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(Twitter)   Alex Jones tells on himself yet again. Obvious tag trumps weeners   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, shot  
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3551 clicks; posted to Politics » on 20 May 2022 at 5:41 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



126 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2022-05-19 10:20:21 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-05-19 10:25:31 PM  
What was he doing with his penis in a soda can?
 
2022-05-19 10:29:47 PM  
Your move, Clarence Thomas
 
2022-05-19 10:30:33 PM  
Alex "Dick" Jones
 
2022-05-19 10:38:10 PM  
He must spend a lot of time observing penises.
 
2022-05-19 10:56:02 PM  
Alex says the (((globalist))) plot also affects girls: "3 year-old girls are now having periods. 5 year-old girls are now getting pregnant, because these chemicals hyper-feminize females and feminize males."

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-19 11:03:58 PM  
The penises haven't gotten smaller, Alex. Your mouth has just gotten bigger.
 
2022-05-19 11:23:11 PM  
I so hate that I have had to learn what these antisemitic racist conspiracy loon words mean to decipher a mainstream political block that threatens the existence of US democracy
 
2022-05-19 11:27:53 PM  
a third of the size they were of a 1960s male .. and the sperm counts are down 96%

I think Jones is pulling penis essentials out of his ass.

Also, he's making up the numbers.
 
2022-05-20 12:18:08 AM  
He's just making excuses for what his "supplements" did to his little Jones.
 
2022-05-20 1:51:42 AM  
If 5 year old girls are getting pregnant, someone must be poking them with a tiny weener.

/If what I have heard about the practice is correct
 
2022-05-20 2:22:08 AM  
I don't drink soft drinks. Call me ladies. 😉🍆
 
2022-05-20 3:09:40 AM  

OdradekRex: What was he doing with his penis in a soda can?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 3:10:01 AM  
If I speak too long, my voice sounds like an Alex Jones impression, but I can't do the topics he gets up to.
 
2022-05-20 5:45:57 AM  

OdradekRex: What was he doing with his penis in a soda can?


Ask Clarence Thomas.
 
2022-05-20 5:46:39 AM  

clintster: Your move, Clarence Thomas


*shakes fist*
 
2022-05-20 5:48:08 AM  
Guys will come up with any excuse...."I was in the pool! I was guzzling diet Coke!"
 
2022-05-20 5:52:01 AM  
Just because this happened to him doesn't necessarily mean it's a trend.

His wife did kick his a**, tho
 
2022-05-20 5:53:33 AM  
Jesus Christ, dude.
 
2022-05-20 5:54:52 AM  
"3 year-old girls are now having periods. 5 year-old girls are now getting pregnant, because these chemicals hyper-feminize females and feminize males."

So, wait, if the chemicals feminize the males then who is impregnating these 5 year olds?
 
2022-05-20 5:59:35 AM  

OdradekRex: What was he doing with his penis in a soda can?


Anything's a Fleshlight if you're brave enough.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 5:59:36 AM  
It's not difficult to locate images of naturists hanging out on nude beaches or at nudist resorts in the 1950's and 1960's, that was about as hot as porn got back then so it was popular material and a lot of it has survived.

They look exactly the same as modern images of people doing the same thing today.

One can only conclude that Alex Jones thinks John Holmes represents every guy's wang in the 60's/70's.

And they're obviously much bigger than centuries ago ... looking at you, Michelangelo's David.
 
2022-05-20 6:03:13 AM  
He should just go back to yelling at dog turds in the street. It was a look that suited him well.
 
2022-05-20 6:03:46 AM  

Aussie_As: It's not difficult to locate images of naturists hanging out on nude beaches or at nudist resorts in the 1950's and 1960's, that was about as hot as porn got back then so it was popular material and a lot of it has survived.

They look exactly the same as modern images of people doing the same thing today.

One can only conclude that Alex Jones thinks John Holmes represents every guy's wang in the 60's/70's.

And they're obviously much bigger than centuries ago ... looking at you, Michelangelo's David.


In fairness, the male beauty ideal at that time and place preferred smaller penises.

I also learned that having one's glans exposed was considered a serious faux-pas, to the point that a kind of cord was devised to tie off the foreskin and then bind up about the waist to prevent accidental exposure.

Fark user imageView Full Size


Fashion is weird.
 
2022-05-20 6:05:06 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 6:09:12 AM  

MrBallou: a third of the size they were of a 1960s male .. and the sperm counts are down 96%

I think Jones is pulling penis essentials out of his ass.

Also, he's making up the numbers.


The gay frogs whisper their secrets in his ears, we cannot hear them.  We do not understand.  We are not worthy.  We will never know the true love of the gay frogs, and soon we will lament.  There will be no mercy, no reprieve.  Only Alex and the frogs, pulling a train the size of Montana

/spoilers: Alex drowns in frog cum at the end
 
2022-05-20 6:12:10 AM  
I tried to find any supporting proof (hahahahaha) of his claim and did find this interesting article:
The Incredible Shrinking Man
*that's the joke
 
2022-05-20 6:13:15 AM  
So guys in the 60s had 24" dongs?

I don't believe you Alex.

/He's obsessed with dicks.
//NTTAWWT
 
2022-05-20 6:13:26 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: MrBallou: a third of the size they were of a 1960s male .. and the sperm counts are down 96%

I think Jones is pulling penis essentials out of his ass.

Also, he's making up the numbers.

