Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CBC)   Taking one-stop shopping to its logical next step, Canadian funeral homes pivot to offer rooms for medically assisted deaths   (cbc.ca) divider line
    More: Obvious, Funeral home, Funeral, Chapel, Hospice, funeral home owner Paul Needham, Debbie Pettit, Death customs, David Mullen  
•       •       •

842 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Oct 2021 at 1:31 PM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



49 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-10-26 12:18:19 PM  
Just like for a horse. You dig the hole, lead them in to it, and THEN shoot them.

Otherwise you need to move a dead horse.
 
2021-10-26 1:33:46 PM  
Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.
 
2021-10-26 1:36:40 PM  
Sounds reasonable.  Slowly drift off in a plastic-covered recliner while watching a nice Matlock, or perhaps a Perry Mason.  You won't find out who did it, but you also won't care.
 
Juc
2021-10-26 1:37:34 PM  
Doesn't seem like a bad idea, not like you're going for assisted suicide and being surprised that you'll end up dead.
 
2021-10-26 1:38:00 PM  
Although spending my last moments in a hospital room is not appealing, spending them in a funeral home would be a lot worse.
 
2021-10-26 1:40:45 PM  
I would think most people who choose it would prefer it to be at home, rather than some strange, sterile atmosphere.  I would, anyway.  Rather be in someplace that's familiar and comfortable than a place where you feel like you're supposed to run on a schedule because somebody's waiting for the room.
 
2021-10-26 1:42:46 PM  
Call me when there are Futurama style suicide booths.
 
2021-10-26 1:43:01 PM  
Canadian Soylent Green, eh?  Now with, like, 30% less hoser.
 
2021-10-26 1:43:16 PM  

Juc: Doesn't seem like a bad idea, not like you're going for assisted suicide and being surprised that you'll end up dead.


My mother in law made it very clear that the next time she went into hospital would probably be the last time she was ever home. She was sure of it.

She went in and was in bad shape. Suffering. She was ready to die. I hate calling it assisted suicide because she wasn't going to make it more than a couple of weeks either way. It was a question of suffering.

Doctors spoke to her when she was lucid and her wishes were clear. It broke our hearts but we love her so we supported her choice. My son - her only grandchild said goodbye.

An hour later, before they administered anything, she fell asleep. We stayed with her so she would not be alone when she woke up. She never did. 24 hours or so later, she passed on her own, naturally.

She decided she was ready to die, and then she did. She didn't even wait around for the medical assistance part of it.

But an ugly hospital room in a gown and one crappy chair.... I see where the funeral home might be nicer, so long as it isn't in the damn parlour itself with that cloying flower smell and creepy elevator music.
 
2021-10-26 1:43:46 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-26 1:43:49 PM  

MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.


Exact same time? Most people don't want to be burned to death
 
2021-10-26 1:45:53 PM  
Can I just die at home? Or, you know, somewhere nice?
 
2021-10-26 1:46:06 PM  

Billy Liar: I would think most people who choose it would prefer it to be at home, rather than some strange, sterile atmosphere.  I would, anyway.  Rather be in someplace that's familiar and comfortable than a place where you feel like you're supposed to run on a schedule because somebody's waiting for the room.


If I had family that was still going to be using the home, I'd rather not leave them with the memory of the place where I died that they'll be looking at every day.

I'd rather have a peaceful spot out in the woods somewhere.
 
2021-10-26 1:46:30 PM  

40 degree day: MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.

Exact same time? Most people don't want to be burned to death


Just goes to show you what a society of snowflakes we've become. Back in my day people burned to death all the time.  And that's the way we liked it.  Hell, I burned to death twice by the time I was 12. Of course folk were much tougher back then.
 
2021-10-26 1:49:01 PM  
death and taxes you got to pay sometime just not at an IRS office or a funeral home!
 
