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(Showbiz 411)   Some original actors? Do I want to see dinosaurs stomp the shaite out of everything, a tale that started when I was a kid? Well Grandpappy told me the legend of Godzilla, and his even his Pappy talked of this King Kong myth   (showbiz411.com) divider line
    More: Cool, Jurassic Park, Jurassic World, American film actors, Laura Dern, Jar Jar Binks, director Colin Trevorrow, old pal, Jeff Goldblum  
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953 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 09 Jun 2022 at 3:10 PM (15 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



25 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-06-09 3:14:20 PM  
Because when I go into a big franchise movie I expect to see not phoning it in acting from any British actor doing a sitcom guest spot in the USA for sweeps
 
2022-06-09 3:17:42 PM  
I'm guessing both the headline and the review were written while a T-Rex was lumbering by and causing everything to shake. Whatever the movie is like, I bet it's less jumbled.
 
2022-06-09 3:23:02 PM  
 
2022-06-09 3:25:56 PM  
Eh, sounds like as good an excuse to eat popcorn as any.
 
2022-06-09 3:27:43 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-09 3:28:12 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-09 3:33:00 PM  
Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.
 
2022-06-09 3:39:22 PM  

EdgeRunner: I'm guessing both the headline and the review were written while a T-Rex was lumbering by and causing everything to shake. Whatever the movie is like, I bet it's less jumbled.


I wouldn't take that bet.
 
2022-06-09 3:46:19 PM  
last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.
 
2022-06-09 3:46:20 PM  

Trocadero: EdgeRunner: I'm guessing both the headline and the review were written while a T-Rex was lumbering by and causing everything to shake. Whatever the movie is like, I bet it's less jumbled.

I wouldn't take that bet.


As long as they give the backstory for Darth Tyranus-Sorus-Recks, and Blue and Owen finally consummate their forbidden love, I'll call it a win.
 
2022-06-09 3:47:34 PM  

Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.


Hollywood, uh, finds a way.
 
2022-06-09 3:50:05 PM  

Chemlight Battery: Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.

Hollywood, uh, finds a way.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2022-06-09 3:54:17 PM  

Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.


Up next will be the reboot or the increasingly popular thinly veiled reboot pretending to be a sequel.
 
2022-06-09 4:09:54 PM  

Copperbelly watersnake: Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.

Up next will be the reboot or the increasingly popular thinly veiled reboot pretending to be a sequel.


Rise of Newman.
 
2022-06-09 4:31:08 PM  

Clutch2013: Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.


"It may be shiat, but at least it's not stale. Bon appetit."
 
2022-06-09 4:45:29 PM  

stoli n coke: Clutch2013: Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.

"It may be shiat, but at least it's not stale. Bon appetit."


Plus it might have something none of those others do...
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-06-09 4:57:57 PM  

EdgeRunner: stoli n coke: Clutch2013: Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.

"It may be shiat, but at least it's not stale. Bon appetit."

Plus it might have something none of those others do...
[Fark user image 425x255] [View Full Size image _x_]


Jesus Christ, man. I guess I wasn't going to sleep tonight anyway.
 
2022-06-09 5:03:11 PM  

Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.


The next move is to focus on several streaming series offered exclusively through Universal All-Access. Each series will increasingly explore every facet of every character from the movies.

First up: The Theorist starring Jeff Goldblum as Ian Malcolm, a chaos theorist who must transport a baby velociraptor to safety

Next: The Book of Alan Grant exploring what Grant did during the years between Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park III (casting TBA)

Slated for late 2023: Jurassic Park: Hammond starring Colin Farrell as a young John Hammond and exploring the his creation of Jurassic Park
 
2022-06-09 5:21:36 PM  

UberSmyth: Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.

The next move is to focus on several streaming series offered exclusively through Universal All-Access. Each series will increasingly explore every facet of every character from the movies.

First up: The Theorist starring Jeff Goldblum as Ian Malcolm, a chaos theorist who must transport a baby velociraptor to safety

Next: The Book of Alan Grant exploring what Grant did during the years between Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park III (casting TBA)

Slated for late 2023: Jurassic Park: Hammond starring Colin Farrell as a young John Hammond and exploring the his creation of Jurassic Park


Don't forget  Jurassic MarsHumanity's last stand.

/It sounded better in my head.
 
2022-06-09 6:00:28 PM  

Mugato: EdgeRunner: stoli n coke: Clutch2013: Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.

"It may be shiat, but at least it's not stale. Bon appetit."

Plus it might have something none of those others do...
[Fark user image 425x255] [View Full Size image _x_]

Jesus Christ, man. I guess I wasn't going to sleep tonight anyway.


i.pinimg.comView Full Size

Every time I close my eyes...
I see Malcolm's chest arise...
 
2022-06-09 6:34:59 PM  
Congratulations failmitter on getting the worst headline ever submitted greenlit. Are you letting Drew plow you?
 
2022-06-09 8:12:39 PM  

EdgeRunner: stoli n coke: Clutch2013: Can't be any worse than Max Payne, Transformers: The Last Knight, or Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker.

"It may be shiat, but at least it's not stale. Bon appetit."

Plus it might have something none of those others do...
[Fark user image 425x255] [View Full Size image _x_]


I can not do it but here you go kid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0gWr-7TyyM
 
2022-06-10 12:12:46 AM  

Evil Mackerel: UberSmyth: Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.

The next move is to focus on several streaming series offered exclusively through Universal All-Access. Each series will increasingly explore every facet of every character from the movies.

First up: The Theorist starring Jeff Goldblum as Ian Malcolm, a chaos theorist who must transport a baby velociraptor to safety

Next: The Book of Alan Grant exploring what Grant did during the years between Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park III (casting TBA)

Slated for late 2023: Jurassic Park: Hammond starring Colin Farrell as a young John Hammond and exploring the his creation of Jurassic Park

Don't forget  Jurassic MarsHumanity's last stand.

/It sounded better in my head.


They'll start with Jurassic Mars.

The sequel will be Jurassic Mars: The Last Raptor.

The finale will be Jurassic Mars: Humanity's Last Stand (it's essentially War of the World but with dinosaurs instead of aliens.)

After that, a five year break, then the prequels begin.
 
2022-06-10 12:14:08 AM  

Mugato: last of the "Jurassic Park" movies

I doubt that.


When they bring it back the new Jurassic park will be on the Moon. The plot could be that the viability of a human created life supporting atmosphere on the Moon is tested using dinosaurs. This way dinosaurs can't harm people. Except to finance this, wealthy people are allowed to pay to go on guided dinosaur Moon safaris. Everything goes well until the dinosaurs learn to jump. On the low gravity Moon a T Rex jumping around is a terrifying sight. A T Rex jumping around while a Velociraptor is riding him is box office gold. This stuff writes itself.
 
2022-06-10 12:42:44 AM  
That article was basically one giant Dilophosaurus sized spoiler.
 
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