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(SoraNews24)   Japanese man has police called on him for the heinous crime of not updating his old tech   (soranews24.com) divider line
    More: Silly, Asahi Shimbun, Mobile phone, Tōhoku region, Laptop, Prefectures of Japan, GSM, Blade, Nikkan Sports  
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5076 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 May 2022 at 2:55 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



44 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-05-21 1:37:29 PM  
The next natural step is to embed a blade in the phone.
 
2022-05-21 1:49:30 PM  

beezeltown: The next natural step is to embed a blade in the phone.


They already had a Razr....
 
2022-05-21 1:50:12 PM  
I went to Slough in England back in 1995.  I remember wandering about the town late at night and calling 0118 999 881 999 119 7253 because there were a lot of boxes outside the Oxfam offices.

/stupid me thought they were IRA bombs, I had no idea what Oxfam was/is
 
2022-05-21 1:54:22 PM  
it might not be a flip phone but my dad, before he passed, had one of those old candy bar sliders. I always said he would end up with a smart phone but he just didn't want one. With AT&T upgrading their network to 5G and dropping 3G support, they mailed him a new phone to use. A flip phone with 4G. Sadly, he never used it and now it just sits in the box until I take it to them one day and give it back.
 
2022-05-21 3:02:42 PM  
The Japanese cops went, investigated, and cleared-up the misunderstanding.

Meanwhile in 'Murricah: A Black man would've been shot and strangled while a SWAT team stormed his home to terrify his wife/kids and summarily executed his dogs.

*not necessarily in that order
 
2022-05-21 3:07:10 PM  
American police arrived on the scene and kneeled on the phone's neck until it was no longer a threat.
 
2022-05-21 3:09:53 PM  
Alternative headline:

"Goody Two-Shoes Teen Knows No Drug Dealers"
 
TWX
2022-05-21 3:23:30 PM  
I had one of these:

cnet.comView Full Size


It was a very good phone, easy to carry compared to what I'd had to deal with before, and it seemed to fit my hand well despite how thin it was when opened.

I suspect that the folding nature meant that I could actually get the mic and speaker where they needed to be without worrying about the side of my face activating any functions of the phone against my intentions.
 
2022-05-21 3:24:30 PM  
I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
TWX
2022-05-21 3:26:24 PM  

Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image 160x212]


In black it would look like the phone sent by Morpheus to Neo in the first Matrix film.

/wanted that phone SO BAD
//and it wasn't actually a real phone either
///just a prop made to be springy
 
2022-05-21 3:30:58 PM  

TWX: In black it would look like the phone sent by Morpheus to Neo in the first Matrix film.


You might find this interesting...
 
2022-05-21 3:35:54 PM  
Went to a flip phone when my Nokia died... got a Samsung Rugby.. great phone, but 3g, so got an Alcatel flip when 3g went south... it works, but nowhere as good as the Rugby.. not going to get a death machine 'smart' phone.   Humanity doesn't have much intelligence at this point, as shown by daily deaths just from distraction alone..  roll over crashes, both car and truck, used to be rare.. used to be.... of course SUVs with a high center of gravity are a big part of that, but the distraction starts it.. working on an AC system last week, and saw a teen walk out in the street with his face in his phone.. wham !  got nailed by a camaro.. he died.  no loss, already brain dead..
 
2022-05-21 3:39:25 PM  

Dinjiin: Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 3:43:45 PM  
My Uncle Steve had a suitcase phone, circa 1987 or 1988.  Between that and his ego, he needed a cart to carry them around.  Amazingly, by the time phones got small enough to carry around in a pocket, Steve's ego diminished and he actually became an alright guy.
 
2022-05-21 3:44:39 PM  
garakei

god i hate that kid

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 3:50:04 PM  

beezeltown: The next natural step is to embed a blade in the phone.


Why not, they already had one that was a gun.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/phoney-guns/
 
2022-05-21 3:52:26 PM  

Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image image 160x212]


That's not a banana phone, this is:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 4:01:08 PM  

TWX: I had one of these:

[cnet.com image 527x395]

It was a very good phone, easy to carry compared to what I'd had to deal with before, and it seemed to fit my hand well despite how thin it was when opened.

