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(US News)   Kremlin: they're our spies, US. You can't have them. не ваш   (usnews.com) divider line
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4070 clicks; posted to Politics » on 16 May 2022 at 3:05 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



45 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-05-16 8:49:01 AM  
Every accusation a confession.
 
2022-05-16 9:39:25 AM  
"If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.
 
2022-05-16 10:51:11 AM  

hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.


And you get a weekly potato, whether you need it or not!  2 potatoes on birthday!!
 
2022-05-16 1:58:59 PM  

hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.


Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...
 
2022-05-16 3:06:25 PM  

hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.


Because in America there is no retirement package!
 
2022-05-16 3:08:19 PM  

beezeltown: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...


Is not polonium - can not afford; is now potato as well.
 
2022-05-16 3:08:23 PM  
Sorry, not sorry.
 
MFK
2022-05-16 3:08:59 PM  
Turnabout is fair play
 
2022-05-16 3:10:12 PM  
Pinkpolo Von Mantits and wife Karen Cankles, attorneys at law! I had forgotten about them.
 
2022-05-16 3:11:56 PM  
Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.
 
2022-05-16 3:12:00 PM  
LOL, how'd that post end up in Russia?
 
2022-05-16 3:12:39 PM  
We don't need them.  The US knew you were invading months before you actually did invade because the FSB is filled with worms.  You created a kleptocracy, Vlad.  Of course your underlings are going to sell whatever they can for their own personal gain.
 
2022-05-16 3:13:52 PM  

Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.


Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."
 
2022-05-16 3:14:19 PM  
"Come work for us.  You can use our currency for more than toilet paper or heating fuel"
 
2022-05-16 3:14:42 PM  

someonelse: Pinkpolo Von Mantits and wife Karen Cankles, attorneys at law! I had forgotten about them.


"How was I to know/They were with the Russians too?"
 
2022-05-16 3:15:37 PM  

beezeltown: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...


They used polonium to send a message that it was them. They could have had him die mysteriously, polonium made sure that everyone knew it was them, especially the people that were considering betraying them. It's the same reason that they used a Russian nerve agent in the UK.
 
2022-05-16 3:15:43 PM  

beezeltown: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...


Really?  The Kola peninsula is lousy with radioactive material just laying around.
 
2022-05-16 3:16:57 PM  
Only we can do that to our pledges
Youtube UVgbFttx-6I
 
2022-05-16 3:18:53 PM  

beezeltown: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-16 3:19:03 PM  
This is why Klingons invented the potato gun.
 
2022-05-16 3:21:28 PM  
Well, we consider a genocidal war against a neighboring country unacceptable.
Perhaps if you stop, we'll stop.
 
2022-05-16 3:21:42 PM  
They are not being actively recruited.  They've entered the transfer portal and are fair game.
 
2022-05-16 3:34:28 PM  
Putin now has to assume, whether they turned or not, that they're all double agents.  I'm glad the scoundrels of this decade have largely been idiots.
 
2022-05-16 3:42:27 PM  
Agents working in DC get to see the West and what's really going on in Ukraine and Moscow, so I wouldn't think it would be hard to turn one of those guys.  Which is why all of them probably have well-loved hostages at home.
 
2022-05-16 3:46:51 PM  

Erek the Red: beezeltown: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Hey, Polonium is extremely expensive...

Really?  The Kola peninsula is lousy with radioactive material just laying around.


Polonium 210 has a half-life of 138 days. You really need it fresh.
 
2022-05-16 3:46:54 PM  
Every government is always trying to turn the spies and embassy staff into spies for themselves.

The Russians bringing it up like that suggests to me that our outreach is particularly concerning them, and we should redouble our efforts. Sounds like there might be some folks on the Russian side who might be buying our sales pitch these days. Gee, wonder why that could be?
 
2022-05-16 3:48:34 PM  

Rapmaster2000: Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.

Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."


Anyone remember "Ukraine is an American puppet state, therefore the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine (which they're totally not going to do and the very idea that they will is just American agitprop)"?
 
2022-05-16 3:49:59 PM  

BigMax: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

And you get a weekly potato, whether you need it or not!  2 potatoes on birthday!!


Farmer greets Vladimir Putin at his Potato Farm and says: "Comrade Putin, we have so many potatoes that, piled one on top of the other, they would reach all the way to God." Putin replies: "God doesn't exist." The farmer then says: "Exactly. Neither do the potatoes."

Updated
 
2022-05-16 3:54:24 PM  

mongbiohazard: Every government is always trying to turn the spies and embassy staff into spies for themselves.

The Russians bringing it up like that suggests to me that our outreach is particularly concerning them, and we should redouble our efforts. Sounds like there might be some folks on the Russian side who might be buying our sales pitch these days. Gee, wonder why that could be?