2021-10-26 1:49:12 PM  

SumoJeb: Although spending my last moments in a hospital room is not appealing, spending them in a funeral home would be a lot worse.


I dunno.  I could see a lot of people waiting around to see me actually die.  Then they could have a party.  Can't do that in a hospital.

Oh, you know I'm gonna fake 'em out a couple times.  Just the basterd I am.

"The tunnel of light...   I enter....."
Yeah!  He's dead!
"Just kidding.   No wait....  tis the final curtain.  Darkness descends....Oh my..."
Yeah.  He's dead!
"Ha ha.  Got you losers again.  Wait...I see angels on Ariels, in leather and chrome.   Swooping down from heaven to carry me home!"
Did he even have a motorcycle?  I think he's gone.  Someone get a mirror....
"Nope!  Still among the living.  Think I'll go for a walk (falls over dead)"
Kick him!
To see if he's alive?
No.  Just kick him.
 
2021-10-26 1:50:05 PM  
I suppose it's better than burying Grandma alive.
 
2021-10-26 1:51:09 PM  

40 degree day: MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.

Exact same time? Most people don't want to be burned to death


Also, most people in that situation are beyond being able to "hop" anywhere.  In Oregon (and other places where it's legal, I assume), the patient has to be terminal and within six months of 'the end'.  In fact, a good proportion of the people who choose it, don't live long enough to carry it out.

/ sorry for being such a downer, but it's not so light-hearted as people make it out to be
 
2021-10-26 1:52:14 PM  

Harry Freakstorm: Then they could have a party.  Can't do that in a hospital.


Some experience in a hospital cafeteria says "oh yeah they can".
 
2021-10-26 1:56:14 PM  
We have hospices where this usually takes place but there are limited beds and they are underfunded. They used to be funded by religious organizations and government grants but when MAID came into effect and they were required to offer it, a bunch closed. I guess the private sector found a gap to exploit.

MAID is medical aid in dying, it's what we call physician assisted suicide in Canada
 
Juc
2021-10-26 1:57:45 PM  

montreal_medic: Juc: Doesn't seem like a bad idea, not like you're going for assisted suicide and being surprised that you'll end up dead.

My mother in law made it very clear that the next time she went into hospital would probably be the last time she was ever home. She was sure of it.

She went in and was in bad shape. Suffering. She was ready to die. I hate calling it assisted suicide because she wasn't going to make it more than a couple of weeks either way. It was a question of suffering.

Doctors spoke to her when she was lucid and her wishes were clear. It broke our hearts but we love her so we supported her choice. My son - her only grandchild said goodbye.

An hour later, before they administered anything, she fell asleep. We stayed with her so she would not be alone when she woke up. She never did. 24 hours or so later, she passed on her own, naturally.

She decided she was ready to die, and then she did. She didn't even wait around for the medical assistance part of it.

But an ugly hospital room in a gown and one crappy chair.... I see where the funeral home might be nicer, so long as it isn't in the damn parlour itself with that cloying flower smell and creepy elevator music.


yeah my grandma's signed up for it. her days are numbered and we all know it, we just don't know exactly when her number will come up.
Stage 4 cancer and it's in her brain, she just wants to go while she's more or less still cognisant and before the pain becomes too much.
She's super blunt about it(and everything else) and I think I'm the only one out of her descendants who've inherited that trait from her. 
I mean we're all going to die eventually but it is what it is. I very much don't hold it against folks who pick this option.
If your death is immanent and inevitable and you can pick a way to go without it being torture, why wouldn't you?

I think if the funeral home makes it a nice place to die, people would go for it, especially folks who don't want to be a burden, like my grandma mistakenly thinks she is.
 
2021-10-26 1:58:58 PM  
"I ... vowed that rather than let Alzheimer's take me, I would take it. I would live my life as ever to the full and die, before the disease mounted its last attack, in my own home, in a chair on the lawn, with a brandy in my hand to wash down whatever modern version of the "Brompton cocktail" some helpful medic could supply. And with Thomas Tallis on my iPod, I would shake hands with Death. "

Pratchett, you left too soon.
 
