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(Fark)   Help, my holiday gathering just turned into a full-blown shouting match regarding 1/6, CRT, LGBT...wut do?   (fark.com) divider line
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320 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 25 Nov 2021 at 4:05 AM (11 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



58 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-11-24 10:49:44 PM  
i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 11:01:03 PM  
Uodate:  smoked a bowl with aunt and now we're all watching The Good Place...progress?
 
2021-11-24 11:03:50 PM  
Dissolve them all in lye and claim it was self defense?
 
2021-11-24 11:03:52 PM  
Also note:  I did not start the debacle, I tried not to participate.
 
2021-11-24 11:07:03 PM  

HallsOfMandos: Uodate:  smoked a bowl with aunt and now we're all watching The Good Place...progress?


Lol, was gonna ask, "do you got any weed?"
 
2021-11-24 11:10:32 PM  
You knew the job was dangerous when you took it...

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 11:14:01 PM  
I'm dreading Christmas a bit with mom. I know she knows how to behave herself, but sometimes she cuts loose after a bit of wine and my wife ain't gonna have it.
 
2021-11-24 11:17:26 PM  

make me some tea: I'm dreading Christmas a bit with mom. I know she knows how to behave herself, but sometimes she cuts loose after a bit of wine and my wife ain't gonna have it.


Yeah it got ugly here...ties were definitely cut but a semi peace has lasted for the 1st episode of TGP...
 
2021-11-24 11:23:41 PM  
Glad I don't have to put up with this kind of shiat with my family. We have widely divergent views on politics and religion. But nobody ever brings any of it up at gatherings, ever. We talk, catch up, poke fun at each other, and laugh a lot. It's never quiet. We break off into different 1 on 1 conversations, we really kinda like being together. We don't get into divisive shiat too short. I could drive all of them out of the room in 3 minutes with my opinions about organized religion followed by my Jesus On A Rubber Cross enactment but it's never necessary or even important.

I'm pretty lucky to have this family. My wife and I are the matriarch/patriarch and I think the family will be just fine when we're gone.
 
2021-11-24 11:28:39 PM  
And now salt in the wound....Netflix crapped out and now watching local news story about setting conversational boundaries at holidays to avoid controversy.
 
2021-11-24 11:37:14 PM  
live stream it.
 
2021-11-25 12:26:34 AM  
break out the sword and start swinging.
 
2021-11-25 1:09:24 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Show them that
 
2021-11-25 3:08:42 AM  
Call an uber and gtfo.
 
2021-11-25 4:24:54 AM  
Shoot the traitors then eat turkey in peace.
 
2021-11-25 4:36:33 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
Where's the lasanga John!
 
2021-11-25 4:42:39 AM  

maddog2030: Call an uber and gtfo.


Advice holds even if it's his own house.
 
2021-11-25 4:48:45 AM  
Fart. Fart loudly.
 
2021-11-25 5:30:29 AM  
Aw dammit Subby I was hoping for a link to a YouTube video so we could really get into the details of who's to blame.

But seriously, sympathies my friend. Families are very hard work for one reason or another as it is, and the last thing anyone needs is for a bunch of paranoid delusional bullshiat to add a whole new layer to that.

But since you're there now anyway, just demand that people behave like grownups and while everyone's got the right to their infantile dumbarse beliefs they need to shut the fark up about them in decent society. Smart Republicans (the late Bush Sr, Dick Cheney, even Paul Ryan) don't go around behaving like this so neither should the dumb ones even if they are a vast majority these days. And as for the gays, they've been out and proud for fifty fabulous years and they haven't yet ruined America or converted anyone who wasn't already flaming so let's stop that paranoia too and just let people live their lives. And as for CRT it doesn't exist, but point out that you LOVE the idea that the Trumpists are going to ban history texts and works of literature because if there's one thing that inspires kids to learn, it's "forbidden" material and they way Fox News is crapping on about the dangers of history and English class it's going to drive an entire generation of kids to learn a lot, lot more so congratulate them on that.
 
2021-11-25 5:52:32 AM  
Pick better relatives next time you reincarnate.
 
2021-11-25 6:29:14 AM  
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-25 6:45:55 AM  
Flip the table. The Thanksgiving table is the apex of table-flipping. You'll be a legend.
 
2021-11-25 6:50:58 AM  
Get a lawn chair, put it up near the Weber grill, grab a longneck Budweiser, and just sit there staring off into space.

You think your dad was out there every family reunion because he liked to cook? Don't be so naive.
 
2021-11-25 7:01:13 AM  
Ok everyone it's time to play my Thanksgiving party game! It's called "Guess which glasses I poisoned!" If you all work together you may figure it out before *glance at clock and trail off ominously*
 
2021-11-25 7:07:04 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


/ also: invest in a nice pair of noise cancelling headphones
 
2021-11-25 7:11:25 AM  
The older I get, the less I am willing to put up with listening to other people spew ignorant garbage. It means we no longer do holidays with extended family, which is sad. Such times were fun before Trump made idiocy cool. But I'd rather enjoy my tiny little family in peace than have to listen to that shiat.
 
