Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Popular Science)   How dry is out in the American West right now? To put it into perspective, the last time it was this dry, Charlemagne was crowned Emperor, algebra had just been invented, and Danish Vikings sacked London   (popsci.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Drought, Reservoir, Climate change and agriculture, Hydrology, Precipitation, Meteorology, Soil, California  
•       •       •

2126 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2022 at 8:21 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



137 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2022-05-17 7:49:55 AM  
I would have gone for a Ben Shapiro's wife joke.
 
2022-05-17 8:22:00 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


It farking SAAAAAAND!
 
2022-05-17 8:28:27 AM  

SpectroBoy: [Fark user image 850x478]

It farking SAAAAAAND!


That was an unfair characterization on his part.  The people who were starving lived in the Ethiopian and Eritrean highlands where they had been feeding themselves for thousands of years before a war pushed all of them into refugee camps in Sudan.  They weren't stupid.  They were victims of a war.
 
2022-05-17 8:30:19 AM  
Good thing global warming isn't real. Otherwise I'd be worried about this.

/s
 
2022-05-17 8:30:24 AM  
Algebra was always there. You just happened to come across it.
 
2022-05-17 8:31:15 AM  
My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?
 
2022-05-17 8:33:41 AM  
Books on one shelf, a small collection of old titles. Isak Dinesen, bound in leather. Alice in Wonderland, in an old illustrated edition. The kind of things someone kept to show visitors how smart they were. Accessories to identity. But one book-a copy of Cadillac Desert, old. He reached for it. "Don't," she said. "It's a signed first." Angel smirked. "'Course it is." Then: "My boss makes all her new hires read that. She likes us to see this mess isn't an accident. We were headed straight to Hell, and didn't do anything about it.
Paolo Bacigalupi, The Water Knife
 
2022-05-17 8:34:17 AM  

kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?


Can you drive across USA in 10 hours?

What does he have against Appalachia?
 
2022-05-17 8:34:56 AM  
So uh...how is this going to shake out? An exodus will become needed at some point.
 
2022-05-17 8:35:28 AM  

kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?


I was under the impression that Eastern Oregon and Eastern Washington are places you want to move away from, and not to.  I read Sherman Alexie's "Reservation Blues" about 20 years ago and the entire drive of everyone in the book was to get the hell out of Eastern Washington and never come back.
 
2022-05-17 8:35:41 AM  
So water runs out, people's homes are worth nothing, banks will collapse again.

People move to where water is, but there's not enough housing, not that most could afford it anymore.

We should start on projects to move people out and find creative ways to get water before it gets bad, but we won't.

/interesting times ahead
 
2022-05-17 8:37:10 AM  
I have some friends that see the writing on the wall and are selling their property out west and heading back east. One of them is a firefighter and has spent the last few years almost exclusively fighting wildfires and is tired of it.
 
2022-05-17 8:37:52 AM  
It better rain before someone invents algebra again or my kids will be pissed.
 
2022-05-17 8:39:36 AM  

Ketchuponsteak: kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?

Can you drive across USA in 10 hours?

What does he have against Appalachia?


Apparently he likes things neat... real methy there....
 
2022-05-17 8:42:30 AM  
Hey, Julie.  Al;'s-yer-bra?  heh heh.  Al's yer bra?

So, this happened before?  Good.  I was almost buying it to that global warming crap.  Well, that huge pile of used tires won't accidentally catch fire and burn by itself.  Off to work.
 
2022-05-17 8:43:41 AM  

Rapmaster2000: kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?

I was under the impression that Eastern Oregon and Eastern Washington are places you want to move away from, and not to.  I read Sherman Alexie's "Reservation Blues" about 20 years ago and the entire drive of everyone in the book was to get the hell out of Eastern Washington and never come back.



Let's just say: certain people (like say...me) GTFO ASAP. But other certain people feel more...welcome there. It's..."monochromatic" and "those people" aren't there. Whomever your "those people" are, they certainly are not there, unless you mean small town white people.
That's all that's there. And high-desert scrub brush. "Itchy, scratchy, and dirty." That describes the whole place.
 
2022-05-17 8:45:14 AM  
In the 30s and 40s, that area was called 'the dust bowl'...  btdt....
 
2022-05-17 8:53:29 AM  

Free Range Fetus Farmer: So water runs out, people's homes are worth nothing, banks will collapse again.

People move to where water is, but there's not enough housing, not that most could afford it anymore.

We should start on projects to move people out and find creative ways to get water before it gets bad, but we won't.

/interesting times ahead


The haves will have their water trucked in, at exceptional cost -- see what happened in South Africa last year or the year before when the reservoirs in Durban (?) ran dry.  The have nots will lose their properties because they're worthless and they can't sustain living on them.  You will see large scale migration, but shifted toward the lower end of the socioeconomic scale, which will create pressures on public resources in the places they go.

Best case, it's a slow-moving individual tragedy.  Worst case, it happens fast and there's violence, of the old-school grab pitchforks and torches and go take what the rich people have variety.
 
2022-05-17 8:53:56 AM  
We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.
 
2022-05-17 8:55:35 AM  

Algebrat: Algebra was always there. You just happened to come across it.