2021-10-26 1:59:40 PM  
So my bed built on a trap door into an incinerator has some market potential...Shark tank here I come!!!
 
2021-10-26 2:00:48 PM  

fat boy: [Fark user image 251x201]


At least in the Thanatorium in "Soylent Green" they projected lovely nature images.    For farks sakes at least have walls that aren't plain eggshell white that you get in every crappy apartment.
 
2021-10-26 2:03:55 PM  
The prescience of 'Soylent Green', FTW!

lh3.googleusercontent.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-26 2:04:50 PM  
Well, it sounds better than ending it at the maternity ward.
 
2021-10-26 2:05:29 PM  
At the Freakstorm Death Center, we put the FUN in Funerals!

Comatose Clown Faces
Power Ranger oxygen mask/helmets
The Machine that Goes Beep
 
2021-10-26 2:07:49 PM  

Juc: montreal_medic: Juc: Doesn't seem like a bad idea, not like you're going for assisted suicide and being surprised that you'll end up dead.

My mother in law made it very clear that the next time she went into hospital would probably be the last time she was ever home. She was sure of it.

She went in and was in bad shape. Suffering. She was ready to die. I hate calling it assisted suicide because she wasn't going to make it more than a couple of weeks either way. It was a question of suffering.

Doctors spoke to her when she was lucid and her wishes were clear. It broke our hearts but we love her so we supported her choice. My son - her only grandchild said goodbye.

An hour later, before they administered anything, she fell asleep. We stayed with her so she would not be alone when she woke up. She never did. 24 hours or so later, she passed on her own, naturally.

She decided she was ready to die, and then she did. She didn't even wait around for the medical assistance part of it.

But an ugly hospital room in a gown and one crappy chair.... I see where the funeral home might be nicer, so long as it isn't in the damn parlour itself with that cloying flower smell and creepy elevator music.

yeah my grandma's signed up for it. her days are numbered and we all know it, we just don't know exactly when her number will come up.
Stage 4 cancer and it's in her brain, she just wants to go while she's more or less still cognisant and before the pain becomes too much.
She's super blunt about it(and everything else) and I think I'm the only one out of her descendants who've inherited that trait from her. 
I mean we're all going to die eventually but it is what it is. I very much don't hold it against folks who pick this option.
If your death is immanent and inevitable and you can pick a way to go without it being torture, why wouldn't you?

I think if the funeral home makes it a nice place to die, people would go for it, especially folks who don't want to be a burden, like my ...


May your Grandma find her release, and may your family mourn lightly and joke darkly..
 
2021-10-26 2:11:08 PM  
Wow...should have just called it Medically Assisted Dying (MAD).
Kind of like Soylent Green.  All that is left is turning them into food!

1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-26 2:12:23 PM  
If I feel the need to choose assisted suicide I would like to go out with some flair.
Maybe set up the room like a chicken shiat bingo card. Jab me full of cocaine and death drugs. Everyone there can guess which floor square I'll drop dead on and the winner gets the estate.
 
2021-10-26 2:13:06 PM  

goodncold: So my bed built on a trap door into an incinerator has some market potential...Shark tank here I come!!!


Well make up your mind: is it an incinerator or a shark tank?!
 
2021-10-26 2:13:45 PM  

MythDragon: 40 degree day: MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.

Exact same time? Most people don't want to be burned to death

Just goes to show you what a society of snowflakes we've become. Back in my day people burned to death all the time.  And that's the way we liked it.  Hell, I burned to death twice by the time I was 12. Of course folk were much tougher back then.


Username checks out...?
 
2021-10-26 2:29:58 PM  
I'll take the car crusher.
 
