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(CNN)   Did you have "Giant African land snails put county under quarantine" on your 2022 Florida disaster bingo card? If you did, um... congratulations?   (cnn.com) divider line
    More: Followup, Florida, Snail, Freshwater snail, giant African land snail, related items, Land snail, Slug, effect June  
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2012 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Jul 2022 at 11:14 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



49 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-07-03 9:34:04 AM  
The snails can't read the quarantine.  They'll violate it.  Slowly.
 
2022-07-03 11:20:49 AM  
The state that brought us De Santis also brings us invasive snails.  Coincidence or karma?
 
2022-07-03 11:22:10 AM  
The snails pose a health risk to humans because they carry a parasite called rat lungworm, which can cause meningitis, Christina Chitty, a public information director at FDACS, told CNN.

When asked how the department planned to remove the snails, the steely-eyed Chitty replied simply "bang bang."
 
2022-07-03 11:22:59 AM  
Luckily Florida has lots of freedom and redhats. That should keep the snails away.
 
2022-07-03 11:25:18 AM  
They are slowly taking over the world. Everybody pani...oh forget about it, by the time we get to a good panic they will probably all be rounded up. After all, they are snails.
 
2022-07-03 11:25:26 AM  
break out the white wine and butter
 
2022-07-03 11:26:28 AM  

petec: break out the white wine and butter


No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!
 
2022-07-03 11:31:21 AM  

killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!


"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "


rei.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-03 11:32:05 AM  
Snail hunt!
 
2022-07-03 11:32:07 AM  
"If the owners discard them into the wild or accidentally lose them, they can quickly establish a foothold..."

How does one "accidentally lose" a snail?  I guess an inadequate terrarium that they very slowly escape from?  Are snail owners taking their snails out to the yard to "play" or something and then forgetting about them long enough for it to hide?
 
2022-07-03 11:34:20 AM  

petec: killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!

"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "



c.tenor.comView Full Size
 
2022-07-03 11:38:58 AM  
You need at least sixteen snails to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a snail farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single snail can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a snail".

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-03 11:39:08 AM  

petec: killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!

"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "


[rei.com image 400x400]


Oh look, it's the generation raised on Sponge Bob.
 
2022-07-03 11:39:41 AM  
If you thought bats were the prime incubators of viruses and parasitical diseases just wait until you get a load of these guys

petec: though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), [woman with pet snail]

Daaaaw that's almost cute ... her life expectancy is now numbered in months
 
2022-07-03 11:40:37 AM  
Good thing the FDACS budget wasn't cut in half in 2021 and reallocated it to funding new stadium construction.

Wait, what timeline am I in again?
 
2022-07-03 11:40:45 AM  
I thought Floridians would've reason enough for a quarantine.
 
2022-07-03 11:41:02 AM  

New Rising Sun: "If the owners discard them into the wild or accidentally lose them, they can quickly establish a foothold..."

How does one "accidentally lose" a snail?  I guess an inadequate terrarium that they very slowly escape from?  Are snail owners taking their snails out to the yard to "play" or something and then forgetting about them long enough for it to hide?


This is Florida we're talking about. And not even the nice part. Owners are one meth binge away from losing anything not attached to them.
 
2022-07-03 11:41:42 AM  

New Rising Sun: "If the owners discard them into the wild or accidentally lose them, they can quickly establish a foothold..."

How does one "accidentally lose" a snail?  I guess an inadequate terrarium that they very slowly escape from?  Are snail owners taking their snails out to the yard to "play" or something and then forgetting about them long enough for it to hide?


Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-03 11:42:21 AM  
Stephen Hillenburg has doomed us all.
 
2022-07-03 11:44:33 AM  

Devolving_Spud: The snails can't read the quarantine.  They'll violate it.  Slowly.


Even if they could, I was told that quarantines were tyranny.  Snails, rise up and become ungovernable!
 
2022-07-03 11:45:06 AM  
Thanks, illegal exotic pet owners.
 
2022-07-03 11:47:02 AM  

petec: killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!

"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "


[rei.com image 400x400]


Nope.
 
2022-07-03 11:48:53 AM  

Jairzinho: petec: killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!

"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "


[rei.com image 400x400]

Nope.


They say if you put that she'll up to your eat you can hear your brain getting infected.
 
2022-07-03 11:49:37 AM  
*puts down shell*
 
2022-07-03 11:52:34 AM  
That is one big damned snail.
Also- can't CNN exist without clickbait bullshiat ads???
 
2022-07-03 11:52:47 AM  

tricycleracer: Thanks, illegal exotic pet owners.


Pretty sure the giant snails will be all eaten by the snakeheads who will then die from lungworm (assuming they aren't taken out by the gorillas before winter comes).
 