I suspect that the folding nature meant that I could actually get the mic and speaker where they needed to be without worrying about the side of my face activating any functions of the phone against my intentions.


I had one as well. Loved it. Tough phone. I dropped it off a parking garage, five floors to the ground. Not a mark. It did land in grass.
 
2022-05-21 4:03:47 PM  

Herr Flick's Revenge: Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image image 160x212]

That's not a banana phone, this is:
[Fark user image image 333x500]


It's nice that they identified the stem in the diagram.
 
2022-05-21 4:20:36 PM  
Kids can't imagine someone not wanting the latest bleeding edge gadget since an older model phone proves you are a loser.
 
2022-05-21 4:29:58 PM  
I LIVED THIS STORY.
Until a few years ago, I had a perfectly good 4G folder phone (which people call flip phones, though that's a specific style of early folder phone which was discontinued decades ago) and I had set it down on my desk. One of my late-20's co-workers, in complete seriousness, asked me flat out what it was. "Uh, it's my phone." He said he'd thought it was a handheld wifi scanner or something.

I got a smartphone eventually, but only because the provider was quietly disabling features, claiming that the network didn't support them... like texting and emailing. Which it always had before, heh.
 
2022-05-21 4:30:22 PM  

Herr Flick's Revenge: Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image image 160x212]

That's not a banana phone, this is:
[Fark user image image 333x500]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 4:35:33 PM  

ski9600: I went to Slough in England back in 1995.  I remember wandering about the town late at night and calling 0118 999 881 999 119 7253 because there were a lot of boxes outside the Oxfam offices.

/stupid me thought they were IRA bombs, I had no idea what Oxfam was/is


Don't feel bad. Lots of people don't know what traffic monitoring boxes look like so it is not unusual to get reports of roadside bombs triggered by those.  Maybe this was more prevalent during Iraq invasion when all you heard was IED this and IED that.  Then there is Boston level stupidity.

upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 4:56:14 PM  

OgreMagi: Kids can't imagine someone not wanting the latest bleeding edge gadget since an older model phone proves you are a loser.


Cops can't imagine a minority having the latest tech gadget and they'll make them bleed for it.  Recently LAPD blasted away at a guy who they said was shooting at houses with his cellphone.  In an amazing bit of confirmation bias, they said they saw him shoot yet no shots could be heard on their recording. Cops pulled a Tamir Rice on him. Even after they knew it was a phone, police wanted to charge the guy with ADW. The DA wisely declined to prosecute.
 
2022-05-21 4:58:07 PM  

SimonElectric: OgreMagi: Kids can't imagine someone not wanting the latest bleeding edge gadget since an older model phone proves you are a loser.

Cops can't imagine a minority having the latest tech gadget and they'll make them bleed for it.  Recently LAPD blasted away at a guy who they said was shooting at houses with his cellphone.  In an amazing bit of confirmation bias, they said they saw him shoot yet no shots could be heard on their recording. Cops pulled a Tamir Rice on him. Even after they knew it was a phone, police wanted to charge the guy with ADW. The DA wisely declined to prosecute.


And that will keep happening so long as there are no consequences for the cops.
 
2022-05-21 5:21:38 PM  

ski9600: I went to Slough in England back in 1995.  I remember wandering about the town late at night and calling 0118 999 881 999 119 7253 because there were a lot of boxes outside the Oxfam offices.

/stupid me thought they were IRA bombs, I had no idea what Oxfam was/is


Did they show up with a bomb disposal robot that used the Vista OS?
 
2022-05-21 5:36:17 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 5:39:18 PM  

OgreMagi: Kids can't imagine someone not wanting the latest bleeding edge gadget since an older model phone proves you are a loser.


So does that make me a "hipster", since I don't have or want a leash?
Wait; is "hipster" still cool?
Wait, is "cool" still a thing?
 
2022-05-21 6:05:10 PM  
Raffi - Banana phone (Original)
Youtube S83qcVr2xjg
 
2022-05-21 6:48:27 PM  

Bslim: The Japanese cops went, investigated, and cleared-up the misunderstanding.

