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(CNN)   I would have liked to have seen Montana   (cnn.com) divider line
    More: Sad, Endangered species, Grizzly Bear, Montana, Biodiversity, Contiguous United States, Mainland, United States territory, Endangered Species Act  
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5473 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Dec 2021 at 1:41 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-12-08 9:51:57 PM  
This is a move to let Americans dream of hunting grizzly bears.  That's the only motive I can think of for circulating this story, given the fact that Montana is a hoax.
 
2021-12-08 10:34:17 PM  
I have no problem ad long as you do it bear-handed.

No knife, no gun.

Show me you're a man, big boy.
 
2021-12-08 11:09:55 PM  
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Great, now BEARS are submitting headlines to Fark.
 
2021-12-08 11:44:56 PM  

Somacandra: [Fark user image image 243x750]

Great, now BEARS are submitting headlines to Fark.


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2021-12-08 11:57:08 PM  
I was just in Montana. I didn't remember it being that depressing when I was young... ?

You guys have fun. I'm gonna leave the apex monsters alone.

/maybe i just watched The Revenant too many times
 
2021-12-09 12:58:52 AM  
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2021-12-09 1:45:28 AM  
Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.
 
2021-12-09 1:47:58 AM  

Loucifer: Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.


Same.

/Who said anything about sabotage?
//CAPTAIN!
 
2021-12-09 1:57:33 AM  
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2021-12-09 2:17:24 AM  
Just when you think Gianforte couldn't possibly be a worse person, he digs deeps and surprises you.
 
2021-12-09 2:18:13 AM  
If they really want to hunt bears so badly, they should let the population grow some more so they don't have to wait fifty years between hunting seasons again.
 
2021-12-09 2:25:44 AM  
Those rugged Montanan snowflakes can't handle a few oversized fur babies?

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2021-12-09 2:31:54 AM  

Pfighting Polish: Loucifer: Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.

Same.

/Who said anything about sabotage?
//CAPTAIN!


I can't stand it
I know ye planned it
 
2021-12-09 2:40:56 AM  
The Constitution protects the right to bear arms. Let them fight the bears with their arms
 
2021-12-09 2:43:11 AM  
Can we feed Jon Tester to the grizzlies?
 
2021-12-09 2:48:33 AM  

Pfighting Polish: Loucifer: Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.

Same.

/Who said anything about sabotage?
//CAPTAIN!


Also had a brief panic attack about this
 
2021-12-09 2:56:13 AM  
One bear. One bear only, please.
 
2021-12-09 3:00:31 AM  

Kris_Romm: Can we feed Jon Tester to the grizzlies?


6 month old account with 138 greens huh?

/GFY
 
2021-12-09 3:05:05 AM  
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2021-12-09 3:26:40 AM  
What the fark has gone wrong with your life that you're living in Montana?
That right there, you're disqualified from having an opinion on hunting bears.
It's Montana. You're sick of bears? Look for the exits.
 
2021-12-09 3:42:51 AM  

NINEv2: Kris_Romm: Can we feed Jon Tester to the grizzlies?

6 month old account with 138 greens huh?

/GFY


Booooo!   I'm the boogeyman.
 
2021-12-09 4:17:34 AM  
Montana's governor is a literal thug who physically assaulted a reporter because he didn't like a question.  Fark him.
 
2021-12-09 4:35:01 AM  

Kris_Romm: I'm the boogeyman.


Zombie.
 
2021-12-09 4:39:09 AM  
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2021-12-09 5:36:15 AM  
Really ought to let the bears recover to the population they had before man started killing them.  That should make everyone happy.  You could then hunt them from your front room.
 
2021-12-09 6:23:23 AM  

Naido: This is a move to let Americans dream of hunting grizzly bears.  That's the only motive I can think of for circulating this story, given the fact that Montana is a hoax.


People are saying "there is no Arizona" as well.
 
2021-12-09 6:44:18 AM  

vudukungfu: I have no problem ad long as you do it bear-handed.

No knife, no gun.

Show me you're a man, big boy.


Davy Crockett grinned a bear down when he was 3 years old. Why would you think that tough Montanans would even think they need a gun? This is silly.
 
2021-12-09 6:47:07 AM  
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2021-12-09 7:19:00 AM  
'FWS back in March, in 1975 the population of bears in the Lower 48 was between 700 and 800. Now, in the NCDE alone, there are nearly 1,100, state officials said.'

So there's a maximum of 400 more bears in 46 years.  It's shootin' time.
Now I have a headache.
 
2021-12-09 7:38:19 AM  
They are scary bastards. I only encountered one when I lived in Montana. Cabin out in the woods, stepped outside to smoke. And 7+ feet of apex predator was right there maybe 6 feet away on its hind feet.

I somehow got the door open without looking backwards. Stumbled in, fell, kicked the door shut. Shakily made my way to the kitchen and poured a tall glass of huckleberry vodka.

I've seen black bears and stuff, no problem, but grizzly is farking scary..

Met a couple people who had been mauled and lived to tell the tale, one had his claw marks inked after to really show it off, hell I'd be proud too if I survived that.
 
2021-12-09 7:50:03 AM  
Maybe there is another side to the story.

