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(GQ Magazine (UK))   All MCU movies and TV shows (through today) ranked. Various outrage and agreement to the right   (gq-magazine.co.uk) divider line
    More: Survey, Superhero, Iron Man, Marvel Comics, Stan Lee, Marvel Studios, Iron Man 2, Marvel Team-Up, decent first film  
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1389 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 21 Jan 2022 at 5:35 PM (17 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-01-21 4:58:45 PM  
The snap heard around the world. The greatest cinematic cliffhanger of all time. However you dress it, one thing is certain: the child in the Spider-Man costume, who bawled his little eyes out as his dad carried him out of the screening I attended after watching his hero turn to dust, is still traumatised.

Wow. That is brutal. I hope the kid was better after "Endgame."
 
2022-01-21 5:06:14 PM  
Thor 2 is placed too high in the list. Winter Soldier is WAY too low. The rest of them are weirdly placed in general, too.
 
2022-01-21 5:07:26 PM  
Eternals is ranked too damn high.

**SPOILER**
It's a 2.5 hour abortion. Literally, that's what it's about. Aborting a baby god to protect the mother (i.e. Earth).

And it's just so goddamn boring.
 
2022-01-21 5:09:18 PM  
Far From Home is also too high. That's the weakest Spider-Man and weaker than a lot of the other sequels on there.
 
2022-01-21 5:27:53 PM  

Bootleg: Thor 2 is placed too high in the list. Winter Soldier is WAY too low. The rest of them are weirdly placed in general, too.


Yeah, "Winter Soldier" should be up in the top 5 easily. "Civil War" should be much lower. And GOG as the best?? Seriously??? It was good, but it wasn't "Infinity Wars" or "Ragnarock."
 
2022-01-21 5:32:27 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2022-01-21 5:33:35 PM  

bostonguy: The snap heard around the world. The greatest cinematic cliffhanger of all time. However you dress it, one thing is certain: the child in the Spider-Man costume, who bawled his little eyes out as his dad carried him out of the screening I attended after watching his hero turn to dust, is still traumatised.

Wow. That is brutal. I hope the kid was better after "Endgame."


People can say what they will about Marvel movies, but I will remember two things for the rest of my life.

1. The entire theater was dead silent as we walked out of "Infinity War."

2. The entire theater stood up and cheered at the Portals scene in "Endgame."

That is making movies that affect audiences.
 
2022-01-21 5:46:26 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Eternals is ranked too damn high.

**SPOILER**
It's a 2.5 hour abortion.

And it's just so goddamn boring.


(Edited the quote to remove spoilers)

I really think it should have been a TV show to give them more time to explore some of the themes and ideas. Maybe give some more screen time to Jon Snow and the Super Deviant, both of whom didn't seem to serve any real purpose in the movie. It somehow felt too slow AND too rushed at times.

And the stakes were WAY to high. For beings which are supposed to hang in the background and protect humanity, the story should have ended by more or less restoring the status quo, with the big reveal of their true purpose at the very end to set up plot for sequels and the MCU.

That said, the ending was f*cking confounding. I have no idea why they would leave it this way.
 
2022-01-21 5:46:50 PM  
I stopped reading when I saw What If? was third from the bottom. It deserves a higher rating just for Super soldier (and super sexy) Peggy Carter.
 
2022-01-21 5:48:14 PM  

bostonguy: bostonguy: The snap heard around the world. The greatest cinematic cliffhanger of all time. However you dress it, one thing is certain: the child in the Spider-Man costume, who bawled his little eyes out as his dad carried him out of the screening I attended after watching his hero turn to dust, is still traumatised.

Wow. That is brutal. I hope the kid was better after "Endgame."

People can say what they will about Marvel movies, but I will remember two things for the rest of my life.

1. The entire theater was dead silent as we walked out of "Infinity War."

2. The entire theater stood up and cheered at the Portals scene in "Endgame."

That is making movies that affect audiences.


The MCU is not known for their musical scores, but the last few minutes of Infinity War's score were spot on perfect with the cellos. Some of the best film scoring in recent memory.
 
2022-01-21 5:48:36 PM  
Okay, I'm 100% in the camp that didn't like Captain Marvel, but putting it below The Eternals is harsh as fark, bro.

