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(Edmonton Journal)   Gimme a large fentanyl pizza with extra meth   (edmontonjournal.com) divider line
    More: Stupid, Crime, grams of fentanyl, Drug addiction, Drugs, grams of meth, Arrest, Drug injection, email notifications  
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2795 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Nov 2021 at 5:50 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



44 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-11-29 5:53:36 PM  
Gee, I wonder how the fentanyl got to Edmonton?
 
2021-11-29 5:55:19 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


I actually wanted extra anchovies, though...
 
433 [TotalFark]
2021-11-29 5:55:39 PM  

KCinPA: Gee, I wonder how the fentanyl got to Edmonton?


They called in for delivery.
 
2021-11-29 5:57:26 PM  
Is that a premium topping?
 
2021-11-29 5:57:30 PM  
No pineapple, WTF eh
 
2021-11-29 6:05:59 PM  
I was about to call BS on the cop math, but a quarter kilo of fentanyl probably is worth about that much.
 
2021-11-29 6:08:00 PM  
And we're arguing about pineapple.
 
2021-11-29 6:08:39 PM  
But how was their pizza?
 
2021-11-29 6:15:56 PM  
Wait, I can get a fentanyl pizza? Why has no one told me this before?
 
2021-11-29 6:17:54 PM  

palelizard: Wait, I can get a fentanyl pizza? Why has no one told me this before?


Go into nearly any pizza shop and wink when you ask for extra anchovies. 9 times out of 10 you will get drugs.
 
2021-11-29 6:19:14 PM  
Worst. Meal Replacement Plan. Ever.
 
151 [OhFark]
2021-11-29 6:26:54 PM  
Is tin foil a common container for fentanyl? That picture made me think they were trying to sell, breadsticks or something
 
2021-11-29 6:27:08 PM  
Give me a deep dish of that!
 
2021-11-29 6:30:35 PM  
Morons.  You sell 'shrooms out of a pizza joint.  That way you have plausible deniability:


"See, Officer...no drugs here, just pizza toppings."
 
2021-11-29 6:34:02 PM  
Who ordered the fentanyl pizza with extra meth?
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-29 6:38:18 PM  

hugram: Who ordered the fentanyl pizza with extra meth?
[Fark user image image 650x356]


Cuomo?
 
2021-11-29 6:38:21 PM  
It's not delivery, it's the DEA.

Or whatever they have in Canada.
 
433 [TotalFark]
2021-11-29 6:51:05 PM  

JustLookin: It's not delivery, it's the DEA.

Or whatever they have in Canada.


The DE Eh.
 
2021-11-29 7:01:19 PM  
Apparently there are 2 pizza places in that neighborhood widely known to sell narcotics and stimulants. The cops only need to read Twitter to know this.
 
2021-11-29 7:02:57 PM  
Yeah, no surprises.

Friend of mine worked in the kitchen at a Boston Pizza where the owner was using it for money laundering. Cash businesses can hide a lot of activity.
 
2021-11-29 7:16:11 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Must be the place. Donair, pizza, and hard drugs.
 
2021-11-29 7:23:51 PM  
Anytime a convenience store worker asks me if I need a bag I ask "Y'all sell that too?"
 
2021-11-29 7:36:05 PM  

Breaker Moran: [Fark user image 422x750]
Must be the place. Donair, pizza, and hard drugs.


Definitely not reassured by their menu URL....
 
2021-11-29 7:46:01 PM  

ocelot: Anytime a convenience store worker asks me if I need a bag I ask "Y'all sell that too?"


I'm stealing that one.
 
2021-11-29 7:49:44 PM  
The Sopranos - Crime Scene Pizza
Youtube nhEUsKak8Dc
 
2021-11-29 7:54:05 PM  

robodog: I was about to call BS on the cop math, but a quarter kilo of fentanyl probably is worth about that much.


I doubt that they'd wrap pure fentanyl in crunched up aluminum like leftovers.
 
2021-11-29 7:55:47 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-29 8:20:49 PM  
Fentanyl and meth on pizza is fine, but don't even think about putting crack on a pizza. Worse than pineapple.