I was amused, too. Because the word "algebra" comes from Arabic, there is a myth that it was invented by Muslims. It doesn't work that way. It was certainly around long before Islam. The Pythagorean theorem is algebra, and was known to the ancient Chinese and Babylonians, although it is named after a Greek who lived much later.
 
2022-05-17 8:56:17 AM  
And there were climate change/science deniers even then.
thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size


"MAGA..."
 
2022-05-17 8:56:23 AM  

OlderGuy: In the 30s and 40s, that area was called 'the dust bowl'...  btdt....


Yeah, I was watching farmland blow away in the wind on a news show this weekend and that's the first thing that came to mind.
 
2022-05-17 8:56:25 AM  

OlderGuy: Ketchuponsteak: kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?

Can you drive across USA in 10 hours?

What does he have against Appalachia?

Apparently he likes things neat... real methy there....


If that's what he's after, he should just go to the Ozarks.  You can probably find 20 acres there for $100,000 and there will be lots of water.

A few years ago I went camping in Big South Fork National Recreation Area which is in north central Tennessee on the border of Kentucky.  That's one of the more rural places I've been to east of the Mississippi.  I would bet you could get the same deal there.

Or Minnesota somewhere around and north of Bemidji.  Or Southern Alabama.  Or any place in Florida between Panama City and Gainesville.   There's plenty of empty places in the east, all with lots of water.  Mobile, AL is the rainiest city in the US.
 
2022-05-17 8:57:19 AM  
I guess the air is too dry for these to work:

Fark user imageView Full Size


I know a guy named Owen that can send us some. I haven't heard from him in a while though, I hope he's ok....
 
2022-05-17 9:01:47 AM  

OlderGuy: In the 30s and 40s, that area was called 'the dust bowl'...  btdt....


People in the Dust Bowl left to go to...

California.
 
2022-05-17 9:03:03 AM  

Ketchuponsteak: Can you drive across USA in 10 hours?


No, but automatically assuming that someone will just spend almost every weekend all year driving all over the PNW for is unreasonable, not even offering gas money in exchange.

What does he have against Appalachia?

He doesn't want any neighbors nearby, and no chance of land nearby being bought up and developed.  Ten mostly wooded acres isn't enough space when you're surrounded by Amish, apparently.  Trespassing, leaving junk around on their properties, speeding around curves in the middle of dirt roads (nearly hitting cars), over-tapping the maple trees (using bleach containers)...

Of course, he's dreaming if he wants something in the Pacific Northwest:
-with water
-some trees
-not at risk of wildfire
-minimum 20 acres
-at least 2 hours from a city
-under $100k

Eastern OR/southeast WA in particular won't have that.  He doesn't seem too keen on MT for whatever reason (too close to us?)
 
2022-05-17 9:05:09 AM  

Harry Freakstorm: Hey, Julie.  Al;'s-yer-bra?  heh heh.  Al's yer bra?

So, this happened before?  Good.  I was almost buying it to that global warming crap.  Well, that huge pile of used tires won't accidentally catch fire and burn by itself.  Off to work.


Oh that tire fire is featured in the group "W" chat thread today
 
2022-05-17 9:06:26 AM  

flucto: We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.


How about actually burning the dickwads that charge an arm and a leg for a "new edition" of an algebra text book?
The math hasn't changed.
Ever.
 
2022-05-17 9:07:04 AM  

flucto: We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.


I use algebra every time I need to cut a recipe in half.  It works.
 
2022-05-17 9:11:58 AM  

Free Range Fetus Farmer: So water runs out, people's homes are worth nothing, banks will collapse again.

People move to where water is, but there's not enough housing, not that most could afford it anymore.

We should start on projects to move people out and find creative ways to get water before it gets bad, but we won't.

/interesting times ahead


Yeah, the time to flee the drought is now.
There will be a sudden tipping point where your house there won't be worth squat.
 
2022-05-17 9:19:10 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

/ducks
 
2022-05-17 9:20:18 AM  

Rapmaster2000: OlderGuy: Ketchuponsteak: kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?

Can you drive across USA in 10 hours?

What does he have against Appalachia?

Apparently he likes things neat... real methy there....

If that's what he's after, he should just go to the Ozarks.  You can probably find 20 acres there for $100,000 and there will be lots of water.

A few years ago I went camping in Big South Fork National Recreation Area which is in north central Tennessee on the border of Kentucky.  That's one of the more rural places I've been to east of the Mississippi.  I would bet you could get the same deal there.

Or Minnesota somewhere around and north of Bemidji.  Or Southern Alabama.  Or any place in Florida between Panama City and Gainesville.   There's plenty of empty places in the east, all with lots of water.  Mobile, AL is the rainiest city in the US.


I've read a few predictions that, once global warming really gets its teeth into us in a few decades or so, the Rust Belt will the place to be.  Particularly the lower Great Lakes - the stretch from Rochester to Cleveland is maybe the only part of the US where the climate might substantially improve.

/Considering the winters, that's not saying much
 
2022-05-17 9:21:15 AM  
You need more guns and less government. That would fix it amirite?
 
