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(YouTube)   This 1975 Mercury Grand Marquis coupe is nearly 20 feet long, and has more interior room than a Manhattan studio apartment. With only 17k original miles on it, it's definitely in better shape, too. What land yachts have YOU owned, Farkers?   (youtube.com) divider line
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1396 clicks; posted to Discussion » and STEM » on 24 Jan 2022 at 1:05 PM (23 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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offacue [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 12:45:25 PM  
Weeeeeeeeezard
 
The Third Man [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 12:49:43 PM  
Not me, but my grandparents owned a Dodge Diplomat, and that thing was a boat and a half:

Fark user imageView Full Size


/it also was available in a police cruiser edition
 
OldRod [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 12:52:39 PM  
I once owned a 1975 Mercury Grand Marquis.  Felt like I was navigating the Queen Mary whenever I drove it.
 
Smoohy [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 12:54:09 PM  
I upgraded from my mom's 1971 Chevy Nova (my friends correctly tagged it as a "birth control car") into a 1974 Oldsmobile 98. I called it "an acre of steel." I've lived in smaller apartments.
 
markie_farkie [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 12:56:44 PM  
Had a '73 Ford LTD four door. It was earwax gold with a white vinyl top. The interior had BROCADE UPHOLSTERY like grandma's couch, I shiat you not.

It was so enormous that a buddy of mine, who at the time was 6'7" and well over 350 lbs could sit in the back seat in complete comfort.

I bought it for $300, drove it for 2 years, and sold it for that, after doing nothing to it other than replacing a fan belt and installing a new battery.
 
TheHighlandHowler [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 12:58:24 PM  
'72 Buick Electra 225. 455 4V. 250 HP!
 
KC Dutchman [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:05:15 PM  
My family had a 1973 Chrysler Newport Custom

cdn02.carsforsale.comView Full Size
 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:06:15 PM  

OldRod: I once owned a 1975 Mercury Grand Marquis.  Felt like I was navigating the Queen Mary whenever I drove it.


I learned to drive on a '76 T-Bird.

photos.classiccars.comView Full Size



Seriously, talk about a land barge.
 
Tr0mBoNe [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:06:49 PM  
1984 Grand Marquis Station Wagon. We sold it in the mid 90s because the motor in it was still valuable. My only real memory is the crunk the doors made and the feeling of the pleather seats ripping off my skin on hot days.
 
dbirchall [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:07:16 PM  
Great, now even Fark headlines are phishing for information that might answer security questions on other sites.
 
Myk-House of El [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:09:55 PM  
I've had a couple in my life.  A 1961 Oldsmobile 98 would be the largest, though.  4 door hardtop.

I heard Fred Schneider had a Chrysler as big as a whale and sat about 20.
 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:10:23 PM  
Oh - and the first car I owned was a '78 Malibu Classic:

barnfinds.comView Full Size



More of a land tug rather than a barge.
 
Meltro [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:10:29 PM  
1988 Lincoln Town Car

I got it in '99 with 205k miles on it, busted heater core, and skipping timing chain at the age of 16.

I managed to put it on two wheels on more than one occasion, despite a full yard of shock travel

/I miss that car
 
ElwoodCuse
2022-01-24 1:10:48 PM  

Smoohy: 1974 Oldsmobile 98


Public Enemy - You're Gonna Get Yours
Youtube vYblg4i2HD8
 
optikeye [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:11:27 PM  
A 1976 Baby Blue Lincoln Continental named "Abe" with crushed velour seats.  Beautiful car....we did many road trips in "Abe" even down to Key West.
Abe had a drinking problem tho.......like 8 miles a gallon. We finally had to let him go. I miss Abe.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Butternut Squanch
2022-01-24 1:11:32 PM  
1966 Chrysler Newport.  Jesus Christ, that car guzzled gas. Moves like a fish, steers like a cow.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
SirDigbyChickenCaesar
2022-01-24 1:12:40 PM  
My first car was a 1976 Monte Carlo.  Crimson red.  It was a 5 minute walk from the drivers door to the front of the car.
 
mactheknife
2022-01-24 1:13:06 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

1973 Chevy Impala.  Same color as this one, same hard top.  Had it as my first car.  Once hit a cinder-block building with it, and dented the building... without putting so much as a scratch on the bumper.  Later pushed a full-size dumpster 50 feet across the parking lot of a gas station (deliberately) with it.  V8 350 engine with front and back full bench seating.  All you need is to install a shower to attach to the trunk and you've got a small apartment you can lease out.
 
little big man [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:15:20 PM  
77 Caprice Classic; she tallied about 18 feet in length, IIRC.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
IgG4 [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:15:48 PM  
I had a 76 Ford LTD. Baby blue with the white vinyl top. I think it got like 6 MPG.
 
Sword and Shield [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:15:56 PM  
94 Ford Taurus.