Meanwhile in 'Murricah: A Black man would've been shot and strangled while a SWAT team stormed his home to terrify his wife/kids and summarily executed his dogs.

*not necessarily in that order


Well the guy wasn't black, he was Japanese, duh.
 
2022-05-21 7:01:17 PM  

isamudyson: it might not be a flip phone but my dad, before he passed, had one of those old candy bar sliders. I always said he would end up with a smart phone but he just didn't want one. With AT&T upgrading their network to 5G and dropping 3G support, they mailed him a new phone to use. A flip phone with 4G. Sadly, he never used it and now it just sits in the box until I take it to them one day and give it back.


Mom swore up and down for years she would never, EVER get a smart phone. Didn't need one, didn't want one, she said.

The day after her doctor told her she had lung cancer, she went out and bought herself an iPhone and an iPad. And she kept both of them until the day she died. (They were in her personal effects from the hospital.)
 
2022-05-21 7:11:34 PM  
I upgraded my old tech: from a Go Flip 3 to a Go Flip 4.  I'm retired, I have two 29" monitors on my computer and the only calls/texts I get are from medical clinics or repair people. And rarely from my wife, when she doesn't want to leave her office upstairs and hang over the balcony to talk.

Some times when we are traveling, having a smartphone can be useful though. My wife also upgraded her old tech, from a Samsung 5S to a 20. Only because we changed providers and she got a deal. I had a lot of trouble with the touch screen on the 5. The screen only "saw" my fingers at the very edges of the screen and only when I didn't want it to. The 20 works.

/The Go Flip 4 has in excess of 14 days standby on a charge.
 
2022-05-21 7:49:24 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 8:14:46 PM  
I can't see how any phone could look like a Japanese hand saw, Still, out of all my tools, hunting knives, and chef's knives, my Japanese hand saws are by far the best weapons.  They tear through human skin, like it was tissue paper.
 
2022-05-21 8:46:03 PM  

Austinoftx: I LIVED THIS STORY.
Until a few years ago, I had a perfectly good 4G folder phone (which people call flip phones, though that's a specific style of early folder phone which was discontinued decades ago) and I had set it down on my desk. One of my late-20's co-workers, in complete seriousness, asked me flat out what it was. "Uh, it's my phone." He said he'd thought it was a handheld wifi scanner or something.

I got a smartphone eventually, but only because the provider was quietly disabling features, claiming that the network didn't support them... like texting and emailing. Which it always had before, heh.


I had the opposite. In 2005 most people were carrying phones like this one.
Fark user imageView Full Size


Meanwhile I had this hand-sized smartphone.
Fark user imageView Full Size


People had no idea what it was. They thought it was a little laptop computer. I was thrown out of a library for using it once.
 
2022-05-21 10:09:05 PM  

Gordon Bennett: Austinoftx: I LIVED THIS STORY.
Until a few years ago, I had a perfectly good 4G folder phone (which people call flip phones, though that's a specific style of early folder phone which was discontinued decades ago) and I had set it down on my desk. One of my late-20's co-workers, in complete seriousness, asked me flat out what it was. "Uh, it's my phone." He said he'd thought it was a handheld wifi scanner or something.

I got a smartphone eventually, but only because the provider was quietly disabling features, claiming that the network didn't support them... like texting and emailing. Which it always had before, heh.

I had the opposite. In 2005 most people were carrying phones like this one.
[Fark user image image 736x1156]

Meanwhile I had this hand-sized smartphone.
[Fark user image image 850x446]

People had no idea what it was. They thought it was a little laptop computer. I was thrown out of a library for using it once.


Why would a library throw you out for assuming that?
 
2022-05-21 10:09:23 PM  
*when they assumed that.
 
2022-05-21 10:14:03 PM  
People Are The Worst | Seinfeld
Youtube CJXejD_FEXs
 
2022-05-21 10:22:56 PM  
Behold!