The gay frogs whisper their secrets in his ears, we cannot hear them.  We do not understand.  We are not worthy.  We will never know the true love of the gay frogs, and soon we will lament.  There will be no mercy, no reprieve.  Only Alex and the frogs, pulling a train the size of Montana

/spoilers: Alex drowns in frog cum at the end


Mr. Garrison? Is that you?
 
2022-05-20 6:13:40 AM  
Ya know, there are actually evolutionary reasons for having smaller testes when you look at the mating habits of Reeses monkies and Silverbacks and compare teste size, sperm count and mating patterns, and figure humans fall between them.

But, I said evolution and lost you loooong ago.
 
2022-05-20 6:17:30 AM  
Good old Ron, helping expand the platform of insane Nazis. Helping them reach new audiences. What a guy.
 
2022-05-20 6:20:07 AM  

HerptheDerp: Ya know, there are actually evolutionary reasons for having smaller testes when you look at the mating habits of Reeses monkies and Silverbacks and compare teste size, sperm count and mating patterns, and figure humans fall between them.

But, I said evolution and lost you loooong ago.


Did you mean "rhesus monkeys" or these cute little guys?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 6:20:23 AM  

aagrajag: Some Junkie Cosmonaut: MrBallou: a third of the size they were of a 1960s male .. and the sperm counts are down 96%

I think Jones is pulling penis essentials out of his ass.

Also, he's making up the numbers.

The gay frogs whisper their secrets in his ears, we cannot hear them.  We do not understand.  We are not worthy.  We will never know the true love of the gay frogs, and soon we will lament.  There will be no mercy, no reprieve.  Only Alex and the frogs, pulling a train the size of Montana

/spoilers: Alex drowns in frog cum at the end

Mr. Garrison? Is that you?


Who is this Mr. Garrison?  I have no idea what you're talking about and I have two rippling Alex Jones pecs to draw before I can start doing the frog cum flood.  I'm too busy for your inane insinuations!

/I'd imagine they really do ripple in the technical sense
//just not the particularly attractive sense
///unless you're a frog maybe?  Who knows
 
2022-05-20 6:22:06 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: MrBallou: a third of the size they were of a 1960s male .. and the sperm counts are down 96%

I think Jones is pulling penis essentials out of his ass.

Also, he's making up the numbers.

The gay frogs whisper their secrets in his ears, we cannot hear them.  We do not understand.  We are not worthy.  We will never know the true love of the gay frogs, and soon we will lament.  There will be no mercy, no reprieve.  Only Alex and the frogs, pulling a train the size of Montana

/spoilers: Alex drowns in frog cum at the end


Amplexus is weird.
 
2022-05-20 6:22:10 AM  
These people are all of extremely low character.
 
2022-05-20 6:23:44 AM  

aagrajag: HerptheDerp: Ya know, there are actually evolutionary reasons for having smaller testes when you look at the mating habits of Reeses monkies and Silverbacks and compare teste size, sperm count and mating patterns, and figure humans fall between them.

But, I said evolution and lost you loooong ago.

Did you mean "rhesus monkeys" or these cute little guys?

[Fark user image image 425x425]


Rhesus.

I can't look words up on the phone or I lose the post.
 
2022-05-20 6:27:59 AM  
RESEARCH!

upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 6:30:52 AM  

strapp3r: RESEARCH!

[upload.wikimedia.org image 640x480]


This gloryhole has been brought to you by the man nicknamed "The Firehose".
 
2022-05-20 6:31:08 AM  
Andy Kaufman didn't die, he is running around disguised as maniacs like Alex Jones, Joe Rogan, Ted Cruz, etc.  Just saying the most bizzarre things he can think of.
 
2022-05-20 6:34:11 AM  
 
2022-05-20 6:34:59 AM  
A third of the sizes? So if I was alive in the 1960s, I would've had an 18" weiner? It's a good thing I drink a lot of soda. I don't think I could get that all the way in without it stabbing through her heart.
 
2022-05-20 6:35:32 AM  
Conservatives of late are really obsessed about human sexuality with an emphasis on genitalia. This loss of manhood seems to be another manifestation of the same thing.   WTF is up with all of this?
 
2022-05-20 6:36:10 AM  
How many diet cokes does trump drink per day?
 
2022-05-20 6:38:11 AM  

dogdaze: Conservatives of late are really obsessed about human sexuality with an emphasis on genitalia. This loss of manhood seems to be another manifestation of the same thing.   WTF is up with all of this?


This sh*t ain't new. In fact, it even has a name:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koro_(medicine)

The psychological causes are likely rather similar.
 
2022-05-20 6:38:20 AM  
So why are the globalist doing this?
 
2022-05-20 6:38:26 AM  

HerptheDerp: aagrajag: HerptheDerp: Ya know, there are actually evolutionary reasons for having smaller testes when you look at the mating habits of Reeses monkies and Silverbacks and compare teste size, sperm count and mating patterns, and figure humans fall between them.

But, I said evolution and lost you loooong ago.

Did you mean "rhesus monkeys" or these cute little guys?

[Fark user image image 425x425]

Rhesus.

I can't look words up on the phone or I lose the post.


Rebus monkeys obviously

Fark user image
 
2022-05-20 6:40:54 AM  

OdradekRex: What was he doing with his penis in a soda can?


You don't want to know
 
2022-05-20 6:42:06 AM  
preview.redd.itView Full Size

MASTER CYLINDER!

 
2022-05-20 6:43:17 AM  
Don't worry it's only in the liner of
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-20 6:46:04 AM  

BeesNuts: [preview.redd.it image 500x375]MASTER CYLINDER!


Boosh!
 
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