Previous owner blew the motor and transmission, and dropped in the motor/transmission package out of a Mustang from the same year. Still not very fast, but it was fast enough to be fun.

Bench front and back, and you could easily lie down in the backseat if you bent your legs a little. Wish I'd still had it when my wife and I were dating- it was easily big enough to fark on that backseat couch.
 
jdlenke
2022-01-24 1:16:06 PM  
Does it seat about twenty?
 
Marcus Aurelius [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:17:14 PM  
Pontiac Parisienne.  5100 pounds before you add gas or oil.  It had the road feel of a Barcalounger with handling to match.
 
mrmopar5287
2022-01-24 1:17:21 PM  

Sword and Shield: 94 Ford Taurus.

Previous owner blew the motor and transmission, and dropped in the motor/transmission package out of a Mustang from the same year.


Uh, no. Mustang is FR orientation of the drivetrain. The Taurus has always been traverse FWD. There is no possible way this drivetrain swap happened.
 
Sword and Shield [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:18:33 PM  
Though the "yeah, we should" car was actually my grandfather's. Dad got it after my grandfather died, and immediately wanted to sell it.

1992 Mercury Grand Marquis, and dad tossed me a hundred bucks to deoxidize and wax the whole damn thing. Acres of paint.

That one we did actually get busy in the backseat.
 
drsewell
2022-01-24 1:19:34 PM  

little big man: 77 Caprice Classic; she tallied about 18 feet in length, IIRC.

[Fark user image 425x283]


I had the 1972 version.
 
dittybopper
2022-01-24 1:19:35 PM  
The distaffbopper.
 
optikeye [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:20:13 PM  

mactheknife: All you need is to install a shower to attach to the trunk and you've got a small apartment you can lease out.


Americathon - Beach Boys - Opening Credits
Youtube OaFYcai1vK0
 
Picklehead [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:21:58 PM  

Meltro: 1988 Lincoln Town Car

I got it in '99 with 205k miles on it, busted heater core, and skipping timing chain at the age of 16.

I managed to put it on two wheels on more than one occasion, despite a full yard of shock travel

/I miss that car


I had the same car. It looked like this one. I loved it for travel.

img.scgpix.comView Full Size
 
Death Rocket [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:23:44 PM  
Oh I have a few, this is just one room.   And not everything is 100% done either.  But I do it as a hobby and don't really care if they ever do get done.


Fark user imageView Full Size


Lillith here is a 68, Also have a 60 caddy limo, a 64 continental, a couple cool old trucks one of which I'm building into a ramp truck so I can go hunting for more!

The rest are smaller, non-land yatchs
 
Serious Post on Serious Thread
2022-01-24 1:24:38 PM  
'76 Econoline. Floor to ceiling brown shag carpet and a definitely highly illegal non bolted down recliner couch in the back.

The body was mostly made of bondo by the time she got retired. Sadly apparently only value would have been if it had some kinda fuel injection or something.  But it didn't.  I think it's a backyard shed now.
 
tamsnod27
2022-01-24 1:25:25 PM  

little big man: 77 Caprice Classic; she tallied about 18 feet in length, IIRC.

[Fark user image 425x283]


79 Chevy Impala, 77 2 door was lemon so my father got almost full value for the 4 door, so it didn't cost him anymore, we kept that thing until the frame rusted out, I think he finally got rid it of in 1995, I learned to drive in that thing, it was a tank!
 
bigdog1960
2022-01-24 1:26:48 PM  
1974 New Yorker also had a 1971 Newport
Fark user imageView Full Size


New Yorker was about 19 ft. Could put 4 bodies in trunk. Easy to get laid in backseat, junior prom the first time. Am 6'4". Was more flexible then but i think i could still do it. Briefly had a 1972 pinto 2 door and I managed it there. I don't think I'd fit in driver seat now. I had a chevy geo with more room. Of course never got laid in the geo but i had a house then.
 
Auntie Cheesus [TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:27:48 PM  
I owned, at one point in my life, a 1975 Cadillac Fleetwood 75 limousine.  The bloody beast was 21 feet long, had a curb weight of 3 tons, came equipped with a 500 cubic inch engine that produced a whopping 190 HP, and did 0-60 in 13 seconds.

It was not a fast car.  It was not an economy car, as it got about 10 MPG highway and 8 in the city.  But it was a damned comfortable ride.
 
spleef420
2022-01-24 1:28:09 PM  
Dad had a fully restored '63 Bonneville 2-door hard top.
A friend of mine had a '69 Fury 3 4-door hard top that was ugly as all hell and would pass anything but a gas station.
 
MythDragon
2022-01-24 1:28:41 PM  
I miss those old cars. You could fit so many dead hookers in the trunk. Not like today's cars. You can barely get two of them in there, unless you want to start hacking limbs. But who wants that mess in their trunk with today's fabric trunk interiors? In the old days, you could just take the garden hose and spray that all out.
 