Most of you have not lived in grizzly country- I spent 3 years there. You can't take your kids on hikes. Hiking alone I was always searching for clearings with good to great sight lines. Many incidents came out each year like the 4 hunters on horseback with an elk kill who were chased down. Out in the flats near my house in Cody one of the town doc's and I were going to hike out to an ancient cabin and came within 300' of a juvenile male +/- 600 pounds. We walked backward for hundreds of feet to the shelter of the car.

They are huge and can run faster than most things alive. They are farking crazy and go from friendly waving animal to kill your ass in seconds. Not something to be trusted and that is why man hunted them to near extinction. Brown bears also are a lot bigger than black bears so don't believe comparisons.

Hiking in the Big Horns was a pleasure (griz free), hiking in the Absarokas was thought provoking. Good luck with the can of spray...
 
2021-12-09 7:51:48 AM  
Grizzly bears wake up pissed off. I'm not going to make it worse by putting a bullet in one's ass. The damn thing would rape me, upload the video to Instagram, then eat me alive.
 
2021-12-09 8:31:05 AM  

ranchguy: Hiking in the Big Horns was a pleasure (griz free), hiking in the Absarokas was thought provoking. Good luck with the can of spray...


One of my coworkers goes deer hunting for a week in Maine every year.

As part of his prep, he gets a bear permit so he won't get in trouble on the off chance he has to shoot one in self-defense.
 
2021-12-09 8:44:59 AM  
Conflict bears? Are they like giant, furry diamonds that want to eat you?
 
2021-12-09 9:28:58 AM  
Obligatory
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2021-12-09 9:29:35 AM  
Montana is the only place I've seen a bear in the wild. I was out enjoying the sunrise and having my morning coffee in an elevated tree porch/observation deck kind of thingamabob and got so excited I grabbed my camera, ran down the stairs, and started running after it.  I got about 100 yards until it struck me.

I'M RUNNING IN PURSUIT OF AN ANIMAL THAT COULD TEAR ME IN HALF IF IT SO WISHED.  Thankfully it was a black bear that was as scared of me as I probably should have been of it, so it outsprinted me.

That's my one bear in Montana story, I hope you enjoyed it.
 
2021-12-09 9:47:10 AM  
There is only a limited number of apex predators that an area can sustain. Once they start out pacing that number they start to become nescience animals. Most DNRs will capture tag and release a bear once and after that if it shows up around people again they put it down. End result is the same.
I've always been a hunter and subscribe to the Native American thoughts on hunting, that being use every part of any animal you harvest that you can. Tendons can be used to stitch together leather for knife sheaths, meat for food, etc. Not sure i would ever tackle a Griz but as long as the hunts are well controlled and huge oversite is adhered to, the bear population should sustain it just fine. There has been a black bear season for as long as I can remember and those damned things just keep the population growing.
Apparently the bear farker does not need assistance.
 
2021-12-09 9:51:02 AM  

Chevello: Conflict bears? Are they like giant, furry diamonds that want to eat you?


They're a conflict for the precious ranchers, who rule over the land and can't stand it that their stupid, slow, fat, herd animals can't compete with a real wild animal. This is an insult to their manhood. Just like everything else, if they aren't running it over.
 
2021-12-09 9:56:39 AM  

TTFK: ranchguy: Hiking in the Big Horns was a pleasure (griz free), hiking in the Absarokas was thought provoking. Good luck with the can of spray...

One of my coworkers goes deer hunting for a week in Maine every year.

As part of his prep, he gets a bear permit so he won't get in trouble on the off chance he has to shoot one in self-defense.



There are no grizzly bears in Maine, only black bears.

East coast black bears (i.e. ones that don't have to compete with grizzlies) are big pussy cats, 9 times out of 10 when you see them, you just see their butts hauling ass away from you.

I used to trap, tag and relocate problem bears... you haven't lived until you are holding a half drugged up boar bear by the armpits, gazing into his blinking eye from only inches away while smelling his rotten breath... I have accidentally separated mommas from their cubs, I have surprised 450lb dumpster divers, I've had them stick their nose up under my hammock and snort me awake...

...your friend has almost no reason to worry.
 
2021-12-09 10:06:52 AM  

MIRV888: 'FWS back in March, in 1975 the population of bears in the Lower 48 was between 700 and 800. Now, in the NCDE alone, there are nearly 1,100, state officials said.'

So there's a maximum of 400 more bears in 46 years.  It's shootin' time.
Now I have a headache.


No.  In 1975 there were 700-800 bears in the ENTIRE LOWER 48 STATES.  Now there are 1100 bears in the Northern Continental Divide Ecosystem, which measures 16,000 square miles.  While 16,000 square miles might seem huge to you the Lower 48 measures 3,119,885 square miles, so just a little bit larger.
 
2021-12-09 10:24:21 AM  

Loucifer: Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.


I'm not sure I even knew Sam Neil was still alive.
 
2021-12-09 1:34:17 PM  

ToughActinProlactin: Loucifer: Jesus. I thought the headline was about Sam Neil dying. I am so relieved.

I'm not sure I even knew Sam Neil was still alive.


The Velociraptor didn't get him yet.
 
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