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(WPXI.com)   Drunk woman charged with impersonation of cat   (wpxi.com) divider line
    More: Stupid, WPXI, Early Sunday morning, Woman, Tenesha Fisher, Leo White, intoxicated Kelly Bridger, Jess Robbins, Sleep  
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2934 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jun 2022 at 5:30 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



37 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-06-30 3:29:43 AM  
Bonus points if she had puked on the couch.
 
2022-06-30 5:33:19 AM  
JFC, lady, this is my first sighting of a black Karen.  She didn't lock her door.  Drunk lady passes out in her grandmother's old apartment.

It's should be a clear case of live and let be and maybe remember to lock your door.  Instead Black Karen puts a baseball bat by each door, clutches her pearls on the local news, and presses charges.
 
2022-06-30 5:35:30 AM  
I impersonated a cat once, while attending a lavish banquet. I crawled around on the floor. When I was introduced to someone who was Very Important in Local Politics I meowed.

I think the main reason that I got away with it was that I was two years old at the time. It might not be so well received were I to try it again.
 
2022-06-30 5:40:04 AM  
"Fisher believes her front door wasn't closed, probably giving Bridger the opportunity to walk inside."

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-30 5:49:01 AM  
She left butthole prints in lipstick all over the kitchen counter and tables?
 
2022-06-30 6:11:43 AM  
Three bears inconsolable
 
2022-06-30 6:19:47 AM  
Did she walk around and knock things off shelves and tables like an asshole?
 
2022-06-30 6:23:06 AM  
"She could have come in violent, she could have come in swinging. She could have come in with a knife."

She could have handed you a million dollars. She could have re-grouted your bathroom. She could have given you an erotica massage.
 
2022-06-30 6:23:23 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-30 6:27:42 AM  
Here's the thing:

You can start out a night with good intentions. You're out there patrolling your territory, slap-fighting other cats, killing rodents, running off bears. Maybe it's a "hot" night, if you know what I mean, and the barbs from Cupid's arrows are there for the yowling, every alley, every fencepost gleaming with fertile eyes all for you until you need to sleep off the night in your veins.

Are you telling me you wouldn't nip back into the house where you used to be a kitten, just to sleep a few hours? Of course you would.

Okay, it's not like that anymore since I got my ear tipped. But still, after a night of hunting I got that one rat who gorged himself on a bag of fermented fruit. Delicious, but damn, did I want my mother for a few hours.

I forget what my point was.
 
2022-06-30 6:41:04 AM  
I loved a particular scene in The Young Ones where Mike the cool guy is asked if he was a cat burglar and he replied "Yeah, I've got a Swiss bank account with two thousand cats in it!"
 
2022-06-30 6:47:21 AM  
I dunno I kinda feel like pressing charges is a bit petty.  A night in the drunk tank should be sufficient.
 
2022-06-30 7:05:45 AM  

Do you know the way to Mordor: I loved a particular scene in The Young Ones where Mike the cool guy is asked if he was a cat burglar and he replied "Yeah, I've got a Swiss bank account with two thousand cats in it!"


And I don't mean the hep kind!
 
2022-06-30 7:19:45 AM  
🎶say baby do wanna lay down with me, say baby do you wanna lay down by my side🎶

Fark user imageView Full Size

SAY BABY!
 
2022-06-30 7:43:08 AM  
CSB: I used to live in one of those apartment complexes that every 4 unit building looked exactly the same. My apartment was a party and crash pad for several young Sailors. I woke up from my couch one morning and went to make coffee and there was some dude passed out in the kitchen, no vomit or anything, just sitting at the table snoring peacefully. My roommates started stirring and we were all getting dressed for work then one of them said: Who's friend is this? He's got to go, we're getting ready to roll out. We all did the: I thought you knew him.... routine and finally woke the guy up and figured out he lived in the next building over and got confused when dropped off the night before and stumbled into the wrong apartment.
/CSB
//didn't call police
///laughed with the guy about whenever we saw him
 
2022-06-30 7:53:11 AM  

LordBeavis: JFC, lady, this is my first sighting of a black Karen.  She didn't lock her door.  Drunk lady passes out in her grandmother's old apartment.

It's should be a clear case of live and let be and maybe remember to lock your door.  Instead Black Karen puts a baseball bat by each door, clutches her pearls on the local news, and presses charges.


Black Karen...?

Blaren?
 