2021-10-26 2:30:12 PM  

MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.


cdn2.psychologytoday.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-26 2:33:27 PM  

Erik_Emune: "I ... vowed that rather than let Alzheimer's take me, I would take it. I would live my life as ever to the full and die, before the disease mounted its last attack, in my own home, in a chair on the lawn, with a brandy in my hand to wash down whatever modern version of the "Brompton cocktail" some helpful medic could supply. And with Thomas Tallis on my iPod, I would shake hands with Death. "

Pratchett, you left too soon.


I can agree, specifically with that diagnosis.

ALS and Alzheimer's took my grandmother. If she hadn't been staunchly Catholic I firmly believe she would have taken the same route.
 
2021-10-26 2:45:22 PM  

SumoJeb: Although spending my last moments in a hospital room is not appealing, spending them in a funeral home would be a lot worse.


Hum. Good point.

/
How about an apartment that is all bills paid, including final needs.
 
2021-10-26 2:46:13 PM  

Billy Liar: I would think most people who choose it would prefer it to be at home, rather than some strange, sterile atmosphere.  I would, anyway.  Rather be in someplace that's familiar and comfortable than a place where you feel like you're supposed to run on a schedule because somebody's waiting for the room.


Will the nurse come by less often like in a restaurant?
 
2021-10-26 2:46:53 PM  

neongoats: Call me when there are Futurama style suicide booths.


Call me when it has smack!
 
2021-10-26 2:48:34 PM  

40 degree day: MythDragon: Hop in a cardboard box and get a cremation and assisted death at the exact same time.  It's efficient and saves you money.

Exact same time? Most people don't want to be burned to death


Depends, will I be high AS fark?
 
2021-10-26 2:55:46 PM  
I'm not a fan of MAID, especially as we have arranged it in Canada because it marginalizes a lot of folks and shifts the standard of care.  It generates a cultural pressure that can harm some people and in an already strained socialized medical system it can become a de facto pressure to die rather than prolong expensive treatment or care.  These aren't slippery slope sorts of things, they already happen with the elderly, depressed, and chronically ill (there are lots of studies in countries where they have had it for a while and Canada is clearly going in the same direction).  Similar with Hospice care... it's hard enough to find folks who are properly trained in end of life care and pain management as it is, and adding MAID to the duties of those folks makes good training that much more difficult to accomplish in a widespread setting.

If we are going to do MAID, I would much rather see it done by specific practitioners trained for that specific purpose rather than the general medical community, so the idea of having a funeral home as a service provider actually makes sense.  They are going to get the end of life business anyway so it's not exactly a conflict of interest, and if the profession were separated from general medicine it would be easy for practitioners to be more flexible to meet the needs of the folks who want their last minutes to be somewhere special to them etc., while keeping hospitals and hospices culturally more safe for those who don't want the implied pressure at a time when they are possibly in the worst pain, mentally or physically (or both) they might experience.
 
2021-10-26 3:02:53 PM  

AstroJesus: I suppose it's better than burying Grandma alive.


Depends how big a Tuesday she was to you.
 
2021-10-26 3:05:34 PM  

austerity101: Can I just die at home? Or, you know, somewhere nice?


My Mom passed in hospice, adjacent to the hospital. The room is like a hotel room with a hospital bed. Fold-out sofa if someone wants to sleep.

YMMV, but they try.
 
2021-10-26 3:14:28 PM  

foxy_canuck: I'm not a fan of MAID, especially as we have arranged it in Canada because it marginalizes a lot of folks and shifts the standard of care.  It generates a cultural pressure that can harm some people and in an already strained socialized medical system it can become a de facto pressure to die rather than prolong expensive treatment or care.  These aren't slippery slope sorts of things, they already happen with the elderly, depressed, and chronically ill (there are lots of studies in countries where they have had it for a while and Canada is clearly going in the same direction).  Similar with Hospice care... it's hard enough to find folks who are properly trained in end of life care and pain management as it is, and adding MAID to the duties of those folks makes good training that much more difficult to accomplish in a widespread setting.

