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(Slate)   "Dune Is a Ponderous Striptease With a Very Impressive Sandworm." I have no idea what the review actually says; still trying to process this headline   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, House Atreides, Dune, Paul Atreides, Arrakis, Bene Gesserit, Leto Atreides II, Lady Jessica, Dune universe  
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1109 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 22 Oct 2021 at 9:05 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-10-22 7:55:04 AM  
That is a winner of a headline.
 
2021-10-22 8:22:22 AM  
It was a true epic. Now the second movie just needs to stick the landing.
 
2021-10-22 8:22:43 AM  
Ponderous Striptease With a Very Impressive Sandwormis the name of my one man drag show.
 
2021-10-22 8:29:42 AM  
Spoiler alert:  The review was made by someone who has never actually read the book (or watched any of the previous movies/miniseries).

/Can't wait to sit down this weekend and watch it.
 
2021-10-22 8:51:06 AM  

Driedsponge: Spoiler alert:  The review was made by someone who has never actually read the book (or watched any of the previous movies/miniseries).

/Can't wait to sit down this weekend and watch it.


Or just realizes that Herbert's work, and anything remotely faithful to it isn't overly fond of humanity in general.

Dune is less a story than a chain of thought exercises. Which has some value, but it is pretty much antiseptic and humorless. Which, is kind of the point where the books are concerned. It's not a story about people, but about ideas, movements, the tides that carry those ideas and how they easily grow beyond even their leaders' ability to control.

Dune is impressive, but it's far from enjoyable from a story perspective. As a chain of thought experiments, it's grand.
 
2021-10-22 8:53:32 AM  
the movie was awesome, i don't care what you all say.
 
2021-10-22 8:57:21 AM  
FTFA: This film is a curiously paradoxical achievement: a visual and aural marvel that is also a crashing bore.

The backhanded premise is the last sentence in the review.
 
2021-10-22 8:59:02 AM  
I've come to the conclusion that movie reviewers are about the most useless opinion dispensing windbags outside of Tucker Carlson.

When the object of going to a movie is not to enjoy it - but to find all the things wrong with it, you are coming from the opposite angle than most of us.

I would venture to say that the average movie goer just wants to have a couple of hours of escapism.  Most of us are fine if the movie isn't perfect.  Despite all of its flaws if you were entertained by a movie, then it did its job.

We don't need annoying pseudo-experts telling us we should or shouldn't enjoy a movie based on their esoteric concepts of what a movie is supposed to be.

A movie could be universally hated, but if you like it - then that is the only opinion that matters.

Not to mention that if these reviewers are such experts they would you know - actually be making movies instead of writing about the work of others.
 
2021-10-22 9:00:31 AM  
The movie "Striptease" was also a pretty good story once you make it out of the bunk.
 
2021-10-22 9:01:10 AM  
I'm still going with the first review I saw.

This feels like the 3rd episode of a really good 6 episode tv show
 
2021-10-22 9:03:49 AM  
Why do people feel the need to make this into a book report for 18th century English Lit?

No one gives a f*ck what YOU (the critic) thinks about the movie. Get over yourself already.

/It was fantastic.
 
2021-10-22 9:04:36 AM  

ralanprod: I've come to the conclusion that movie reviewers are about the most useless opinion dispensing windbags outside of Tucker Carlson.

When the object of going to a movie is not to enjoy it - but to find all the things wrong with it, you are coming from the opposite angle than most of us.

I would venture to say that the average movie goer just wants to have a couple of hours of escapism.  Most of us are fine if the movie isn't perfect.  Despite all of its flaws if you were entertained by a movie, then it did its job.

We don't need annoying pseudo-experts telling us we should or shouldn't enjoy a movie based on their esoteric concepts of what a movie is supposed to be.

A movie could be universally hated, but if you like it - then that is the only opinion that matters.

Not to mention that if these reviewers are such experts they would you know - actually be making movies instead of writing about the work of others.


You sound like a studio shill, dude. In fact, there seems to be waaaay too much positive reaction being pushed in the comment sections of entertainment sites for it NOT to be studio driven.
 
2021-10-22 9:09:06 AM  
Ponderous reviews are the mind killer.
 
2021-10-22 9:11:08 AM  
...I'm still stuck on the reviewer apparently using "ponderous striptease" as a put-down.
 
