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(Slate)   "My husband and I cannot agree on what to name our forthcoming child. It's impossible to reach any kind of nomenclature impasse. What do we do?"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Need, Family, WANT, family doctor, family member, second time, firstborn son, need of play  
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332 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 06 Dec 2021 at 10:50 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-12-06 9:50:54 AM  
Taint McGillicutty is a good name.
 
2021-12-06 9:52:06 AM  
Get out while you can, both of you. If you're arguing about something like that, it's all downhill from here.

Bet you wish you'd just stuck with butt stuff instead of getting knocked up, am I right?
 
2021-12-06 10:10:30 AM  
Look up what "impasse" means?
 
2021-12-06 10:20:27 AM  
let the internet name it. That has never gone wrong before.

also +1 for you should have done butt stuff and you wouldn't be in this pickle.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2021-12-06 10:31:42 AM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-12-06 10:45:31 AM  

khitsicker: let the internet name it. That has never gone wrong before.

also +1 for you should have done butt stuff and you wouldn't be in this pickle.


Better a pickle in the butt than having one's butt in this pickle.
 
2021-12-06 10:54:21 AM  
Get an abortion because you are clearly too mentally immature to raise a child.
 
2021-12-06 11:07:44 AM  
Cut the child in half and each of you can name your half whatever you want.
 
2021-12-06 11:09:06 AM  
Compromise possibility Slate writer didn't mention.

Make the father's first name the son's middle name.
 
2021-12-06 11:12:49 AM  
I mean, it's obvious, right?

Cloning trope.
 
2021-12-06 11:16:40 AM  
The greatest names are in the Western Hockey League Bantam Draft.  These are the names of 14 year olds in Western Canada.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-12-06 11:18:42 AM  
My neighbors just had a son they named Lennox.  At the neighborhood get together yesterday, I stated that I thought it was cool because it reminds me of Lennox Lewis.  Nobody knew who I was talking about.  Boxing ain't what it used to be.
 
2021-12-06 11:19:09 AM  

Cultured: Look up what "impasse" means?


Tyrion Lannister's butt?
 
2021-12-06 11:19:33 AM  
Simple, call it "insert name here".
 
2021-12-06 11:23:41 AM  
"Just give a random alphanumeric string!"

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-12-06 11:24:54 AM  

Rapmaster2000: My neighbors just had a son they named Lennox.  At the neighborhood get together yesterday, I stated that I thought it was cool because it reminds me of Lennox Lewis.  Nobody knew who I was talking about.  Boxing ain't what it used to be.


It instantly made me think of central air.
 
2021-12-06 11:32:07 AM  
7
 
2021-12-06 11:35:04 AM  
Corporate sponsorship.
 
2021-12-06 11:42:44 AM  

Billy Liar: Corporate sponsorship.


I like this -

"Hi Steve, meet my son! His name is Corporate Sponsorship McDouchnozzle, but we call him 'Corp-Spo' for short! Say 'hi!' to Steve, Corpsy!"
 
2021-12-06 11:48:17 AM  
Name it after a fungus , like "Ergot" or a squid  "Dosidicus gigas"
 
2021-12-06 11:59:42 AM  
In some states, only the mother signs the birth certificate, which is an easy way to solve this problem.
 
2021-12-06 12:07:28 PM  

Rapmaster2000: My neighbors just had a son they named Lennox.  At the neighborhood get together yesterday, I stated that I thought it was cool because it reminds me of Lennox Lewis.  Nobody knew who I was talking about.  Boxing ain't what it used to be.


HVAC installation and repair is a good trade to be in.

resources.lennox.comView Full Size
 
2021-12-06 12:25:44 PM  
Bobby Drop Tables?
 
2021-12-06 12:31:59 PM  
Wow. Y'all really don't belong together.
 
2021-12-06 12:33:33 PM  

phenn: Wow. Y'all really don't belong together.


Shush! With them being mutual douchebags to each other, none of the rest of us has to worry about dealing with them.
 
2021-12-06 12:37:22 PM  
There is a Garrison Keillor character named Senator. I suggest that to friends when they ask for ideas. So far none have done it, but i think it would be cool.
 
