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(Twitter)   Jack Burkman's latest press release is really something   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, shot  
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3395 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 May 2022 at 4:39 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-05-17 3:27:33 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2022-05-17 3:35:56 PM  
This is totally an Onion piece.  Look at it.  This can't possibly be serious.  I know Wohlverpeen, but even for him this is beyond self-parody.

/All in all, it's just another dick in Jake Wohl
 
2022-05-17 3:36:54 PM  
*I know it's.  I don't know him personally, as evidenced by the simple fact that I haven't killed myself.
 
2022-05-17 3:37:49 PM  
Perfect:

pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 3:41:15 PM  
Is this peak stigginit?

"Lookit me Liberals, YOU DID THIS TO ME!"
 
2022-05-17 3:44:44 PM  
"... celebrated lobbyist Jack Burkman..."

Only 'celebrating' involving him will be when he's dead.
 
2022-05-17 3:44:45 PM  
Sure, he's totally going to starve himself because of fraud. Totes. He's a martyr for the cause.

I believe in his 'hunger strike' about as much as his son's 'security team.'
 
2022-05-17 3:45:46 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: "... celebrated lobbyist Jack Burkman..."

Only 'celebrating' involving him will be when he's dead.


No, they celebrated him when he was bringing in illegal donations. They gave him mad props.
 
2022-05-17 3:45:50 PM  

enry: Is this peak stigginit?

"Lookit me Liberals, YOU DID THIS TO ME!"


You're welcome.  And there's more where that came from, for anyone who wants it.
 
2022-05-17 3:46:39 PM  

hubiestubert: Nicholas D. Wolfwood: "... celebrated lobbyist Jack Burkman..."

Only 'celebrating' involving him will be when he's dead.

No, they celebrated him when he was bringing in illegal donations. They gave him mad props.


I'm referring to sane people.
 
2022-05-17 3:54:06 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 3:54:45 PM  
external-content.duckduckgo.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 3:54:58 PM  
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2022-05-17 3:56:30 PM  
Also, how the fark much did he weigh that he currently weighs 147 after a month of fasting?  (Ignoring that he'd actually be dead if he went that long)
 
2022-05-17 3:57:30 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

And by me I mean you.
 
2022-05-17 4:14:04 PM  
A respectable coke and vodka binge can be pretty slimming.
 
2022-05-17 4:31:12 PM  
And I bet he wonders why Madison Cawthorn doesn't invite him to cocaine orgies anymore.
 
2022-05-17 4:42:16 PM  

Breaker Moran: A respectable coke and vodka binge can be pretty slimming.


Yes, but have you tried cocaine?  Sorry I wasn't listening.
 
2022-05-17 4:42:37 PM  
Well, bye.
 
2022-05-17 4:42:57 PM  
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2022-05-17 4:43:21 PM  
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2022-05-17 4:43:57 PM  
Temple Of The Dog - Hunger Strike
Youtube VUb450Alpps
 
2022-05-17 4:44:10 PM  
I had happily forgotten about those two sh#twits, subby * glares *
 
2022-05-17 4:44:26 PM  
Seems like a good excuse to rescind his own recognizance bond, put him in a prison hospital, and force feed him.
 
2022-05-17 4:45:06 PM  

fragMasterFlash: And I bet he wonders why Madison Cawthorn doesn't invite him to cocaine orgies anymore.


And wont let him borrow any bras.
 
2022-05-17 4:45:18 PM  

Psychopusher: Also, how the fark much did he weigh that he currently weighs 147 after a month of fasting?  (Ignoring that he'd actually be dead if he went that long)


Oh that's easy, he weighs about the same now as he did then. It was a lie.

He and Jacob are well established liars, with a long history of making lies in public, and getting caught in ham-fisted attempts at manufacturing more lies about people they want to harm politically. Plus, they're "conservatives", a cohort which eagerly embraces lies - nay, demands them - and likes them more the more outrageous they get.

"Conservatives" lie. It's what they do.
 
2022-05-17 4:45:33 PM  
But is his fly zipped?
 
2022-05-17 4:45:43 PM  
nelson haha dot jpg
 
2022-05-17 4:45:43 PM  
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2022-05-17 4:46:34 PM  
ladbible.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 4:47:55 PM  

Grungehamster: [Fark user image 425x511]


Duh, he's lost density. Still plenty dense, though.
 
2022-05-17 4:48:20 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Often times, I think the first amendment needs to be more like a social media site.
 
2022-05-17 4:48:22 PM  
Lost ALL his hair?  Yeah, no.  What he's done is shave his head and plop his fed ass in a wheelchair because he's part of a drama queen duo.
 
2022-05-17 4:48:57 PM  

hubiestubert: Sure, he's totally going to starve himself because of fraud. Totes. He's a martyr for the cause.

I believe in his 'hunger strike' about as much as his son's 'security team.'


He probably went on a diet and shaved his head.
 
2022-05-17 4:49:23 PM  
'Celebrated lobbyist'.

Who the fark celebrates any lobbyists?
 
2022-05-17 4:49:47 PM  
"saddest event in Washington in 2022"

Yeah, but not how you think it's sad.
 
2022-05-17 4:49:53 PM  
LOL
 
2022-05-17 4:51:07 PM  

Jesterling: [Fark user image 254x132]


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 4:51:10 PM  
Meh. Die. I don't care anymore.
 
2022-05-17 4:51:30 PM  
Prediction: he will show up in deliberately oversized clothes and a bald cap.
 
2022-05-17 4:54:41 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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2022-05-17 4:54:59 PM  
65 pounds in 30 days?  Even for a hunger strike that seems like a lot. What are the odds he had COVID, spent 30 days on a ventilator and just doesn't want to admit it?


Dimensio: Prediction: he will show up in deliberately oversized clothes and a bald cap.


With his fly down
 
2022-05-17 4:55:39 PM  
He lost 65 pounds? Trump should try that. Twice.
 
2022-05-17 4:56:39 PM  

Alphax: 'Celebrated lobbyist'.

Who the fark celebrates any lobbyists?


The politicians they bribe.
 
2022-05-17 4:56:48 PM  

hubiestubert: Sure, he's totally going to starve himself because of fraud. Totes. He's a martyr for the cause.

I believe in his 'hunger strike' about as much as his son's 'security team.'


Another possibility -- he got cancer and chemo has rendered him looking exactly what they're describing.  Maybe they're doing this to attempt to crowdfund his treatment without acknowledging that his healthcare coverage (if he had it) still leaves him with sizeable bills.  Basically use his appearance to grift instead of starting a medical gofundme like a normal American.
 
2022-05-17 4:57:06 PM  
Is his zipper still down?
 
2022-05-17 4:57:56 PM  

hubiestubert: Sure, he's totally going to starve himself because of fraud. Totes. He's a martyr for the cause.

I believe in his 'hunger strike' about as much as his son's 'security team.'


The justice Burckman is seeking is that he not be punished for crimes that he did, repeatedly and unrepentantly, to dissuade marginalized people from voting with lies.

Somehow Gandhi's hunger strike to persuade Hindus and Muslims to stop killing each other... Seems different, somehow.
 
2022-05-17 4:58:22 PM  

vrax: Lost ALL his hair?  Yeah, no.  What he's done is shave his head and plop his fed ass in a wheelchair because he's part of a drama queen duo.


Beat me to it by 9 minutes!
 
2022-05-17 4:59:21 PM  
Hard pass.
 
2022-05-17 4:59:43 PM  
A giant of a man? He's down to 147, ya moopers. With any amount of luck he will be the incredible shrinking deceased man if he follows his doctors orders.

Fark user image
 
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