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-21 10:26:09 PM  

The_Sponge: Gordon Bennett: Austinoftx: I LIVED THIS STORY.
Until a few years ago, I had a perfectly good 4G folder phone (which people call flip phones, though that's a specific style of early folder phone which was discontinued decades ago) and I had set it down on my desk. One of my late-20's co-workers, in complete seriousness, asked me flat out what it was. "Uh, it's my phone." He said he'd thought it was a handheld wifi scanner or something.

I got a smartphone eventually, but only because the provider was quietly disabling features, claiming that the network didn't support them... like texting and emailing. Which it always had before, heh.

I had the opposite. In 2005 most people were carrying phones like this one.
[Fark user image image 736x1156]

Meanwhile I had this hand-sized smartphone.
[Fark user image image 850x446]

People had no idea what it was. They thought it was a little laptop computer. I was thrown out of a library for using it once.

Why would a library throw you out for assuming that?


I'm not sure. I was just told that it Wasn't Allowed.
 
2022-05-21 10:41:42 PM  

Gordon Bennett: The_Sponge: Gordon Bennett: Austinoftx: I LIVED THIS STORY.
Until a few years ago, I had a perfectly good 4G folder phone (which people call flip phones, though that's a specific style of early folder phone which was discontinued decades ago) and I had set it down on my desk. One of my late-20's co-workers, in complete seriousness, asked me flat out what it was. "Uh, it's my phone." He said he'd thought it was a handheld wifi scanner or something.

I got a smartphone eventually, but only because the provider was quietly disabling features, claiming that the network didn't support them... like texting and emailing. Which it always had before, heh.

I had the opposite. In 2005 most people were carrying phones like this one.
[Fark user image image 736x1156]

Meanwhile I had this hand-sized smartphone.
[Fark user image image 850x446]

People had no idea what it was. They thought it was a little laptop computer. I was thrown out of a library for using it once.

Why would a library throw you out for assuming that?

I'm not sure. I was just told that it Wasn't Allowed.


Well that sucks.
 
2022-05-21 11:06:15 PM  

Ragin' Asian: Behold!

[Fark user image 425x253]


I have the less Goatse looking QD model of that one. I quite like it.

Fark user imageView Full Size

Nokia fixed the major problems of the original with this one. You don't need to remove the battery to change game cartridges. No sidetalking. Mind you, after using it I understand why they put sidetalking in in the first place. That screen gets covered with skin oil very quickly when held against your cheek to talk.

Aside from that, it runs all of the thousands of Java/Symbian games of its time with the benefit of a functional D-pad and buttons in addition to its own small exclusive games library which does have a few gems in it. When it launched it was definitely overpriced for what it was, but when the price dropped to the equivalent of a Gameboy it was a good buy for a mobile phone and gaming device in one. For me looking to buy one to use during my visits with family in the US, the choice between a phone built for games or one built not for games was obvious.
 
2022-05-21 11:42:41 PM  

The_Sponge: Herr Flick's Revenge: Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image image 160x212]

That's not a banana phone, this is:
[Fark user image image 333x500]

[Fark user image 425x319]


Okay, now I have to tell an old joke:

"Excuse me, but you have a banana in your ear."

"What?"

"I said, you have a banana in your ear."

"Huh?"

"I SAID, YOU HAVE A BANANA IN YOUR EAR!"

"You'll have to speak up.  I have a banana in my ear."
 
2022-05-21 11:49:30 PM  

Creepy Lurker Guy: The_Sponge: Herr Flick's Revenge: Dinjiin: I was recently in a retirement community visiting a friend and I was amazed at the number of flip phones people had.  I knew that Acatel, LG, and Nokia make 4G-LTE flip phones, but it was weird actually seeing them in person.

Although it isn't a flip phone, I kinda dig the Nokia banana phone:

[Fark user image image 160x212]

That's not a banana phone, this is:
[Fark user image image 333x500]

[Fark user image 425x319]

Okay, now I have to tell an old joke:

"Excuse me, but you have a banana in your ear."

"What?"

"I said, you have a banana in your ear."

"Huh?"

"I SAID, YOU HAVE A BANANA IN YOUR EAR!"

"You'll have to speak up.  I have a banana in my ear."


I snickered.

/Thank you.
//I needed that.
///Felt like crap all day...damn pollen.
 
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