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758 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jan 2022 at 10:26 AM (18 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
Welcome to Fark's Headline of the Month Voting for December 2021!

Great Fark headlines take all forms! Puns, wordplay, fun obscure references, visual, lyrics or verse, context - like buried lede and plot twist (click through to read the story to figure out the joke - these are often some of the best), and just damn clever or a sideways look at the story or the world.

Take the time to read and laugh. Then vote!

Vote for any or all! We don't limit your voting, we really want to see what you laughed at and enjoyed!

Voting starts Thursday, January 13 and ends Monday, January 17, 4pm Eastern.

Vote, vote, vote, and let's see what you love best for December 2021 Headlines of the Month!
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
Up to 8 feet of snow expected to fall in Sierra Nevada mountains of California. Milk and bread distributors spotted yacht shopping


Linked article: usatoday.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
They took our JEBs!


Linked article: wtop.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
Star of "19 Kids and Counting" convicted on two counts of exactly what you'd expect


Linked article: apnews.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
First opening its doors in 1800, the First Presbyterian Church of Bellefonte has seen its last Day-O


Linked article: apnews.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
With a location description as vague as that, it's a wonder they found her at all


Linked article: kold.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:49 PM  
CIA Adviser says US is closer to civil war than any of us would like to believe. Fortunately she has book coming out


Linked article: msn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
"Undertakers, rabbis join global fight promoting COVID shots" The Rabbis make sense, but for the undertakers, this seems like a conflict of interest


Linked article: apnews.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Fired for being unvaccinated in NYC? Don't count on unemployment benefits. In related news, Staten Island's local economy to collapse


Linked article: silive.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Suspect in the murder of journalist Jamal Khashoggi arrested in Paris; story still coming together


Linked article: bbc.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Many, many days late, the National Baseball Hall of Fame is no longer a Buck short


Linked article: fox4kc.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Thousands without pow


Linked article: news.yahoo.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Two local residents who went maskless at zoo test positive for COVID-19 after showing symptoms, ask for privacy citing HIPPO regulations


Linked article: cnn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:50 PM  
Crypto lord gets f*cked by a dildo


Linked article: twitter.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
The COVID-19 vaccination map looks almost exactly like the 2020 election map, which I guess means that we can just overturn the entire pandemic with a few strategically placed lawsuits of questionable validity


Linked article: cnn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
If taking ivermectin isn't risky enough, COVID deniers must now confront counterfeit ivermectin. How will they be able to tell?


Linked article: abc.net.au
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Ghilty


Linked article: bbc.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Much like Calvin's dad taught us how they determine the weight limit on a bridge, we now know that lake ice is safe for 11 elk


Linked article: mlive.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Mississippians Miss Miss Mississippi


Linked article: wlbt.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Stephen Miller claims he's experienced difficulty obtaining baby items, mostly their arms and legs


Linked article: twitter.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Meghan Markle could be deposed in Prince Andrew suit. She must really love cosplay


Linked article: nypost.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:51 PM  
Military tests Solid State Laser weapon, misses a golden opportunity by failing to fill house with popcorn first


Linked article: gizmodo.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Not to be anal, but yes, tildes are important


Linked article: twitter.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Burned camper found in burned camper


Linked article: dailyinterlake.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Does the Pope know about this?


Linked article: twitter.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Photographer tracks down subjects he photographed over 40 years later to recreate the scenes. Story developing


Linked article: diyphotography.net
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Each and every day woman has an unpleasant experience and still manages to enjoy being 107 years old


Linked article: amp.usatoday.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Man shot his way into pharmacy, stole medication. Police have provided a pic in the article. So if you are in Pennsylvania and see someone in a Steelers hat breathing out of their mouth, THAT'S THE GUY


Linked article: wjactv.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:52 PM  
Indiana State Police seeking information on catfishing suspect in relation to Delphi murders. Suspect was arrested in 2020, but to be fair the mugshot was still printing out


Linked article: fox59.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
Bread lines grow in Turkey as inflation soars. See, that's why you cook the dressing outside of the bird, people


Linked article: aljazeera.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
Not to preach, but Moderna says we're living in a material world and if you've been touched by a variant for the very first time, you should get this booster shot


Linked article: cnn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
Reggie Jackson arrested at Windsor Castle


Linked article: theguardian.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
All around me are redacted faces. Federal places, blurred out faces. Bright and early for their court room races. Going nowhere, maybe prison


Linked article: cnn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
Conservative politician calls on us to stop stigmatizing whiny, selfish, ignorant, stupid chickenshiat crybaby bastards who stupidly remain unvaccinated


Linked article: regina.ctvnews.ca
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
German man performing castrations on eight men lied about being medically trained. His only reference was getting someone unstuck from a chair with slightly spaced out planks


Linked article: theguardian.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:53 PM  
"You look so beautiful in the moonlight," he said at 4:15 p.m


Linked article: mcsweeneys.net
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
In the Falklands, they close down the street if you want to have sex. OH, just if you are a sea lion


Linked article: dailymail.co.uk
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
John Madden has passed away. He will be buried in a casket, in a chicken, in a duck, in a turkey


Linked article: sports.yahoo.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
Tomorrow morning, Athens will awaken to new COVID-19 measures. But then, dawn has always been tough on Greece


Linked article: greekcitytimes.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
♫Deck the halls with boughs of holly, ♫Fa la la la la la la ♫ Tis the season to be jolly Fa La *Twang* la AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


Linked article: abcnews.go.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
Two Christian congregations meet in parking lot to determine who God loves more, ignoring overwhelming recent evidence that God hates both of them


Linked article: foxnews.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
First there was the Great Maple Syrup Theft. Now there's the Christmas Butter Heist. In other news: Security tightened on pancake mix deliveries


Linked article: ottawa.ctvnews.ca
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
You better watch out. I said, YOU BETTER WATCH OUT


Linked article: twitter.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:54 PM  
Man arrested for threatening people with a gun in a bowling alley. Shortly after screaming, "Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one around here who gives a shiat about the rules? Mark it ZERO"


Linked article: wearecentralpa.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:55 PM  
Damn near killed him


Linked article: dailymail.co.uk
 
2022-01-13 3:33:55 PM  
Huge outpouring of care and concern after tornados kill almost as many Kentuckians in a single day as COVID has been killing each day for three months


Linked article: kentucky.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:55 PM  
Religion is much like a penis. It's cool to have it and take joy in wielding it, but when you go out and throw in people's faces and put others in danger, it becomes a problem for the rest of us


Linked article: npr.org
 
2022-01-13 3:33:55 PM  
Missionary position in Haiti improves


Linked article: cnn.com
 
2022-01-13 3:33:55 PM  
Waking up right after drifting off to sleep can boost creativity, especially if you're in the fast lane on the 405 freeway


Linked article: science.org
 
2022-01-17 11:47:09 AM  

Moderator: Welcome to Fark's Headline of the Month Voting for December 2021!

Great Fark headlines take all forms! Puns, wordplay, fun obscure references, visual, lyrics or verse, context - like buried lede and plot twist (click through to read the story to figure out the joke - these are often some of the best), and just damn clever or a sideways look at the story or the world.

Take the time to read and laugh. Then vote!

Vote for any or all! We don't limit your voting, we really want to see what you laughed at and enjoyed!

Voting starts Thursday, January 13 and ends Monday, January 17, 4pm Eastern.

Vote, vote, vote, and let's see what you love best for December 2021 Headlines of the Month!


Are the voting machines going to impounded after the voting? Are Cyber Ninjas going to test the voting machines? Asking for a farking friend.
 
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