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(The Smoking Gun)   Cops: Woman dumped bucket of urine on neighbor because his chicken was pooping on her back patio at Florida mobile home park   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Mobile home, Christine Terman, Crime, arrest report, Sheriff, Victim, Arrest, Travel trailer  
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2269 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 May 2022 at 2:35 PM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-05-10 2:12:47 PM  
John Cale - Chicken Shit - 1977
Youtube z0KeJ4KBUNo
 
2022-05-10 2:37:07 PM  
... is the single most Florida thing I've read in quite time.

Bravo, Subby.

This is the part where I don't ask why she had an entire bucketful of urine at the ready.
 
2022-05-10 2:37:46 PM  
It's a chicken.

A chicken.
 
2022-05-10 2:39:08 PM  
And it wasn't even her urine, she stole it from her another neighbor.
 
2022-05-10 2:40:21 PM  

xxBirdMadGirlxx: ... is the single most Florida thing I've read in quite time.

Bravo, Subby.

This is the part where I don't ask why she had an entire bucketful of urine at the ready.


It's called a Gazunda.

Jug gazunda the bed so you can pee in the night without leaving the room...
 
2022-05-10 2:40:47 PM  

xxBirdMadGirlxx: ... is the single most Florida thing I've read in quite time.

Bravo, Subby.

This is the part where I don't ask why she had an entire bucketful of urine at the ready.


We just call that "the Florida bucket".
 
2022-05-10 2:41:23 PM  
She saving it to sell?
 
2022-05-10 2:41:47 PM  
Oblig.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 2:42:39 PM  
Angered that a neighbor's chicken had been "pooping on the back patio," a Florida Woman allegedly retrieved "a bucket of pee from her bathroom" and proceeded to douse the bird's owner with the foul liquid, according to an arrest report.


I wonder if the trial will include a discussion of whether the alleged assailant also had a functioning toilet system, indicating that this assault was planned enough in advance for her to collect a bucket of pee to use OR that the bucket of pee was incidental and simply a side effect of her not emptying her chamber bucket after use.

How much volume is a "bucket" anyhow?  Like, I can pee once into a bucket, but it won't be anywhere near full.  Can we really still call that a "bucket of pee"? I assume input/output is fairly balanced for a healthy person, so you're peeing ~1-2L a day, maybe less if you don't drink a lot.  A 3 gallon bucket seems like a fairly standard size bucket you'd get at a hardware store, so did she save up her pee for a week or more to achieve a mostly full bucket of pee?

This is some quality Florida action.
 
2022-05-10 2:43:18 PM  
No one just has a bucket of pee laying around.

This was a premeditated piss assault.
 
2022-05-10 2:44:07 PM  
In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.
 
2022-05-10 2:44:44 PM  
That's a finger lickin' assault charge.
 
2022-05-10 2:44:47 PM  
Stay Classy, Fler'da
 
2022-05-10 2:44:51 PM  

Mr. Fuzzypaws: She saving it to sell?


Yeah, urine for a great deal!
 
2022-05-10 2:45:12 PM  
Band of Brothers - Ep.5 - Crossroads - "It's my own piss for Chrissake!".avi
Youtube 7EgL77rv9bg
 
2022-05-10 2:45:14 PM  
Should've called Mr. Lahey and Randers
 
2022-05-10 2:46:16 PM  

Tom-Servo: In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.


thesmokinggun.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 2:46:34 PM  
On second thought let's not go to Florida, 'tis a silly place.
 
2022-05-10 2:59:16 PM  
you gotta give her some credit for managing to fill up a nice bukket of piss
 
2022-05-10 3:04:31 PM  
Bugs Bunny vs the state of Florida
Youtube UGP8wOjdtzA
 
2022-05-10 3:06:26 PM  

New Rising Sun: Tom-Servo: In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.

[thesmokinggun.com image 250x313]


I clicked the link saw the picture and immediately became Jason Bateman, "I don't know what I expected."
 
2022-05-10 3:11:10 PM  

Sorelian's Ghost: New Rising Sun: Tom-Servo: In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.

[thesmokinggun.com image 250x313]

I clicked the link saw the picture and immediately became Jason Bateman, "I don't know what I expected."


I'm sure there are hot chicks out there somewhere willing or wanting to drop buckets of pee on you.  I'm torn as to whether Florida is the first or last place you should start that search.
 
2022-05-10 3:14:39 PM  

New Rising Sun: Tom-Servo: In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.

[thesmokinggun.com image 250x313]


this is what most floridians look like w/o makeup
 
2022-05-10 3:17:32 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 3:18:34 PM  
I feel like I'm in the minority feeling she was justified. If you're animal keeps shiatting on my stuff, I'm gonna need you to clean up after it.
 
2022-05-10 3:18:59 PM  
I can relate.  My neighbor has a few chickens.  They used to come to front porch and shiat all over the window ledge and outdoor furniture.

I didn't have a bucket of urine handy, so I learned about "bird spikes".

I haven't had a chicken in my yard since installing the spikes.
 
2022-05-10 3:24:20 PM  
Understandable. Chicken shiat is nasty.

As to the pee bucket, well, so are trailer homes in Florida.
 
2022-05-10 3:24:49 PM  
The arrest report does not indicate why Terman had a bucket of waste at the ready.