2022-05-17 9:24:59 AM  

vudukungfu: flucto: We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.

How about actually burning the dickwads that charge an arm and a leg for a "new edition" of an algebra text book?
The math hasn't changed.
Ever.


If only there was a medium available where we could publish stuff electronically rather than chopping down millions of trees every time they move a comma on one page. Oh well.
 
2022-05-17 9:26:32 AM  

Free Range Fetus Farmer: So water runs out, people's homes are worth nothing, banks will collapse again.

People move to where water is, but there's not enough housing, not that most could afford it anymore.

We should start on projects to move people out and find creative ways to get water before it gets bad, but we won't.

/interesting times ahead


But Jesus!
 
2022-05-17 9:26:33 AM  

kittyhas1000legs: My know-it-all, better-than-you, butthole brother-in-law is planning on moving from upstate NY, because a bunch of the land on his road may soon be sold to developers (or the Amish if they can all pool their money together) and he just can't have that.  He's looking at eastern OR because that's obviously superior.  It just has to be 20+ acres, not too close to a city, not too wooded, not a big dirt patch, have water, and be under $100k.  Farking delusional.

/also expects us to drive 10 hours each way to look at properties he likes
//did i mention he's delusional?


Ha!   Show him this:

https://www.landwatch.com/lake-county-oregon-recreational-property-for-sale/pid/411463670
 
2022-05-17 9:28:50 AM  

vudukungfu: flucto: We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.

How about actually burning the dickwads that charge an arm and a leg for a "new edition" of an algebra text book?
The math hasn't changed.
Ever.


Yeah but they had to print new books with no CRT in 'em.
 
2022-05-17 9:29:01 AM  

WastrelWay: Because the word "algebra" comes from Arabic, there is a myth that it was invented by Muslims.


In 820 AD, Arabic scholar al-Khwarizmi set forth the branch of Alegebra. Al Khwarizmi derived his works from Hindu works as well as other earlier works. [source]
 
2022-05-17 9:29:40 AM  

erewhon the opinionated: You need more guns and less government. That would fix it amirite?


Maybe, as long as you cut rich people's taxes at the same time.
 
2022-05-17 9:35:40 AM  
How dry is out in the American West right now? To put it into perspective, the last time it was this dry, Charlemagne was crowned Emperor, algebra had just been invented, and Danish Vikings sacked London

Does this mean that we ought to sack London?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-17 9:37:20 AM  
Yes, but oil company profits are up, and isn't that the important nthing?
 
2022-05-17 9:37:38 AM  
Was this headline supposed to be read in Dennis Miller's voice? Because that's how it happened in my brain, and then the voice blamed woke liberal activists for the problem. Gonna shove a q-tip in there until it stops.
 
2022-05-17 9:40:25 AM  
This is the sort of drought that can end empires and redraw maps.
 
2022-05-17 9:40:41 AM  

erewhon the opinionated: You need more guns and less government. That would fix it amirite?


You forgot lower taxes.
 
2022-05-17 9:44:29 AM  
We're about to find out what happens to a city like  Las Vegas once all the water runs out.
Should give future archaeologists something to ponder.
 
2022-05-17 9:44:40 AM  

SpectroBoy: [Fark user image image 850x478]

It farking SAAAAAAND!


fark the pos. He is what American ignorance is.
 
2022-05-17 9:46:11 AM  

SuperSeriousMan: WastrelWay: Because the word "algebra" comes from Arabic, there is a myth that it was invented by Muslims.

In 820 AD, Arabic scholar al-Khwarizmi set forth the branch of Alegebra. Al Khwarizmi derived his works from Hindu works as well as other earlier works. [source]


And there it is, one statement of the myth. Whoever wrote that never heard of Diophantus or anyone else who used algebra hundreds or thousands of years before. How did the Romans build their arched aqueducts, by trial and error, since algebra hadn't been invented? (Actually, the math involved in Roman engineering must have been on the level of what we today call "pre-calculus" since calculus hadn't been invented....  and they did it all with Roman numerals, right.... )
 
2022-05-17 9:49:55 AM  
The day we bring fossil fuel companies and other major polluters to The Hague for crimes against humanity, is the day actual meaningful change will begin. But, we all know that day will never come

Breathable air, drinkable water and survivable temperatures are not a human right. But profits sure are
 
2022-05-17 9:50:47 AM  

WastrelWay: And there it is, one statement of the myth.


We understand how hard it is for some people to give any credit to Muslims, but while the concepts behind algebra were indeed worked out by ancient cultures, it was indeed the Persian Muhammad ibn Musa al-Khwarizmi who laid down the hard concepts in his book "The Science of Restoring and Balancing". [source]
 
2022-05-17 9:51:01 AM  

flucto: vudukungfu: flucto: We should have a national day where we burn effigies of the dickwad who invented algebra.

How about actually burning the dickwads that charge an arm and a leg for a "new edition" of an algebra text book?
The math hasn't changed.
Ever.

If only there was a medium available where we could publish stuff electronically rather than chopping down millions of trees every time they move a comma on one page. Oh well.


Why hasn't at least junk mail been made wireless? Jfc
 
Displayed 50 of 137 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.