they said no. End of story. This is kind of a non story.


The boat is already built..
 
2022-07-04 1:50:04 AM  
Lol. Lmao. Good job Bezos, fark you.
 
2022-07-04 1:58:36 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-04 2:09:32 AM  
There aren't enough womps to be womped for this womping. Also, he could just hire Werner Herzog to do it.

/ Fitzcabaldo.
 
2022-07-04 2:14:59 AM  

Rage Against the Thorazine: BafflerMeal: Rage Against the Thorazine: NeoCortex42: Seems like a lack of planning. Maybe next time, have the "giant yacht" construction site located closer to a port.

In the article the company said it was to much work to move tools and supplies to a different location. Apparently getting permission to disassemble the bridge before they built it was also too much work.

They had permission.

It says they asked. Typically you'd wait to get a legally binding answer first.


Jeff didn't get his legally binding answer shipped (ha ha) Prime?
 
2022-07-04 2:17:22 AM  

Herr Flick's Revenge: jsmilky: just deflate the tires, then it will fit under the bridge

Convert it to a submarine.


Call the Ukrainians. They know how to turn a surface ship into a submarine.
 
2022-07-04 2:20:13 AM  

Sleeper_agent: When Pizarro wanted to cross the isthmus of Panama, he simply burned his ships on the Caribbean beach, sifted through the ash to salvage the metal hardware then built new ships on the pacific beach. I don't see why they can't do that here.


What are you farking talking about?!?  NONE of that happened, it's incredible how wrong you are, it's as if you set out to tell a simple historical factoid and then got every single detail mistaken and out of order.

-Pizarro was a soldier on Balboa's expedition across the isthmus of Panama, not the commander.
-They did not burn their ships, they didn't need to, it was mostly a farking OVERLAND expedition.
-Cortez "burned" his ships, although he really didn't, he scuttled them so that they were out of reach of mutineers but could be salvaged later.

Even if you'd gotten one farking fact right, which you didn't, it would still leave the impossibility of taking all the metal fittings out of a burning ship-pyre and then assembling them after an overland journey-- Those ships took years to build, with dedicated facilities and hundreds of craftsmen, a hundred or so soldiers and some native bearers would have zero chance of rebuilding even a simple vessel in pre-colonial central America.

Thanks for writing the dumbest thing I may ever read online.
 
2022-07-04 2:23:44 AM  

Mugato: The yacht, currently the second-largest in the world

SECOND? There's someone out there laughing at your manhood, Jeff! Your only recourse is a murder/suicide or you'll be flaccid for the rest of your life.


Jeff owns the biggest one too.  This is his Summer yacht.
 
2022-07-04 2:30:36 AM  
He needs to pay off the people of Rotterdam if he wants his daft little ship to be free.

How about he feed and house the homeless of Rotterdam for the next 50 years? A few thousand scholarships? A new world-leading hospital?

It'll probably cost less than the galley countertop on his daft toy.
 
2022-07-04 2:36:51 AM  
I'm going to offer Jeff a little something to get his new boat lower than the bridge...

media.istockphoto.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-04 2:41:02 AM  
Why... in the hell... would you build a yacht... too big to reach the sea?!
 
2022-07-04 2:45:13 AM  
Isn't the problem that it will fit without the masts and if it isn't on a barge?
 
2022-07-04 2:59:37 AM  
See, if you had done this in 2016 and offered to pay for restoration and maintenance, you'd be a hero. But now you're asking them to do something inherently risky for your convenience.
 
2022-07-04 3:19:16 AM  

seelorq: Hubris.


They actually, genuinely, think that we don't count.
 
2022-07-04 3:22:38 AM  
Jeff and two of his billionaire buddies are in Tanzania this week, so maybe he'll just shoot some endangered wildlife about it.
 
2022-07-04 4:22:54 AM  
He can still sail around in circles within its confines, I guess.
 
2022-07-04 4:46:45 AM  
Why not simply offer to pay for both the Bridges temporary deconstruction then recon obstruction and just before it sails out offer the locals who are mad a free party on it so they can also enjoy it with a lottery to bring a lucky winner on once a year for free to enjoy it to? Also throw in a historic museum to be built to the historic bridge?
 
2022-07-04 5:00:44 AM  

FormlessOne: Why... in the hell... would you build a yacht... too big to reach the sea?!


Bezos didn't.  Hate him all you want, but not for this...he paid the construction company a fair price, which included a service they'd provided before...bridge removal and replacement.   Which the town agreed to, as they had for prior large vessels the firm had built for others...company has been there for decades iirc, and the town likes having the jobs it provides.

If they don't solve the problem, I suspect the breach of contract damages will bankrupt the company, and possibly the town, depending on Euro municipal liability.

Ie, this isn't Bezos' problem. (Unless his attorneys were morons, in which case they're in for a ginormous malpractice suit from his other attorneys)

/how about hating him for how his employees are treated?
 
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