Well just look at her
 
2022-05-10 3:25:18 PM  

Fat Dave: I can relate.  My neighbor has a few chickens.  They used to come to front porch and shiat all over the window ledge and outdoor furniture.

I didn't have a bucket of urine handy, so I learned about "bird spikes".

I haven't had a chicken in my yard since installing the spikes.


My neighbor's neighbor has about 8 chickens. They never come over to my yard though....there is a pit bull they would need to pass (but she's super sweet and trained to not go after chickens,I have other friends that have chickens, and once the dog started to go after a chicken and the owner of the second set of chickens set the dog straight) and I used to have a kitty.

The chickens have been known to cross the street and hang out at the gas station and the town green and the church.

My girlfriend's dad's girlfriend also has chickens.

I do get all the free eggs I want though, so I got that going for me, which is nice.

A few roads away there is this dumb farking rooster that likes to click at the full moon and it can be kind of annoying in the summertime when the windows are open, but that's life in rural Vermont.
 
2022-05-10 3:28:17 PM  
thesmokinggun.comView Full Size


I definitely would have thought she didn't have a pot to piss in.
 
2022-05-10 3:28:49 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 3:37:38 PM  
Wait.  That's a crime?  In Florida?  What happened to freedom?
 
2022-05-10 3:39:12 PM  
Why not, "eh, free chicken," ten easy (messy steps), chicken dinner.

Then shiat on the neighbor's lawn overnight to return their property.
 
2022-05-10 3:40:36 PM  

maniacbastard: No one just has a bucket of pee laying around.

This was a premeditated piss assault.


Not just pissault, but bladdery.
 
2022-05-10 3:41:55 PM  
Sounds like two of Colonel's secret ingredients have been revealed.

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 3:43:52 PM  

maniacbastard: No one just has a bucket of pee laying around.

This was a premeditated piss assault.


Maybe she tans hides as a hobby? Don't ask about the bucket o' brains
 
2022-05-10 3:44:48 PM  
They still use chamber pots in Florida? Indoor plumbing a communist plot to steal Floridians vital essence?
 
2022-05-10 3:49:23 PM  
These country-western songs just write themselves.
 
2022-05-10 3:50:08 PM  
I wish somebody gave me a golden shower.

Fark user imageView Full Size


I was impressed that she had the fortitude to actually fill a bucket, and I'm thinking a 3 gallon bucket, with piss. Then the article said she had a boyfriend, so he probably helped fill it up. Which is cheating in my opinion.

But at least she found someone who was willing to fill up a piss bucket with her, and threaten the neighbor in front of police. There's someone out there for everyone, and it's truly a love story for the ages. With piss.
 
2022-05-10 3:57:24 PM  
The James Brown Band - The Chicken
Youtube L2wYzU3XKqY
 
2022-05-10 3:58:39 PM  

beezeltown: Why not, "eh, free chicken," ten easy (messy steps), chicken dinner.

Then shiat on the neighbor's lawn overnight to return their property.


Solomon!
 
2022-05-10 4:02:45 PM  

Tom-Servo: In her defense, chicken shiat is some of the worst smelling shiat imaginable.

Also, was it her own urine, and where does she land on the hot/crazy chart?  Asking for a friend.


Right? I mean she's not wrong!
 
2022-05-10 4:04:03 PM  
I reckon that that trailer park isn't much of a Haven after all!
 
2022-05-10 4:14:20 PM  
Have these people never heard of shoot, shovel and shut up? If yer not the shootin kind then try one of these:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-05-10 4:22:16 PM  

LarrySouth: xxBirdMadGirlxx: ... is the single most Florida thing I've read in quite time.

Bravo, Subby.

This is the part where I don't ask why she had an entire bucketful of urine at the ready.

It's called a Gazunda.

Jug gazunda the bed so you can pee in the night without leaving the room...


Thanks, Granny Weatherwax.
 
2022-05-10 4:24:57 PM  
Neighbors are walking around outside then pooping in other neighbors back yards? Instead of simply staying home and pooping into the home throne? Some save their urine in open buckets just in case they need fast access to it when attempting to douse quick children.

And the cops were called?

Are we sure this was a case of coincidental non-consensual attacks with septic human waste rather  than a freaky (and honestly probably German) group of pee and poo fetishists who assumed guidelines and limits of acceptable behavior rather than discussing them in advance of their event?
 
2022-05-10 4:29:22 PM  

Vern: I wish somebody gave me a golden shower.

[Fark user image image 400x230]

I was impressed that she had the fortitude to actually fill a bucket, and I'm thinking a 3 gallon bucket, with piss. Then the article said she had a boyfriend, so he probably helped fill it up. Which is cheating in my opinion.

But at least she found someone who was willing to fill up a piss bucket with her, and threaten the neighbor in front of police. There's someone out there for everyone, and it's truly a love story for the ages. With piss.


Sounds like the crime was premeditated. She should have received a harsher penalty.
 
2022-05-10 4:30:37 PM  
I read that headline, and all I could think was "The Aristocrats!"
 
2022-05-10 4:34:33 PM  

ar393: ...

The chickens have been known to cross the street and hang out at the gas station and the town green and the church.

...


Why did the chickens cross the street?
To hang out at the gas station and go to church.
 
2022-05-10 4:44:02 PM  
Rich people have a canopy over their bed.

Poor people dumb a can of pee over your head.
 
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