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(Fark)   Farkman #3 is out   ( farkman.com) divider line
    More: Wheaton  
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5608 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Mar 2002 at 8:00 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

203 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2002-03-04 08:02:25 AM  
Farkman is thrusting in the direction of the problem
2002-03-04 08:02:47 AM  
I missed #1 & #2....geez
2002-03-04 08:06:16 AM  
I'm liking Farkman. I just think the cartoons should go on a little longer. But hey, Great job to whoever's working on them.
2002-03-04 08:06:31 AM  

Why? Because it's about eight panels' worth of work. They're going to be much, much shorter than this in the future, but this one was a special case, since it's making up for the last one (which didn't have voting enabled) by it being a NINE-WAY TIE for writing ideas!

For next panelss, it's going to be like little 30 second things. For example:

Panel 15: The spaceship arrives.
Panel 16: A cow emerges from the ship.
Panel 17: The cow morphs into Rosie ODennel and announces her gayness.
Panel 18: She sprays the villagers with milk from her X9 Udder Cannon Uslurping Death Whatevers.

You get my point. I can get these done much quicker, they'll download much faster, and more people with dial-up (like ME) will watch them!

Good luck in the voting today! Wil for president!
2002-03-04 08:09:39 AM  
I say that in the future, Wil could be introduced as the evil genius who is sending out Anthrax letters (he got the Anthrax from his days on Star Trek: TNG) to politicans. He then decides to try messing with Farkman.
2002-03-04 08:10:11 AM  
That was more brutal then a good old fashioned cock and ball torture.
2002-03-04 08:13:20 AM  
2002-03-04 08:17:28 AM  
1: Needs more Wil Weaton
2: Bwahahaha!! The WEEEE squirrl is in there! Needs more WEEEE squirrl.
3: Maybe the WEEEE squirrl is Wil Weaton's sidekick.
2002-03-04 08:17:51 AM  
I think Farkman should try to learn more about his super powers by ordering from the vast library of farker Timothy's shiatty vanity-press self-help books.
2002-03-04 08:24:39 AM  
Parallax: These are getting really good, the anim is sweet and the voice overs are excellent. Don't worry about speed too much, im on a 33.6 connection and don't mind waiting at all.
2002-03-04 08:26:04 AM  
Farkman pops a boner
2002-03-04 08:28:59 AM  
Arg!!! I want to watch so bad, but my roommate is asleep! Don't want to spoil it for myself by seeing it with no sound! Blaaaaaaaaarrgo
2002-03-04 08:30:26 AM  
A pig sidekick named Porkgod turns up in evil Wil Weatons castle and gets an good old fashioned cock and ball torture!
2002-03-04 08:31:33 AM  
There should defientely be some Matrix style bullet dodging.

Maybe Evil Will Weaton could do some freaky experiment with that Mexican dog to make Batboy
2002-03-04 08:31:50 AM  
Muahahaha! kickbutt!

Farkmans main power should be his realtime photoshoping ability. That, and driving his enemies insane with Doo dah - phrases.
2002-03-04 08:32:17 AM  
that whole production was top-notch. I couldnt bear not to watch. What i would like to see is more of this.. just stick the most relevant/irrelevant online thingy in there. Yeah.
2002-03-04 08:34:34 AM  
ok .. i totally agree with Romulus that would be so kickass.. i cant even explain why. But dont have him just erasing things.. he has to change them.. into rubber chickens and other undeniably funny things.
2002-03-04 08:36:53 AM  
Farkman confronts Evil WIl to free cliche kitty. France surrenders for no apperent reason, confusing the hell out of Wil. During the confusion the animals escape. Nutsack squirrel and "Herve Vilichez" kick the crap out of the french (for no apperent reason).
2002-03-04 08:38:09 AM  
It won't work for me here at work. I think they've got video playing locked down on my computer. Sucks.
2002-03-04 08:40:41 AM  
Farkman drinks gallon of bleach.
2002-03-04 08:41:17 AM  
Get a new caracter to be "photoshop dude". Make sure he's of....

Wait for it

TURKISH decent.

He can "photoshop" evil wil's head onto a multitude of clip art old people.
2002-03-04 08:41:45 AM  
Hey, BTEzra420, the first 2 panels can be found on the Farkman link in the upper left corner of the main fark.com page.
2002-03-04 08:43:43 AM  
Three words: Bucket of Pelicans
2002-03-04 08:44:45 AM  
They keep getting better. Good job.
2002-03-04 08:45:15 AM  
CanuckGuy: I like your ideas, but introducing another character would make a hell of a lot of characters and I don't know Parallex, but a lot more work too. Oh yeah, your profile pic is busted! I can host it if you need too.
2002-03-04 08:47:56 AM  
Matrix Style bullet dodging is the most cliche, unfunny effect they use in comedies.