2021-10-22 9:12:53 AM  
I watched it last night. It is a good movie and I cannot wait to watch the next installment.
 
2021-10-22 9:14:39 AM  
A lot of people who have called this movie slow are the same ones who tell me to watch four hours of bad television because "IT GETS GOOD IF YOU STICK WITH IT TIL EPISODE 5!"
 
2021-10-22 9:18:09 AM  
Looks like I'm taking a road trip to the nearest IMAX. I cannot wait!
 
2021-10-22 9:19:27 AM  

ralanprod: I've come to the conclusion that movie reviewers are about the most useless opinion dispensing windbags outside of Tucker Carlson.

When the object of going to a movie is not to enjoy it - but to find all the things wrong with it, you are coming from the opposite angle than most of us.

I would venture to say that the average movie goer just wants to have a couple of hours of escapism.  Most of us are fine if the movie isn't perfect.  Despite all of its flaws if you were entertained by a movie, then it did its job.

We don't need annoying pseudo-experts telling us we should or shouldn't enjoy a movie based on their esoteric concepts of what a movie is supposed to be.

A movie could be universally hated, but if you like it - then that is the only opinion that matters.

Not to mention that if these reviewers are such experts they would you know - actually be making movies instead of writing about the work of others.


Modern movie reviewers really aren't concerned with telling you whether a movie is good or not, they are simply obsessed with perpetuating what they already believe. The premise of the movie doesn't matter to reviewers these days, if they feel the need to shiat on a movie they will find a way to do it no matter what.

Movie reviews have simply become Instagram influencers with a better vocabulary.
 
2021-10-22 9:21:40 AM  

some_beer_drinker: the movie was awesome, i don't care what you all say.


Same here!  I loved it.
 
2021-10-22 9:22:52 AM  

Bslim: ralanprod: I've come to the conclusion that movie reviewers are about the most useless opinion dispensing windbags outside of Tucker Carlson.

When the object of going to a movie is not to enjoy it - but to find all the things wrong with it, you are coming from the opposite angle than most of us.

I would venture to say that the average movie goer just wants to have a couple of hours of escapism.  Most of us are fine if the movie isn't perfect.  Despite all of its flaws if you were entertained by a movie, then it did its job.

We don't need annoying pseudo-experts telling us we should or shouldn't enjoy a movie based on their esoteric concepts of what a movie is supposed to be.

A movie could be universally hated, but if you like it - then that is the only opinion that matters.

Not to mention that if these reviewers are such experts they would you know - actually be making movies instead of writing about the work of others.

You sound like a studio shill, dude. In fact, there seems to be waaaay too much positive reaction being pushed in the comment sections of entertainment sites for it NOT to be studio driven.


Is it possible at all that a lot of people simply like the movie?

We have been fed so much Transformers level brain-dead bullshiat that it almost seems like people are afraid to accept that a good movie might actually be that; a good movie.

This is a good movie.
 
2021-10-22 9:23:14 AM  

OldRod: some_beer_drinker: the movie was awesome, i don't care what you all say.

Same here!  I loved it.


Add me to the list. I don't even really like the "Dune" setting, but man the movie was fantastic.  Really brought it to life for me.
 
2021-10-22 9:23:50 AM  
I liked it a lot.

It's faithful enough to the book that I didn't have any major complaints with the changes but it doesn't get so bogged down in details that it would alienate someone who doesn't know the source material.

Pretty stoked to hear that they're already starting the prep work on part 2.
 
2021-10-22 9:26:57 AM  

some_beer_drinker: the movie was awesome, i don't care what you all say.


I can't wait to see it this weekend; it'll be the first time in ~2 years I've been to a movie theater (hope my gift card still works!)

I've enjoyed the various incarnations of Dune over the years for what they were. Lynch's version took huge liberties with the story line, but had wonderful music, set & costume design; the SciFi series (both of them) dragged on in parts, but was a closer rendition of the book. I'm hoping Villeneuve can marry a faithful retelling with sumptuous cinematography, and achieve the best of both worlds.
 
2021-10-22 9:27:08 AM  
It's pretty easy to spot the writers who went into the theater ready to hate Dune because it's a science fiction epic, not a historical one.
 
2021-10-22 9:28:06 AM  

Bslim: .

