Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KSAT San Antonio)   Woman arrested after trying to buy a child at Walmart and not knowing jack shiat about haggling   (ksat.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Daniel Craig, Houston, Rebecca Taylor, Coroner, Bertolt Brecht, Texas woman, sheriff's deputies, KSAT's sister station KPRC  
•       •       •

4247 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jan 2022 at 6:50 AM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



56 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2022-01-23 1:26:41 AM  
c.tenor.comView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 1:44:41 AM  
Did the parent at least offer to throw in a gourd for free?
 
2022-01-23 2:31:33 AM  
The quality of children available at Walmart is pretty low.   I heard Donnie was a green light special.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-01-23 2:53:29 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 3:03:21 AM  
I'd ask why she wouldn't simply try to first adopt a child, but something tells me that someone who tries to buy a child in a Walmart checkout line for half a million dollars has probably been flagged as being dangerously unstable by an agency or two.

/just a hunch
 
433 [TotalFark]
2022-01-23 3:36:53 AM  
I don't have children and if it came right down to it, I would pay to continue to not have children.
 
2022-01-23 5:25:04 AM  
She should have tried to buy a kid at the Dollar Palace. That way she wouldn't have had to get all dressed up to commit crimes.
 
2022-01-23 6:04:24 AM  
A HALF A MILLION DOLLARS?

Holy sh*t, you want a baby? I can find someone to split that money with, and hell yeah you can have a baby.

Who here wants to get preggo for $250k? We don't even need to ever be in the same room. I get a plastic cup, you get a turkey baster or whatever.

BAM! We both get $250k. We could do this like once a year.
 
2022-01-23 6:54:38 AM  
People don't go to Walmart for 500,000$ babies.
 
2022-01-23 7:00:48 AM  
Strangely lucid comments in tfa considering it's from Texas
 
2022-01-23 7:02:55 AM  

433: I don't have children and if it came right down to it, I would pay to continue to not have children.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 7:15:11 AM  
Wal-Babys are adorable
th.bing.comView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 7:34:10 AM  
Fake news. Plantation owners don't shop at Walmart.
 
2022-01-23 7:42:04 AM  
Ya..The babies you'd get at a Wal*Mart would be more of a roasin' baby..Not a fryin' baby..
You really need to get to Dollar Tree for a friar...And you don't even have to dress up!
 
2022-01-23 7:45:18 AM  
"Work Mexican, Work" song by Butters Stotch
Youtube VFt_v5Bq9PQ
 
2022-01-23 7:47:13 AM  
Who would buy a baby at Wal-Mart? I mean they just break down in a month or 2. Kmart use to sell children of better quality, they broke down around 6 months. Target has the best children that last years and years! The up side to a Wal-Mart child is you can exchang them for new ones, but you can't get your money back.
 
2022-01-23 7:56:44 AM  

Salmon: People don't go to Walmart for 500,000$ babies.


This is what I find confusing. Someone thought she was serious?
If I was that desperate and had $500k  I'd camp outside an adoption agency and cut-off people with kids going in. And I'd. Make sure a lawyer was involved at some point.
Or an even more extreme measure I'd bribe the care workers who deal with unwed mothers in the hospital.

/it's interesting in Islam how much it is encouraged to take care of orphans BUT you cannot give them your name. You can make them part of the will, however (you can will up to a third of your inheritance).
 
2022-01-23 8:07:46 AM  
Just picking up a few things..

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 8:13:49 AM  

Mr. Shabooboo: Ya..The babies you'd get at a Wal*Mart would be more of a roasin' baby..Not a fryin' baby..
You really need to get to Dollar Tree for a friar...And you don't even have to dress up!


That was my thought, she's probably got a recipe brewing in her cauldron somewhere
 
2022-01-23 8:18:33 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 8:21:43 AM  

NothingCanPossiblyeGoWrong: Mr. Shabooboo: Ya..The babies you'd get at a Wal*Mart would be more of a roasin' baby..Not a fryin' baby..
You really need to get to Dollar Tree for a friar...And you don't even have to dress up!

That was my thought, she's probably got a recipe brewing in her cauldron somewhere


Ya'll know Dollar Tree is too pricey for those types right? You gotta go to the store that's now operating in what used to be a Dollar Tree, selling surplus merch they buy by the trailer load. They have the best meth too if you're curious. Pure high end trucker quality shiat.
 
2022-01-23 8:25:53 AM  
You know that when that baby grows up he's going to do something incredibly stupid at age 17, and the thought "Wonder what I would have done with $500k . . ." will briefly cross his mom's mond.
 
2022-01-23 8:26:08 AM  
*mind
 
2022-01-23 8:26:28 AM  
I dated a girl whose parents bought her from a Hungarian orphanage.  Can't complain about it-it is what it is and in the end she had a really nice life because of it.
 
2022-01-23 8:27:46 AM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: Just picking up a few things..

[Fark user image image 650x892]


Probably returning them
 
2022-01-23 8:40:25 AM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: Just picking up a few things..

[Fark user image image 650x892]


*insert Matt Gaetz joke here*
 
2022-01-23 8:42:02 AM  

Mr. Shabooboo: Ya..The babies you'd get at a Wal*Mart would be more of a roasin' baby..Not a fryin' baby..
You really need to get to Dollar Tree for a friar...And you don't even have to dress up!


"No thanks, I'm a vegetarian." is a great thing to say when someone hands you a baby.
 