Especially if they're ostensibly trying to judge on quality in a way that ignores box office, because they put Endgame, the pointless subplot spring-cleaning movie that literally un-wrote most of the thing in the MCU that had actual emotional resonance and had a nonsensical time-travel plot that couldn't even stay consistent mechanically across the one movie, at number ten.  Even if they're trying to give it bonus points for being the ending/epilogue of the entirety of the "actually really good" run of the MCU, that's sticking it on top of a lot of almost objectively superior films.

... there, did I do it right?

I'm not sure I did it right.

Sorry, subby, the correct answer to any MCU ranking thing is "the films are quite literally intentionally written into entirely different genres, it is not possible to create any set of criteria beyond bare-bones technical competence that allows you to compare even any given three of them straight across, much less all of them".  It's just too mind-numbingly obvious that this is the case for me to even convincingly pretend to be outraged about this.

// Ragnarok and Guardians 1 top my personal list, too, but the way I would have phrased that is "I like comedies".
 
2022-01-21 5:54:13 PM  
Anyone who would rank Eternals above Winter Soldier is not a person I ever want to have a real life conversation with.
 
2022-01-21 5:54:39 PM  

Shostie: scottydoesntknow: Eternals is ranked too damn high.

**SPOILER**
It's a 2.5 hour abortion.

And it's just so goddamn boring.

(Edited the quote to remove spoilers)

I really think it should have been a TV show to give them more time to explore some of the themes and ideas. Maybe give some more screen time to Jon Snow and the Super Deviant, both of whom didn't seem to serve any real purpose in the movie. It somehow felt too slow AND too rushed at times.

And the stakes were WAY to high. For beings which are supposed to hang in the background and protect humanity, the story should have ended by more or less restoring the status quo, with the big reveal of their true purpose at the very end to set up plot for sequels and the MCU.

That said, the ending was f*cking confounding. I have no idea why they would leave it this way.


Agreed. It was basically Marvel's Justice League. Rushed to get them all on screen, with no one getting any real focus or development.

One of the problems I'm running into with Marvel is how every movie now is basically set up to be multiple backdoors into other movies. Kit being there served no purpose other than to set up the next movie with a certain vampire hunter. Kor (which is apparently the super deviant, only got that from TVTropes) also really didn't have a reason to be there other than to be a hero killer. Robb Stark was a waste and telegraphed from a mile away. Only ones I really liked in the movie were the speedster (not even gonna try to type her name from memory, M-something) and the brainwashing guy.

And yea, that ending. Everyone on earth should be dead. Should've been dead the second that volcano did its big eruption.
 
2022-01-21 5:58:08 PM  
Shang-Chi is good, but too high on that list.

Black Widow is WAY too high.

Hawkeye is higher than I expected it to be, but is almost good enough to actually rate near that spot.

Eternals is way too high.

The Falcon & The Winter Soldier is somewhat too high.

Captain Marvel is marginally too low.
 
2022-01-21 6:03:47 PM  
The Incredible Hulk is too high.
 
2022-01-21 6:06:15 PM  

The Martian Manhandler: I stopped reading when I saw What If? was third from the bottom. It deserves a higher rating just for Super soldier (and super sexy) Peggy Carter.


Which is interesting since that was the worst of the "What ifs...."

It was fine, but not much is different or changes other than it being Peggy instead of Steve.
 
2022-01-21 6:06:58 PM  
If The Eternals isn't last, the list is broken. That was the only actively bad movie in the MCU. Thor 2 wasn't great, but it was watchable. The Eternals was half an hour too long, yet barely developed any of the characters. The super Deviant had no reason to exist. The big finale should have attracted the attention of at least a single Avenger.

Captain Marvel was...fine. I enjoyed the casting alright and the villain was no worse than most MCU villains, but so much of the movie was "She's a superhero, but she's a girl. Whoa!"  The needle-drop of Just a Girl was just too farking on the nose.
 
2022-01-21 6:12:42 PM  

Jim_Callahan: Okay, I'm 100% in the camp that didn't like Captain Marvel, but putting it below The Eternals is harsh as fark, bro.


I haven't seen Eternals yet, but Captain Marvel is my absolute worst of the ones I've seen. I wanted to like that movie because it had a hero cat, but even that couldn't save it.
 
2022-01-21 6:16:07 PM  

NeoCortex42: Thor 2 wasn't great, but it was watchable.


It was part of the "pick a different genre for every movie" original run of the MCU, I think Thor 2 just kinda pulled the short straw by way of that genre being "1980s fantasy epic", basically all of which were, in retrospect, kinda not that great to begin with.  And also a genre whose nostalgia value was weakened a lot by LotR basically doing a massive callback to it in the '00s that was so well-done that it kinda closed the book on it, recently enough that everyone remembers it.