2022-06-30 7:55:32 AM  

grokca: [Fark user image image 526x935]


Fark user imageView Full Size

Raccoons 🦝 have laser eyes
 
2022-06-30 7:58:05 AM  
Lady: Your honor, I am a cat
 
2022-06-30 8:06:06 AM  
"Now, this doesn't happen to me very often, but about three weeks ago, I met a girl and she was real nice and she invited me to her apartment. So I went over there, and she had the best pussy I have ever seen -" [Audience laughter, cheers and catcalls] "Oh, now come on! I'm talkin' about her cat! Now that makes me sick, right there! No! No, you can't say anything anymore that people don't take it dirty, and I'm sorry, that disgusts me!" [Pause] "That cat was the best fark I ever had, too."
/Steve Martin
 
2022-06-30 8:16:27 AM  

BeerBear: Lady: Your honor, I am a cat


Fark user imageView Full Size

Her lawyer
 
2022-06-30 8:36:15 AM  
Good thing she's got a bat by the door now. That's going to be convenient for the next person that breaks in.
 
2022-06-30 8:58:38 AM  
The Guy Acting Like a Cat
Youtube v9CX0SfGjY0
 
2022-06-30 9:01:15 AM  
"Coraopolis police identified the woman as an intoxicated Kelly Bridger."

What's her Fark handle?
 
2022-06-30 9:29:25 AM  

The_Sponge: Bonus points if she had puked on the couch.


Wouldn't you?
 
2022-06-30 9:33:56 AM  

LordBeavis: JFC, lady, this is my first sighting of a black Karen.  She didn't lock her door.  Drunk lady passes out in her grandmother's old apartment.

It's should be a clear case of live and let be and maybe remember to lock your door.  Instead Black Karen puts a baseball bat by each door, clutches her pearls on the local news, and presses charges.


Itt, Lord Karen tells Black Karen how to live
 
2022-06-30 9:43:44 AM  

Rattrap007: Did she walk around and knock things off shelves and tables like an asshole?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-30 9:50:49 AM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: grokca: [Fark user image image 526x935]

[Fark user image image 425x566]
Raccoons 🦝 have laser eyes


Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-30 9:54:03 AM  
 
2022-06-30 10:29:21 AM  
Feline Identity Theft (FIT) is a problem for the unfit
 
2022-06-30 11:38:12 AM  
Vansthing: My apartment was a party and crash pad for several young Sailors.

Fark user imageView Full Size

"I shan't share my confidences with you if you're going to mock me."
 
2022-06-30 11:54:09 AM  
To those who feel the homeowner is making too big a deal of this, all I'm gonna say is that this drunk white woman is not going to break into your home and sleep with you.
 
2022-06-30 12:21:02 PM  

Feral Cat With Scissors: Here's the thing:

You can start out a night with good intentions. You're out there patrolling your territory, slap-fighting other cats, killing rodents, running off bears. Maybe it's a "hot" night, if you know what I mean, and the barbs from Cupid's arrows are there for the yowling, every alley, every fencepost gleaming with fertile eyes all for you until you need to sleep off the night in your veins.

Are you telling me you wouldn't nip back into the house where you used to be a kitten, just to sleep a few hours? Of course you would.

Okay, it's not like that anymore since I got my ear tipped. But still, after a night of hunting I got that one rat who gorged himself on a bag of fermented fruit. Delicious, but damn, did I want my mother for a few hours.

I forget what my point was.


Username checks out
 
2022-06-30 1:05:55 PM  
scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.netView Full Size
 
2022-06-30 3:47:56 PM  

Katwang: 🎶say baby do wanna lay down with me, say baby do you wanna lay down by my side🎶

[Fark user image image 425x330]
SAY BABY!


Oh, Tommy
 
2022-06-30 8:11:59 PM  

big pig peaches: LordBeavis: JFC, lady, this is my first sighting of a black Karen.  She didn't lock her door.  Drunk lady passes out in her grandmother's old apartment.

It's should be a clear case of live and let be and maybe remember to lock your door.  Instead Black Karen puts a baseball bat by each door, clutches her pearls on the local news, and presses charges.

Black Karen...?

Blaren?


SeaLab 2021 Stormy's Casual Racism
Youtube m_hBxdD7-OI
 
2022-07-01 12:21:36 AM  
I'm just imagining if it were a black man in a white family's house. How freaked out everyone, including the police would have been. But it's not and the family is just "hmm". "I know right?"
I'm laughing my ass off thinking about it.
 
2022-07-01 4:50:59 AM  

chitownmike: LordBeavis: JFC, lady, this is my first sighting of a black Karen.  She didn't lock her door.  Drunk lady passes out in her grandmother's old apartment.

It's should be a clear case of live and let be and maybe remember to lock your door.  Instead Black Karen puts a baseball bat by each door, clutches her pearls on the local news, and presses charges.

Itt, Lord Karen tells Black Karen how to live


That's LORD Karen to y...wait a minute.  Nevermind.
 
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