2021-12-06 12:38:35 PM  
Asswipe. Pronounced ossweepay
 
2021-12-06 12:39:33 PM  

Rapmaster2000: My neighbors just had a son they named Lennox.  At the neighborhood get together yesterday, I stated that I thought it was cool because it reminds me of Lennox Lewis.  Nobody knew who I was talking about.  Boxing ain't what it used to be.


Annie Lennox agrees. 
In fact, she said:

Travel the world and the seven seas?
Everybody's looking for something.
But boxing ain't what it used to be.
Nobody's looking for boxing.
 
2021-12-06 12:40:54 PM  
"6/7 eighths"
"You named your kid 6/7eights?"
"We picked his name out of a hat"
 
2021-12-06 12:43:49 PM  

phenn: Wow. Y'all really don't belong together.


Well maybe. But that's why they are having a kid, it will fix all their relationship problems overnight. They will be closer than ever, I'm sure.
 
2021-12-06 12:50:38 PM  
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


/also how the kid was conceived
 
2021-12-06 1:46:36 PM  
Louis CK - Kids Names
Youtube WNSf-KQORRk
 
2021-12-06 3:00:09 PM  
She already changed her last name to his, and now hubby is pushing to get  naming rights over their first born too?   Rem - he found out on the first day they met that she doesn't believe in saddling any kid w/ 'Dad's name plus #'?

Gee, what a lovely husband.

/ don't be shocked when kiddo changes his name to Dweezil the day he turns 18.
// kid might apply for a name change as a minor, citing unnecessary hassle etc.
 
2021-12-06 3:01:11 PM  
Have these two been dropped on their heads? Legally name him James III and call him something else. My mother was pregnant with my brother while her father was dying. His name was Henry Joseph. My parents named my brother in his honor, but except for signing legal documents and during arguments with my SIL, when he is called "Henrrrrrryyy," he goes by "Joe" or "Joseph." Problem solved.
 
2021-12-06 3:05:35 PM  
"Everyone, this is our child Buttstuff Jones"
 
2021-12-06 3:11:14 PM  
Mrs. Knife and I had this problem with our second child.  Our solution was for each of us to generate preference lists of 50, and awarding points to names based on wherever they landed on our list(s).  Name A for example, would earn 50 points for being #1 on her list, and 32 points for being #18 on mine.

We each generated lists of 50 names each.  Exactly one name appeared on both lists, which for us solved it.
 
2021-12-06 3:23:22 PM  
Actually RTFA now...  yeah, subby, what the story is doesn't match your headline by a long shot.

This is an instance where the father wants his son tagged "III."  The father and mother had apparently discussed this, at length, in the past; she doesn't want to do it, he does.  And he apparently has far, far more of an emotional investment in the decision than she does.

Just name the damned kid "III" and give him a nickname.  Because otherwise, you honestly have a divorce court in your future over this; you just don't realize it.
 
2021-12-06 4:07:36 PM  

mactheknife: Actually RTFA now...  yeah, subby, what the story is doesn't match your headline by a long shot.

This is an instance where the father wants his son tagged "III."  The father and mother had apparently discussed this, at length, in the past; she doesn't want to do it, he does.  And he apparently has far, far more of an emotional investment in the decision than she does.

Just name the damned kid "III" and give him a nickname.  Because otherwise, you honestly have a divorce court in your future over this; you just don't realize it.


Call the kid "Ay Ay Ay!"
 
2021-12-06 4:07:37 PM  
Go to your local amusement park.  Go to the souvenir shop, find the license plates with names.  Buy one of each name.  Put them all in a bag.  Pull one out.  THAT is the name, and spelling, that you use.
 
2021-12-06 4:10:13 PM  

mactheknife: Just name the damned kid "III" and give him a nickname.


If he's white and in the south, that nickname will be "Trey"
 
2021-12-06 5:11:52 PM  
Anyone suggest "Weedlord Bonerhitler" yet?
 
2021-12-06 8:20:27 PM  
They can have mine. I rarely use it.
 
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