Serious Post on Serious Thread
2022-01-24 1:30:53 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: '76 Econoline. Floor to ceiling brown shag carpet and a definitely highly illegal non bolted down recliner couch in the back.

The body was mostly made of bondo by the time she got retired. Sadly apparently only value would have been if it had some kinda fuel injection or something.  But it didn't.  I think it's a backyard shed now.


Holy shiat! This isn't mine (the rear window wasn't a heart) but same crappy brown paint job! Got pulled over a few times. Never arrested. Think cops felt bad for me and I kept it immaculate inside 
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
dhickman
2022-01-24 1:32:00 PM  
I love the Ford Pather platform.  I just replaced an 88 marquis with 435K miles with a 2006 LTC Signature L with 60K miles.  

Dumbest move Ford did was to dump that paid for production line. Imagine a modern panther based vehicle, ICE based getting in the 40s.  Even more interesting, imagine something with the luxury of a LTC with an electric drive train.
 
Interceptor1
2022-01-24 1:34:28 PM  
Being that I am now a geriatric person incapable of driving fast cars anymore I had to move to an older model luxo barge. It's a four door sedan that is about 16' 6" long and seats five full size adults comfortably.

/  12.7 in the quarter mile on street tires
// 0-60 in about 4 seconds
/// 4775 lbs
 
yet_another_wumpus
2022-01-24 1:34:28 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


1979 Chevy Malibu Classic (previously wikis claimed it had to be a 1978, although I don't think it could possibly  have lasted so long if it was a first year model).  190", so I'm not sure it qualifies.  My parents bought it new, and eventually I wound up handing it over to a tow lot in 1995 as I couldn't give it away (Goodwill was closed due to getting multiple feet of snow in DC before I flew out of town).
 
maddan [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2022-01-24 1:35:08 PM  
I had a 1971 Electra 225.  When I got rid of it, the navy bought it to use as an auxiliary aircraft carrier, because you could land an aircraft on the hood of that bastard!
 
sno man [recently expired TotalFark]
2022-01-24 1:35:29 PM  
'78 4dr sky blue Skylark. It had the 305 V8 (which you could crawl in there with it to work on it.)
It also took a week and a gallon of gas to get up to highway speed.
 
comrade
2022-01-24 1:36:33 PM  
A friend in high school had a huge old car. I don't know what it was but we could stuff 5 people in the trunk when we went to drive-in movies. It was rusted out everywhere and you could see the road flying by beneath your feet and we used to shoot bottle rockets out through holes in the doors. Eventually the frame broke and the car just collapsed in the center as he was driving down the highway.
 
Everything is Awful
2022-01-24 1:39:55 PM  
I had a 95 Buick Park Ave. Champagne. Very much an old man car but I loved it.

In high school my friend had an early 80s Crown Vic. We called it The White Whale. Smoked a lot of weed in that beast.
 
TheSubjunctive
2022-01-24 1:42:22 PM  
1973 Cadillac 500-ci hearse.  Doesn't get more land-yachty than a hearse.
 
Everything is Awful
2022-01-24 1:44:56 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh - and the first car I owned was a '78 Malibu Classic:

[barnfinds.com image 630x355]


More of a land tug rather than a barge.


I love that car. My dad had one; it was the first car I ever drove on a road. Dad needed to take it to the shop so he borrowed his friend's car and had me follow him in the 'bu when I was 15.
 
Heamer [BareFark]
2022-01-24 1:45:20 PM  
I used to drive my dad's 1979 Ford Ranchero when I was in high school. After learning how to parallel park that behemoth, I could park anything.
 
gunsmack
2022-01-24 1:48:25 PM  
1970 Monte Carlo SS

external-content.duckduckgo.comView Full Size


/ 15 mpg
// sleeps six
 
Sexy Jesus
2022-01-24 1:51:15 PM  
68 Biscayne - car was indestructable
69 Galaxy 500 convertible - quite destructable
77 T Bird
 
Atomic Jonb
2022-01-24 1:54:44 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: Serious Post on Serious Thread: '76 Econoline. Floor to ceiling brown shag carpet and a definitely highly illegal non bolted down recliner couch in the back.

The body was mostly made of bondo by the time she got retired. Sadly apparently only value would have been if it had some kinda fuel injection or something.  But it didn't.  I think it's a backyard shed now.

Holy shiat! This isn't mine (the rear window wasn't a heart) but same crappy brown paint job! Got pulled over a few times. Never arrested. Think cops felt bad for me and I kept it immaculate inside [Fark user image 425x318]


My mom drove an old Dodge Van that had 3 benches behind the front seats so my sister and I were out of arms reach of each other.   Whoever behaved worse got the front bench so my parents could swat us as they drove.  But they could stuff a baseball team in there if they had to.
 
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