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(Independent)   Survey: Half of women experience discomfort with you. That's the plural you, Casanova   (independent.co.uk) divider line
    More: Obvious, Sexual intercourse, per cent, Vaginal dryness, Woman, Vagina, Sexual arousal, Condom, Vaginal lubrication  
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4801 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Oct 2021 at 6:30 AM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



180 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-10-28 4:16:04 AM  
Hard to believe half of women have had sex in the back seat of a Volkswagen.

Still, they interviewed Ben Shapiro's wife, so they've got that going for them, which is nice.
 
2021-10-28 6:36:39 AM  
Half?
 
2021-10-28 6:37:30 AM  

8 inches: Half?


Username checks out.  Well played
 
2021-10-28 6:37:33 AM  
That's hot.
 
2021-10-28 6:42:38 AM  
With my magnum dong it's no surprise.  I suggest they learn to deal with it.
 
2021-10-28 6:45:15 AM  
"And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.
 
2021-10-28 6:47:57 AM  
Lower half or upper half?
 
2021-10-28 6:49:06 AM  
Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.
 
2021-10-28 6:50:44 AM  
Sooooooo lots and lots of foreplay, listen to your partner, and maybe don't start hammering away in the first ten minutes? farking your partner more or less the way they're farking you helps as well.

Of course this is fark and all of us are virgins so I just read this in a book.
 
2021-10-28 6:52:08 AM  
Casanova is s woody shrub in the Spurge family & is extensively cultivated in tropical & subtropical regions.

Yeah, maybe I should have asked first before I put the spurge where I did.  Awkward.
 
2021-10-28 6:52:18 AM  

Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.


They'll pick up the essential tricks as they go, like douching with Mountain Dew to prevent pregnancy.

Yes, that's a thing.
 
2021-10-28 6:52:52 AM  

Farking Clown Shoes: Hard to believe half of women have had sex in the back seat of a Volkswagen.

Still, they interviewed Ben Shapiro's wife, so they've got that going for them, which is nice.


At the same time?
 
2021-10-28 6:54:15 AM  

aagrajag: Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.

They'll pick up the essential tricks as they go, like douching with Mountain Dew to prevent pregnancy.

Yes, that's a thing.


...wat
 
2021-10-28 6:54:38 AM  

I May Be Crazy But...: Farking Clown Shoes: Hard to believe half of women have had sex in the back seat of a Volkswagen.

Still, they interviewed Ben Shapiro's wife, so they've got that going for them, which is nice.

At the same time?


Same time, but in different Volkswagens.
 
2021-10-28 6:58:29 AM  

Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.


Does that imply there isn't enough mansplaining about how baby is formed?
 
2021-10-28 7:00:34 AM  

aagrajag: Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.

They'll pick up the essential tricks as they go, like douching with Mountain Dew to prevent pregnancy.

Yes, that's a thing.


Dear god, it is.  A quick google search shows it (at least drinking it, anyway) goes back more than 20 years: https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/c​t​-xpm-2000-03-26-0003260022-story.html​.  I was in high school when this article came out and I had never heard it.

Also,
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 7:02:06 AM  

DON.MAC: Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.

Does that imply there isn't enough mansplaining about how baby is formed?


No.
 
2021-10-28 7:03:14 AM  

phenn: Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.


A gentleman never cums first.
 
2021-10-28 7:06:35 AM  
I guess were even then
 
2021-10-28 7:12:06 AM  

omg bbq: Sooooooo lots and lots of foreplay, listen to your partner, and maybe don't start hammering away in the first ten minutes? farking your partner more or less the way they're farking you helps as well.

Of course this is fark and all of us are virgins so I just read this in a book.


You've never had young kids in the house, have you?
 
2021-10-28 7:12:46 AM  
I wonder if a part of it at least is that Women are propagandized to in the media, that Men are inherently dangerous creatures. Almost every woman I meet is what I call a "5 minute person". That meaning, that I meet someone who I find attractive and interesting, but I only get maybe 5 or 10 minutes of conversation with them before I have to move on to some other task or chore and never see them again. But if I try to do something like ask for a phone number to enable a longer conversation, I'm automatically disregarded as a creep, or one of those "dangerous" people. While I'm working I keep it all about the immediate business at at hand, and not pursuing anything further as it could cost me my job. I tried that once, all I did was ask her if she was seeing anyone and it damn near got me fired. Apparently, asking that basic question makes me a stalker or a potential rapist.

I don't go out to clubs, that scene got boring when I was in my mid-20's. I am not interested in sitting with someone and watching them down mixed drinks all night until I have to carry them out and drive them home, 2/3 of the way to passing out. If I mention that "hey, yer hitting that kinda hard ain'tcha?" that apparently makes me an asshole. It is also a good reason to never really interact with that person again. I seriously dislike drunks, even the ones in my own family. To me that means that the person is more interested in getting drunk than actually engaging in conversation.

