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(KIRO-7 Seattle)   Man attempts to shoplift eleven cases of beer from Safeway. He would have gotten away with it too, if his getaway driver wasn't the city bus   (kiro7.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Security, security guard, Security guard, Police, report of a man, News Staff June, Surveillance, KIRO-TV  
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1780 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jun 2022 at 8:30 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



25 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-06-29 8:35:20 AM  
29 more and that would have been the same as four tens.

And that's terrible.
 
2022-06-29 8:37:02 AM  
They kept ringin' the bell!!!
 
2022-06-29 8:38:06 AM  
Was it at least good beer?
 
2022-06-29 8:40:25 AM  
11 cases of beer?  He got greedy. If he went with just 1 or 2 cases of beer, he likely would have gotten away with it.
 
2022-06-29 8:45:51 AM  
What's the point of security guard if they'll just stand aside and let someone walk out of the store with stolen goods?
 
2022-06-29 8:49:02 AM  

Russ1642: What's the point of security guard if they'll just stand aside and let someone walk out of the store with stolen goods?


The best I can figure is the security guard is there to watch for suspicious activity and call the police, so they should not be called "security guards", they should be called "professional witnesses".
 
2022-06-29 8:50:48 AM  

DRTFA: Russ1642: What's the point of security guard if they'll just stand aside and let someone walk out of the store with stolen goods?

The best I can figure is the security guard is there to watch for suspicious activity and call the police, so they should not be called "security guards", they should be called "professional witnesses".


At least the security guard elevated the crime from shoplifting to armed robbery. Maybe that's his job.
 
2022-06-29 8:51:21 AM  
That's why you don't shoplift something low ABV, like beer. You shoplift liquor, which is much more efficient.
 
2022-06-29 8:53:35 AM  
I can't fully evaluate this story without knowing the brand(s) of beer involved.
 
2022-06-29 8:54:29 AM  
Sounds like that "security guard" should be fired.
 
2022-06-29 8:54:56 AM  
I'm guessing he stole 70 cases and the 29 case number is the cop math end result.
 
2022-06-29 8:58:15 AM  
Was the plan to put the shopping cart on the bus too?
 
2022-06-29 9:00:15 AM  
i0.wp.comView Full Size
 
2022-06-29 9:02:59 AM  
I've carried two cases of beer on the bus before and it's a pain in the ass. I'm not sure the protocol for 11.
 
2022-06-29 9:13:52 AM  

Russ1642: What's the point of security guard if they'll just stand aside and let someone walk out of the store with stolen goods?


In 2022 security guards provide comfort to paying shoppers by giving a false sense of security.
 
2022-06-29 9:15:25 AM  
There are better ways to avoid a DUI.
 
2022-06-29 9:17:58 AM  

bighairyguy: I can't fully evaluate this story without knowing the brand(s) of beer involved.


It was a brand the grocery store keeps 11 cases if on-hand and on display.  At the grocery stores near me (which cater to middle and upper middle class folks in Houston)that means beer for men who beat their wives.  Anything good does not have that much stock on display, if at all, especially if they are 24s.
 
2022-06-29 9:18:03 AM  

iamskibibitz: Sounds like that "security guard" should be fired.


The guard could see the brand of beer. Why risk injury?
 
2022-06-29 9:49:38 AM  

iamskibibitz: Sounds like that "security guard" should be fired.


a lot of stores have non-engagement policies so they don't get sued if the guard works the thief over (innocent until proven otherwise, huge liability for a battery charge)) and so that it reduces the risk of the guard getting injured by a thief (stabbed, shot, pepper sprayed, beat up)

their presence is generally a nominally effective deterrent - most thieves won't bother
 
2022-06-29 10:47:54 AM  

Confabulat: I've carried two cases of beer on the bus before and it's a pain in the ass. I'm not sure the protocol for 11.


Anyone who would steal 11 cases of beer is already entitled. He'd hold up the entire bus while making 11 individual trips to load them all.
 
2022-06-29 10:53:48 AM  

Confabulat: I've carried two cases of beer on the bus before and it's a pain in the ass. I'm not sure the protocol for 11.


I'm pretty sure the protocol is the same, in that you tell the driver to mind his own f'ing business. But, 11 cases is 200 lbs of beer. That's a logistical nightmare to get on a bus. He must have stolen a dolly with it, but even if the driver kneels the bus, HTF do you get that up the steps?
 
2022-06-29 11:18:04 AM  
A security guard confronted the man, but the man told the guard if he didn't get by, the guard would be pepper-sprayed.
The security guard backed off and the man left the store without paying for the beer.


Yeah uh, it's pepper spray.  You took this job because you're a tough guy.

You shouldn't have this job anymore.
 
2022-06-29 12:36:02 PM  
Always steal 23 cans of beer at a time. That way, they'll never have a case against you.
 
2022-06-29 12:39:53 PM  

functionisalwaystaken: bighairyguy: I can't fully evaluate this story without knowing the brand(s) of beer involved.

It was a brand the grocery store keeps 11 cases if on-hand and on display.  At the grocery stores near me (which cater to middle and upper middle class folks in Houston)that means beer for men who beat their wives.  Anything good does not have that much stock on display, if at all, especially if they are 24s.


Holee Jeezus, I think I've just witnessed peak beer snobbery.  😀
 
2022-06-30 2:53:07 AM  

OkieDookie: Was it at least good beer?


No. It was warm Rainier from the Safeway on 15th and Market according to my lies.
 
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