The animations for this flash comic are really great, but the storyline is
img.fark.netView Full Size
2002-03-04 08:53:16 AM  
nice sex & the city refrence on this one :)
2002-03-04 08:55:38 AM  
Farkman should have sex with the big boobied bar maid. When he cums she explodes.
2002-03-04 09:04:34 AM  
I stopped viewing farkman after the first episode.

Vote for me.
2002-03-04 09:11:24 AM  
Evil Wil Wheaton didn't used to be evil until he tried some of those stupid farking PHEROMONES he found on ebay while looking for b00bies.
2002-03-04 09:13:38 AM  
Walken should maybe make an appearance, and breakout in a little dance?
2002-03-04 09:20:44 AM  
By the way, that's really Wil's voice in there. Just in case nobody reads the credits.

He rocks out with his cock out.
2002-03-04 09:24:49 AM  
Wheaton laughs diabolicaly, which can be heard outside the PeTA fortress, which causes a tremor that causes the rock formation its built on to collapse into the river of blood/lava/whatever the fark it is.

What super power cliche kitty uses to escape will be determined in either the next panel, or if the next panel involves lesbian action between gratuity girl and farkwoman, the panel after that.
2002-03-04 09:26:34 AM  
Good job making the Peta Palace out to look like the Enterprise ;)

And Wil's captains chair is also cool
2002-03-04 09:28:13 AM  
Farkman should go on a 14 panel drinking binge. He needs some SERIOUS drinking practice since we just discovered that one pint floors him.
2002-03-04 09:29:54 AM  
Farkman needs to have christian-conservative as another enemy =)

and Wil should should become overlord of america =p
2002-03-04 09:32:15 AM  
While Evil Wil is still holding his nuts, Tux frees animals. Nutsack and Herve lead the attack, Cliche fetches Farkman for the confrontation!
2002-03-04 09:33:48 AM  
Let's hope Farkman and this whole terrible comic gets killed in the next episode.
2002-03-04 09:37:12 AM  
How about some religious zealot? CAPman?

Nice work on the animations and voiceovers.
2002-03-04 09:38:13 AM  
And photoshop guy should have some powers to alter reality by repainting it - think of that sappy robin williams movie about heaven or something, "What dreams may come" I think it was called.

And CanuckGuy's idea is great.
2002-03-04 09:41:37 AM  
Third really ugly pregnant barmaid appears. Turns out FB is the father.
2002-03-04 09:44:24 AM  
Parallax I saw on WWDN that he was doing voices for you, but I didn't want to post here as a spoiler. I'm at work, but won't watch it here... so I'll catch it when I get home.

I have ideas for the next one (or future episodes already)
2002-03-04 09:50:28 AM  
Evil Wil Wheaton informs Batboy that he is his Father, and trys to seduce him to the darkside. Or, Farkman rescues Vici from (Frenchie, Batboy, Admiral Alchohol, Satan Boy or FB-'s Father) from the constant stalking or stealing of her pictures.
2002-03-04 09:50:29 AM  
farkman! coolness to the max!
2002-03-04 09:55:11 AM  
Farkman should do some research on PETA in the next episode, in order to find weaknesses. While Farkman is preoccupied with researching the evil, Cliche Kitty and Nutsac Squirrel should plot together to break out of the fortress.
2002-03-04 09:55:44 AM  
Now with voting!

Farkman should do some research on PETA in the next episode, in order to find weaknesses. While Farkman is preoccupied with researching the evil, Cliche Kitty and Nutsac Squirrel should plot together to break out of the fortress.
2002-03-04 09:59:19 AM  

Yeah, definetely pineapples.
2002-03-04 10:01:23 AM  
Oops, that should read "definitely" not "definetely". Sorry.
2002-03-04 10:25:32 AM  
Farkman should complete his Fortress of Solid, Dude and put up a radon detector.
2002-03-04 10:28:17 AM  
As the animals escape, Evil Wil freezes Mr. Bigglesworth with the evil ray and Taco dog gets blasted into chili bean dip... Batboy flies in and eats the corpses (because he's batboy and that's what he does) Don't forget to have Nutsaq jump on Evil Wil's head and Teabag him real quick before fleeing with Cliche. Evil wil gets depressed and goes and humps his blow up Conselor Troi doll.
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