2021-11-25 7:24:53 AM  
Solution: Invent a time machine and go back in time to warn your past self to not invite a bunch of hicks to your holiday gathering.
 
2021-11-25 7:39:34 AM  
"Oh, Thanksgiving with your family? Yeah, no. Sorry, gotta work on Thanksgiving day. Yeah, a swing shift, I have to be there at noon. Yeah, I'm really bummed."

The worst Thanksgiving at work has been better than the best Thanksgiving with my ex's ignorant, belligerent, alcoholic family. Her brother was the worst.  His filthy, ill-mannered spawn had no restraint and were always hopped up on red fruit drinks and he would try to start political arguments before you had your coat off.

When I "had" to be there, I ended up sitting quietly, pretending I didn't exist.
 
2021-11-25 7:46:35 AM  

Laobaojun: When I "had" to be there, I ended up sitting quietly, pretending I didn't exist.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-25 7:55:23 AM  
Dick or equivalent in the mashed potatoes.
 
2021-11-25 8:08:37 AM  
Since it would be my oldest sister and I against my entire extended family, we compromise and stay home, have our own dinner with immediate family.
 
2021-11-25 8:12:27 AM  

Brosephus: Fart. Fart loudly.


...and proudly. Ben Franklin wants you to.
 
2021-11-25 8:34:28 AM  
Here's hoping everyone slept it off...
 
2021-11-25 9:15:01 AM  
My stepfather's only son is in the "oll biness."  Oily's entire tribe is made up of right-wing hippie kids, which I never knew existed.  My entire tribe is pretty psycho, too.  About two years ago we stopped renting a big summer house together, and a year ago, stepfather died.  So bye oil people.  Now I just have my own psycho group of stoners and lefties.  Everybody's happy.
 
2021-11-25 9:31:46 AM  
weidert.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-25 9:42:52 AM  
Drink?
 
2021-11-25 9:43:42 AM  
For the second year in a row, Covid has farked over my Thanksgiving.  I'd rather be arguing with my family than sitting home alone.

/ my vaxxed nephew has Covid, again
// farking Michigan
 
2021-11-25 9:53:51 AM  

Donald_McRonald: Dick or equivalent in the mashed potatoes.


Richard in the mashed potatoes?
 
2021-11-25 9:56:44 AM  
Just slip out the back, Jack.
Make a new plan, Stan.
You don't need to be coy, Roy.
Just listen to me.
 
2021-11-25 10:01:33 AM  
Smoke another bowl.
 
2021-11-25 10:01:48 AM  

Gramma: For the second year in a row, Covid has farked over my Thanksgiving.  I'd rather be arguing with my family than sitting home alone.

/ my vaxxed nephew has Covid, again
// farking Michigan


It's been 2 years since I've seen my son, and I'd like to see him for Xmas, buuuuuuuuut...... :-/
 
2021-11-25 10:06:45 AM  

xanadian: Gramma: For the second year in a row, Covid has farked over my Thanksgiving.  I'd rather be arguing with my family than sitting home alone.

/ my vaxxed nephew has Covid, again
// farking Michigan

It's been 2 years since I've seen my son, and I'd like to see him for Xmas, buuuuuuuuut...... :-/


Oh, that sucks. I'm sorry.
 
2021-11-25 10:17:31 AM  
Set off the smoke detectors.
 
2021-11-25 10:31:45 AM  
Let an angry ocelot loose in the house.
 
2021-11-25 10:46:53 AM  
Just point out something about the holiday your neo-Nazi relatives may not realize.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-25 10:48:23 AM  

xanadian: Just slip out the back, Jack.
Make a new plan, Stan.
You don't need to be coy, Roy.
Just listen to me.


Reminds me of a joke at the time.
51st Way: Tell her you're gay, Ray,
 
2021-11-25 10:59:32 AM  
Just put this on and ignore everyone:

The MST3K TURKEY DAY MARATHON 2021
Youtube qsUixihhUSk


I'm the one making the meal and doing it and I don't have major family idiot problems.
 
2021-11-25 11:00:28 AM  

oncorhynchusobstetrician: Set off the smoke detectors.


Lock the doors, turn off the lights, set off the smoke detectors, and start swinging that axe handle you bought for "protection".
 
2021-11-25 11:01:27 AM  

Gramma: For the second year in a row, Covid has farked over my Thanksgiving.  I'd rather be arguing with my family than sitting home alone.

/ my vaxxed nephew has Covid, again
// farking Michigan


Drove to Pittsburgh yesterday, and my son promptly started coughing.  Spent a few hours this morning going to various pharmacies that claimed to have self tests in stock.  Finally got one at a Walgreens right when it opened.  Came to negative.  So at least that bullet was dodged.

1 more week until their second shots.
 
2021-11-25 11:07:53 AM  
As we all know, the answer is butt stuff.

/fark you're slippin'
 
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