You sound like a studio shill, dude. In fact, there seems to be waaaay too much positive reaction being pushed in the comment sections of entertainment sites for it NOT to be studio driven.


Nope. Just a guy who prefers to form his own opinions rather than listen to the drivel of people that are self professed experts.

As for positive reaction - there does exist the possibility that people like the movie or are negative opinions the only valid ones?

Lambskincoat: The movie "Striptease" was also a pretty good story once you make it out of the bunk.


I think this is a good example of a movie that you can enjoy as long as you aren't taking it seriously. It's goofy.  It's meant to be goofy. How can you not laugh at Burt Reynolds explaining to his flunky the joys of being covered head to toe in Vaseline?
 
2021-10-22 9:28:22 AM  

Martian_Astronomer: ...I'm still stuck on the reviewer apparently using "ponderous striptease" as a put-down.


Insert Clapping_Vag.gif here.
 
2021-10-22 9:29:22 AM  
I don't give a good god damn what reviewers say...I have an IMAX appoitment with this movie on Thursday.
 
2021-10-22 9:40:20 AM  
You know what? I'm gonna fire up this garbage heap of a film now, just so I can confirm how much it really sucks.
 
2021-10-22 9:40:49 AM  
Well shot. Good performances so far. Slower than a pitch drip experiment.

I can read the novel in less time than this first half runtime.
 
2021-10-22 9:43:04 AM  
I've never read the book or watched the previous movie, but I sat down and watched the new one last night and was thoroughly impressed.

So much so that I pulled the book off of my bookshelf to make it my next read after I'm done with the one I'm on now.
 
2021-10-22 9:44:09 AM  

HedlessChickn: I've never read the book or watched the previous movie, but I sat down and watched the new one last night and was thoroughly impressed.

So much so that I pulled the book off of my bookshelf to make it my next read after I'm done with the one I'm on now.


i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-22 9:46:25 AM  
One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.
 
2021-10-22 9:48:45 AM  
I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).
 
2021-10-22 9:52:27 AM  

plecos: I don't give a good god damn what reviewers say...I have an IMAX appoitment with this movie on Thursday.


And I just checked and I'm still the only reservation in the IMAX.  Yes!
 
2021-10-22 9:52:53 AM  

Michael J Faux: One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.


Not only that but the design aesthetic was definitely geared towards to audiences at once. Those familiar with Dune are going to catch you many many many subtle references then add to the scene for them. For those unfamiliar those exact same design elements are lending to a deep rich atmosphere that will be fully paid off if the viewer picks up the book and start reading.

The book is a 20-hour read, I'm not surprised at all that a lot of scenes and elements have been either Consolidated, shifted to other characters, or left out entirely. It's going to happen with any instance where a book is converted into a movie.
 
2021-10-22 9:55:32 AM  

oldfarthenry: I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).


I guess it's good that you are comfortable in your willful ignorance of all that is around you based on your preconceived notions then.

Hooray for you, I guess.

Every thread to these days needs a blind contrarian.
 
2021-10-22 9:56:35 AM  

oldfarthenry: I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-22 9:58:40 AM  

oldfarthenry: I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size

You made an effort. Here's you fark participation trophy. Now hush, adults are talking.
 
2021-10-22 9:59:32 AM  

oldfarthenry: I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).


Well thank you for your opinion.  It's...uh...an opinion? Of sorts?
 
2021-10-22 10:01:40 AM  

BafflerMeal: oldfarthenry: I've avoided reading the book & watching the movie/tv series as it seems to be required pop-culture for neckbeards (along with listening to Rush & getting all argumentative about Star Trek vs Star Wars).

[Fark user image image 425x256]


I just love the visuals of the new film!
 
2021-10-22 10:03:00 AM  

rummonkey: Michael J Faux: One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.

Not only that but the design aesthetic was definitely geared towards to audiences at once. Those familiar with Dune are going to catch you many many many subtle references then add to the scene for them. For those unfamiliar those exact same design elements are lending to a deep rich atmosphere that will be fully paid off if the viewer picks up the book and start reading.

The book is a 20-hour read, I'm not surprised at all that a lot of scenes and elements have been either Consolidated, shifted to other characters, or left out entirely. It's going to happen with any instance where a book is converted into a movie.


20 hours? It's a little over 400 pages. For me that's a couple of hours at most, counting rereading parts to check back, refilling drink, and grabbing munchies. For the average reader it still shouldn't be more than 6-7 hours.
 
