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(The Smoking Gun)   Man attempts to cleanse himself at restaurant. Next time just get your Taco Bell to go, Florida Man   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Fence, Criminal law, Crime, Bar, rap sheet, Kenneth Grey, Rights, trespassing suspect  
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2719 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 May 2022 at 4:31 PM (12 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



31 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-05-26 2:27:06 PM  
Charges vetoed since he's a white male with a sincerely held religious belief.
 
2022-05-26 4:38:59 PM  
I think we're over a trifecta.
 
2022-05-26 4:39:01 PM  
Come on, man. Save that behavior for church!
 
2022-05-26 4:40:41 PM  
I enjoy a good "spiritual cleansing" as much as the next person, but I have the decency to do that in the privacy of my own home.
 
2022-05-26 4:41:54 PM  
Ew.
 
2022-05-26 4:43:13 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


tfw you can only afford one line of hair replacement and just go for it
 
2022-05-26 4:48:48 PM  
Calling Taco Bell a Mexican restaurant is like me calling my Eggo with ketchup, Easy Cheese, and Bacos an authentic Italian pizza.
 
2022-05-26 4:51:29 PM  
Dude just wanted to enjoy some tacos al faptor?
 
2022-05-26 4:53:18 PM  
When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays
 
2022-05-26 4:53:32 PM  

gameshowhost: [Fark user image 265x331]

tfw you can only afford one line of hair replacement and just go for it


Looks like that Beard Completer product finally worked!

RiffTrax: Magical Disappearing Money (Full FREE Short)
Youtube s4iPl4KcebU
 
2022-05-26 4:55:01 PM  
Dude
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-26 4:55:09 PM  

ComaToast: Calling Taco Bell a Mexican restaurant is like me calling my Eggo with ketchup, Easy Cheese, and Bacos an authentic Italian pizza.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-26 5:01:38 PM  

bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays


That's your record?

Lsacker
 
2022-05-26 5:08:08 PM  
The evangelical apocalyptic bullshiat that passes for religion coupled with a couple centuries of sexual assault that's come out of various sects of the American religions, I'd say he has a reasonably good religious freedom defense.

Especially in Florida. Every ass hat has a new evangelical religion to sell ya down here.
 
2022-05-26 5:08:56 PM  
Seriously, what farking religion tells its followers to "spiritually cleanse" by masturbating in front of a Taco Bell at 2 in the morning? I wanna see that scripture.
 
2022-05-26 5:14:33 PM  

Wessoman: Seriously, what farking religion tells its followers to "spiritually cleanse" by masturbating in front of a Taco Bell at 2 in the morning? I wanna see that scripture.


Would you like to subscribe to my newsletter?
 
2022-05-26 5:16:09 PM  

EnderWiggnz: bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays

That's your record?


That's my average.

It's been slipping lately.
 
2022-05-26 5:19:09 PM  

bughunter: EnderWiggnz: bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays

That's your record?

That's my average.

It's been slipping chaffing lately.


FTFY
 
2022-05-26 5:20:44 PM  

cwheelie: bughunter: EnderWiggnz: bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays

That's your record?

That's my average.

It's been slipping chaffing lately.

FTFY


I blame the nipple thread.
 
2022-05-26 5:24:12 PM  

fragMasterFlash: Dude just wanted to enjoy some tacos al faptor?



Someday, there will be another Mexican restaurant masturbation news article.  I'll be ready.
i.imgflip.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-26 5:28:12 PM  

cwheelie: bughunter: EnderWiggnz: bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays

That's your record?

That's my average.

It's been slipping chaffing lately.

FTFY

Needs moar Grease, and you would think Taco Bell had enough.
 
2022-05-26 5:32:49 PM  

ComaToast: Calling Taco Bell a Mexican restaurant is like me calling my Eggo with ketchup, Easy Cheese, and Bacos an authentic Italian pizza.


You throw some poop, and other bodily fluids a dead  baby, somehow work in your mom, and you have:

Pizza, The Aristocrats!
 
2022-05-26 5:36:21 PM  
There was no Taco Bell involved at any point in this incident.
It occurred at a Red Mesa Cantina, according to the article.
 
2022-05-26 5:39:52 PM  
"Why didn't you show up to standup?"

"I was cleansing myself spiritually"
 
2022-05-26 5:41:13 PM  

gameshowhost: [Fark user image 265x331]

tfw you can only afford one line of hair replacement and just go for it


Sigh. Don't. Just don't.
 
2022-05-26 6:06:51 PM  
If i need a cleansing, I'll have a bran muffin, thank you.
 
2022-05-26 6:44:46 PM  

bughunter: When I was 15, I must have been the most spiritually clean person on the planet.

I spiritually cleansed in the shower every day.  Three times on Sunday.

/Solid Gold aired on Sundays


Palm Sunday?
 
2022-05-26 6:47:26 PM  

Valter: gameshowhost: [Fark user image 265x331]

tfw you can only afford one line of hair replacement and just go for it

Sigh. Don't. Just don't.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-26 6:55:49 PM  

gameshowhost: Valter: gameshowhost: [Fark user image 265x331]

tfw you can only afford one line of hair replacement and just go for it

Sigh. Don't. Just don't.

[Fark user image 474x232]


Too late or too soon?
 
2022-05-26 7:41:33 PM  
I was expecting it to be that he ate a lot of their food in an attempt to perform a particularly violent and extreme colon cleansing blast.

Fark user imageView Full Size


/btw I have eaten their food and found it to be mediocre, cheap and perfectly harmless as far as my gastrointestinal tract was concerned. Perfectly edible stuff. It's just a joke. Please don't respond with angry defences of Taco Bell food or insinuations that my own internals were able to take it in stride due to experience from years of eating British food kthxluvyabye.
 
2022-05-27 1:56:30 AM  

New Rising Sun: fragMasterFlash: Dude just wanted to enjoy some tacos al faptor?


Someday, there will be another Mexican restaurant masturbation news article.  I'll be ready.
[i.imgflip.com image 217x474]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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