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(Twitter)   "Oh, I'm the official sniper for the Dallas cowboys"   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Scary, shot  
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1265 clicks; posted to Sports » on 25 Jun 2022 at 9:53 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-06-25 4:35:01 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-06-25 5:46:40 PM  
"There's Homer!! There's Homer!!!"
 
2022-06-25 5:58:16 PM  
I've heard of the shotgun formation, but this is ridiculous.
 
2022-06-25 5:59:25 PM  
I don't see any way that this could go wrong
 
2022-06-25 6:04:24 PM  
Not taking any chances the Seahawks will win, huh
 
2022-06-25 6:07:27 PM  
I believe they started that after 9/11
 
2022-06-25 6:17:07 PM  
Picked off!
 
2022-06-25 6:26:55 PM  

Thoreny: I believe they started that after 9/11


Yup. This is old news going reviral. Jerry Jones was bragging about this over a decade ago at the 1st Super Bowl in his new stadium.
 
2022-06-25 7:58:21 PM  
He's waiting to recreate that scene from The Last Boy Scout with Tom Brady?
 
2022-06-25 7:59:56 PM  
i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2022-06-25 8:55:35 PM  
Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?
 
2022-06-25 10:01:24 PM  
I'm surprised Jerry hasn't slipped one of them a suitcase to shoot an opposing player yet. Or one of his own, for that matter.
 
2022-06-25 10:01:43 PM  

WTFdoesitmatter: I'm surprised Jerry hasn't slipped one of them a suitcase to shoot an opposing player yet. Or one of his own, for that matter.


*suitcase of cash
 
2022-06-25 10:04:19 PM  
Snipers in Texas....

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-25 10:07:59 PM  
If they Cowboys have a snipers, why can't the receivers catch anything?
 
2022-06-25 10:16:25 PM  
'Murica.
 
2022-06-25 10:26:12 PM  

fnordfocus: Not taking any chances the Seahawks will win, huh


Guy's gonna shoot the QB, jump out of the booth and yell sic semper tyrannis!
 
2022-06-25 10:40:35 PM  

Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?


Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.
 
2022-06-25 10:40:56 PM  

OkieDookie: If they Cowboys have a snipers, why can't the receivers catch anything?


The sniper will shoot the wrong person then blame the refs too.
 
2022-06-25 10:45:05 PM  

dstanley: Picked off!


Romoceptions were far less deadly, though.
 
2022-06-25 11:29:10 PM  

Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.


Especially at this range.
----------

This isn't all that surprising, if you look at open air stadiums you'll see them on the roofs as well, I've seen these guys at Bills games (at least their lookouts). It's been pretty standard since 9/11, and not for nothing, is a terrorism counter-measure, not anything else. So anyone worried about someone else getting shot (like a carry-through) they aren't worried about that; they are worried about the threat.
 
2022-06-25 11:40:18 PM  

Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.


And yet somehow, I am 100% confident modern police would fark this up, too.
 
2022-06-25 11:43:08 PM  
I assume this is a uniquely American thing, having snipers at sporting events. Maybe Somalia too, perhaps.
 
2022-06-25 11:48:38 PM  

Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.


I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.
 
2022-06-25 11:51:09 PM  

koder: And yet somehow, I am 100% confident modern police would fark this up, too.


Well, take some solace in knowing they aren't cops, they are DHS and current/former military.

king of vegas: I assume this is a uniquely American thing, having snipers at sporting events. Maybe Somalia too, perhaps.


Oh yeah? Think so?
https://sports.ndtv.com/euro-2020/snipers-were-ready-to-shoot-parachutist-at-euro-2020-match-minister-2465542
https://www.thesun.co.uk/sport/football/9240182/snipers-roof-england-holland-nations-league/
https://www.dailystar.co.uk/sport/football/sniper-champions-league-city-chelsea-24213040
 
2022-06-25 11:51:22 PM  
Philly has M-60 emplacements.
 
2022-06-26 12:05:54 AM  

Flappyhead: Philly has M-60 emplacements.


The machine gun, or the Vietnam era tanks?
 
2022-06-26 12:17:57 AM  

Artist: Snipers in Texas....

[Fark user image image 350x218]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-26 12:55:03 AM  

Mr. Eugenides: Flappyhead: Philly has M-60 emplacements.

The machine gun, or the Vietnam era tanks?


They also hame M-72 D-Cell launchers.
 
2022-06-26 1:14:30 AM  
As part of the NFL's commitment to reducing head injuries, snipers are encouraged to aim for center mass.
 
2022-06-26 1:28:59 AM  

Olympic Trolling Judge: As part of the NFL's commitment to reducing head injuries, snipers are encouraged to aim for center mass.


Except when they get excited and aim for hands, knees, ankles, and scrotums
 
2022-06-26 1:48:57 AM  

Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.


This, this, very this.