2021-10-22 10:06:34 AM  
What that headline means is that there's no wrap up and payoff because the reviewer apparently didn't realize it's part 1 of potentially 3 (Messiah and Children being the 2nd and 3rd respectively though Children isn't required to complete the initial story)

Watched it last night and I am VERY happy with this movie.

Without spoiling anything... The book is a very large exposition dump where the author spends hundreds of pages filling the reader in on a lot of historical and cultural exposition. Sometimes it's through a medium like excerpts of an encyclopedia, sometimes the author just decides to spend time telling the reader himself.

What Denis Villenaveau has done is an AMAZING job of translating all of that expository bullshiat into a visual backdrop that makes the universe feel lived in AND doesn't treat the audience like morons by having some character exposit the significance or meaning behind it all. It just happens, it feels natural and those that read the books will know EXACTLY what the significance is, while those that know nothing of the books will get a sense that whatever is happening in the foreground or background is there because it belongs there.

And even though they made some character changes (changing the gender of at least one character) it doesn't have any affect on the story whatsoever. I suspect that they are also combining 2 characters into one for the second film (The character played by Dave Bautista).
 
2021-10-22 10:07:03 AM  

Boojum2k: rummonkey: Michael J Faux: One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.

Not only that but the design aesthetic was definitely geared towards to audiences at once. Those familiar with Dune are going to catch you many many many subtle references then add to the scene for them. For those unfamiliar those exact same design elements are lending to a deep rich atmosphere that will be fully paid off if the viewer picks up the book and start reading.

The book is a 20-hour read, I'm not surprised at all that a lot of scenes and elements have been either Consolidated, shifted to other characters, or left out entirely. It's going to happen with any instance where a book is converted into a movie.

20 hours? It's a little over 400 pages. For me that's a couple of hours at most, counting rereading parts to check back, refilling drink, and grabbing munchies. For the average reader it still shouldn't be more than 6-7 hours.


Fark user imageView Full Size


When I read it myself I tend to clock in at about 12 to 15 hours depending on how many times I have to go and do other things.

Congratulations on speed reading and missing most of the book.
 
2021-10-22 10:07:49 AM  

Driedsponge: Spoiler alert:  The review was made by someone who has never actually read the book (or watched any of the previous movies/miniseries).

/Can't wait to sit down this weekend and watch it.


The movie should be able to stand on its own though. "Go and read this book for a week and then you'll know what story I'm trying to tell with my movie" isn't a winning move.
 
2021-10-22 10:08:49 AM  

rummonkey: Boojum2k: rummonkey: Michael J Faux: One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.

Not only that but the design aesthetic was definitely geared towards to audiences at once. Those familiar with Dune are going to catch you many many many subtle references then add to the scene for them. For those unfamiliar those exact same design elements are lending to a deep rich atmosphere that will be fully paid off if the viewer picks up the book and start reading.

The book is a 20-hour read, I'm not surprised at all that a lot of scenes and elements have been either Consolidated, shifted to other characters, or left out entirely. It's going to happen with any instance where a book is converted into a movie.

20 hours? It's a little over 400 pages. For me that's a couple of hours at most, counting rereading parts to check back, refilling drink, and grabbing munchies. For the average reader it still shouldn't be more than 6-7 hours.

[Fark user image image 425x510]

When I read it myself I tend to clock in at about 12 to 15 hours depending on how many times I have to go and do other things.

Congratulations on speed reading and missing most of the book.


Stupid question. Is that an audiobook app?
 
2021-10-22 10:09:49 AM  

ralanprod: I've come to the conclusion that movie reviewers are about the most useless opinion dispensing windbags outside of Tucker Carlson.

When the object of going to a movie is not to enjoy it - but to find all the things wrong with it, you are coming from the opposite angle than most of us.

I would venture to say that the average movie goer just wants to have a couple of hours of escapism.  Most of us are fine if the movie isn't perfect.  Despite all of its flaws if you were entertained by a movie, then it did its job.

We don't need annoying pseudo-experts telling us we should or shouldn't enjoy a movie based on their esoteric concepts of what a movie is supposed to be.

A movie could be universally hated, but if you like it - then that is the only opinion that matters.

