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(Slate)   Accidental Size Queen is the name of my Courtney Love tribute band   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Sexual intercourse, Human sexual behavior, Human sexuality, Oral sex, Marriage, Foreplay, HIV, V sex  
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679 clicks; posted to Discussion » and Main » on 27 Oct 2021 at 6:35 PM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



17 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-10-27 3:35:04 PM  
Start eating a lot of garden salads to justify buying cucumbers by the case.

Please don't feed them to your family afterward, because ewww.
 
2021-10-27 4:33:10 PM  

EvilEgg: Start eating a lot of garden salads to justify buying cucumbers by the case.

Please don't feed them to your family afterward, because ewww.


Funny you should mention it.

Cucumber Sandwich
Youtube gev_DzSqy7A


/Should be SFW... it ran on UK TV.
 
2021-10-27 5:34:09 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-27 6:35:15 PM  
Tell him you want to try double penetration with him in the back door and the big Dildo in the front. He'll jump for it.
 
2021-10-27 6:48:49 PM  
I hope you cover "Malibu".  I love that song.
 
2021-10-27 7:33:50 PM  
The premise of "Men are from Mars.  Women are from Venus." is largely that men approach conflict or stress with solutions.  If there's a problem, fix it.  Women prefer to discuss an issue to resolve how they feel about it.  You may not fix the problem, but discussion and acknowledgement of how a woman feels reduces the stress, which is really the original goal.  I suggest the wife discuss the issue with her husband.  She will feel better when he acknowledges he has a small penis and is being constantly and unfavorably compared to ex-boyfriends.  The husband now has a problem he can focus on fixing.  Everyone is happy.
 
2021-10-27 7:44:27 PM  

foo monkey: The premise of "Men are from Mars.  Women are from Venus." is largely that men approach conflict or stress with solutions.  If there's a problem, fix it.  Women prefer to discuss an issue to resolve how they feel about it.  You may not fix the problem, but discussion and acknowledgement of how a woman feels reduces the stress, which is really the original goal.  I suggest the wife discuss the issue with her husband.  She will feel better when he acknowledges he has a small penis and is being constantly and unfavorably compared to ex-boyfriends.  The husband now has a problem he can focus on fixing.  Everyone is happy.


If you read the fake article, she is literally looking for a solution, to include a big dick strap on or giant dildo.

No need to go all "men be like this" about it :)

That said, as a guy who isn't big if a woman needs more she needs to do one of two things:
1. Leave. Please leave, seriously. Life is short and if we don't match we don't match.
2. Get that dildo or strap on and let's give it a try.

People make far too big a deal about their penis, imo.
 
2021-10-27 7:52:59 PM  

foo monkey: The premise of "Men are from Mars.  Women are from Venus." is largely that men approach conflict or stress with solutions.  If there's a problem, fix it.  Women prefer to discuss an issue to resolve how they feel about it.  You may not fix the problem, but discussion and acknowledgement of how a woman feels reduces the stress, which is really the original goal.  I suggest the wife discuss the issue with her husband.  She will feel better when he acknowledges he has a small penis and is being constantly and unfavorably compared to ex-boyfriends.  The husband now has a problem he can focus on fixing.  Everyone is happy.


Bravo.  This is likely the very most optimistic advice in the history of optimistic advice.  However, any attempt I would make at giving advice would undoubtedly be worse.  This situation is not likely to end well.  I think any stress reduction would only be on the wife's side of things and would increase stress on the husband's side by a huge amount.  Or, more simply put, any amount of her feeling better will result in him feeling worse.
 
2021-10-27 8:39:22 PM  
This headline is underrated.
 
2021-10-27 9:24:31 PM  
Well maybe she should simply consider how she would feel if hubby said his previous two girlfriends had really nice big boobs and hers are decidedly not...and he really misses big boob sex.  How would she like him to tell her that?
 
2021-10-27 9:48:40 PM  
Grandma kept a copy of this in the guest bathroom in the 80s.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-27 10:01:53 PM  
Obvious propaganda from Big Cucumber
 
2021-10-27 10:22:26 PM  
The problem with dating size queens is that they'll dump you as soon as they find a bigger penis.

/there's always a bigger penis
 
2021-10-28 4:00:14 AM  

MoriartyLives: I hope you cover "Malibu".  I love that song.


Doll
Youtube 539GeTDGGKg
 
2021-10-28 4:06:58 AM  
Is headline Kurt Cobain's penis joke?
 
2021-10-28 5:08:01 AM  
It's funny she thinks he's got a small penis when she's the biggest coont in the marriage.  Hubby is going to get his heart broken at some point, either behind his back or straight to his face.  A big dildo is only going to be a temporary fix - she's eventually going to want the real Whopper.

When she leaves hubby for the next Mr Big, she'll find out guys with big todgers tend to like putting it about around lots of women, and she could go from small dick to single mother with only a rabbit.
 
2021-10-28 8:41:51 AM  

Only You Can See This: It's funny she thinks he's got a small penis when she's the biggest coont in the marriage.  Hubby is going to get his heart broken at some point, either behind his back or straight to his face.  A big dildo is only going to be a temporary fix - she's eventually going to want the real Whopper.

When she leaves hubby for the next Mr Big, she'll find out guys with big todgers tend to like putting it about around lots of women, and she could go from small dick to single mother with only a rabbit.


She might also be surprised to find out her looks have faded in the intervening years and she can no longer attract the 20 something hard bodies.
 
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