2022-07-03 11:53:36 AM  
Escargot to go, please.
 
2022-07-03 11:54:34 AM  
(RsTFA)

Holy shiat, those look more like 'murican trailer park snails.
 
2022-07-03 11:58:49 AM  
I just hope they don't team up with the turtles.  They would be UNSTOPPABLE!
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-07-03 12:05:25 PM  

petec: killershark: petec: break out the white wine and butter

No! Don't do that. Eating it can give you meningitis. Wrong snails!

"Basically, any land snail is edible. Although I don't know any land snails that are poisonous, saltwater snails, slugs and mollusks are a different subject. You don't have to go to France to eat snails, you can eat the typical brown garden snail in your backyard. But as always, do some research.
In France, there are only two specific species eaten as escargot. In England, all species are considered edible. And the giant African snail can not only be found in Africa (Nigria), but in Florida (an invasive species), though the giant African snail (sometimes kept as a pet), is big enough to need gutting. "


[rei.com image 400x400]


"Please... my rabbit... he is very sick."
 
2022-07-03 12:09:04 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Alright that's enough Florida for today.
 
2022-07-03 12:25:27 PM  

Spartapuss: They say if you put that she'll up to your eat you can hear your brain getting infected.


Either you talk from experience or your autocorrect just gave me a stroke.
 
2022-07-03 12:41:08 PM  
Put out a dish of beer. They love it.

Of course, they die, but you can get a lot of them to go to snail heaven rather quickly.

/ Putting salt on them is pretty cool too
 
2022-07-03 12:45:32 PM  

Miss_Dorothy_Kilgallen: I just hope they don't team up with the turtles.  They would be UNSTOPPABLE!

I can somehow envision this to be a biologically compatible symbiotic relationship...not exactly Master-Blaster but yeah, Now we just need to affix a nautilus on the side and we're 3/5 of the way to a shelled Voltron
 
2022-07-03 1:12:42 PM  

tricycleracer: Thanks, illegal exotic pet owners.


Goddamnit so much, right?

/but it's hella smart and it knows it's name, "here Snot, here Snot, thassa good boy, slime over to mommy".
 
2022-07-03 1:17:30 PM  
I did!
what do I win??
 
2022-07-03 1:24:09 PM  

New Rising Sun: "If the owners discard them into the wild or accidentally lose them, they can quickly establish a foothold..."

How does one "accidentally lose" a snail?  I guess an inadequate terrarium that they very slowly escape from?  Are snail owners taking their snails out to the yard to "play" or something and then forgetting about them long enough for it to hide?


I laughed so hard I nearly choked. Well done!
 
2022-07-03 2:22:40 PM  
I would have assumed Toads, but whatever.
 
2022-07-03 2:28:40 PM  

Iamos: The snails pose a health risk to humans because they carry a parasite called rat lungworm, which can cause meningitis, Christina Chitty, a public information director at FDACS, told CNN.

When asked how the department planned to remove the snails, the steely-eyed Chitty replied simply "bang bang."


imagizer.imageshack.com
 
2022-07-03 2:41:01 PM  
What year is it? The last time I went canoeing at a state park you could see dozens of piles of the shells. We've known about them for at least a decade.

*Re-reads article*

Oh, they're moving north. Those guys are farked.
 
2022-07-03 2:46:55 PM  
I submitted this link days ago with a better headline...
 
2022-07-03 3:05:13 PM  
teach the giant pythons to eat them
 
2022-07-03 3:25:02 PM  
Before I clicked on TFA, I guessed it was either Pinellas or Pasco.
 
2022-07-03 4:03:31 PM  

New Rising Sun: "If the owners discard them into the wild or accidentally lose them, they can quickly establish a foothold..."

How does one "accidentally lose" a snail?  I guess an inadequate terrarium that they very slowly escape from?  Are snail owners taking their snails out to the yard to "play" or something and then forgetting about them long enough for it to hide?


You laugh, but this happens with box turtles and tortoises. People stick em in the yard, forget that motivated turtles actually are FAST. They go back in 5 minutes to check and Shelly has made a clean break for it and VANISHED.

Now, I don't think SNAILS have a particularly "fast" setting outside the universe of The Neverending Story, but these are FLORIDIAN pet owners we're talking about here.

And I should know, i live here.....
 
2022-07-03 6:16:36 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Why is that bunny slimy?
 
2022-07-03 7:43:33 PM  
It is so adorable, just look at those eye stalks!
 
2022-07-03 7:55:32 PM  
They are not native, but import some French to take care of the problem.
 
2022-07-03 8:01:04 PM  
Jimmy Buffett needs to find that lost shaker of salt.
 
2022-07-03 8:52:17 PM  
Those things are huge. How many Rhode Islands are they?
 
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