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(Yahoo)   Woman smuggles tiny stowaway aboard Delta flight, gets found out halfway through the flight   (yahoo.com) divider line
    More: Sappy, Pediatrics, Infant, Childbirth, Intensive care medicine, Lavinia Mounga, medical emergency, Pregnancy, Delta flight  
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6190 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Nov 2021 at 11:20 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



30 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-11-25 11:23:08 PM  
I remember that flight.  I had the lasagna.
 
2021-11-25 11:23:45 PM  
Centipedes?
 
2021-11-25 11:24:22 PM  
Where do they bury the survivors?
 
2021-11-25 11:28:51 PM  
How much was the added fee?
 
2021-11-25 11:32:55 PM  
Crying baby made it so pleasant for everyone else.
 
2021-11-25 11:38:10 PM  
I've been on flights on which there were medical emergencies.  As much as people like to refer to flight attendants as glorified waitresses. when the shiat hits the fan they really are trained to deal with it, and I have nothing but respect for them.
 
2021-11-25 11:39:45 PM  

hlehmann: I've been on flights on which there were medical emergencies.  As much as people like to refer to flight attendants as glorified waitresses. when the shiat hits the fan they really are trained to deal with it, and I have nothing but respect for them.


Check out the thread two down from this one. You just need to bring some candy for the free drinks.
 
2021-11-25 11:39:56 PM  
How did she not know she was pregnant?
 
2021-11-25 11:40:18 PM  

smokewon: How much was the added fee?


Good lord I can't imagine how this would have turned out on a Spirit Airlines flight but I'll try

'Flight attendant, I'm having real bad pain and I think I have to poop real bad'

Did you pay for the toilet upgrade?

That's a thing? No, but I really just need to lie back a bit

Our seats are pre-reclined for your convenience

This feels very inconvenient. Ok, poop is coming out

Ma'am, you just gave birth to a tiny human. We must charge you for a second ticket

Can I get the child rate?

I just checked and we don't have protocols for babies being born. Your card has just been charged for a second full price ticket

It's a baby

Do you want me to chuck it out the emergency exit?

What?? No! Can she at least sit next to me?

Yes, but that is how far the seat reclines and we will bill you for bringing on another passenger
 
2021-11-25 11:41:04 PM  
Maybe some of you wimmen Farkers can explain to us menfolk how you can be 29 weeks pregnant and not know it.  Mistake the baby kicking for that 3rd burrito you had at Chipotle? You stop having periods, but you don't bother to see a doctor? Don't notice the 20-40 lbs you put on in the past 8 months? That NONE of that shiat just happens to coincide with the night you and Cletus knocked boots, and neither of you were using protection?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt!
 
2021-11-25 11:48:06 PM  

chewynathan2: Crying baby made it so pleasant for everyone else.


When you are in a situation like that, that's the sweetest sound you've ever heard.
 
2021-11-25 11:48:24 PM  
Oh, that's going to be fun when the kid grows up and runs for President and everyone's demanding to see the birth certificate.
 
2021-11-25 11:48:27 PM  

indy_kid: Maybe some of you wimmen Farkers can explain to us menfolk how you can be 29 weeks pregnant and not know it.  Mistake the baby kicking for that 3rd burrito you had at Chipotle? You stop having periods, but you don't bother to see a doctor? Don't notice the 20-40 lbs you put on in the past 8 months? That NONE of that shiat just happens to coincide with the night you and Cletus knocked boots, and neither of you were using protection?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt!


Everyone is different and life doesn't follow a rule book
 
2021-11-25 11:50:06 PM  

indy_kid: Maybe some of you wimmen Farkers can explain to us menfolk how you can be 29 weeks pregnant and not know it.  Mistake the baby kicking for that 3rd burrito you had at Chipotle? You stop having periods, but you don't bother to see a doctor? Don't notice the 20-40 lbs you put on in the past 8 months? That NONE of that shiat just happens to coincide with the night you and Cletus knocked boots, and neither of you were using protection?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt!


oh like you've never trusted the wrong fart
 
2021-11-26 12:06:55 AM  

hlehmann: I've been on flights on which there were medical emergencies.  As much as people like to refer to flight attendants as glorified waitresses. when the shiat hits the fan they really are trained to deal with it, and I have nothing but respect for them.


Yes they are trained well.  Except in the only medical emergency I ever had on a flight it was the flight attendant that overdosed on prescription pills and alcohol.
 
2021-11-26 12:08:09 AM  
How does the paperwork regarding souls on board work here?
 
