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(Slate)   "How do I help my teen whose friends have ghosted her?"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Secondary school, High school, Girl, Family, Daughter, 13-year-old, s birthday party, social life  
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392 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 15 Dec 2021 at 5:17 AM (23 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



26 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-12-15 1:29:54 AM  
Take away her phone and get her a job a Domino's, where all the pot smoking kids work.
 
2021-12-15 4:17:40 AM  

solokumba: Take away her phone and get her a job a Domino's, where all the pot smoking kids work.


Lulz....at 13?
 
2021-12-15 4:35:18 AM  
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...butt stuff?
 
2021-12-15 5:22:43 AM  
Get her into some sort of extracurricular activity. Martial arts is an old reliable one. Debate club? Some school-sponsored sports?

Kids can be assholes, so it's better to be active in a few different things to keep as wide of a social network as possible.
 
2021-12-15 5:27:37 AM  
maybe it's time to hang with a new crowd. or new parents.
 
2021-12-15 5:52:03 AM  
At some point those girls will realize that they aren't going to be able to move to the tier one social status, but it won't be before they have eaten their own. Tell her to enjoy watching them making themselves miserable trying to achieve an impossible goal.
You don't get to most popular by alienating friends, we all need our dorky awkward wingmen.
 
2021-12-15 5:52:33 AM  
One, no kid will ever tell you everything about their social life. Two, you should have told them long ago that things like this will happen all through life for seemingly no reason at all. Three, be the adult and ask the other parents if they have heard anything but keep the asking away from the kid
 
433 [TotalFark]
2021-12-15 6:57:16 AM  
Remind her that the universe is unfair and we will all live meaningless lives and will die loved by others who will also die.  Take her out to the woods and make her kill a deer, go to the Gap for some jeans, and press her belief in the triune god.  No teenager is exempt from the unfairness that permeates our existence and make her know that when she can't find her size in denim.
 
2021-12-15 6:59:48 AM  
Then they were never friends, if she hasn't realized this already then she will soon.  Stay out of it
 
2021-12-15 7:05:55 AM  
Make fake social media accounts in the name of her friends. Pretend to be them and rekindle their friendships. Have endless excuses about why they won't talk to her in person or ever hang out.

Maintain this until she's 30 or you die.
 
2021-12-15 7:08:01 AM  
Give her a power pill so she can go wocka wocka wocka on them
 
2021-12-15 7:27:50 AM  

EvilEgg: At some point those girls will realize that they aren't going to be able to move to the tier one social status, but it won't be before they have eaten their own. Tell her to enjoy watching them making themselves miserable trying to achieve an impossible goal.
You don't get to most popular by alienating friends, we all need our dorky awkward wingmen.


As a dorky, awkward wingman I can attest: you are correct.
 
2021-12-15 7:33:56 AM  
The whole rocket can't reach space, rockets must shed the boosters.  Your child was helpful to the crowd in the beginning, but now is just so much useless ungainly dead weight.

Get her a cat and a book for poetry.  Tell her to start going to the local comic shop where she will be worshiped.
 
2021-12-15 8:00:06 AM  
I can see where this is going.

Her old circle of friends are trying to hang with the "cool kids," huh?  How long until these kids are initiated?  I.e., the "cool kids" have them prove themselves by doing something horrible to this girl, like spread rumors on social media?

Ghosting is only the start of the bullshiat.  I give it 2 weeks.
 
2021-12-15 8:04:13 AM  
Addendum:  your daughter needs to get out in front of this.  She needs to learn all the mean girl tricks and draw first blood, and it has to be devastating.  At the very least, she has to be ready to retaliate with the nuclear option.  Actually, the latter option might be a better approach, so it's less likely she looks like the asshole when the time comes.

Also, buy her a copy of Machiavelli's The Prince.

OK, off to get more coffee!
 
2021-12-15 8:24:11 AM  
The lesson she needs to take away from this is that most humans aren't worth the air they breathe.
 
2021-12-15 8:42:03 AM  
Tell her people change sometimes as they get older. She's done nothing wrong and it's not her fault. Then get her some ice cream. Then see about other activities she can join(sports, computers, whatever hobbies/interests she has). She'll have something to enjoy and maybe make some new friends with shared interests.
 
2021-12-15 8:46:08 AM  
Tell her to sit back and wait a week or so.  One or two will probably drift back, if she's not pushy.  Especially if she gets involved in something noteworthy.  If she likes animals, find a animal rescue that needs willing hands.  If sports are her thing, find a chapter of the Special Olympics that needs unifying partners.  If she's shy, look for a food pantry that needs someone to sort cans in the back.  She'll have something new in her life that absolutely adores her and that's the greatest feeling in the world to a teen.
 
2021-12-15 10:27:26 AM  
Been going through this with our teen girl, and it sucks. Friends just dropped her over the course of a year. She's in a lot of things at school, and these friends are in them as well. It's one or two new girls in the friend group that turned the others against her as they joined. Not sure what happened and can do nothing but comfort her.

It's hard. Girls are mean. She will graduate this year and this will pass.
 
2021-12-15 10:52:24 AM  
Turn the friends into real ghosts.
 
2021-12-15 11:20:00 AM  
Farkers, I am disappoint.

F*CK THEIR DADS, YOU IDIOT WOMAN!

Sheesh.
 
2021-12-15 11:20:29 AM  

xanadian: Addendum:  your daughter needs to get out in front of this.  She needs to learn all the mean girl tricks and draw first blood, and it has to be devastating.  At the very least, she has to be ready to retaliate with the nuclear option.  Actually, the latter option might be a better approach, so it's less likely she looks like the asshole when the time comes.

Also, buy her a copy of Machiavelli's The Prince.

OK, off to get more coffee!


Why not just rent a copy of Mean Girls?
 
2021-12-15 11:21:43 AM  

MechaPyx: Tell her people change sometimes as they get older. She's done nothing wrong and it's not her fault. Then get her some ice cream. Then see about other activities she can join(sports, computers, whatever hobbies/interests she has). She'll have something to enjoy and maybe make some new friends with shared interests.


If she volunteers somewhere, she'll immediately be treated like a star in her own right.
 
2021-12-15 11:24:42 AM  

433: Remind her that the universe is unfair and we will all live meaningless lives and will die loved by others who will also die.  Take her out to the woods and make her kill a deer, go to the Gap for some jeans, and press her belief in the triune god.  No teenager is exempt from the unfairness that permeates our existence and make her know that when she can't find her size in denim.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-12-15 11:55:14 AM  
Ah, fond similar memories.

It really is too bad that as kids we have to learn what "work friends" are when we assume and are told that your childhood friends are for life, or some drek.

Makes for a lonely existence if you are not on the social ladder. It is a tough lesson, and often seems like a lopsided thing to have to deal with while others get to keep on living that storybook social circle.
 
2021-12-15 12:12:24 PM  
Tell her not to be so farking awkward bud.
 
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