In light of what it was trying to do, Thor 2 was pretty good at doing... that.  It's just that the thing it was trying to do wasn't something many people enjoy; see also CA: First Avenger, which I liked because I liked the things it was referencing but no other living person on the continent ranks very high because I guess I'm the only one.
 
2022-01-21 6:21:17 PM  
Shang-Chi is easily top 10. The rest of the list is just as wrong.
 
2022-01-21 6:22:59 PM  
the old xmen on tv were cheap and, in general, stunk
 
2022-01-21 6:26:08 PM  

Jim_Callahan: NeoCortex42: Thor 2 wasn't great, but it was watchable.

It was part of the "pick a different genre for every movie" original run of the MCU, I think Thor 2 just kinda pulled the short straw by way of that genre being "1980s fantasy epic", basically all of which were, in retrospect, kinda not that great to begin with.  And also a genre whose nostalgia value was weakened a lot by LotR basically doing a massive callback to it in the '00s that was so well-done that it kinda closed the book on it, recently enough that everyone remembers it.

In light of what it was trying to do, Thor 2 was pretty good at doing... that.  It's just that the thing it was trying to do wasn't something many people enjoy; see also CA: First Avenger, which I liked because I liked the things it was referencing but no other living person on the continent ranks very high because I guess I'm the only one.


Thor 2's biggest fault was wasting Eccleston.
 
2022-01-21 6:28:12 PM  

RolfBlitzer: The Incredible Hulk is too high.


I rather enjoyed it, but it's a story and style that doesn't fit with the rest of the MCU. Then again, I grew up watching the Incredible Hulk TV show and I thought it was very much in that vein.
 
2022-01-21 6:30:40 PM  

NewWorldDan: RolfBlitzer: The Incredible Hulk is too high.

I rather enjoyed it, but it's a story and style that doesn't fit with the rest of the MCU. Then again, I grew up watching the Incredible Hulk TV show and I thought it was very much in that vein.


It's not bad, but it was before the MCU house style took form based on Iron Man. So it feels really out of place to go back and watch.
 
2022-01-21 6:36:57 PM  
I keep forgetting the 2012 movie is called Avengers Assemble outside of the US.

It's still my favorite of the MCU.
 
2022-01-21 6:43:34 PM  
What If? and especially Winter Soldier are way too low, as is Loki.

Iron Man 3 should be all the way at the bottom with Iron Man 2.

Black Panther is way too high. It's a mediocre MCU movie at best.
 
2022-01-21 6:50:28 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Eternals is ranked too damn high.

**SPOILER**
It's a 2.5 hour abortion. Literally, that's what it's about. Aborting a baby god to protect the mother (i.e. Earth).

And it's just so goddamn boring.


It's basically a marvel power rangers movie.

They kill off salma, and barely use kit, who are the two best actors and biggest names.

Then you are left with 5 nobodies all wearing different colors.
 
2022-01-21 6:58:45 PM  
22. Ant-Man


Stopped there.
 
2022-01-21 7:02:08 PM  
I appreciated how this list ranked the Marvel movies that I especially like high on the list, but I didn't care for them also placing Marvel movies that weren't the best up near the top as well.

Also, I like that they ranked Marvel movies that were not as good as others near the bottom of the list, but am pissed that they also put some of my favorite Marvel movies down there, too.

Anybody who disagrees with me is wrong.
 
2022-01-21 7:04:58 PM  

Bootleg: Thor 2 is placed too high in the list. Winter Soldier is WAY too low. The rest of them are weirdly placed in general, too.


Thor: Ragnarok is too low.
 
2022-01-21 7:12:29 PM  

The Martian Manhandler: I stopped reading when I saw What If? was third from the bottom. It deserves a higher rating just for Super soldier (and super sexy) Peggy Carter.


Peggy Carter, who after getting the ranks as an super soldier, and ostensibly being the lead of the episode still played second fiddle to Steve Rogers? No, that episode sucked as well.
 
2022-01-21 8:06:51 PM  
bostonguy: 2. The entire theater stood up and cheered at the Portals scene in "Endgame.
That is making movies that affect audiences.


It was okay, but it was no
Fark user imageView Full Size

The theater I was in farking exploded.
 