2022-01-23 8:58:18 AM  
How does someone get charged for this?  I'd think a "dude, I was kidding. I don't even have 500 dollars let alone $500,000. I thought the kid was cute, and I made what I now realize is a stupid and offensive joke. I apologize and it won't happen again." would solve that.

Unless she is so stupid she said to the cop "yeah I was trying to buy the kid. Why you got one you want to sell?"
 
2022-01-23 9:33:27 AM  

darkman2000: Mr. Shabooboo: Ya..The babies you'd get at a Wal*Mart would be more of a roasin' baby..Not a fryin' baby..
You really need to get to Dollar Tree for a friar...And you don't even have to dress up!

"No thanks, I'm a vegetarian." is a great thing to say when someone hands you a baby.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 9:36:27 AM  
Every Texas parent, from now on, will be able to say.  "If you don't behave, I'll take you over to Wal*mart and come back almost a millionaire."

Wonder what the law is for selling adults family members? My wife tried to sell me for a quarter.  The market was that great.
 
2022-01-23 9:40:57 AM  
I'd don't blame the mother for declining the offer. Does she really look like the type of person with access to that sort of cash?
 
2022-01-23 9:44:51 AM  
Gotta go to Nashville Aldi for those.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 9:46:29 AM  
So if I go into a WalMart and do the Blues Brothers "how much for the little girls, sell me your children" bit, that's a third degree felony? Wow

<sell me your children.jpg> yes I know it's been posted already
 
2022-01-23 9:48:21 AM  
Costco is the place to buy children. Price can't be beat, especially if you're buying more than one, and the free samples available around the store keep the children happy. Plus, their return policy is very accommodating.
 
2022-01-23 9:48:32 AM  

Mr. Fuzzypaws: Gotta go to Nashville Aldi for those.

[Fark user image image 675x1500]


Awe man! They only have a pink one left.
 
2022-01-23 9:53:15 AM  

MythDragon: How does someone get charged for this?  I'd think a "dude, I was kidding. I don't even have 500 dollars let alone $500,000. I thought the kid was cute, and I made what I now realize is a stupid and offensive joke. I apologize and it won't happen again." would solve that.

Unless she is so stupid she said to the cop "yeah I was trying to buy the kid. Why you got one you want to sell?"


The part where she threatened to just take the baby is probably what got the police involved.
 
2022-01-23 9:55:09 AM  
Black people get particularly testy about this.
 
2022-01-23 10:53:35 AM  
Baby? No, but I can get you a toe
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 10:55:29 AM  

Resident Muslim: Salmon: People don't go to Walmart for 500,000$ babies.
This is what I find confusing. Someone thought she was serious?
If I was that desperate and had $500k  I'd camp outside an adoption agency and cut-off people with kids going in. And I'd. Make sure a lawyer was involved at some point.
Or an even more extreme measure I'd bribe the care workers who deal with unwed mothers in the hospital.
/it's interesting in Islam how much it is encouraged to take care of orphans BUT you cannot give them your name. You can make them part of the will, however (you can will up to a third of your inheritance).


I know there are states where you can offer to buy a baby from a pregnant woman.  I've seen the ads.  But you phrase it in a way where it's like you pay the medical bills, and then this nice couple just happens to be right there when you decide to give your newborn up for adoption.  Surprise!

This can get pretty messy, you bet, and lawyers have to be involved.
 
2022-01-23 11:04:33 AM  
$500k? If she wouldnt mind a slightly used child im willing to talk. College tuition is coming up next year.
 
2022-01-23 11:04:54 AM  
She looks very Texas.
 
2022-01-23 11:15:03 AM  
Becky, (because of course it's Becky), wait until Texas is a Republic again and buy all the babies you want.
 
2022-01-23 11:58:38 AM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: Just picking up a few things..

[Fark user image 650x892]


Man, Stevie Nicks has really let herself go.
 
2022-01-23 12:29:12 PM  

Ivo Shandor: [c.tenor.com image 498x216] [View Full Size image _x_]


Done in one.
 
2022-01-23 12:30:43 PM  
ThatwasEpic
 
2022-01-23 12:50:59 PM  

Unrepentant Fool: I'd ask why she wouldn't simply try to first adopt a child, but something tells me that someone who tries to buy a child in a Walmart checkout line for half a million dollars has probably been flagged as being dangerously unstable by an agency or two.

/just a hunch


Or she's just a nut job with 2 quarters to her name.
 
2022-01-23 12:51:53 PM  
She offered $500k?  And bail was set at $50k?  I mean, I understand the presumption of innocence, but that seems like bad math.

/She looks like an actress, but I can't remember the actress's name... always played a sassy southern woman, a nurse or a waitress?  She might have looked like that 20-30 years ago but would be older now... this is going to bother me.
 
2022-01-23 12:52:33 PM  

bigdog1960: Unrepentant Fool: I'd ask why she wouldn't simply try to first adopt a child, but something tells me that someone who tries to buy a child in a Walmart checkout line for half a million dollars has probably been flagged as being dangerously unstable by an agency or two.

/just a hunch

Or she's just a nut job with 2 quarters to her name.


Also I knew it was Texas without looking.
 
2022-01-23 1:24:38 PM  
As it turns out, Calvin's dad wasn't that far off after all.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-23 1:47:27 PM  
I'm sure the kid cried out after being passed over the bar code scanner in the self checkout live.
 
Displayed 50 of 56 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.