The Russians have done a pretty good job recruiting spies here in the US too. Of course, most of them tend to be Nazis, like Wendy Rogers and Stew Peters.

But that certainly isn't due to an affinity between Nazis and modern Russia.
 
2022-05-16 3:56:25 PM  

HeartBurnKid: Rapmaster2000: Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.

Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."

Anyone remember "Ukraine is an American puppet state, therefore the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine (which they're totally not going to do and the very idea that they will is just American agitprop)"?


There was one Farker who would not stop talking about how everyone is falling for "The Narrative" and that Biden and the media was playing us all like fiddles or something and there would never be an invasion by Russia.

I won't name names, but I haven't seen that account since.
 
2022-05-16 4:00:09 PM  
They're spies like us.
 
2022-05-16 4:01:31 PM  

Rapmaster2000: HeartBurnKid: Rapmaster2000: Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.

Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."

Anyone remember "Ukraine is an American puppet state, therefore the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine (which they're totally not going to do and the very idea that they will is just American agitprop)"?

There was one Farker who would not stop talking about how everyone is falling for "The Narrative" and that Biden and the media was playing us all like fiddles or something and there would never be an invasion by Russia.

I won't name names, but I haven't seen that account since.


That dude is literally still everywhere, gaslighting on behalf of Russia.

Although I haven't seen him since Saturday...
 
2022-05-16 4:03:31 PM  

Cokezeroinacan: Rapmaster2000: HeartBurnKid: Rapmaster2000: Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.

Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."

Anyone remember "Ukraine is an American puppet state, therefore the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine (which they're totally not going to do and the very idea that they will is just American agitprop)"?

There was one Farker who would not stop talking about how everyone is falling for "The Narrative" and that Biden and the media was playing us all like fiddles or something and there would never be an invasion by Russia.

I won't name names, but I haven't seen that account since.

That dude is literally still everywhere, gaslighting on behalf of Russia.

Although I haven't seen him since Saturday...


I know of who you speak, but this was a different guy.

That guy primarily says the same thing every single time which is an iteration of "It's everyone else's job to solve this problem except for Vladimir Putin.  He cannot be held responsible for anything that he does."
 
2022-05-16 4:06:19 PM  
Hey Rushy,  NOCGFY
 
2022-05-16 4:07:04 PM  

Urmuf Hamer: Every accusation a confession.


Every meal is a banquet, every paycheck a fortune, every formation a parade. I LOVE the corps!
 
2022-05-16 4:18:41 PM  

Rapmaster2000: HeartBurnKid: Rapmaster2000: Gyro the Greek Sandwich Pirate: Agitprop for idiots. Anyone who knows anything about international espionage is just rolling their eyes.

Unfortunately, there are a ton of idiots, so this is kind of a depressing reminder.

Prepare for "America recruits spies.  Therefore, the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine."

Anyone remember "Ukraine is an American puppet state, therefore the Russians are justified in invading Ukraine (which they're totally not going to do and the very idea that they will is just American agitprop)"?

There was one Farker who would not stop talking about how everyone is falling for "The Narrative" and that Biden and the media was playing us all like fiddles or something and there would never be an invasion by Russia.

I won't name names, but I haven't seen that account since.


Probably put that alt in deep storage or changed the name (if that is even possible)
 
2022-05-16 4:19:20 PM  

Karma Chameleon: hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.

Because in America there is no retirement package!


especially if you spy in china for the US,
 
2022-05-16 4:23:07 PM  
Even if he accomplished nothing else, Biden would be a success for letting Russia and Saudi Arabia know that we know they're our enemies. It's been far too long since that happened.
 
2022-05-16 4:23:24 PM  
Leave them alone FBI, they already have jobs at the NRA
 
2022-05-16 4:23:55 PM  

hubiestubert: "If you work for us, you wouldn't have to expect a polonium retirement package."

It's a compelling argument.


Except the odds are fairly high that Putin will want to throw a polonium party for those "defectors" regardless -- more so, even.
 
2022-05-16 4:25:43 PM  

Rapmaster2000: That guy primarily says the same thing every single time which is an iteration of "It's everyone else's job to solve this problem except for Vladimir Putin.  He cannot be held responsible for anything that he does."


Par for the course for (wannabe) dictators.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-16 4:29:53 PM  
ваш

Funny how that looks a lot like the word "bawwww" in our language.
 
2022-05-16 4:57:18 PM  
In the Russian's defense, the GRU's healthcare package has no deductibles and is a lot more comprehensive than the Fed's.  The downside: is potato.
 
2022-05-16 6:23:42 PM  
не ваши
 
2022-05-16 11:13:55 PM  
Didn't the Russians essentially make hunting US state department staff at the embassy in Moscow a sport or something? I seem to remember a couple of news reports about that. Turnabout is a biatch, Russia.
 
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