I'm not interested in Church, not interested in going to restaurants three or four times every week, not interested in sports.

I quit trying to meet women 30 years ago. It's mostly a waste of my time and obviously theirs.
 
2021-10-28 7:16:28 AM  
I cut the grass, fix the house and cars, do all the cooking, do the laundry and dishes, and give her my paychecks. The least she can do is be uncomfortable for 8 seconds a week.
 
2021-10-28 7:17:39 AM  
Well, quit wiggling around like it's like a gear shift and maybe both of us can stop hurting.
 
2021-10-28 7:20:19 AM  

aagrajag: Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.

They'll pick up the essential tricks as they go, like douching with Mountain Dew to prevent pregnancy.

Yes, that's a thing.


Is that before or after the Lysol?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 7:21:37 AM  
People, it's not that difficult. Lube and foreplay. If it still hurts, consult a physician or check that you are using the right hole.
 
2021-10-28 7:29:39 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 7:30:28 AM  

Screaming Candle: People, it's not that difficult. Lube and foreplay. If it still hurts, consult a physician or check that you are using the right hole.


There's a wrong hole?
 
2021-10-28 7:32:15 AM  

WTFDYW: Screaming Candle: People, it's not that difficult. Lube and foreplay. If it still hurts, consult a physician or check that you are using the right hole.

There's a wrong hole?


The internet doesn't think so. Even urethral sex is apparently possible.
 
2021-10-28 7:32:51 AM  

dionysusaur: phenn: Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.

A gentleman never cums first.


and may I remind you, I am no gentleman.
 
2021-10-28 7:33:18 AM  
You gotta let the oven warm up before you slam your roast in there
 
2021-10-28 7:33:50 AM  

Another Government Employee: omg bbq: Sooooooo lots and lots of foreplay, listen to your partner, and maybe don't start hammering away in the first ten minutes? farking your partner more or less the way they're farking you helps as well.

Of course this is fark and all of us are virgins so I just read this in a book.

You've never had young kids in the house, have you?


have a seat over there?
 
2021-10-28 7:33:50 AM  
Communication is critical.

My SO wasn't used to a man asking her what she wanted and how she felt, which I thought strange, but she warmed up to it after a while and is a LOT more interested in our alone time.
 
2021-10-28 7:34:18 AM  

AriadneN: aagrajag: Creoena: "And three in 10 women weren't even taught about the female anatomy. "

Goddamn you so much Alabama.

They'll pick up the essential tricks as they go, like douching with Mountain Dew to prevent pregnancy.

Yes, that's a thing.

Is that before or after the Lysol?

[Fark user image 347x750]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 7:36:20 AM  

WTFDYW: Screaming Candle: People, it's not that difficult. Lube and foreplay. If it still hurts, consult a physician or check that you are using the right hole.

There's a wrong hole?


If she says it's the wrong hole, it's the wrong hole.  Ask first.
 
2021-10-28 7:36:50 AM  
Oh, silly subby - no one cares about us women.

Not our feelings, not our physical health, not our safety, not our [character count exceeds Fark limits]....
 
2021-10-28 7:40:53 AM  

Creoena: Dear god, it is.  A quick google search shows it (at least drinking it, anyway) goes back more than 20 years:


Try a few more decades.  Bottled soft drinks starting being cheap in the 1950s.

Since most of the older soft drinks started out as snake oil medical tonics and were sold to cure all sorts of things I'm sure that would have included pregnancy.

The CO2 in fizzy drinks increases acidity and the old snake oil stuff was full of poison so I expect it worked just well enough to keep rumors going.
 
151 [OhFark]
2021-10-28 7:42:41 AM  

dionysusaur: phenn: Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.

A gentleman never cums first.


Fully agree, except in the situation where both (assuming one of them has a penis), love giving the other oral. Give me head first, then I'll have some time to recharge while I return the favor, for as long as she wants me to. Cigarette for me, vape for her, then the main (inter)course.

Works for us anyway.
 
2021-10-28 7:47:34 AM  

Deathfrogg: I wonder if a part of it at least is that Women are propagandized to in the media, that Men are inherently dangerous creatures. Almost every woman I meet is what I call a "5 minute person". That meaning, that I meet someone who I find attractive and interesting, but I only get maybe 5 or 10 minutes of conversation with them before I have to move on to some other task or chore and never see them again. But if I try to do something like ask for a phone number to enable a longer conversation, I'm automatically disregarded as a creep, or one of those "dangerous" people. While I'm working I keep it all about the immediate business at at hand, and not pursuing anything further as it could cost me my job. I tried that once, all I did was ask her if she was seeing anyone and it damn near got me fired. Apparently, asking that basic question makes me a stalker or a potential rapist.