If we are going to do MAID, I would much rather see it done by specific practitioners trained for that specific purpose rather than the general medical community, so the idea of having a funeral home as a service provider actually makes sense.  They are going to get the end of life business anyway so it's not exactly a conflict of interest, and if the profession were separated from general medicine it would be easy for practitioners to be more flexible to meet the needs of the folks who want their last minutes to be somewhere special to them etc., while keeping hospitals and hospices culturally more safe for those who don't want the implied pressure at a time when they are possibly in the worst pain, mentally or physically (or both) they might experience.


assisted suicide can only be administered by a medical professional.  I believe that there is also a 10 waiting period.
 
2021-10-26 3:47:11 PM  
Reading this thread makes me feel like I should apply.
 
2021-10-26 8:59:51 PM  

foxy_canuck: I'm not a fan of MAID, especially as we have arranged it in Canada because it marginalizes a lot of folks and shifts the standard of care.  It generates a cultural pressure that can harm some people and in an already strained socialized medical system it can become a de facto pressure to die rather than prolong expensive treatment or care.  These aren't slippery slope sorts of things, they already happen with the elderly, depressed, and chronically ill (there are lots of studies in countries where they have had it for a while and Canada is clearly going in the same direction).  Similar with Hospice care... it's hard enough to find folks who are properly trained in end of life care and pain management as it is, and adding MAID to the duties of those folks makes good training that much more difficult to accomplish in a widespread setting.

If we are going to do MAID, I would much rather see it done by specific practitioners trained for that specific purpose rather than the general medical community, so the idea of having a funeral home as a service provider actually makes sense.  They are going to get the end of life business anyway so it's not exactly a conflict of interest, and if the profession were separated from general medicine it would be easy for practitioners to be more flexible to meet the needs of the folks who want their last minutes to be somewhere special to them etc., while keeping hospitals and hospices culturally more safe for those who don't want the implied pressure at a time when they are possibly in the worst pain, mentally or physically (or both) they might experience.


My mom does some hospice care stuff for her work and she described a situation like that. There's just an awful sort of horror to being encouraged to die because it costs money to visit you since the kids live abroad. She went through with it. My mom was circumspect, but I found it horrifying.

Your proposal seems smart, though.
 
2021-10-27 2:33:25 AM  

goodncold: So my bed built on a trap door into an incinerator has some market potential...Shark tank here I come!!!


Kevin O'Leary could test it out on live TV!
 
2021-10-27 8:48:23 AM  

Gorn Fishin': The prescience of 'Soylent Green', FTW!

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 620x268]


Brought to you by Tim Hortons.

Try our soylent maple dutchie, now with 20% less bone dust.

Kidding aside, Euthanasia is a human right.

For those of us who had family members speak to us about it before they wasted away into a world of shiat and suffering where their faculties deserted them until they were a prisoner of pain in a body that refused to quit, well I wish America was more enlightened.
 
2021-10-27 11:14:12 AM  
Of course this decommissioning ceremony is held at a nice funeral home. It beats holding the carousel in a gloomy, spartan hospital room and is less pricey than a hospice for the last stage of non-viability lifewise.

All Praise the Lord Ford!
 
2021-10-27 11:17:40 AM  

p51d007: Wow...should have just called it Medically Assisted Dying (MAD).
Kind of like Soylent Green.  All that is left is turning them into food!

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 640x237]


Speaking of Our Lord and Saviour, The Donald, what is Mutually Assured Destruction and the Madman Theory (originally Richard Nixon's chief foreign policy) whereby you keep your enemies terrorized by being the greatest Madman while calling any ally or friend who resists your bidding a madman) if not the same thing? Politics as done by conservatives is really just a sort of pre-mature death planning for the "useless" and the " too stubborn to die at the convenience of their heirs and the taxman).
 
Displayed 49 of 49 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.