That's the reason for the second half of rule 4 -- Always be certain of your target and your backstop.
 
2022-06-26 2:06:13 AM  

Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.


With stadium seating combined with that high of an angle, the person behind the target would probably only be hit in the ankle if they are unlucky. Not great, but also better than being turned to mush or riddled with bullet holes.
 
2022-06-26 2:09:39 AM  

Bootysama: Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.

With stadium seating combined with that high of an angle, the person behind the target would probably only be hit in the ankle if they are unlucky. Not great, but also better than being turned to mush or riddled with bullet holes.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-26 3:34:15 AM  
Pretty sure stadium sniper was the first job Mr Rodgers had.
 
2022-06-26 3:38:36 AM  

phimuskapsi: koder: And yet somehow, I am 100% confident modern police would fark this up, too.

Well, take some solace in knowing they aren't cops, they are DHS and current/former military.

king of vegas: I assume this is a uniquely American thing, having snipers at sporting events. Maybe Somalia too, perhaps.

Oh yeah? Think so?
https://sports.ndtv.com/euro-2020/snipers-were-ready-to-shoot-parachutist-at-euro-2020-match-minister-2465542
https://www.thesun.co.uk/sport/football/9240182/snipers-roof-england-holland-nations-league/
https://www.dailystar.co.uk/sport/football/sniper-champions-league-city-chelsea-24213040


Longdon had straight up anti air batteries on the rooftops for the olympics
 
2022-06-26 3:49:06 AM  

Bootysama: Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.

With stadium seating combined with that high of an angle, the person behind the target would probably only be hit in the ankle if they are unlucky. Not great, but also better than being turned to mush or riddled with bullet holes.


That ain't Pappy's 30.06.  With human targets basically sitting right on a concrete backstop they are prob shooting subsonic suppressed fragmenting rounds.

Those don't whistle through a guy and ricochet.
 
2022-06-26 5:04:15 AM  
It's a long kick, it seems long enough, and it's ...  it's ... it's ... No Good. The wind must have caught it right there at the end.
 
2022-06-26 5:37:36 AM  
They should have snipers for schools and grocery stores.
 
2022-06-26 7:17:44 AM  

King Something: Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.

This, this, very this.

That's the reason for the second half of rule 4 -- Always be certain of your target and your backstop.


Just put Gary Sanchez behind the person - he'll miss it every time.
 
2022-06-26 8:02:21 AM  
Damn Fark. There is a whole internet ful of these and they are hilarious.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-26 9:31:41 AM  
These were put in there for Super Bowls and such; I remember that exact picture from what, 2011? I doubt they're putting in snipers for every home game.

/attacking a SB would've been a way bigger deal than even 9/11
 
mjg
2022-06-26 9:40:06 AM  
"Might need a rifle here. Remember how much we got egged last year?"
/Guffman

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-26 11:22:02 AM  

Lsherm: Representative of the unwashed masses: Lsherm: Based on that picture, what are the odds a sniper could hit anyone in the stands without hurting someone else?

I mean, I guess if someone runs out, alone, into the middle of the field with a bomb they could take them out, but otherwise, what is the point?

Fun fact, snipers tend to be very VERY accurate.

I'm not knocking the sniper, but if you hit a person in the chest in the stands, even with a .22 LR, it's going right through that person and into someone behind them. Anything higher caliber you're just asking for more damage.

Bullets don't stop when they hit a person.


Chest?

It's going to be a Boom Headshot.

But the bullet will pass through, and it will end a half-century conspiracy theory.
 
2022-06-26 11:22:35 AM  

Mr. Eugenides: Flappyhead: Philly has M-60 emplacements.

The machine gun, or the Vietnam era tanks?


Gritty.
 
2022-06-26 11:47:50 AM  
Guys, the official name is The Sniper Nest. Next person I hear it calling it the book depository is going to talk to HR.
 
2022-06-26 1:08:21 PM  

abhorrent1: OkieDookie: If they Cowboys have a snipers, why can't the receivers catch anything?

The sniper will shoot the wrong person then blame the refs too.


Whoa! And Alicia Thomas of Austin intercepts the projectile at the Cowboy's 35 yard line, row G, section C109!
 
2022-06-26 1:29:46 PM  
that is the third most useless thing in the deathstar after Jerry and the Cowboys.

The only person who could get away with sniping at a football game,no matter how dire the situation is a cop.

We have already seen at Uvalde that a Texas lawman wont raise a finger or a gun in a dire situation
 
2022-06-26 2:00:35 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-26 2:06:40 PM  
First off, nobody is going to point out that the photo isn't of the Dallas Cowboys stadium and is, in fact, about a decade old? That picture was taken at Lucas Oil Stadium during the Super Bowl week.

Secondly, yes, there are snipers at most major sporting events like the Super Bowl, World Series, and a lot of other events that are deemed high-treat for terrorist activity. This should surprise absolutely nobody.
 
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