I don't go out to clubs, that scene got boring when I was in my mid-20's. I am not interested in sitting with someone and watching them down mixed drinks all night until I have to carry them out and drive them home, 2/3 of the way to passing out. If I mention that "hey, yer hitting that kinda hard ain'tcha?" that apparently makes me an asshole. It is also a good reason to never really interact with that person again. I seriously dislike drunks, even the ones in my own family. To me that means that the person is more interested in getting drunk than actually engaging in conversation.

I'm not interested in Church, not interested in going to restaurants three or four times every week, not interested in sports.

I quit trying to meet women 30 years ago. It's mostly a waste of my time and obviously theirs.


I took it as a sign to get my act together when the only women who didn't think I was a creep were the drunks.
 
2021-10-28 7:48:47 AM  

AriadneN: Is that before or after the Lysol?
[Fark user image 347x750]


"Honey, your pussy  smells like a hospital corridor.  That gets me hot."
 
2021-10-28 7:52:03 AM  

Marcos P: You gotta let the oven warm up before you slam your roast in there


I just throw my cocktail weiner in the microwave. In and out in 20 seconds.
 
2021-10-28 7:53:59 AM  
If your fella is causing you pain, speak up. How difficult is that?
If you speak up and he doesn't care, time to move on to someone else.
 
2021-10-28 8:02:25 AM  

Hyjamon: dionysusaur: phenn: Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.

A gentleman never cums first.

and may I remind you, I am no gentleman.


My wife is not very tech savvy and refuses to learn.  She refuses to learn about a lot of things.

So I printed out an Ewok photo that says 'going in dry.' And hand it to her once in a while.

You'd think that would be enough warning, but I haven't been with her since our wedding night.  Not sure how I got all these kids, but clearly something is working.

So it's probably happening when we go to the pool or the beach. Something in the water, I bet.
 
2021-10-28 8:03:33 AM  
Huh. So my "Why I'm Single" T-shirt was right.
 
2021-10-28 8:06:28 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 8:07:47 AM  

dyhchong: Lower half or upper half?


Whichever is having to deal with the purple headed warrior.
 
2021-10-28 8:12:38 AM  
yeah well, large items have a tendency to do that
 
2021-10-28 8:14:13 AM  

dionysusaur: phenn: Find you a man who gives good mouth.

Problem solved.

A gentleman never cums first.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-28 8:15:52 AM  

Deathfrogg: I wonder if a part of it at least is that Women are propagandized to in the media, that Men are inherently dangerous creatures. Almost every woman I meet is what I call a "5 minute person". That meaning, that I meet someone who I find attractive and interesting, but I only get maybe 5 or 10 minutes of conversation with them before I have to move on to some other task or chore and never see them again. But if I try to do something like ask for a phone number to enable a longer conversation, I'm automatically disregarded as a creep, or one of those "dangerous" people. While I'm working I keep it all about the immediate business at at hand, and not pursuing anything further as it could cost me my job. I tried that once, all I did was ask her if she was seeing anyone and it damn near got me fired. Apparently, asking that basic question makes me a stalker or a potential rapist.

I don't go out to clubs, that scene got boring when I was in my mid-20's. I am not interested in sitting with someone and watching them down mixed drinks all night until I have to carry them out and drive them home, 2/3 of the way to passing out. If I mention that "hey, yer hitting that kinda hard ain'tcha?" that apparently makes me an asshole. It is also a good reason to never really interact with that person again. I seriously dislike drunks, even the ones in my own family. To me that means that the person is more interested in getting drunk than actually engaging in conversation.

I'm not interested in Church, not interested in going to restaurants three or four times every week, not interested in sports.

I quit trying to meet women 30 years ago. It's mostly a waste of my time and obviously theirs.


I hate the be the one to break it to you, but if every women you spend more than 10 minutes talking to things you are a creep, it is because you are creepy.

Perhaps spend more time evaluating what it is about you that makes us feel that way instead of blaming the media, which has an entirely misogynistic pov most of the time anyway.
 
2021-10-28 8:20:47 AM  

Hey Nurse!: I cut the grass, fix the house and cars, do all the cooking, do the laundry and dishes, and give her my paychecks. The least she can do is be uncomfortable for 8 seconds a week.


How did you convince your wife to have sex four nights a week!?
 
2021-10-28 8:21:44 AM  
Does this mean that half of men arent cunning linguists?
 
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