2022-01-21 8:10:13 PM  
Add me to the list of people who thought the WS beneath Eternals kills things.
 
2022-01-21 8:16:28 PM  
Yes I'm a fan of the M.C.U.
The Mister Men Cinematic Universe

upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size
 
2022-01-21 8:30:46 PM  
I LOVED Guardians of the Galaxy but it's not #1.  I'd give that to Iron Man (2008), Endgame, Black Panther, Winter Soldier, or Avengers.  Those are the top 5, in no particular order, with GotG at #6.  There's nothing wrong with GotG; the other movies are simply better.
 
2022-01-21 8:36:33 PM  

NeoCortex42: NewWorldDan: RolfBlitzer: The Incredible Hulk is too high.

I rather enjoyed it, but it's a story and style that doesn't fit with the rest of the MCU. Then again, I grew up watching the Incredible Hulk TV show and I thought it was very much in that vein.

It's not bad, but it was before the MCU house style took form based on Iron Man. So it feels really out of place to go back and watch.


Don't make Samsung's A.I. digital assistant angry. You wouldn't like it― when it's angry.
 
2022-01-21 8:36:33 PM  

brigid_fitch: I LOVED Guardians of the Galaxy but it's not #1.  I'd give that to Iron Man (2008), Endgame, Black Panther, Winter Soldier, or Avengers.  Those are the top 5, in no particular order, with GotG at #6.  There's nothing wrong with GotG; the other movies are simply better.


Iron Man should be number one as it was not only a good movie (with perfect casting for Tony Stark), it walso set the formula for the MCU.
 
2022-01-21 8:39:57 PM  

Bootleg: Thor 2 is placed too high in the list. Winter Soldier is WAY too low. The rest of them are weirdly placed in general, too.


Agreed, Winter soldier is my favorite movie in the MCU.  But hey, clickbait gonna clickbait.
 
2022-01-21 8:51:07 PM  

brigid_fitch: I LOVED Guardians of the Galaxy but it's not #1.  I'd give that to Iron Man (2008), Endgame, Black Panther, Winter Soldier, or Avengers.  Those are the top 5, in no particular order, with GotG at #6.  There's nothing wrong with GotG; the other movies are simply better.


I love Iron Man 1, but the villain is very weak (in spite of great casting).  I can see ranking it higher based on what it started, but I think movies like Winter Soldier surpassed it overall.
 
2022-01-21 9:11:41 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Shostie: scottydoesntknow: Eternals is ranked too damn high.

**SPOILER**
It's a 2.5 hour abortion.

And it's just so goddamn boring.

(Edited the quote to remove spoilers)

I really think it should have been a TV show to give them more time to explore some of the themes and ideas. Maybe give some more screen time to Jon Snow and the Super Deviant, both of whom didn't seem to serve any real purpose in the movie. It somehow felt too slow AND too rushed at times.

And the stakes were WAY to high. For beings which are supposed to hang in the background and protect humanity, the story should have ended by more or less restoring the status quo, with the big reveal of their true purpose at the very end to set up plot for sequels and the MCU.

That said, the ending was f*cking confounding. I have no idea why they would leave it this way.

Agreed. It was basically Marvel's Justice League. Rushed to get them all on screen, with no one getting any real focus or development.

One of the problems I'm running into with Marvel is how every movie now is basically set up to be multiple backdoors into other movies. Kit being there served no purpose other than to set up the next movie with a certain vampire hunter. Kor (which is apparently the super deviant, only got that from TVTropes) also really didn't have a reason to be there other than to be a hero killer. Robb Stark was a waste and telegraphed from a mile away. Only ones I really liked in the movie were the speedster (not even gonna try to type her name from memory, M-something) and the brainwashing guy.

And yea, that ending. Everyone on earth should be dead. Should've been dead the second that volcano did its big eruption.


I literally just finished watching it for the first time a few minutes ago.

I'd also like to add that the Ikaris thing was SO obvious I called it out about 30 seconds after he came on screen and thought I was being silly.  But no.  That was it.  "Evil Superman" is the twist.  Ugh.

Worse, that twist's been done, and recently.  And way better.  Both The Boys and Invincible had much better takes on that, much better action scenes with the powerset, and it felt deconstructive of the character rather than just a pointless heelturn in the last half.