Also, for a fentanyl and meth pizza, you're going to want to order thin crust. Fentanyl and meth are appetite suppressants, so a thin crust is plenty.
 
2021-11-29 8:24:27 PM  

phishrace: Fentanyl and meth on pizza is fine, but don't even think about putting crack on a pizza. Worse than pineapple.

Also, for a fentanyl and meth pizza, you're going to want to order thin crust. Fentanyl and meth are appetite suppressants, so a thin crust is plenty.


Unless it has marijuana too. Then you gotta go deep dish.
 
2021-11-29 8:33:36 PM  
Deep dish pizza SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS!
 
2021-11-29 8:46:07 PM  
I had occasional suspicions that some of the Turkish pizza shop owners in Western PA were not always selling pizza for profit.  Good way to deliver and launder.
 
2021-11-29 8:48:34 PM  

Spice Must Flow: ocelot: Anytime a convenience store worker asks me if I need a bag I ask "Y'all sell that too?"

I'm stealing that one.


"Just a couple joints" works as well
 
2021-11-29 8:48:38 PM  

jim32rr: No pineapple, WTF eh


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-29 8:50:55 PM  
Extra meth. And cocaine on half.
 
2021-11-29 8:51:33 PM  
Photo caption: The Edmonton Police Service has charged two Edmonton men for selling fentanyl and meth at a pizza restaurant in central Edmonton. More than $60,000 in cash and drugs were seized.

Opening paragraph: Police have charged the two owners of a north Edmonton pizza restaurant for selling two illegal toppings - meth and fentanyl.

Must be a food truck.
 
TWX
2021-11-29 9:03:13 PM  
I remember an article about a Church's Chicken that had drugs (meth?) dealt through the drivethrough, supposedly the code-word was to ask for extra biscuits.  Stupidest code-word ever.
 
2021-11-29 9:47:14 PM  

TWX: I remember an article about a Church's Chicken that had drugs (meth?) dealt through the drivethrough, supposedly the code-word was to ask for extra biscuits.  Stupidest code-word ever.


Some comedian did a bit about it 30 years ago and ever since then I swear it's real bro, my cousins friends uncle from (semi-nearby big city) totally worked there when it happened, for real bro.
 
2021-11-29 10:11:46 PM  

Uzzah: [Fark user image image 661x1024]

I actually wanted extra anchovies, though...


Well, that is McDreamy, after all.
He aged well.
 
2021-11-29 10:22:39 PM  
On their defense fentynol does sound a lot like fennel! Maybe they were just confused from all the meth.
 
TWX
2021-11-29 10:41:41 PM  

One Size Fits Some: TWX: I remember an article about a Church's Chicken that had drugs (meth?) dealt through the drivethrough, supposedly the code-word was to ask for extra biscuits.  Stupidest code-word ever.

Some comedian did a bit about it 30 years ago and ever since then I swear it's real bro, my cousins friends uncle from (semi-nearby big city) totally worked there when it happened, for real bro.


I read this in Seth Meyers' voice from his parody movie trailer Boston Accent:

Boston Accent Trailer - Late Night with Seth Meyers
Youtube rLwbzGyC6t4
 
2021-11-29 10:48:35 PM  

Tracianne: jim32rr: No pineapple, WTF eh

[Fark user image 466x700]


The mods should give you a week off for posting such filth.
 
TWX
2021-11-29 11:36:45 PM  

Russ1642: Tracianne: jim32rr: No pineapple, WTF eh

[Fark user image 466x700]

The mods should give you a week off for posting such filth.


At least there's no ham on it.
 
2021-11-29 11:56:44 PM  
How many slices of mushroom pizza does it take to make things interesting?
 
2021-11-30 12:57:59 AM  
Wait, they weren't selling marijuana also?  I've been assured that legalizing marijuana only emboldens the dealers and makes the black market even worse.  Canada has legalized marijuana so shouldn't these guys have been pushing the devil's lettuce too?
 
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