Not to mention that if these reviewers are such experts they would you know - actually be making movies instead of writing about the work of others.


Those who can't do, become critics.
 
2021-10-22 10:09:56 AM  
Dune is one of my favorite novels of all tome. I have reread it probably a dozen times over the years. I was bored to tears by this film. Even major plot points like dr. yueh's betrayal felt like an afterthought. Major characters were barely shown or not at all.

But boy were there some beautiful dream sequences.
 
2021-10-22 10:09:57 AM  

Extra Virgin Geek Olive Oil: What that headline means is that there's no wrap up and payoff because the reviewer apparently didn't realize it's part 1 of potentially 3 (Messiah and Children being the 2nd and 3rd respectively though Children isn't required to complete the initial story)

Watched it last night and I am VERY happy with this movie.

Without spoiling anything... The book is a very large exposition dump where the author spends hundreds of pages filling the reader in on a lot of historical and cultural exposition. Sometimes it's through a medium like excerpts of an encyclopedia, sometimes the author just decides to spend time telling the reader himself.

What Denis Villenaveau has done is an AMAZING job of translating all of that expository bullshiat into a visual backdrop that makes the universe feel lived in AND doesn't treat the audience like morons by having some character exposit the significance or meaning behind it all. It just happens, it feels natural and those that read the books will know EXACTLY what the significance is, while those that know nothing of the books will get a sense that whatever is happening in the foreground or background is there because it belongs there.

And even though they made some character changes (changing the gender of at least one character) it doesn't have any affect on the story whatsoever. I suspect that they are also combining 2 characters into one for the second film (The character played by Dave Bautista).


The scene with the box is a great example of that. There are easily about ten pages of exposition from the novel they were summed up in three sentences that were subtitled at the bottom of the screen.
 
2021-10-22 10:10:58 AM  

rummonkey: Boojum2k: rummonkey: Michael J Faux: One thing that I indeed loved about this movie (and I loved a lot of it) was that the design aesthetic was all about shapes, not simply busying up every square inch of the screen with greeblies.

Not only that but the design aesthetic was definitely geared towards to audiences at once. Those familiar with Dune are going to catch you many many many subtle references then add to the scene for them. For those unfamiliar those exact same design elements are lending to a deep rich atmosphere that will be fully paid off if the viewer picks up the book and start reading.

The book is a 20-hour read, I'm not surprised at all that a lot of scenes and elements have been either Consolidated, shifted to other characters, or left out entirely. It's going to happen with any instance where a book is converted into a movie.

20 hours? It's a little over 400 pages. For me that's a couple of hours at most, counting rereading parts to check back, refilling drink, and grabbing munchies. For the average reader it still shouldn't be more than 6-7 hours.

[Fark user image 425x510]

When I read it myself I tend to clock in at about 12 to 15 hours depending on how many times I have to go and do other things.

Congratulations on speed reading and missing most of the book.


I have the combined version and it clocks in at 50-55 hours on audible.
 
2021-10-22 10:11:33 AM  

Extra Virgin Geek Olive Oil: What that headline means is that there's no wrap up and payoff because the reviewer apparently didn't realize it's part 1 of potentially 3 (Messiah and Children being the 2nd and 3rd respectively though Children isn't required to complete the initial story)

Watched it last night and I am VERY happy with this movie.

Without spoiling anything... The book is a very large exposition dump where the author spends hundreds of pages filling the reader in on a lot of historical and cultural exposition. Sometimes it's through a medium like excerpts of an encyclopedia, sometimes the author just decides to spend time telling the reader himself.

What Denis Villenaveau has done is an AMAZING job of translating all of that expository bullshiat into a visual backdrop that makes the universe feel lived in AND doesn't treat the audience like morons by having some character exposit the significance or meaning behind it all. It just happens, it feels natural and those that read the books will know EXACTLY what the significance is, while those that know nothing of the books will get a sense that whatever is happening in the foreground or background is there because it belongs there.

And even though they made some character changes (changing the gender of at least one character) it doesn't have any affect on the story whatsoever. I suspect that they are also combining 2 characters into one for the second film (The character played by Dave Bautista).


Yeah, the book had more pointless exposition and background than Moby Dick.  The movie did a great job of distilling the important themes and presenting them in a coherent way while translating Herbert's rich visual imagery very nicely. It's gorgeous.
 
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