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(Axios)   Staff retreats are about to get real stupid   (axios.com) divider line
    More: PSA, Virtual reality, slew of big companies, future of company, virtual reality headsets, different continents, new employees, Metaverse, America's corporate event market  
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1336 clicks; posted to Business » on 29 Apr 2022 at 7:45 AM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



26 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2022-04-29 8:24:18 AM  
They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.
 
2022-04-29 8:24:54 AM  

Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.


That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.
 
2022-04-29 8:32:20 AM  
Why meta? At least go VRchat
Greatest VR Chat Avatar Ever - Exterminauts (fixed ending)
Youtube 5TdWPpHkrzo
 
2022-04-29 9:02:48 AM  
I haven't been to one top golf or escape room. I'm sure not doing this. The best way to escape a room is not get in it.
 
2022-04-29 9:07:32 AM  
I'm glad I don't work in an office anymore.
 
2022-04-29 9:15:07 AM  
My wife's boss set one up for her team. It consisted of sending out a box of food, and having a chef talk everybody through making a gourmet meal with it. Everyone wore chef's hats and took their laptops to the kitchen to cook.
It was pretty goofy, but honestly, it's probably a clever way of doing a virtual team building exercise.
I'd be all in for a virtual wine, whiskey, or beer tasting team building exercise.
 
2022-04-29 9:20:06 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.

That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.


I worked in Silicon Valley during the boom and never got any free drinks. But, I was working for real companies, not cash-burners. Remember "burn rate"?
 
2022-04-29 9:24:16 AM  

natazha: Rapmaster2000: Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.

That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.

I worked in Silicon Valley during the boom and never got any free drinks. But, I was working for real companies, not cash-burners. Remember "burn rate"?


I worked in the Midwest for Motorola and then in the Southeast for a long defunct telecom firm.  We all got booze, bowling, free lunches, etc.  Moto was especially great.  We had a campus even.

A friend of mine worked at Radiant Systems and they had a beer cart in the office every Friday afternoon.

The telecom firm had office beers until just before I joined because an intern crashed his car and his parents sued the company, so no more beer.  I hate people who can't handle their drugs.
 
2022-04-29 9:27:39 AM  

Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.


I actually read that last word as "pantless".... I believe both words work.
 
2022-04-29 9:30:51 AM  
The only upside of a staff retreat was if they did it somewhere nice. If it's virtual, you don't even get that.
 
2022-04-29 9:58:43 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.

That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.


My wife's on the board of our local United Way, along with a lady who has a fancy-baked-goods company. During the pandemic, when they were having virtual retreats, that lady or someone sent by her would drive around and leave a bag of goodies on each board member's doorstep.

It worked pretty well, and I'm sure there are companies out there, not entirely like ezCater but also not entirely unlike it, where a company could provide a list of people who're going to the virtual retreat, what to send them, and their addresses, and it would be made to happen.
 
2022-04-29 10:12:49 AM  
My division has three units:
• The one that does customer service loves their annual retreat.
• The one that does media stuff does an annual retreat, but they could take it or leave it.
• The one that does technical stuff refuses to do a retreat.

I'm proud to be in the third group.
 
2022-04-29 10:23:36 AM  
Our retreats 20 years ago involved ATVs, shotguns, and endless alcohol for a week.  It was awesome.

I remember commenting several times that it was amazing no one ever died.  And then somebody died.

The point is retreats can be fun and deadly.
 
2022-04-29 10:28:00 AM  
We've replaced our usual retreat with a day of meetings! Bonus: you'll still be able to cram in all your usual work during your lunch hour. Won't this be fun?
 
2022-04-29 10:56:15 AM  

natazha: Rapmaster2000: Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.

That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.

I worked in Silicon Valley during the boom and never got any free drinks. But, I was working for real companies, not cash-burners. Remember "burn rate"?


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2022-04-29 11:09:20 AM  

Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.


Fortunately, they're also mostly pantsless.
 
2022-04-29 11:27:12 AM  
My wife's company does 2 per year. The one in July is a "planning meeting" where they go to a nice resort or beach house or whatever and work for a couple of days planning the strategy for the year. The Christmas party is a weekend party binge with the spouses included. Lots of booze and fun activities.
 
2022-04-29 11:30:04 AM  
My team has been asking me for a while about when we'll be able to get together in person. People are tired of looking at each other through Zoom windows, and a "virtual retreat" would probably cause a mutiny. With the weather getting better and travel restrictions (and budgets) loosening, we'll probably be able to do something soon.

/It helps to work at a place where people actually like each other and our retreats tend to be held at places a little more interesting than hotel convention rooms. YMMV.
 
2022-04-29 11:33:21 AM  
Staff retreat?  In our moment of triumph?! - Grand Moff Tarkin.
 
2022-04-29 12:03:48 PM  

SafetyThird: My wife's company does 2 per year. The one in July is a "planning meeting" where they go to a nice resort or beach house or whatever and work for a couple of days planning the strategy for the year. The Christmas party is a weekend party binge with the spouses included. Lots of booze and "fun activities."


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-04-29 2:21:19 PM  
Staff happy hours use to be fun, especially when we were billing the client.

Now companies are doing stupid shiat like virtual happy hours, and no I don't want to hang out with coworkers after work on a video call and drink a beer.

Companies will do anything to try and force teams together, and it does not work that way.
 
2022-04-29 2:53:15 PM  

Fear the Clam: My division has three units:
• The one that does customer service loves their annual retreat.
• The one that does media stuff does an annual retreat, but they could take it or leave it.
• The one that does technical stuff refuses to do a retreat.

I'm proud to be in the third group.


Yup. Expecting introverted tech geeks to have the same needs as extroverted sales weasels is a poor way to manage a company.
 
2022-04-29 3:55:16 PM  
double plus pointless.
 
2022-04-29 6:47:33 PM  
About to? Weren't they already?
 
2022-04-30 10:40:05 AM  

natazha: Rapmaster2000: Pocket Ninja: They've always been stupid. Virtual ones are simply more pointless.

That's not entirely true.  In the dotcom days, we always got free drinks.

I worked in Silicon Valley during the boom and never got any free drinks. But, I was working for real companies, not cash-burners. Remember "burn rate"?


Zynga has a brewery in the basement of the sf office, and they make plenty of money.
 
2022-04-30 6:18:39 PM  

JamesSirBensonMum: My wife's boss set one up for her team. It consisted of sending out a box of food, and having a chef talk everybody through making a gourmet meal with it. Everyone wore chef's hats and took their laptops to the kitchen to cook.
It was pretty goofy, but honestly, it's probably a clever way of doing a virtual team building exercise.
I'd be all in for a virtual wine, whiskey, or beer tasting team building exercise.


You know what is a good team-building exercise? Getting our work done.
 
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