2021-11-26 12:14:35 AM  
I immediately thought "did she hide it in her ... lady place".  I guess technically I was right.
 
2021-11-26 12:26:27 AM  

Sexy Jesus: How does the paperwork regarding souls on board work here?


Children don't have souls. They have lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'... until he poops on ya. Then around 5 or 6 they're issued a soul and turn into even more of a pain in the ass.
 
2021-11-26 12:28:24 AM  
"Hawaii Pacific Health family medicine physician Dale Glenn and North Kansas City Hospital neonatal intensive care unit nurses Lani Bamfield, Amanda Beeding and Mimi Ho helped Mounga deliver her son and monitored the baby's health for several hours."

Wow! What are the chances there'd be a doctor and three neonatal intensive care nurses aboard a flight where a woman gave birth to a premature baby?
 
2021-11-26 12:32:32 AM  
Thanks for bringing us OLD ASS NEWS from May 2021 subby.
 
2021-11-26 12:40:51 AM  
So everyone on the plane got to experience the sounds and smells of birth?
 
2021-11-26 12:49:56 AM  

cheap_thoughts: Thanks for bringing us OLD ASS NEWS from May 2021 subby.


I wouldn't classify a birth as ass news.

I mean, I'm not a doctor or anything, but.
 
2021-11-26 12:54:02 AM  

starsrift: cheap_thoughts: Thanks for bringing us OLD ASS NEWS from May 2021 subby.

I wouldn't classify a birth as ass news.

I mean, I'm not a doctor or anything, but.


Old-ass news > old ass-news
 
2021-11-26 1:15:06 AM  

Tom_Slick: How did she not know she was pregnant?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-26 1:21:26 AM  

indy_kid: Maybe some of you wimmen Farkers can explain to us menfolk how you can be 29 weeks pregnant and not know it.  Mistake the baby kicking for that 3rd burrito you had at Chipotle? You stop having periods, but you don't bother to see a doctor? Don't notice the 20-40 lbs you put on in the past 8 months? That NONE of that shiat just happens to coincide with the night you and Cletus knocked boots, and neither of you were using protection?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt!


Many women don't have periods regularly or at all due to health conditions or certain types of birth control. If birth control failed for example, and the woman continues taking it and not menstruating that's normal for her.

Also, some pregnant women have 'periods'. Told not to worry about it. Very, very rarely, a woman can have more than one uterus.

With pregnancy, if the placenta is in a certain position you won't feel any kicks. Also certain women don't get much of a bump.

On the other hand, lots of non-pregnant people have a hard to get rid of tummy which developed over lockdown.

Some women are told 'they can't have children' when what is actually meant is 'a very low chance'. Same for men.

So if you have one or more of the things listed above, then voilà, surprise baby.

Given that there are millions of people pregnant at any one time, it's no surprise that every now and then there's a perfect storm = surprise baby.

Yes, there are liars, and those in denial but that's not the only possible cause of a 'surprise baby'.
 
2021-11-26 1:40:35 AM  

smokewon: How much was the added fee?


Should be a carry-on and extra seat fee. Unless they stowed it in the overhead :P
 
2021-11-26 7:23:08 AM  
Baby's stealth reached 100 long ago.
 
2021-11-26 7:32:20 AM  

cheap_thoughts: starsrift: cheap_thoughts: Thanks for bringing us OLD ASS NEWS from May 2021 subby.

I wouldn't classify a birth as ass news.

I mean, I'm not a doctor or anything, but.

Old-ass news > old ass-news


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-26 8:27:10 AM  

indy_kid: Maybe some of you wimmen Farkers can explain to us menfolk how you can be 29 weeks pregnant and not know it.  Mistake the baby kicking for that 3rd burrito you had at Chipotle? You stop having periods, but you don't bother to see a doctor? Don't notice the 20-40 lbs you put on in the past 8 months? That NONE of that shiat just happens to coincide with the night you and Cletus knocked boots, and neither of you were using protection?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt!


I have no idea but I wish that was me. I can tell within days if I'm pregnant . . . breasts hurt, things smell weird, I'm exhausted, and I want the ginger dressing from a Hibachi restaurant. A day or two later two faint lines will appear on a pregnancy test.
 
2021-11-26 11:56:23 AM  
article: ''new mother had no idea she was pregnant and gave birth at just 29 weeks,''

I hate ' woman had no idea she was pregnant! ' articles - it takes a lot of willful stupidity to get to 7 months pregnant and not know.   And we already know that we don't need any more idiots breeding.
 
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