There's also what, 5 romance relationships in the show?  Kit/Sersi, Ikaris/Sersi, Sprite/Ikaris, Gilgamesh/Thena, and Makkari/Druig.  The last two are only really implied, but they're also the only two that feel real.  The other three are major plot elements, and all of them feel forced and pointless.  Kit/Sersi I can give the most leeway to since they barely had him in this (and apparently just to introduce Black Knight, which I'm actually fine with) but the two around Ikaris are just complete duds.  No chemistry, and no real indications of actual emotion to the point they have to explicitly tell you, because you wouldn't deduce it naturally.

No consequences for Ikaris (he gets to nobly kill himself like a coward, and not in a "noble sacrifice" way, just in a "I don't want to live with what I've done" way).  No consequences for Sprite, who gets everything she ever wanted.  The alpha deviant ties for basically no real reason; they could have just not shown up to the final fight and nothing meaningful changes, it just feels like an excuse to eliminate a potentially interesting character.

It's a frustrating film.  I feel like it got committeed to death and was originally intended to be two films; the first setting up the characters in a fun romp saving humanity from the evil Deviants.  And then a second where you start going hard on the deconstruction and everything turning on them.
 
2022-01-21 9:30:25 PM  
I liked Eternals but it was not better than Winter Soldier. I would place it pretty close to the bottom of the list, actually. Not because it's "bad" but because so much of the MCU is really good.

The bottom of the list for me would be Incredible Hulk, as it doesn't exactly fit in with the rest of the MCU and What If, because so much of it was pandering fan service.
 
2022-01-21 9:34:40 PM  
That is one terrible list.
 
2022-01-21 9:42:47 PM  

Shostie: bostonguy: bostonguy: The snap heard around the world. The greatest cinematic cliffhanger of all time. However you dress it, one thing is certain: the child in the Spider-Man costume, who bawled his little eyes out as his dad carried him out of the screening I attended after watching his hero turn to dust, is still traumatised.

Wow. That is brutal. I hope the kid was better after "Endgame."

People can say what they will about Marvel movies, but I will remember two things for the rest of my life.

1. The entire theater was dead silent as we walked out of "Infinity War."

2. The entire theater stood up and cheered at the Portals scene in "Endgame."

That is making movies that affect audiences.

The MCU is not known for their musical scores, but the last few minutes of Infinity War's score were spot on perfect with the cellos. Some of the best film scoring in recent memory.


Alan Silvestri - The Real Hero (From "Avengers: Endgame"/Audio Only)
Youtube QMe8e5GcY0c
That piece was perfect. Even with just the music it hits you hard. I actually put it into the Spotify playlist I created should I ever kick the bucket.
 
2022-01-21 9:43:58 PM  

The Silver Mullet: Shang-Chi is easily top 10.


Son, people can see you.

When your doctor tells you to take your meds every day, he means every day!.
 
2022-01-21 9:59:21 PM  
I thought the Netflix shows were technically part of the same universe? Whar Daredevil?
 
2022-01-21 10:05:40 PM  
Swap Winter Soldier and Shang-Chi and it's at least in the ballpark.
 
2022-01-21 10:11:22 PM  

Chemlight Battery: I thought the Netflix shows were technically part of the same universe? Whar Daredevil?


They're not in the same universe. I mean, have you ever seen a character from the Netflix shows appear in the MCU? No. No you haven't.
 
2022-01-21 10:22:06 PM  

bostonguy: The snap heard around the world. The greatest cinematic cliffhanger of all time. However you dress it, one thing is certain: the child in the Spider-Man costume, who bawled his little eyes out as his dad carried him out of the screening I attended after watching his hero turn to dust, is still traumatised.

Wow. That is brutal. I hope the kid was better after "Endgame."


Please.

I grew up with Large Marge.
 
2022-01-21 10:30:45 PM  

WhippingBoi: Chemlight Battery: I thought the Netflix shows were technically part of the same universe? Whar Daredevil?

They're not in the same universe. I mean, have you ever seen a character from the Netflix shows appear in the MCU? No. No you haven't.


Kingpin was in Hawkeye and Matt Murdoch was in No Way Home.
 
2022-01-21 10:31:17 PM  

Slypork: WhippingBoi: Chemlight Battery: I thought the Netflix shows were technically part of the same universe? Whar Daredevil?

They're not in the same universe. I mean, have you ever seen a character from the Netflix shows appear in the MCU? No. No you haven't.

Kingpin was in Hawkeye and Matt Murdoch was in No Way Home.


Forgot to add: SAME ACTORS.
 
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